Square Peg, Round Soul
by Bommaloo
Summary: When your soul is scoured clean and raw, and all seems lost, can it's new shape save you? Can you fit a square peg and a round soul? M for language and prob lemons. Bella/Sam
1. Prologue

**So then, here we go... After years and years of reading fanfic, and writing my own without having the guts to publish, I've finally bitten the bullet with this, my first ever posted story.** **I'm going with the standard start point of 'Edward leaves Bella' but I'm hoping that my way is different enough to make this story stand out. Un betaed, so if anyone wants to volunteer I'd be grateful. Please review so I know how I can improve. Well that's it. Enjoy. :0)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit. **

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Prologue:

_ "He was gone._

_With shaky legs, ignoring the fact that my action was useless, I followed him into the forest. The evidence of his path had disappeared instantly. There were no footprints, the leaves were still again, but I walked forward without thinking. I could not do anything else. I had to keep moving. If I stopped looking for him, it was over. _

_Love, life, meaning...over."_ New Moon, pg 73

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_ "Finally, I tripped over something - it was black now, I had no idea what caught my foot - and I stayed down. I rolled onto my side, so that I could breathe, and curled up on the wet bracken." _New Moon, pg 73

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_ "Suddenly, there was another sound, startlingly close. A kind of snuffling, an animal sound. It sounded big. I wondered if I should feel afraid. I didn't - just numb. It didn't matter. The snuffling went away."_ New Moon, pg 74-75

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_ "The brightness blinded me for a moment._

_"Bella."_

_The voice was deep and unfamiliar, but full of recognition. He wasn't calling my name to search, he was acknowledging that I was found. _

_I stared up - impossibly high it seemed - at the dark face that I could now see above me. I was vaguely aware that the stranger probably only looked so tall because my head was still on the ground. _

_"Have you been hurt?"_

_I knew the words meant something, but I could only stare, bewildered. How could the meaning matter at this point?_

_"Bella, my name is Sam Uley.""_ New Moon, pg 75

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_ "I felt the smooth wooden floor beneath my knees, and then the palms of my hands, and then it was pressed against the skin of my cheek. I hoped that I was fainting, but, to my disappointment, I didn't lose consciousness. The waves of pain that had only lapped at me before now reared high up and washed over my head, pulling me under._

_I did not resurface."_ New Moon, pg 84


	2. Chapter 1: Pits and Ladders

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that like to write for no profit.**

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Chapter 1: Pits and ladders

At first my pit was not my choice. My chest had been hollowed out, my soul scoured red raw, I couldn't breathe, couldn't make my heart beat right, couldn't function in any way. Once I'd got used to the pain, familiarised myself with it, I began digging away at the pit. Not to escape it, but to make it deeper. I knew it was probably futile; irreversible damage had almost definitely already been done, but i had to try. I _had_ to make myself isolated, untouchable, static, completely unaltered and unalterable. It was the only hope in case Edw..._He_ came back. Or we wouldn't fit anymore and then I would have lost my everything again.

It was the dreams that first began my long climb out of my pit. No. That's not right. Rather it was my _worry_ about my dreams that saw me starting to gain some awareness and put my foot on the first rung of the ladder. Some people say they don't remember their dreams most nights, but that's not something I'd ever experienced myself. I've _always_ remembered mine. Often they were just your standard gibberish; being late to history class and then finding that, not only was there a pop quiz, but that I'd forgotten everything I ever knew about the civil war, along with most of my clothes, and my teacher's yelling at me in Russian about not bringing my pet turtle into class with me, except its not my teacher, it's Simon Cowell, and he's telling me "I'm afraid it's a 'no' this time, Bella." That sort of dream.

But sometimes my dreams have a crystal clarity. The colours so much brighter. The sounds so much clearer, and the details so minute rather than the standard dream vagueness. _Those_ dreams will often repeat themselves night after night until I accept what my brain is trying to tell me. _Those_ dreams, I've always believed are my subconscious' way of filtering all my facts, even those I didn't know I had, filling in the gaps with tiny logical jumps, and pointing out to me the unescapable truth of a situation, and what I should do about it. It was a series of dreams like this that led me to the conclusion that I needed to let Renee and Phil have some space and go live with Charlie. It was another series of dreams like this that helped me fit together all the pieces of information I had about Ed... _Him_ and come to the conclusion about what _he_ and _his_ family were.

And now here was another set. I'd been having (and carefully ignoring) this particular series of dreams every night since E..._He_ left me. I was having the running after _him_ dreams, and being totally alone in the forest dreams too; the ones that I woke from screaming every night, causing Charlie to rush in every time to help me settle. But after those dreams, once I'd managed to catch my breath in my hollowed out chest, once I'd calmed my crying jag down to silent tears, once I'd finally fallen back to sleep, this current series of almost painfully clear and sharp dreams would repeat over and over till I woke up feeling drained and as if I'd not slept at all. I knew why. I knew that I needed to focus on the message my subconscious was screaming at me, but I desperately, _desperately_ wanted to ignore them. I couldn't afford to allow them rental space in my head. If I ignored them I could stay in this limbo. I could remain this auto-pilot zombie version of myself, and I could avoid change. This is the important thing now. _Avoid change_. At all costs I must avoid any change in my patterns, my routine. Everything _had_ to remain exactly the same, all day, every day, or everything was lost. But now I was finding that the dreams were forcing themselves into my conscious mind too. Sometimes these days my blank expression wasn't just due to my determination to avoid anything different or interesting that might be going on outside of my own head. Sometimes the empty face I was showing the world was due to the fact that my mind was racing through a series of images, repeating over and over, my subconscious no longer willing to be ignored and _forcing_ its message into my conscious mind. I didn't want to focus on it, damnit; _avoid change, avoid, avoid, avoid!_ But even allowing myself to worry over trying to avoid it was change in itself and try though I might, the zombie state was getting harder and harder to maintain.

Through sheer stubborn force of will, I managed to keep my fingernail grip on "auto-pilot Bella" for a couple more weeks once I'd noticed the waking dream flashes, but then came the second rung on the ladder out of my pit. I woke screaming once again from my nightly alone in the forest dream, to find Charlie slumped next to my bed, not shaking me awake with soothing words as usual, but crying, no, _sobbing_ himself. _My Dad was crying!_ I'd never seen my dad cry before, and the sight actually achieved the impossible, my empty chest seemed to crack and hollow out even more. This was my fault. I'd done this to him. All these weeks I'd been telling myself to avoid change "at all costs" I'd never once considered that I wasn't the only one paying the costs. Selfish, selfish, selfish.

And there it was.

Too late I noticed the change.

I'd switched the auto-pilot off without realising it.

Too late.

I'd made a change.

The battle was over.

I'd lost.

I'd lost _everything_, and I'd hurt my dad for nothing.

I slid off my bed and onto a startled Charlie's lap, flinging my arms around his neck and sobbing wet and snotty breaths into his sleep shirt. I have no idea how long I stayed like that, the pair of us crying into each other's necks before I began to hear a litany of muffled words amongst the sobs "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, Daddy" it wasn't til the "Daddy" at the end there that I'd even realised I was talking out loud. Hell, until the "Daddy" at the end there I was pretty sure I was apologising to either E..._Him_ or possibly even to myself. But no. We'd both of us - _He_ and I - done this to ourselves, no apology needed or deserved. But Charlie? What had he done to deserve this? Nothing. I'd broken him along with myself and the time had come to accept a change or two. Keep them small at first, no need to rush at things and mess things up even more. But the battle was officially lost and now I'd have to face up to the collateral damage. Namely my normally stoic, but despite all that, loving father currently sobbing along with me in a soggy, broken, snotty mess on my bedroom floor.

Yep. That second rung on the ladder out of my pit was a fucking _doozy_!


	3. Chapter 2: Pancakes and Purple DMs

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 2: Pancakes and Purple D.M.s

I don't know how long Charlie and I sat slumped together on the floor like a pair of over used tissues, but the faint light through the window hinted that it had been a couple of hours at least. We were both exhausted, physically, mentally, and emotionally, but I hoped that now that the storm had passed, we could pull ourselves together and begin to rebuild something of what I had destroyed with my selfishness.

I pulled back a little from Charlie, grimacing as my face stuck to his shirt. Pulling my hair back from my face I gave him a half smile.

"Dad?"

"I'm ok, Bells. Are you though?" He asked

"Not yet, no. But I think I'm ready to start trying to be" I answered. I figured honesty was the best policy here. I wasn't going to magically snap back into normality - the pain in my hollowed out chest was a still very real, though slightly dulled - but now I'd finally given up fighting against it, every small step I took back towards living rather than just existing would soothe my still raw soul and begin to shape it anew.

"Well I guess that's the best I could ask of anyone" he said, giving my shoulders one last squeeze. I once again felt a pang or remorse for my selfishness; how bad must things have been for him if _that_ was the best he could ask for?

Groaning from our stiff joints, we both pulled ourselves up off my bedroom floor.

"How about you head off for a shower and I call us both in sick for the day, kid?" Charlie suggested. "I don't think either of us are in a fit state to face the general public after last night." He offered me a rueful smile.

"Ok, Dad" I agreed. "And then while you shower, I'll go down and start tackling breakfast for us both." I offered. Pancakes sound ok to you?" Charlie's eyes widened in shock. I guess neither of us could remember the last time I'd done more at breakfast time than just grab a cereal bar on the way out of the house.

"Sounds like a plan, Bells" he said tentatively, clearly unwilling to question any small sign that I might be making a small improvement. We both just stood there for a moment, an awkward silence building, neither of us knowing quite how to fill it.

"Right, I'll just head to the bathroom then"

"Right, I'll just go make those calls then." We both spoke at the same time, and Charlie shifted awkwardly on his feet.

"Ok, kid. You go do that then." He turned me by my shoulders and gave me a gentle shove in the direction of the bathroom. This had become standard practice over the last few months. A way of ensuring that Zombie Bella was moving in the correct direction for what was needed.

"It's ok, Dad. You don't need to do that anymore." I mumbled, grabbing my shampoo and conditioner, and looking back over my shoulder to give him a gentle smile. Charlie just shrugged a little and headed off downstairs to make the calls.

Stripping out of my clothes once I was in the bathroom, I glanced up in to the cabinet mirror above the sink.

"Gaahh!" I actually took a step back as my reflection registered. My eyes were swollen and bloodshot from the emotional storm of last night, with large bruise-like circles from my chronic disturbed sleep patterns of the last few weeks. My cheeks were sunken from the bird-like appetite I'd had and my skin was an unhealthy greyish colour. Added to all that, my face was smeared with dried snot, and my lank, greasy hair had glued itself to my face in a number of places. I really don't think I could've looked any worse if I tried. No wonder people had been distancing themselves from me at school -of course the autopilot version of Bella hadn't helped any there, but even had I been acting like normal, _I_ would've avoided someone who looked like I did these days. Even without the snot icing I was a horror, and if I smelt even half as bad as I looked... well I wouldn't blame anyone for avoiding _that_. After washing my face in the shower, I quickly lathered up my hair with my strawberry scented shampoo, the familiar smell triggering a memory of E..._Him_ and making the pain in my howlingly empty chest flare again. "_Yeah that definitely still hurts, but it seems a little bit easier than before; I'm not on my knees with the pain, at least. Baby steps at first"_ I cautioned _myself "first step, replace my shampoo and conditioner."_

Finishing up in the shower, I quickly towelled myself off and headed to my room to get dressed, catching the end of Charlie's call.

"No I'm not gonna count my chickens, Billy. But it really seems like she's had a breakthrough." He spoke quietly, but I could still hear him quite clearly as I stood in my towel by my bedroom door. "She seems ready to start getting on with her life again. Starting with cooking pancakes once she's done in the shower." At this, he seemed to suddenly realise that I'd shut the shower off. "Look, she'll be down in a minute. I'll talk to you properly later... Yeah, yeah, I'll see if I can get her to come down with me tomorrow. I guess we're both just gonna spend a bit of quiet time together today...Ok then, Billy. Bye" he hung up the phone and I quickly stepped into my room so things wouldn't be awkward when he came up for his own shower.

Breakfast was a quiet affair, but the silence wasn't uncomfortable this time, both of us seemed content to just run through our own thoughts as we worked our way through the stack of chocolate chip pancakes I'd made. As I stood to clear our plates, Charlie caught my wrist. "Let's just leave the dishes for now, Bells. As we've both got a free day all of a sudden, how about we spend some time together? You get to pick today's activities. Even if all you want to do is watch a movie together or go out for a walk or drive. No need to try for anything too big just now." I gave it some thought. Some fresh air would probably be a good idea. My body needed natural light and some gentle exercise. I wasn't going to suddenly get back to a healthy weight without slowly building up both my appetite and some muscle tone, and even with the usual overcast skies, I could absorb some of the vitamin D my skin was screaming out for. At least after my shower I smelt better, and my hair was looking a little closer to it's old healthy state. Time to start in on the rest of my appearance.

"How about a walk, Dad? Not in the forest!" I quickly amended, slightly panicked as a twinge started in my chest at just the idea. "But how about we drive down to first beach and wander along by the waves? Maybe visit the tide pools if the tide's far enough out?" It seemed like the best option to me; no memories of _Him_ inside the rez, and on a school day the beach was likely to be pretty much deserted, so no-one to gawk at the miraculously resurrected ex zombie like there would be if we wandered around Forks. "You could even bring some fishing gear if you like, so you can try your luck whenever I need to sit and take a break?" I offered, watching Charlie's face light up at the suggestion.

"Sounds like a great plan to me, kid" he said. "You gonna be warm enough, or do you wanna get changed real quick?"

"Umm. Could I maybe borrow one of your plaid shirts and a sweater please, Dad" I murmured " It's just that all my clothes remind me of..."

"Yeah sure. No problems, Bells. I'll just go grab you something" Charlie cut me off quickly mid sentence, not wanting me to put a dent in the meagre progress I'd made today. He ran up the stairs two at a time to grab what I'd asked for and I headed to the utility room to grab a pair of walking boots. It wasn't til I was in there, staring blankly at the boot rack that it occurred to me that I didn't really own any. Tucked away at the back though I spotted a pair of purple Doc Martins with a flower painted on the toe of the left boot. They looked about my size. I pulled them out just as Charlie came in to grab his boots.

"Ha! Yeah those were your mother's. I'd forgotten about those. She practically lived in those for a few months before she suddenly got a thing about going barefoot everywhere. 'Course that only lasted a couple of weeks, then she stepped on some glass in the parking lot outside the grocery store and went back to normal footwear again. She was lucky she lasted that long before she hurt herself. Craziness!" He chuckled under his breath, shaking his head at the memory. The suddenly broke off, looking at me in amazement. I stared back, wondering what his problem was, before I realised I'd been chuckling right along with him. It felt weird, it'd been so long since I'd allowed myself to feel _any_ emotion, let alone _laugh_, but the sound of our laughter blended together was such a warm noise that I swear I could almost feel the warmth against my dry, sallow skin.

"Umm. So it's ok if I use them then, Dad?" I asked, pointing at the purple boots.

"Oh! Yeah of course, Bells, if they're the right size for you, you can keep them. They're not going to do me any good. A million sizes too small, and purple's just _so_ not my colour." He flapped his hands in a camp way and I smiled at his lame joke, wanting to keep this light atmosphere we'd managed to build as long as possible. He handed me one of his shirts, a brown and green plaid flannel one, and a ForksPD zip up hoodie, and I pulled them both on over my tank top. His clothing completely swamped me, coming down past my knees, and needing several turn ups on the sleeves until my hands finally re-appeared, but the faint smell of _Charlie_ that came off them was soothing and made me feel safe and protected. Anyone who did see us out today would struggle to notice exactly how much weight I'd lost, so that was an added bonus. Maybe I'd raid Charlie's closet a bit more often in the future. At least til I was at a better weight.

"So. we good to go?" I asked in a quiet, calm voice, looking up to catch him staring at me once again with a cautiously hopeful expression.

"Yup." He answered. Lets head on out" and we made our way through the house to the front door, me clomping along behind Charlie in Renee's old boots, their stiffness from lack of use making it feel like I was walking in ski boots, rather than Doc Martins. I grabbed a pack of band-aids from the hall drawer on the way past and Charlie raised a brow in question.

"I'll probably get a few blisters til these are broken in. Plus we both know I'm gonna fall down. A lot." He grinned outright at that and pulled me into a one armed side-hug.

"Probably best to be prepared then, kiddo" he said and took the band-aids from me, tucking them into his own pocket. It was my turn to raise a questioning brow, and Charlie threw me a wink. "We also both know that you're gonna land on your ass in a tide pool and then the band-aids would be soaked and useless" he said, chuckling, and again without thinking about it, my own chuckle mingled with his as we walked together out to my truck.


	4. Chapter 3: Dreams and Discussions

**Many thanks to Kids2003 for being my first ever official reviewer, and making it a positive experience too :0)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that like to write for no profit. **

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Chapter 3: Dreams and Discussions

I let Charlie drive us down to First Beach; I guessed he'd be more comfortable that way, and I wanted to take the time to start thinking over the dream that'd been forcing its way from my subconscious to my conscious mind. No point delaying the inevitable, and maybe if I figured it out now, I might manage a few more hours of normal sleep. Well, once the 'Alone In The Forest' dream had had its turn. I was under no illusions that I'd be getting rid of that one for a while. I rubbed at my chest absently, not really realising I was doing it. Actually, thinking about it, I was willing to bet that the nightmare would probably get worse for a while now that I'd accepted the battle was lost. I decided it was probably a good idea to warn Charlie that just because I was taking steps towards normalcy, didn't mean I was going to avoid the _nightmares. "I'll tell him later. No need to sour the good atmosphere just yet"_ I reasoned.

Running the dream sequence through my head, I began to pick apart the separate scenes. This was how I always worked these things through - I'd analyse each scene carefully, filtering out the factual information I knew I'd picked up from the stuff I assumed I'd learned without realising it, and the little leaps of logic that I'd made in between.

The dream always started the same, even if the other scenes changed order on occasion; an ancient version of the La Push rez, no modern buildings, just the traditional wooden longhouses, set a little way back from First Beach. I wouldn't have recognised the place at all, if it were not for catching a glance of James Island just off in the near distance. Though for some reason in my dream state, my mind was labelling the island 'A-Ka-Lat_'. "Ok. So that all gets filed under 'things I've probably read, but forgotten I knew'"_ I thought to myself, moving along through the scene in my mind's eye.

My dream always showed me wearing traditional Quileute clothes, and going about general day to day (well for the period anyway) tasks, all the while wrangling a large group of dark haired and eyed native children who seemed happily intent on making every simple task into a game_. "Hmm. I'm gonna put that in the 'haven't a clue' pile for now." _

Sometimes at this point in my dream I would be weaving something out of dog hair, sometimes I'd be smoking some meat, sometimes tending to a crying infant. The tasks I'd be carrying out we're almost always different, but yet were always very domestic, and they were _always_ violently interrupted by James arriving in the village. Despite the traditional clothing I and everyone else would always be wearing, James always appeared just as I'd last seen him in the dance studio in Phoenix. Greasy, dark blonde ponytail, pale bare chest, leather jacket, worn jeans and bright, violent red eyes. Dream James would grab person after person, breaking necks, biting and sucking down a few mouthfuls of blood, throwing down the body and moving on to the next. Men, old and young, women, and children alike. James clearly didn't care in the least. He killed his way through the village, ignoring the screaming,cursing, and the thrown spears and harpoons. Steadily, murder by murder, working his way towards ... Me.

I breathed carefully through my nose, reminding myself that I couldn't really smell the blood. It was a dream. Not even a dream. A memory of a dream, and it would be a really bad idea to get Charlie worrying about me again this early in our day. _"What the fuck am I trying to tell myself with this scene?" _I thought _"James is definitely dead - I can clearly remember seeing being dismembered and burnt. Even through the venom pain I can remember that much_" I was rubbing at my chest again, the memory drawing my breath tight with hollow pain. _"Careful, Bella, ease back from that memory, focus on the dream instead."_ The warning actually seemed to help and, grateful for the reprieve, I firmly directed my thoughts back to dream James. _"So yes, he's dead. And I may be wrong, but from the way he would talk, I really got the impression he was not old enough to have even been born as a human in the period this dream scene was set, let alone old enough to be a vampire murdering his way through the tribe. Unless maybe I'm using him as a metaphor for any and all human-drinking vampires."_ That actually felt like the right answer to me, so I moved along to the next part of the scene.

I'd always stand firm in my dream, pushing the children behind my body to shield them if I was close enough to them to do so. And dream James would reach out and grab me by my throat, his icy stone hand pulling me close enough to smell the blood on his breath. He'd smirk at me, lean in to my neck, his teeth grazing my skin and as he bit down I would hear feral snarls and loud, rumbling growls, and the crunch of bones breaking. And then the scene would change. _"Those snarls and growls. They're not vampire noises." _I suddenly realised._ "I've heard vampires snarling and growling before, and even noises as ugly as those have a certain musical quality when they come from a vampire. These sound more animal... A bear maybe? Something big, that's for sure. And definitely not coming from James."_ Something else for the 'haven't a clue' pile for now then. Maybe something would click later.

"You ok over there, Bells? You're very quiet." I looked over to see Charlie's face starting to cloud over with the sadly familiar worried expression again.

"Yeah I'm fine, Dad. Just thinking on some stuff. It's not important, it can wait for another time." That felt like a lie. Whatever it was I was trying to tell myself with this dream, I was fairly sure it _was_ important. It always was when it came to _those_ dreams. Also, I was fairly sure it _couldn't_ wait for another time. But I couldn't allow myself to worry Charlie again. I'd have to give the thoughts a little stir now and then through the day and try to keep him from noticing.

"Did you grab your fishing gear and bring it with us, Dad?" I knew he had, I'd heard it banging in the truck bed a few times as we drove along, but I needed to divert him from his worry for a while, and pretty much anything touching on the subject of fishing was almost guaranteed to distract him. He smiled.

"Yeah. I dumped it in the back before we set out. Gonna chuck out a line with your old man this time, kiddo? I'll even bait your hook for you as I know you're not good with that." I remembered being a little kid, getting dizzy and passing out right into the river while trying to bait my own hook.

"Ok then, Dad. But I'm holding you to that offer. The sea'll be far too cold to pass out into." He clearly remembered the incident too as he chuckled at me, his moustache twitching in his amusement at the memory. Charlie liked to sit pretty much in silence when he fished. That would give me some more time to pick at the threads of this dream and see what came out of the tangle.

We pulled up into a parking spot close to the beach, and Charlie opened his door to climb out.

"We're not parking by Billy's today?" I asked. We always had in the past. Billy lived close enough to the beach that it made just as much sense to park there as anywhere else, plus it gave Charlie an excuse to check in with his best friend.

"Not today. I figured it'd be better if we kept to ourselves today. Keep some privacy to talk about stuff and work out what to do." He gave me a steady look, gauging my reaction. He was clearly stepping carefully through the minefield I'd sown over the last couple of months, whilst holding firm to his resolution that we really needed to talk things out. I swallowed against the lump in my throat brought on by my sorrow for what I'd been putting him through. No-one should be afraid to speak to someone they love in case it sends them over the edge. He mis-read my swallow as a nervous reaction and his eyes softened. "It's ok, Bells. We'll take it slow and steady. Just generalities, no specifics, no names, no memories. Ok?"

I tried for a reassuring smile. And missed it by a country mile, judging by his answering expression. He opened his mouth to reassure me again, but I jumped in quickly.

"It's fine, Dad. You're right. There's stuff we should talk over and I'll make sure to tell you if we start approaching something I'm not ready to discuss. Will that work ok?" He blew out a relieved breath I hadn't known he was holding.

"Sounds like a good plan, kiddo. Now lets get this walk underway, shall we? If we time things right, we can hit the diner mid-way along the beach just after the lunch rush, and I'll run in and grab something for us to eat on the beach." I nodded in agreement and he grabbed his fishing box and two poles from the truck bed before giving a jerk of his head to show me the way down to the beach.

For once it wasn't raining, although the wind was pretty fierce, whipping my hair around my face and making me wish I'd thought to braid it before we left. I pulled up the hood on the sweater I'd borrowed from Charlie, and breathed in the homely scent of him as it settled around my face. We'd only been walking for a few minutes when Charlie decided to grab the bull by the horns and began.

"So, Bells, I'm not quite sure where to start with all of this but I guess the best thing to do is just say what's on my mind and if I'm pushing too far you tell me." He stopped us in our tracks, stood in front of me and ducked down to make eye contact with me under my hood. "But I do mean you need to _tell_ me, kiddo, ok? You _can't_ just shut down and block me out if you can't answer, or if I strike a nerve or something. You just can't do that again. I don't think either of us will be able to take that again." I nodded solemnly, my eyes welling a little at the raw emotion in his voice.

"I promise, Dad, I won't ever do that to you again." He opened his mouth to speak and I jumped in again "and I won't do it to myself again either." Charlie gave a satisfied nod and turned to start walking again, with me continuing along at his side.

"It just seemed like you were completely empty inside, Bella" he murmured, barely audible over the wind. "It wasn't like someone had left, it was like someone had _died_. Like _you_ had died along with them." He turned to see how I was taking this and I took a deep breath, trying to re-inflate my empty chest which was aching anew at his words, letting the breathe whoosh out again I fought to keep my voice from breaking as I said

"Yeah that seems a pretty fair comparison. That's how it felt." I was determined not to lie to him. Too many times in the last year I'd been forced to lie to him for his own protection and I'd hated it every time. I needed to find a way to word this so he could understand that I hadn't just been throwing an epic, award winning teenage tantrum, but without exposing him him to things that he couldn't know about. That he _mustn't_ know about for his own safety. I also needed to walk a fine line between avoiding the issue completely and preventing the void in my chest from breaking me open completely.

"I know that people often throw the term 'heartbroken' around, so much so that it's pretty much lost its real meaning. But Dad, it really physically felt that mine was completely shattered. No, worse, it was gone completely. Like my chest was completely empty, even of my lungs, and it wasn't just a person I was missing, but my own vital organs. I couldn't _breathe!"_ I wrapped my arms about myself, holding myself together as the pain once more threatened. We walked on in silence for a while as he processed what I had said. I didn't really expect him to actually understand it. From an outside perspective I knew it would just sound like melodrama - Hell before all this, if I'd heard someone talking like this I'd have rolled my eyes and written them off as a drama queen - but it was the best way to describe it without either getting too specific and saying something that ripped the wound open again, or giving him too much information he shouldn't have.

After a few more minutes he spoke again, quietly. "And now?" He asked "is it better now? Cos I see you holding your chest as you walk, like you're worried your ribs are going to spring open, and I'm guessing you do that for a reason."

"And now it's... Heading towards starting to feel a little less painful." I winced internally at how weak that was. A few breadcrumbs, liberally sprinkled with caveats. I tried again, looking for a more positive way of explaining where I'm at. "I'm trying to make myself take steps in the right direction, but you should know, Dad, that I'm not going to just wake up tomorrow, or next week, or maybe even next month and say 'There. All better now. Time to be normal again.' I mean I _want_ to get back to myself again, but it not going to be a simple fix. I guess I'm sort of looking at it like a building project; There's a lot of damage there that needs repairing on the structural side, and then I'll need to start working on the fixtures and fittings." I grabbed at my hood as a big gust of wind tried to rip it away from my face. "I guess the decor could use a little work too." I added ruefully, holding my arms out and gesturing at my current outfit. He gave me a half smile at my bad joke and reached out to gently squeeze my shoulder.

Once again we wandered along in silence, Charlie seemingly absorbing what I'd been saying, and me absorbing that strange calm I often feel when walking along this beach. I guessed it was the combination of the raging wild thunder of the waves on one side as I walked, and the almost eerie stillness of the forest on the other that always made me feel right at the centre of a see saw. Standing at the perfect balance point of nature; turbulence and peace at either end. _"This was a good place to have come today" _I thought to myself _"I can think more clearly here. Maybe I can find a quiet spot to use regularly. I could certainly use a place that's quiet, free of memories and full of fresh air._" I looked about me more carefully, spotting a few hundred yards away a small hollow just on the edge of the beach, where a small tree had blown over, pulling it's roots out of the ground, creating a sort of natural three sided shelter looking out to sea. Yeah I'd definitely be coming back here.

About a quarter of a mile past the tree root shelter, Charlie stopped and looked out to sea. "This seems like a good spot to throw out a couple of lines, kid" he suggested, nodding towards the cluster of rocks that were just becoming exposed as the tide withdrew. I nodded in agreement, although, honestly, I couldn't see what made this spot any better than any other random point along our walk so far. But Charlie was the expert so if he thought this was a good place then I guess it was. He busied himself baiting our lines and casting for both of us and then handed me my pole. He stayed quiet for another ten minutes or so, then finally spoke without turning to look at me.

"I know you think I don't understand how you feel, Bells. But I kinda think that maybe I do. What you were describing; that feeling like your heart and lungs had been removed, I've felt that myself. Like someone's gutted you like a prize trout for cooking, but somehow you're still alive, no matter how much pain you're in." I turned to stare at him in shock.

He was right.

He did get it.

That was pretty close to how I feel.

Seeing the shock on my face he explained. "That's how it was when your mother left. Her taking you with her too just made it worse." I used my over long sleeve to brush away the tear running silently down my cheek and drew in a long shuddering breath. Charlie continued "But, Bells, no matter how much pain I was in, I couldn't let myself give in to it cos I knew if I let go of myself that I wouldn't be in a fit state to see my little girl the next time I had a chance. I know you don't have that same sort of thing to hold on to like I did - spending time with you whenever I could and talking to you on the phone was my lifeline - but maybe you could let your old man return the favour and be something you can hold on to while you do all your 'building work'?"

My hands were shaking, and Charlie grabbed my pole from me before I could drop it and lose it to sea, pulling me with one arm into his safe warm chest and letting me rest my forehead against it as I struggled to pull in ragged breaths. I fought against the tears, refusing to return to the night before's soggy mess and slowly regained control over my breathing. "You're right, Dad, maybe that's what I really need." I agreed once I was able to talk. "I've been so selfish, focusing only on what I was feeling and completely failing to see what effect it was having on you. I was so desperate not to change anything, in case He ..." I broke off, not able to complete that statement without completely losing it, but hoping that Charlie would know what I was trying to say. He did, I could see the understanding in his eyes when I looked up at him "So I willingly let myself further into the nothing, kept myself there without taking even a second to think that maybe I was dragging anyone else down with me and I'm so sorry, Daddy, so, so sorry that I did this to you, to _both of us_ but you know you've already returned the favour." He frowned in confusion. "It was realising how much I'd hurt you that made me start to pull myself out." I explained. "You've already been a lifeline for me and the fact that you're braving all this emotional stuff with me, _for_ me, when we both know that it's the furthest thing from your comfort zone means so much more to me than I explain." The corner of his mouth twitched as I acknowledged how far out of character he'd been acting today, and the fact that I knew he was forcing himself to do it because he knew I _needed_ it.

"Hmm well just as long as I don't need to do it again for another 18 years." He grumbled half heartedly, allowing me the out I'd created. We both needed a breather from the intense atmosphere surrounding us so I just added one last thing before wrapping my arms around him in a quick but crushing hug_ "Never again_. I already promised."


	5. Chapter 4: Sex and Sacrifice

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 4: Sex and Sacrifice

After our talk, Charlie and I lapsed into a comfortable silence, me sitting on a small rock on his leeward side, taking what shelter I could from the wind. He seemed relieved, whether it was because he felt hope that things were genuinely going to improve, or because he was simply glad that the emotional conversation was over and he could return to his usual stoic nature, I couldn't tell. For myself I'd be glad to have him back to the way I was used to him being. For one because it would mean he was no longer anxious over my emotional and mental state, but also because since I'd moved to live with him, I'd grown to really love and appreciate his particular way of demonstrating his love for me; the welcome home present of the truck, the clunky old dinosaur of a computer in my room, the chains already fitted on my tyres on icy days, all spoke of his quiet but real love for me, and in a way they spoke louder than the words that Renee would use to express the same thing several times a day. I supposed that in my own way I had, before my birthday anyway, demonstrated my own love for him in similar ways; cooking and cleaning and taking care of him the best I could. I guessed we really were much more alike than I had realised.

Seeing that he was fishing contentedly, I decided now was a good time to turn my thoughts back towards the unpicking of my dream. I still had hopes that if I managed to get to grips with whatever it was I was trying to let my conscious mind know, I might actually get a little reprieve from that dream at least.

I scanned quickly through my thoughts, trying to find the lost thread that I was picking at when Charlie interrupted my analysis _earlier. "Ah yes, that was it. The strange bear-like growls and snarls and the bone crunching noises which always come at the end of that scene as it blacks out."_ I once again mentally compared the noises to the growls and hisses I'd heard before from vampires. They were clearly very different, but no matter how I twisted and turned the idea in my head, I simply couldn't imagine why my subconscious mind considered a bear being present to be of any importance. A bear was no defence against a vampire; I know for a fact that some members of the C... _Cullen_ family found them to be their favourite meal. The mention, even in my head of the family name caused another twinge in my chest, but a much duller one than previously. The family leaving me was upsetting in and of itself. To be considered a sister/daughter by them and then to be abandoned without a word was a painful experience, but it had been driven home to me in the last twelve hours just how much my own flesh and blood truly meant to me, and I to him, so the loss of the Cullen family would soon become something I regretted, but not something to grieve excessively over. _"Enough poking at bruises to see if they still hurt." _I cautioned myself._ "Back to the matter at hand... So the bear attacking was going to have to go into the 'haven't a clue' pile too. Hmm. That pile is growing a bit too quickly for my liking."_

After the 'James attacks the village' scene faded to black each night, the other three scenes which somehow formed part of the same dream would repeat in random order.

In one, I was once again in the same ancient Quileute village, and much of the scene was similar to the first, but instead of it being James attacking, it was Victoria. She always seemed to be in such a rage that she barely seemed sane. Striking about her indiscriminately, and not even taking the trouble to feed from her kills. Dream Victoria would be, just as dream James had been, dressed much as I last saw her, in modern clothes, but there the resemblance to the vampire I met at the baseball clearing ended. Her long red hair no longer flowing freely about her shoulders, but snarled up, almost in dreadlocks, it was so tangled, and full of dirt, leaves and twigs. Her face was always fixed in a feral snarl, and her bright red eyes insane with anger as they met mine. She would tear her way through the village, slaughtering tribe members as she went, and I always had the feeling that she was merely cutting down the weeds in her single-minded path to kill me in particular. My dream self would pull a sharp looking belt knife out and, looking Victoria in the eye, would plunge it deep into my own chest; the scent of the blood drawing her away from her indiscriminate killing as she would leap straight at me and then once again darkness would draw the scene to a close. Remembering this scene had my hands trembling and I forced them between my knees as I sat there, trying to disguise the shaking from Charlie.

_"Well this one doesn't need a genius to work out." _I thought to myself._ "It's clear that the message here is Victoria will be back to avenge James, and she won't care in the slightest how much collateral damage is done while she carries out her vendetta." _This little fact now seemed so glaringly obvious that I was amazed that neither myself, nor any of the Cullens had thought of it before._ "Well maybe they had, but they didn't care enough about me to stick around and offer me their protection." _The thought popped into my head before I could stop it, and it was all I could do to keep myself from hyperventilating as I stubbornly refused to give in to the pain and panic that came with the idea. _"Oh God. Charlie would be the collateral damage if I'm right and she does come back. I can't let him be hurt or killed because of me."_ Knowing this, and being only too aware that I'd have no one around capable of protecting me gave me only two choices when the time came and Victoria returned: I couldn't let Charlie be killed any more than I could've let Renee be killed when I thought James had her in Phoenix, so I had to either try to lure her out to the forest or the beach, somewhere away from Charlie so he won't be involved, or run out on Charlie, get as far away as possible, and try to live in hiding for as long as I can, probably putting everyone I come across in my travels in the path of danger until she finally finds me and kills me.

Both of these options were heartbreaking, mainly due to the fact that each would leave Charlie all alone again, and either dealing with funeral arrangements or leading a search for his missing daughter. I hated the thought of either choice, but I guessed that I owed it to Charlie to at least _try_ to stay alive as long as possible, so it looked like when the time came I already had a two stage plan ready and waiting. First try to run and hide, and then, if that failed, lure her to me somewhere alone to get it over with, without getting anyone else hurt. Despite not believing in a higher power myself, I found myself silently praying that Victoria wouldn't make her reappearance for a long, long time so I could have as long as possible with Charlie.

I pressed stubbornly onward with my dream analysis, turning my thoughts towards what I actually found the most disturbing of the scenes I was being haunted by. It was by no means the most violent of the scenes, but it was the most detailed, so much so that I could _feel_ what was happening as well as see and hear it. It was, not to put too fine a point on it, a sex scene. One not unworthy of appearing in a soft porn movie and I found it more distressing than the violence of the James scene and the Victoria scene because, inexperienced though I was with anything more sexual than a few closed mouthed kisses, I _enjoyed_ it. It was _hot_! It was also more disturbing because I was troubled that my mind could invent something like this; not just a straight, vanilla, missionary, romantic lovemaking but rough, animalistic, dominant/submissive _fucking_. In this part of the dream a naked woman, face turned so I couldn't see it, but who I could only assume was me, based on the fact that I could feel everything as it happened, was kneeling on all fours, body and mahogany hair drenched in sweat as a large man, his face also obscured, took her roughly from behind. The moans and gasps, the glistening bodies, the straining of the man's large muscular body as he pounded into the woman, all combined to make the scene incredibly erotically charged, and even now, sitting here on a cold, windy, damp beach, _next to my Dad, for fuck's sake_, I felt my body react with the memory of it; my panties becoming damp and tingles spreading through my lower regions.

In the dream the man wound his hand into the woman's sweat slick hair and roughly grabbed a fistful, yanking her back into his thrusts by it, and then pushing her head forward in submission as he sank his teeth into the back of her neck._ "Guess this is another one for the ever growing 'haven't a clue' pile."_ I thought wryly to myself. I mean it was clear what the scene was about - sex. But _why_? And why and how the fuck had I managed to come up with such wild and rough a sex scene? Not that I never thought about sex - I was (or I was before my birthday anyway) a healthy young woman, with normal drives in that area and I had experimented with masturbation just like anyone else. And while doing that I had usually been imagining various sex acts. But they were always very gentle, loving acts, much more romantic than animalistic, and I couldn't fathom where this almost violent scene had come from in my imagination, and why even just the memory of it had me so... Well ... _Horny_.

_"Huh. Guess I've got a side of kink to me that I never knew about"_ I mentally snorted at the concept. It wasn't something I'd ever be likely to get the chance to explore, so why was my subconscious trying to force me to accept the thought so determinedly? _"Ok, not really made any progress on that one then. Better try the last scene and see where that one gets me."_ I decided.

The remaining scene was actually the one that required the least working out, but it despite this I still couldn't see why my weird brain was so insistent that I focus on it. It was barely a scene at all. Just a few seconds of images of a large black wolf, running through the forest until it broke through the trees on the edge of La Push, where it came to stand next to me, staring out across the ocean, completely unconcerned by the wild animal at my side. _"So why a wolf then? I why aren't I scared of it?"_ I wondered.

I began to search my memory for any information I might have learned over the years about wolves. As I ran my thoughts this way and that way, my gaze drifted along the beach until I was stopped short by the sight of a driftwood tree. The tree where Jacob Black and I had sat when I had plied my pitiful flirting techniques to pry his tribe's legends out of him. I was suddenly struck by a clear memory _"the cold ones are the natural enemy of the wolf - well, not the wolf, really, but the wolves that turn into men, like our ancestors._"***** Jacob had named them werewolves, but I knew from the conversation I'd had with Ca... With Carlisle, while he stitched up my arm on my birthday, that there were no werewolves left on this continent. He had mentioned briefly a clan of shape shifters who were also extinct now, and I wondered if the wolves Jacob spoke of might have been closer to that species. The hollow pain in my chest once more warned me that following that memory of Carlisle right now would really not be a good idea. I'd have to re-visit it another time, when I was hopefully able to think on it without pain, so I re-focused on Jacob's _legends. "So did the tribe's legend refer to shape shifters who could become wolves? Is that why I was seeing the wolf scene?"_ I asked myself. A overwhelming feeling of _right_ came over me. I was sure I'd hit on an answer. And, now that I had one answer, something from my "haven't a clue" pile leapt to the front of my mind; "_Those bear noises. They're not bear noises at all. They're shape shifter wolf noises!" _Again the feeling of _right_ came over me and I was positive I'd solved another part of my puzzle.

I was so lost in thought, that when Charlie spoke I actually jumped a little and slid off the rock I was sitting on, bruising my ass as I landed.

"Coming up on lunchtime, Bells. Wanna reel these lines in and walk a bit further til we reach the diner?" He snorted with repressed laughter as I did my clumsy ass-plant off the rock.

"Sure, Dad. That sounds great. I replied, pulling myself awkwardly to my feet from where I'd landed and brushing myself down. He pulled in both the fishing lines and we began a slow wander further down the beach, me limping a little from my slip, and from the blisters on both heels which the purple boots were creating.

When we got to where the little diner sat by the beach, Charlie ran in to grab us both something, and I sat on the little wall that bordered the parking lot, busying my hands with applying band-aids to my blisters, as I turned my new revelations over in my mind, like a cow chewing the cud. _"So the extinct clan of shape shifters were part of the Quileute tribe, their animal forms were wolves, and according to Jacob they were the natural enemies of vampires, which would explain why I could hear them snarling in the background in both the James and Victoria dream scenes."_ For a third time that feeling of _right_ bathed me in a warm glow. With any luck, these parts of the recurrent dream would not be bothering me anymore now that my conscious mind had accepted what I'd been trying to tell myself.

_"I also realise that it's inevitable that Victoria will come back looking to avenge her mate, and that I'm going to have to sacrifice myself to keep Charlie safe."_ Swallowing against the fear, and against the sorrow of knowing how it would pain Charlie when he lost me, I waited for the warm _right_ feeling to soothe me, but it never came. All I had instead was that feeling of 'nearly but not quite' that you get when you know you're close to an answer, but you're missing something to complete it. _"Looks like I'll be having at least that part of the dream again." _I thought_ "And probably the kinky porn too, cos I can't work out what the fuck that has to do with anything either."_ There was something tickling in the back of my brain about that scene though. I thought it might be something Carlisle had said on my birthday, while he was treating my arm, but the twinge in my chest warned me once more that I just wasn't ready to make myself remember anything about that evening with any clarity. It was going to have to wait a while.

Charlie came out just as I was finishing tugging the laces tight on my boots, with a couple of burgers and large styrofoam cups of steaming coffee, and I firmly set the dream analysis on the back burner for the rest of my day. I'd done enough for now, and it was time to focus on getting things back on track with my dad. We sat companionably, side by side on the low wall as we tucked into our lunch. It was the first time I'd been hungry in months, and Charlie looked happy and relieved as he saw me tearing large mouthfuls out of my sandwich. I gave him a ketchup and mustard laced smile. _"Well that's emotional sharing, fresh air, exercise, dream analysis, eating, and quality time with Charlie. It's been a hell of a day so far, and it's only lunchtime."_

*Twilight, pg 107


	6. Chapter 5: Bruises and Band-Aids

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 5: Bruises and Band-Aids

After lunch, Charlie and I headed back along the beach towards the tide pools. It had taken quite a bit, but I'd not only managed to talk him out if more fishing, but I'd even managed to get him to leave his fishing gear behind at the diner. We'd run into a friend of his, Harry Clearwater, and after a bit of fast talking from me, Charlie had asked him to keep the gear in his truck til we came by to collect it at Billy Black's later on.  
We headed back off down the beach towards the tide pools I had loved so much as a child, talking together about the various trips we had made down there on my summer visits.  
"So, Dad, are we going to stop in and catch up with Billy and Jacob when we grab your fishing gear?" I asked Charlie, wondering how much strain I'd put on his and Billy's friendship during my auto pilot phase. "It fine if you want to. I know you've probably not spent much time with him for the last few months, so it might be good for you two to have a proper catch up. I ca hang out with Jacob like in the old days, but without the mud pies." I suggested with a little half grin at the memory. Part of me was wondering if I might be able to gently pry a little more information of the Quileute legends out of Jacob, hopefully without Billy noticing; I hadn't forgotten that Billy had made it clear he knew exactly what the Cullens were, and had strongly disapproved of me having anything to do with them. The last thing I needed was to have him overhear me digging into another are of the supernatural.  
Charlie gave me an appraising look.  
"Well I don't know, Bells. You sure you're ready for that? I don't want you to push yourself too hard. We can take things as slow as you'd like, kiddo." He gently squeezed my shoulder, getting me to turn and look at him.  
"It's fine, Dad. Really." I assured him. "I'm not saying I'm suddenly all better. Hell I'm pretty sure I'll still be having the nightmares for a while yet, and I'm definitely not ready to even think about certain things, let alone talk about them. But I can handle a bit of time with Billy and Jacob. Just as long as they aren't badgering me about stuff. We should go say hello. Maybe stay for a bit while you and Billy catch up. Maybe it'll help me to have a little extra company, and Jacob's a good kid. He always used to make me smile. I'll be fine." He silently and steadily gazed into my face for a moment. I'm not sure what he was looking for there, but apparently he found it, because he finally nodded.  
"Ok then, kid. If you think you'll be fine, we'll give it a try." His face turned very firm. "But if you start to feel overwhelmed, you need to let me know straight away, and we'll head straight home. No need to push yourself too hard." I nodded solemnly in agreement.  
"Sure, Dad. No problem." I said, and we carried on walking down to the tide pools.  
We spent a good couple of hours there, stepping from rock to rock and peering into the water, through the drifts of seaweed to the bottom, pointing out crabs and tiny fish to each other. I fell down so many times I lost count, and each and every time was accompanied by Charlie struggling to hold in his snorts of laughter once he'd checked I was uninjured. Three band-aids, a hole in my jeans, a fresh crop of bruises on my ass, and several total soakings later, we noticed the tide getting close and called it a day, heading back along the beach, past the diner, my new overturned tree sheltering spot, and onwards to the truck where we had left it in the parking lot.  
"You still sure about going to Billy's?" Charlie checked. "Cos I can always collect my fishing gear from Harry tomorrow instead, and we could just head home for piazza, a shower and bed, if you're not sure." I shook my head.  
"No really, Dad, it's fine. Although maybe I'll ask Jacob if I can raid his closet for some dry, warm clothes of the non-ripped variety" I joked, tugging at my cold wet jeans. I always hated wet denim, the way it clung to my skin and chafed was unbelievably uncomfortable.  
"Ok then, kiddo. Let's do it then." He said, going round to the driver's side and pulling out my keys to unlock the truck.  
"Hey, Chief!" A deep voice called out from behind us on the path, and we both turned to see who was coming. The owner of the voice was a tall, a _very_ tall Quileute man with cropped hair and a bare chest, wearing just shorts. Not even any shoes. _"Jeeze, he must be mad, it's so cold today and he's out wandering about like it's high summer in the Bahamas!"_ I thought to myself, although I couldn't help but be impressed by his physique. My eyes ran over his naked upper body, taking it all in. The guy had an eight pack, and incredibly well defined chest and arm muscles. _"I guess with a body like that, you take any chance you can to show it off."_ I was aware of Charlie clearing his throat loudly.  
"Hmm?" I murmured, tearing my eyes away from the guy to look at Charlie, who was rolling his eyes at me with a mixture of exasperation and amusement. "Sorry, Dad, I sort of zoned out there for a moment. Did you say something?"  
Charlie's moustache twitched "Yes, Bells. I was just asking you if you remembered Sam here. Sam Uley." Charlie shifted his feet awkwardly. "He's the one who... Erm... Found you. You know _that night._" He said carefully.  
Pain.  
Burning, freezing, tearing, echoing pain.  
Agony.  
Nothing else existed.  
As I struggled to drag in a breath with absent lungs, the edges of my vision blurred and darkened, and I was vaguely aware of Charlie and Sam shouting to me, I couldn't understand the words, but that didn't matter. Nothing did for that moment. As I felt my knees buckle under me and a strong, large, hot pair of hands grab me under my arms and swing me up into equally hot arms, I had a sharp memory of being carried from the forest and for a second I thought I was back there again, and the last few months had been a terrible, vivid dream.  
"Oh shit no. Not now. She was coming back, she was doing better, damnit. Please, please no. Not again. Please Bells, please, kiddo, don't go back inside your head again. Just breathe. Come back to me. You promised. You _promised_ you wouldn't do this to yourself again. To _me_ again. Please, Hun. _Please_"

Charlie's words started to cut through my agony, and I struggled to hold on to them. To hold onto _him_, he was my lifeline and I grabbed hold, following his broken voice back to reality and away from the yawning pit I had been tumbling towards. He was right. I _had_ promised, and I _refused_ to break that promise. If I was going to have to leave him for his own safety once Victoria returned, the least I could do for him was to actually be _present_ during the time we had left together, and not lost at the bottom of that abyss. If I had limited time left, I was going to make the most of it, for both of us. I was going to _live_ not simply _exist_. With a will I didn't know I had, I snatched hold of my panicked breathing and slowly and carefully forced it back to a normal pattern. I could feel the familiar bench seat of my truck underneath my back and I squeezed the warm, but not hot, hand I now felt in my own.  
"That's it, kid, come on back. Slow, even breaths. You can do it. Steady yourself, Bells. I'm right here. Not going anywhere. Take your time." Charlie's voice was steady but slightly cracked, calm laced over barely controlled panic, and I used the regret I felt over worrying him once again to push away the pain from my chest.  
Opening my eyes a few moments later, I was was met not by eyes that matched mine, but a deeper, darker brown pair, underneath a strong, worry creased brow. _"Who the fu... Oh yeah. Sam."_ I reminded myself, and I cast my own eyes about to find Charlie sitting next to me.  
"It's ok. I'm ok, Dad. I'm sorry." I whispered. "It just took me by surprise and got away from me for a moment there, but it's ok now. I've got it locked back up again." That was how I visualised it in my mind. Sort of like a room with a huge pit in the floor, wanting and waiting to suck me back down if I made the wrong move. But my determination to change things had put a door on the room. Not a very strong one yet, but hopefully it would grow stronger, and I had a good, sturdy lock on the handle.  
"Nothing to be sorry about, Bells. You're doing great, just stay right there for a few more minutes til you're completely ready to sit up." He said, and I nodded and went back to regulating my breathing. _"Shit. Can't let that happen again. I was far too close to falling."_  
Within a few more minutes I was ready to sit up, and those large, hot hands were back to help me. "Thanks, Sam." I mumbled with embarrassment. "I'm sorry about that. Probably not the response you get from most girls huh?" I tried to joke, instantly regretting it and blushing bright red _"Good one, Bella. Way to sound like a squealing fangirl."_  
The corner of Sam's mouth curled upwards a tiny bit and the furrows in his brow smoothed a little. "Not to worry, Bella. I'm not quite sure what I did to freak you out back there, but I'm really sorry. Are you going to be ok?" He asked.  
"It was nothing." I replied, and at his look of shocked disbelief I added "I mean you did nothing to freak me out. I was just hit with some bad memories and they kind of ripped my breath away for a few minutes. Not your fault. "  
"Ahh. Ok I understand." He said and squeezed my knee in reassurance. "Memories can be tough to fight through sometimes." I sent him a questioning glance and he waved me off with one hand. "Anyway, enough about that. Are you feeling a bit better now? I was just heading back home, but if you or the Chief need something...?" Both Charlie and I shook our heads "No, no, we're good." We both spoke at the same time, and I felt a tiny smile on my face as I glanced over at him in amusement.  
"You go on, Sam." Charlie added. "Me and Bells here will just sit for a bit til we're both ready to head out of here." Sam reached across me to shake Charlie's hand.  
"Ok Chief, if you're sure then." As he pulled back he seemed to sniff at me, his nostrils flaring and his brow creasing again, but it was over before I really had time to take note, so I wrote it off as my imagination. "Bye then, Bella, Chief." He nodded once at each of us. "See you about sometime." With that he turned and jogged off back down the path. _"Ahh. Out jogging along the beach. I guess that explains the shorts and lack of shirt or shoes."_ I thought to myself absently, pulling my hair back away from my face, _"Probably goes part of the way to explaining that physique too. Exercise freak I expect."_ I turned to face Charlie in the driver's seat. "I really am sorry about that, Dad. It just happened so quickly, I couldn't catch it before it got away from me."  
"It's ok, kid." He reassured me, gently rubbing my back. "You feeling ready to drive home now?" He asked.  
"Home? No, we're going to Billy's first." I reminded him.  
"But I thought that after that little incident you'd rather just skip it and head back home instead." Charlie said, confused.  
"No really, Dad. I'm ok now. It's all locked back up again, and besides, I really need to go into the store on the way home, and I'd rather not look like I've been rolling around in the tide pools when I go there. It'll also give me a little more time to pull myself back together before we bump into someone in the store." He nodded in agreement.  
"Ok then, kiddo. I'm going to take you at your word. But the first sign you show of needing to get out of there, then we're off." He aid firmly and I gave him a tiny smile.  
"Sure, Dad. No problem." He turned the key and with the familiar loud roar, my truck turned over and we headed off to the Black's place.  
At Billy's house, Charlie turned to me and gave me an assessing look. "You sure?" I was a little exasperated with him for asking again, but I guessed I couldn't blame him. He'd gone from heartbroken despair, to cautious hope, to awkward emotional sharing, to slightly less cautious hope and then back to despair again, all the the space of a single day. I couldn't blame him for wanting to be careful with me so neither of us had to go through anymore for today at least. "_Fuck. Has it really only been one day?" _I thought with wonder._ "Today has felt at least a week long. I should probably take the next few days a bit slower. No point rushing things and then having it all fall apart on me."_  
"Definitely sure. Lets get in there before they wonder what's up. They've got to have heard this beast pull up." I gestured vaguely at the truck with a small smile and he nodded and opened his door.  
"Ok then, kiddo, lets go."

Jacob opened the door before we got there and I turned and raised my eyebrow at Charlie. He snorted and said "Yeah yeah, you were right." under his breath before he raised his voice for Jacob to hear. "Hey there, Jake. Bells and I thought we'd just stop in for a bit as we were on the Rez. It ok to come in, or are you and Billy busy?" Jacob grinned easily at us and called over his shoulder. "Dad, there's a couple of palefaces out here. Do I let them in, or shall I run them off our land?" I found myself smiling gently at his light-hearted teasing, and when I heard Billy's voice call out for us to come in, I ducked under Jacob's arm as he held the door and poked him in the ribs as I passed, making him squirm as I hit one of his ticklish spots I'd remembered from when we were kids. Suddenly I realised I'd not had to duck very much to pass under his arm and I stepped back a little in the cramped hallway to get a better look at him. "Jeeze Jake. You been standing in a bag of fertiliser every night?" I gestured to his height as he looked at me, a little confused. "They say steroids mean that the growth isn't... Well... Proportional you know. I pointed at his junk, blushing a bit as I made the innuendo, regretting mentioning his "little Jacob"almost immediately. The outright laugh I heard from behind me changed my mind immediately. If I could make Charlie laugh like that, when I knew damn well he hadn't had a true moment of joy for the last few months, it was worth stepping out of my usual reserved character once in a while if that was the result. Noting Jacob's blushing cheeks at my jibe and Charlie's laugh, I stepped into the living room where I found Billy staring at me in astonishment.

"Bella?" He said, his eyes wide as he took in the small smile on my blushing face and the grin on Charlie's. "Hey there kid. How you doing?"  
I looked down to my purple DMs, embarrassed now, and not sure quite how to answer. "Fine" would be a lie "Trying to dig myself out of my selfish self destruction" while true, sounded far too melodramatic.  
"I'm... Working on it, but yeah, a little better." I settled with that, and, relieved at his understanding nod, I crossed the room and went to sit on the couch.  
"Umm Bells, I wouldn't do that. Unless you want Billy bitching about water stains on his furniture" Charlie warned me, reminding me in perhaps the most embarrassing way possible that my ass was filthy and soaked. Jacob burst out laughing, and the blush that had just sprung up at Charlie's words grew steadily deeper.  
"Had an accident, Bells?" Jacob taunted me. "Thought that you were too old for that." I scowled at him and narrowing my eyes, replied with as much dignity as I could muster "No, _Baby Jake_, I did not. I just fell down at the tide pools. A few times." Not even my use of his old hated nickname could prevent Jacob's roar of laughter, and as it was joined by Billy's and Charlie's, I gave up my tenuous hold on my dignity, and rolled my eyes. "Fine. Laugh at the clumsy girl, why don't you all? While you're trying to get yourself under control, may I borrow a pair of sweat pants or something, please? I'm freezing over here." Still laughing, Jacob nodded and led the way to his room, where he grabbed a pair of sweats from his closet and handed them to me. He wandered back off to the living room, still chuckling away at my expense, and I closed to door behind him and began the tricky task of unlacing my wet boots, and peeling the wet denim off my freezing body. Once I'd finally got myself into the sweats, rolled them up at the waist and the ankles, so I didn't trip over them as I walked, and snagged myself a pair of dry socks from Jacobs dresser, I quietly opened the door and padded, boots in hand, down the hall to the living room.

The voices stopped me just as I was about to enter the room however. They clearly hadn't heard me coming back, and were talking about me in hushed tones.  
"I don't know what to tell you, Billy." I heard Charlie murmur. "We had a bit of a breakthrough early this morning, and she seems to have found a last reserve of strength to start pulling herself back together. It's not going to be a miracle sudden cure or anything, we've already had a couple of 'wobbly moments'" I didn't even need to see Charlie to know that he had just used giant air quotes around that phrase "but she's found some determination from somewhere, and I think she's finally on the mend." I heard Billy's wheelchair creak as he moved, and I peeked through the crack of the door to see what he was doing. He'd rolled himself a bit closer to Charlie and was gripping his shoulder firmly.  
"So glad to hear that, my old friend. We've all been worried about her, and also about you. And that was without having seen her. _Jeeze_, Charlie, she's all skin and bones and I thought she was pale before, but now? Hell, she's almost transparent." Charlie nodded helplessly.  
"She's only been eating when I pretty much force it on her, and I think she's only getting an hour or two's urn disturbed sleep every night. Also, I've been struggling to get her in the shower at all unless I lead her there, and hold her up and wash her myself. Talk about awkward. If it hadn't been so heart breaking, I'd have laughed at myself having to deal with that!" He admitted in a broken voice, adding, when Jacob and Billy gave an appalled gasp, "But today she not only voluntarily showered by herself and washed her hair, but _she cooked breakfast, ate a smallish portion with me, suggested a walk on the beach, talked a few things over with me, ate a pretty decent sized burger for lunch, and suggested we come visit you._" Charlie's voice was such a mixture of astonishment, awe, hope and pride, that my eyes welled up again and I had to swallow the lump in my throat. My hard day was worth it to hear that in his voice. Even if I hadn't already been determined to keep pulling myself out of my pit, that would have settled any doubts.  
"That fucking _Cullen_ really screwed her up. It's just as well he's gone or I'd have been tempted to go set fire to the leech after seeing her looking so broken." Billy's voice was filled with hate and fury, but I was far too busy gritting my teeth against the ripping agony in my empty chest to worry about how he had just said a bit too much in the heat of the moment. I wrapped one arm around myself and firmly pressed the other hand against my mouth to prevent myself from making a sound and giving away my position behind the door.  
"Leech?" I heard Charlie and Jacob say together, and I fought my laboured breathing back to normal so I could hear Billy's reply.  
"Err yeah...you know... Cos he kinda sucked the life right out of her when he went?" Billy was quick, I'd give him that. It looked like he'd dodged a bullet with that fast explanation, as both Charlie and Jacob both nodded in slightly bemused understanding.  
"Anyway, both of you, while she's getting changed, I need to give you a heads up." Charlie said quietly. "Don't go questioning her. Just let her give as much as she feels ready to for now. Don't bring up any memories, and whatever you do, for fuck's sake, don't say _His_ or _Their_ names where she can hear you. It causes her actual physical pain, and throws her back into that zombie mindset again. Hell all it took was me stupidly mentioning the night she got lost when we bumped into Sam Uley earlier, and she grabbed at her chest and collapsed fighting for breath and passed out for a few minutes. Just don't make that same mistake, please" Billy's and Jacob's murmured assent came almost over the top of Charlie's last few words, though I did think I'd heard a snort from Jacob at Sam's name. Jacob was suddenly struck by a thought, it seemed, as he added  
"Well if Bells is making a bit of progress, maybe I can help by getting her over here where it's quiet and there's no one about to gawk at her, and we can just hang, or talk if she feels like it?"  
I felt the corner of my mouth lift a little, Jacob always was a good kid when we were little; always worried about other people's feelings, and it seemed that however tall he grew, he wasn't growing out of his kind nature.  
"Yeah, that might be good, Jake. How about you ask her when she come back in." He paused. "Come to think of it, she's taking a hell of a long time. You wanna go check she's not fallen own trying to get her boots off?" Hearing this, I quickly but quietly padded away from the door, jamming my hip into a sideboard in the narrow hall.  
"Ow! Shit!" I cried out, rubbing my hip as I saw Jacobs head peer around the door. Apparently I'd managed to get far enough away from the door to allay suspicion, as all I got from him was a snort of laughter, and an "Alright there, clumsy girl?" from the massively tall teenager.  
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine." I grumbled, still rubbing my hip as I limped slightly on my way back to the living room.

We ended up staying for pizza and while Billy and Charlie chatted together as they watched some ball game on tv, Jacob and I played a few hands of poker for bottle caps, stopping every once in a while for me to redistribute the pile of caps I'd won off him.  
"I'll never know how you manage to bluff so well at poker when you blush like a tomato if you try lying any other time." Jacob grumbled at me as I once again took the pot, scraping the bottle caps towards myself.  
"It's not real lying, that's why." I told him. "I've always looked as bluffing as part o the rules, so I know I'm not doing anything wrong, so the blush stays away." I shrugged and began sharing he bottle caps back out again.  
"Well I'm going to arrange a poker night with my friends Quil and Embry in the next few days, and you should totally come. It'd be fun watching you fleece someone else for a change. I noticed our dads tensing a little as they awaited my response - seems they weren't quite as oblivious to us as I'd thought. "Sneaky, sneaky."  
"Well ok then." I said, hoping I was making a good decision. "But on three conditions." I added "One: Make it a week's time, so I'm feeling and looking a bit better. Two: We play for pennies and dimes only. And three:" I gave him a small, evil grin. "Don't warn them!" Jacob gave a loud chuckle and he rubbed his hands together in anticipation.

"Conditions accepted." He said with a grin. "Poor guys won't know what hit 'em!" The dads joined in the laughter and we started wrapping things up, it was getting late and Charlie and I were both feeling physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted. Charlie grabbed his fishing gear which Harry Clearwater had dropped off for him at the Blacks' house, and chucked it onto the truck bed, we said our goodbyes, and we headed off back home after our long day.

I'd taken my first few steps up the ladder from my pit, and despite the roller coaster the day had proven to be, I felt like I could keep taking some more steps. Maybe taking it a little slower, but never stopping or going backwards from now on.  
Once we got back home, I tiredly dragged myself upstairs, giving Charlie an unaccustomed kiss on the cheek on the spur of the moment before I headed up, and pleased I'd done it when I saw the flustered but pleased look on his face.  
"Night, Dad. Sleep well" I garbled through a huge yawn.  
"You too, Bells" he replied.  
"_Huh yeah. We'll see"_ I thought as I closed my bedroom door and changed into a pair of scruffy but warm flannel pyjamas. "_Time to find out if I've finally settled my unconscious and can actually get some proper sleep."_ I wasn't going to waste my time hoping I wouldn't be having the 'alone in the forest' dream, but I was hoping that my working through the dreams earlier would make the other dreams ease up on me a little. _"Hmmm though there is that one scene I wouldn't mind so much"_ was the last thing I remembered thinking before my head hit the pillow and, exhausted, I fell straight to sleep.


	7. Chapter 6: How it Was, and How it Is

**Ok so it was time to attempt a spov chapter, and where all the previous chapters typed themselves almost, I had to force this one out with a crowbar. I ****_hope _****it doesn't read that way though; you'll have to let me know what you think. Thanks to everyone who's been kind enough to review. Keep the coming! ;0)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 6: How it Was, and How it Is

Sam POV.

It was just a couple of months before my eighteenth birthday that my life changed so dramatically that I could now barely recognise any similarities with my life before.

I'd never really been a typical teenager; having had to step up to fill my dad's shoes when he walked out twelve years ago made me an adult before my time. Taking on odd jobs whenever I could to help my mom make ends meet meant that I never really had the chance to socialise with kids my own age outside school, but I never minded too much. My mom and I were all each other had, and that was more important to me than whatever childish shit my schoolmates were getting up to after class. When Leah and I started dating, in our sophomore year, I couldn't help but worry that adding her into our lives would tip things off balance, but as it turned out, she fit seamlessly into our little family, even helping out around the house on occasion, and my mom loved her nearly a much as I did. Which was a big part of why Mom wasn't speaking to me right now, and hadn't done for nearly two years now.

She believed I had completely gone off the rails and was now on a mission to follow in Joshua, my father's footprints. I couldn't really blame her; I wasn't allowed to tell her any different, and the evidence of me disappearing for two weeks with no explanation, and then not long after my return, breaking up with Leah for no apparent reason, compounded by my constant leaving the house at all hours without telling her why or what I was doing was compelling.

The truth of the matter, which I was forbidden from telling anyone, even my own mother, was that thanks to the nice family of vampires that had moved into the area about six months before, I was now a werewolf.

The first time I phased into my wolf form, I didn't have the first idea what was happening to me. One moment I was my usual self, though angry as hell about a stupid kid in my class who I'd heard making comments about my dad earlier that day, so I went out back to chop some wood to try to burn off the anger. But my mind kept running the kid's comments over and over, making me more and more angry as I chopped, the next moment I felt like I was shaking apart, my muscle felt like they were vibrating themselves into a puddle and then I just... _Exploded_. I felt all my bones breaking and shifting, my joints dislocating, there was excruciating pain and then I fell still. I went to call out to my mom, to get her to call an ambulance, but all that came out was an animalistic whining and growling. Turning my head to see what had made the noise, I caught sight of my own body, but it wasn't me, I was a wolf.

I did what any sane person would do. I freaked the fuck out. It was lucky I was outside, because I through myself around a fair bit, trying to, I don't know, maybe shake myself out of my delusion? Maybe. But of course that didn't work. Terrified, and convinced I'd has some kind of psychotic break or something, I tore off into the forest as fast as I could, and holy shit was I _fast_! Seeing the world blur around me as I ran did nothing to convince me I hadn't gone insane or that I wasn't suffering from some hallucination, in fact the thought ran through my head that maybe someone had fed me something spiked with LSD or peyote, and I must have run for miles in my panic. At the time I didn't know how much time was passing as I ran about in my madness, completely terrified of what had happened to me and more and more firmly convinced as time went by that I was completely barking (pardon the pun) mad. I later learned that I was gone for about two weeks. Two weeks of running wild in the forest, eating what I could catch, drinking from dirty puddles, and slinking about outside the Rez, trying to catch the odd glimpse of my mom or Leah, sure in my heart that I could never return to them as I was either a total nut job who thought he was a werewolf, and so was too dangerous to be around those I loved, or I actually _was_ a werewolf, and so was too dangerous to be around those I loved.

Eventually I was exhausted enough to catch more than a fleeting nap, and in my sleep I phased back. I stumbled for hours though the forest, naked and filthy, and starving hungry, until I got close enough to my own house to risk making a run across the open ground and in through my back door. When my mom came back home a couple of hours to find me showered and dressed, and steadily eating my way though the entire contents of the kitchen, she was so relieved to see me that she didn't ask that evening where I'd been. But that didn't stop her in the morning. My shrugs and muttered evasions made her angry and worried but what was I supposed to tell her? _"Oh yeah, Mom. I just went totally bat shit crazy for a couple of weeks and I've been living out in the forest alone, eating squirrels - and one time a whole deer - raw, cos I thought I was a giant wolf"_? Just no. So I just kept it to myself and let her believe I'd been up to no good somewhere. It broke my heart to see her worried and disappointed in me -it still does now- but the truth would've been worse, so I just stuck it out.

Leah was just as bad. She'd been just as worried while I was gone, and was just as angry and confused as Mom when I refused to say where I'd been, and for the first time our relationship was under a real strain, she didn't feel she could trust me anymore, and I was so scared I'd have another mental breakdown that _I_ didn't trust me anymore either, so the tension just built. It wasn't until nearly a week later, by which time my refusal to explain my disappearance had driven an angry wedge between me and Mom, and Leah and I were on seriously shaky ground, that I finally got an answer for what had happened to me. Old Quil had come by to talk to my mom about something and as he came in the house I casually shook his hand. The moment his hand clasped mine, his eyes widened in shock and his grip on my hand firmed as he stared at me in astonishment. It took him a moment to recover his wits, and he made a stuttering excuse to Mom about how he'd just remembered something he needed to go do, and he shot out of our house like someone had lit his ass on fire. Later that evening, I got a call from Billy Black, asking me to go down to the council hall and do a couple of odd jobs, so I headed down there and Billy, Old Quil, and Harry Clearwater were there waiting for me. I'll never forget the feeling of astonished relief that came over me when Billy began the conversation with "So just what colour wolf are you, Sam?"

Over the next couple of hours they explained to me just what had happened to me, explained the old legends and how they were all true, and also that I couldn't tell _anyone_ about it. I think I must've gone through every emotion in the book that evening; relief that I wasn't in fact insane, fear that I would hurt someone, anger that my hopes and dreams were now just so much shit down the sewer as I was stuck here on the Rez forever, pride that I was now basically the new Chief of the tribe, and despair that despite knowing all this, I _still_ couldn't set my mom's or Leah's worries and frustrations to rest.

It was the very next day that I went, broken hearted, to the Clearwater's and broke up with the girl I loved so much, hurting her and myself in the process, and causing my mom to think I was heading down the same track that Joshua had done years ago. The bitter irony of it was that I had split with Leah precisely _because_ I didn't want to follow in Joshua's footsteps. The Elders had told me there was a chance that I would _imprint_ on another woman; meaning I would instantly care infinitely more for that woman, despite any previous ties I might have, and even if it was as rare as the Elders insisted, I couldn't bear the thought of maybe starting a family with Leah, and then years down the line having to walk out on her and my kids because I'd bumped into my soulmate in the dairy aisle at Walmart.

So here I am. No girlfriend, Mom not talking to me, living alone in a house the council gave me. I'm not alone in the wolf thing anymore. I'm not sure whether I'm more relieved at not being alone, or horrified that others have to suffer the same fate as me, but I guess it's pointless to feel either way. It is what it is, and we are what we are. About six months ago Jared phased for the first time, followed just six weeks later by Paul. So now we are three. But looking at the way a couple of guys on the Rez are suddenly shooting up, I'm guessing that we won't be just three for much longer. I hope I'm wrong - not only would I not wish this cursed life on anyone else, but the last thing I want is to be responsible for more traumatised teenaged boys - I don't think I am wrong though. It doesn't matter that the Cullen leeches have left the building; it's too late. The fever has set in, the changes have begun, and once they do, there's no stopping it. I know the signs, and also I can actually _feel_ them getting ready to join us. I guess it's an Alpha thing. Yeah. There's the ultimate punch line to all this; my mom and ex-girlfriend, along with most of the tribe think I'm this irresponsible, dangerous, bad boy gang leader, when in actual fact I'm responsible for the safety and well being of the entire tribe, including a pair of troubled teenage boys/men/wolves with anger management issues. And I'm only twenty years old for fuck's sake. Twenty today actually. _Happy fucking birthday to me. _

Feeling sorry for myself today, my third birthday with nobody to make note of it, the pack not even knowing, and my mom not talking to me, I sent the guys out on patrol without me and, after i spent the morning catching up on a little much needed sleep, I took the chance for a little solitude on the beach. The weather's too cold and windy for tourists, and it's a week day, so I had a good chance of having the entire beach to myself. I headed out at at a slow (for me) jog, towards the cliffs, and had been out for just over an hour when I caught a really enticing scent. Casting my eyes about, I spotted, about a half a mile up-wind of me, what looked like Chief Swan and a small female. _"Must be his daughter" _I reasoned_. "I thought Billy had said she'd turned into a total lock-in."_ In fact the way Billy had made it sound, the girl had become a complete basket case. Catatonic and unresponsive pretty much all the time. Screaming through the night from her nightmares, and an automaton during the day at school, work, and home. I could easily believe it.

The night I had gone out with Jared, and a newly phased Paul to search for her after her copper haired leech boyfriend had abandoned her in the forest, I'd never seen a more pathetic sight. It still haunted my dreams. Not her physical appearance; apart from being filthy and soaked to the skin, she looked fine. But her eyes. _God her eyes!_ They were just... _Empty_. Her empty, dead eyes and her endless litany of "he's gone, he's gone, he's gone" have woken me up from a deep sleep on more than one occasion. When we'd headed out in search for her at Billy's request, I was completely in sympathy with Paul's muttered complaints about the leech lover bringing any troubles she had on herself. But once I'd found her, and seen those eyes... Well. I could tell that the leech hadn't sucked her blood, but damn me if it didn't look exactly like he'd sucked her soul out instead. Almost as troubling was her reaction when someone mentioned the leech's name. You could almost feel the pain ripping through her. She was in agony, not only emotionally but physically. So yeah. I could easily believe Billy's second hand descriptions of how she'd been for the last few months.

I caught up to them just as they reached an ancient truck, and called out to the Chief; he'd asked me the week before if I had time to come do a few repairs around his place, so I figured I'd kill two birds with one stone. Save myself a phone call by arranging a visit to look over the work now, in person, and find the source of that amazing scent. I knew it wasn't the Chief - I'd spent enough time with him since I phased to be able to recognise his scent quite easily, so I guessed it must be Bella. The last time I'd seen her, she'd reeked of the leech family, their over sweet, bleach stink masked her own scent almost completely. But now, even overlaid by her father's scent, her own wonderful scent shone through, drawing me in.

The Chief and Bella both turned when I called and he raised a hand in greeting as I approached them. _"Holy crap. The state of her! She's more than half way dead!" _I was horrified at how Bella looked. Her skin was dry and so pale I could easily see the veins on her hands and face, she didn't just have bags under her eyes, it was a whole matched set of blackish purple luggage, and she was so thin! _"Fuck me. If she weighs as much as a hundred pounds, I'll eat Paul's shorts."_ At about 5'4" it made her look positively skeletal. No wonder her dad had been tearing his hair out over her. What had she done to herself? She watched me as I approached and I was at least relieved to see that her eyes weren't that empty void I'd seen there before. She looked a little glazed over for some reason, but it seemed more due to distraction than anything else. When I reached them, the Chief shook my hand and I asked him

"Hey, Chief, how's it going? Is it ok if I come by tomorrow to check out what you need doing round your place?"

"Hi, Sam. Yeah that'd be good. Any time is fine, I've got the day off, and Bells and I were just planning on hanging out together for a lot of it." He turned to Bella. "Kiddo, that's ok with you, right?" He got no reply; she still seemed deep in thought about something, her glazed eyes staring straight through my stomach and chest. "Bells? You remember Sam? Sam Uley?" Still no response, so he cleared his throat loudly to get her attention. That seemed to jog her out of her fog a little.

"Hmm?" She murmured, finally turning to look at the Chief, who was rolling his eyes at her with amusement. "Sorry, Dad, I sort of zoned out there for a moment. Did you say something?"

The Chief's moustache did a kind of twitchy thing. Either from annoyance or cos he was smiling - I don't know which.

"Yes, Bells. I was just asking you if you remembered Sam here. Sam Uley." He shifted his feet awkwardly. "He's the one who... Erm... Found you. You know that night." He said carefully.

She seemed to totally collapse in on herself.

The look on her face was one of complete agony, and she suddenly seemed incapable of drawing breath.

"BELLA" The Chief and I both yelled to her at the same time.

"Are you ok? Can you hear me?" I asked. She looked like she was going to pass out, so I ran forwards to catch her as the Chief continued shouting her name and telling her to just breathe.

I got to her just in time to catch her under the arms as her knees gave way. As I swung her up into my arms and turned to place her on the bench seat of her truck, I absently noticed the smell of blood pooling under her skin. She'd bruised herself quite badly somewhere. Her beautiful scent made me want to run my nose over her, to find the bruises by scent, though when I noticed the bruise smell was coming from her ass I was glad I hadn't given in to the instinct. _"Yeah, awesome move that would've been, Sam. Sniffing her butt, would've totally looked 100% human. And in front of her dad too."_ I laid her down in her truck, trying to block out the desolation I could now hear in the Chief's voice.

"Oh shit no. Not now. She was coming back, she was doing better, damnit. Please, please no. Not again. Please Bells, please, kiddo, don't go back inside your head again. Just breathe. Come back to me. You promised. You _promised_ you wouldn't do this to yourself again. To _me_ again. Please, Hun. _Please_" He seemed to be getting through, and I was relieved; hearing this was just heartbreaking. Her panicked breathing was slowly returning to a normal pattern, and I saw her hand move a tiny bit as she squeezed his.

"That's it, kid, come on back. Slow, even breaths. You can do it. Steady yourself, Bells. I'm right here. Not going anywhere. Take your time." The Chief's voice was cracking a little, though he was clearly trying to hold it steady, and she seemed to latch onto it like it was all that was pulling her back from wherever she had just been. She lay there for a couple of minutes. Eyes still shut, and concentrating hard on her breathing, it seemed. Then slowly her eyes opened and met mine. They were full of confusion for a moment, then I saw recognition as she realised who I was, and she turned a little to see the Chief who had run around to the driver's side door and climbed in the truck to sit next to her.

"It's ok. I'm ok, Dad. I'm sorry." She whispered. "It just took me by surprise and got away from me for a moment there, but it's ok now. I've got it locked back up again."

I was baffled. _"What's she on about?" _I wondered_. "What took her by surprise and got away from her? It's like she thinks about her panic like its a living thing. An animal to control. Huh. A bit like how I think about my wolf, when the anger's running high and trying to burst out of me in wolf form."_

"Nothing to be sorry about, Bells. You're doing great, just stay right there for a few more minutes til you're completely ready to sit up." The Chief said, and she nodded, still concentrating on her breathing as far as I could tell.

"Thanks, Sam." She mumbled with embarrassment. "I'm sorry about that. Probably not the response you get from most girls huh?" She joked, and I had to smile a bit at that. _"Brave girl."_ I approved silently._ "Trying to ease the load on her dad by breaking the tension a little."_

"Not to worry, Bella." I reassured her. "I'm not quite sure what I did to freak you out back there, but I'm really sorry. Are you going to be ok?"

"It was nothing." She replied, and my disbelief at that must've been easily read, because she quickly added "I mean you did nothing to freak me out. I was just hit with some bad memories and they kind of ripped my breath away for a few minutes. Not your fault."

Now that I could easily understand. I was frequently bothered by my memories of my first phase; the terror and confusion was still very real to me when my mind went back there, and I could set my heart pounding even now.

"Ahh. Ok I understand." I squeezed her knee. "Memories can be tough to fight through sometimes." She looked at me, clearly wanting me to explain what I meant. But I couldn't explain, even if I thought for a second she'd believe me, so I waved her off with one hand. "Anyway, enough about that." I said, quickly changing the subject. "Are you feeling a bit better now? I was just heading back home, but if you or the Chief need something...?"

"No, no, we're good." They both spoke at the same time, and I was impressed again with her resilience as a tiny smile curled around the edges of her mouth when she glanced over at him in amusement.

"You go on, Sam." The Chief added. "Me and Bells here will just sit for a bit til we're both ready to head out of here." I took a last chance to get a whiff of Bella's enticing scent as I reached across her to shake the Chief's hand.

"Ok Chief, if you're sure then." I drew in one last sniff as I pulled back, and I could almost feel my wolf wagging his tail with delight. _"Why the fuck is my wolf so pleased with that? It's not like she's my imprint; I've looked her in the eyes two or three times since I phased and nothing happened at all. Weird."_ I thought to myself, quickly moving back before she could notice me sniffing at her. "Bye then, Bella, Chief." I gave them each a nod. "See you about sometime." And I turned and jogged back down the path. _"I certainly hope we do see her about again."_ Now that was disconcerting; I had no idea if _I'd_ thought that, or _my wolf._


	8. Chapter 7: Grilled Cheese and Gossip

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit**

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Chapter 7: Grilled Cheese and Gossip

Bella POV

As it turned out, I was right. I didn't avoid the 'Alone in the forest' nightmare, in fact if anything it was worse. The entire time I was chasing _Him_ I could feel someone or something watching me. Not helping, not caring, not even following me as far as I could hear, just _watching_. It added a sinister tension to the dream that made my dream self's skin crawl, adding that to the already overpowering terror and loneliness. As had become my usual, I woke screaming, and Charlie came in to calm me down.

"Sorry, Dad. I was fairly sure this'd happen, but I was hoping..." I said wearily to him as he rhythmically rubbed my back.

"It's ok, Bells." He whispered. "We knew not to expect too much. The dreams will fade out before long I'm sure. But for tonight, you've had your dose, so you lie back down and try to get some proper sleep now." I shuffled down under my covers, nodding sleepily and was already asleep before he left my room to return to his.

My next dream found me once again in the ancient village of La Push. I was once again dressed in traditional Quileute clothing, but this time while it was me doing the domestic chores, it was also _not_ me, in that way that only dreams can manage to convey. I watched as me/not me sat skinning a deer carcass and the violence started in the background. Victoria, all wild and unkempt was once again slaughtering her way across the village, and with my knew awareness about what this dream meant, I wondered. "_Where are the wolves? Why aren't they protecting their tribe, their families?" _Then I saw on the ground, a giant wolf, covered in blood and twitching in his final death throes._ "Oh God, there was only one left, and she's killed him." _

From behind me I heard a terrible half human growling noise, and I turned to see an old man, shaking all over and before I could move towards him to help, he burst apart and instead there stood a huge, silvery grey wolf. He threw himself at Victoria, snarling and snapping and biting at her, but he was so far past his prime, I couldn't see how he could possibly survive, let alone defeat the feral female. Sure enough, she was soon no longer defending, but on the attack, and clearly winning if the yelps of pain from the wolf were any indication. "_Time for the sacrifice again then._" I thought as once more me/not me raised my knife to plunge into my own heart. But this time I paused with the knife point touching my skin. Instead of stabbing straight through this time, me/not me simply dragged the knife across the skin and muscle of my chest, great rivers of blood flowing behind the path of the blade, but this time it wasn't a fatal wound.

"Victoria" I called in an almost seductive voice, and sure enough she turned, her nostrils flaring at the scent of fresh flowing blood. She took a step towards me, then another, then all out ran to grab my neck and plunge her teeth into the other side, but my distraction had worked, the old wolf had the time to grab her head between his enormous jaws and rip it from her shoulders, just as I saw from the corner of my eye two young boys shudder and rip apart into their own wolves. Me/not me faded into black to the sound of the three wolves tearing Victoria into pieces.

Once again the scene changed completely. The village became just a single dark room, the tribe, Victoria, the wolves and me/not me became a single man and woman, terror and anger became passion and lust as the two writhed and moaned, sweat slick skin sliding over more sweat slick skin, hands and legs twisted together, grunts and groans filling the room. A magnificently toned male body, running with beads of sweat, and with a tribal tattoo clear on one bicep, roughly flipped the woman over, pulling he up onto all fours and simultaneously plunging back inside her as he fisted his hand into her hair. The screams were now of impassioned release as they come came together and once again the man's teeth cut through the skin on the back of the woman's neck, his growls somehow becoming the word "Mine" spoken in triumph. And in the corner of the room, a huge black wolf growled lowly in what I could only interpret as approval.

I shot upwards in my bed, suddenly wide awake and gasping for breath, casting my eyes wildly about the room, searching for what, I couldn't say. "Woah." I murmured under my breath. I was still panting heavily and I was coated with sweat myself. My panties were soaked with excitement and my skin was tingling all over, for the first time I had actually orgasmed in my sleep, _"That dream is so HOT! I almost hope I don't work out what I'm trying to tell myself with this one, so I can keep on having it over and over again. It's certainly a fuck load better than any of the other dreams!_" I reached over to my nightstand and gulped down the water I kept there, my hands shaking a little and my breath slowly returning to normal. _"The body on that guy looked familiar; Sam's. even down to the tattoo. It figures I'd fill in the blanks with the best example of male physique I've seen."_ I looked at the glowing green numbers on my alarm clock; 4:35. Sill time to get some uninterrupted sleep before I had to get up for school. Wait, no, yesterday was Friday, so I could sleep in for a while, I wasn't due at work til 1pm. I settled back down, resolving to leave the dream analysis for the next day, and take the opportunity for now to give my body some proper, healing sleep. I let my bone-weariness pull me under, and didn't stir for the rest of the night.

When I eventually woke just before mid-day I could hear Charlie banging around downstairs in the kitchen _"Oh shit. I hope he's not trying to cook down there. I don't think my body can handle food poisoning on top of everything else."_ I hauled myself out of bed, stiff and sore from the unaccustomed activities of the day before, And shuffled like a geriatric into the bathroom, picking up my toiletries on the way. _"Huh. I never did go to the store yesterday and replace this lot." _I remembered, looking at my strawberry scented shampoo and conditioner. _"I'll go after work today."_ After showering and washing my hair, I slipped into Charlie's room and swiped another plaid shirt from his closet, before returning to my own room and dressing in a pair of faded black jeans and an old band t-shirt, pulling Charlie's shirt on over the top and rolling the sleeves up a few times. Grabbing my work name tag, and an elastic to hold my hair back once it had dried a bit, I headed downstairs to see what Charlie had been up to in the kitchen, though a smell of slightly burnt toast was giving me a clue.

"Hey Dad. How did you sleep?" I asked him as I squeezed past him to get at the fridge, hoping to find some juice.

"Pretty good, thanks. How about you? You're looking a little less drained today, do I assume you managed to get some proper sleep in the end?" He asked, still fiddling around with something on the stove. I opened the fridge to grab the juice. No luck. It was pretty much empty, except for a couple of eggs, some very tired looking ham slices, and a dribble of milk left in the bottom of the carton. Sighing, I closed the fridge and turned to find Charlie putting a plate holding a couple of slightly singed grilled cheese sandwiches down on the table.

"Yeah I actually did, thanks." I gave him a small smile, and flopped down into my usual seat at the table, wincing as the bruises from the day before made themselves known. "This looks great, thanks, Dad" I said, gesturing at the grilled cheese, and grabbed one off the plate, juggling it from hand to hand to stop my fingers from burning.

"Oh hold on, let me get you a plate" Charlie quickly grabbed one for me from the cupboard and I gratefully dropped my sandwich onto it and blew on my fingers.

"I hope you don't mind, but I raided your closet again." I plucked at the collar of my shirt to show him what I meant and he chuckled at me.

"No that's fine, kiddo. Though I guess I'd better put a load in the machine if I'm going to be going through all my shirts twice as fast as usual." He sat down with me and started tucking into his own sandwich. "So did you decide to go to work after all today then?" He asked, eyeing my name tag where I'd dropped it on the table.

"If that's ok with you, Dad?" I was suddenly worried he'd be offended. Had he planned something for us to do together today? "If not, I'm sure I can call Mrs Newton..."

"No no, it's fine." Charlie waved off my offer "I've got a ton of stuff I can get on with today, I was just checking you felt up to working, but if you're sure you'll be ok, then that's great." I nodded in agreement and, picking up my plate to take it to the sink I added

"I figured I'd go to the store on the way home, stock up the kitchen a little." He smile ruefully "is there anything in particular you wanted for dinner tonight? I feel like cooking." I offered and his face lit up hopefully.

"How about lasagne? I've always loved your lasagne, no one else's can match it."

"Sure, dad. No problem at all. If you think of anything else, just call my cell phone and I'll add it to my list. I'd better head out or I'll be late. Thanks for brunch." I stood up stiffly and picked up my name tag and elastic, pulling my hair back into a ponytail as I walked into the hallway. My purple D.M.s from the day before we're standing next to the radiator, fully dried out from the day before, and I smiled at Charlie's thoughtfulness in making sure they'd be ready to wear again whenever I wanted them. Stepping into them, I grabbed my cell phone from the sideboard drawer and bent to tie them up, groaning slightly as my stiff and sore muscles protested. "Ok, I'm off now, bye, Dad. See you later!" I called over my shoulder and went out into the drizzling rain to my truck.

On Saturday afternoons, Mrs Newton always did the weekly stock count, and depending on how busy it was, either Mike or I were often drafted into the back to help out. I guess that with my autopilot Bella persona of late, I'd been almost the perfect assistant for a stock take - doing precisely as asked with no chit-chat to distract her as she trotted up the exact number of metal tent pegs, mosquito repellent sprays and bootlaces. So it seemed to be automatically assumed as soon as I walked in the door this afternoon that that was how I'd be spending my time today.

"Afternoon, Bella. Straight out back with me again today, please." Mrs Newton said as soon as she saw me, and accompanied her request with a hold and turn of my shoulders and a gentle shove in the right direction. _"Wow. Is that ever going to get old fast!" _I bitched to myself, though I knew I had no one but myself to blame for it._ "Time to let them know the zombie has left the building, I guess."_ I turned back to her and offered her a small smile.

"Sure, Mrs Newton, no problem. But do you mind if I grab a quick coffee to take with me? We've run out at home and I really could do with a caffeine fix." I left her and Mike standing open mouthed as I headed back to the little staff room behind the cash register to fix myself a cup. "Anyone else want one while I'm here?"

"N... No, thanks though." Mike stuttered, echoed by his mother, and I picked up my drink, along with a pen and clipboard and walked towards the stockroom.

"Shall we get started then?" I asked the still stunned Mrs Newton over my shoulder, and she closed her mouth with a snap and started walking along behind me.

We were halfway through the stock take before Mrs Newton finally followed up the side-long glances she'd been sending my way with an actual question.

"So, Bella honey, how are you doing? You seem a little more ... lively than you've usually been lately. Has anything exciting been going on at home?" She was studiously keeping her head down, but I could see her darting the odd look my way to see how I took her question. I smiled internally, but kept my face completely pleasant but blank.

"No, not really. Just the same old stuff as usual." I refused to give the Forks gossip circle any more ammo than they'd already gleaned, and Mrs Newton was practically the chairwoman of the nosy brigade. If I'd thought for a moment she was actually asking out of concern, I would've tried to find some kind of platitude to feed her, but as it was, I was just going to go with 'nothing to see here' until she gave up on the issue. "Why? Has there been anything exciting going on in town?" Maybe re-directing her with her favourite topic - gossip - was the way to go. It worked.

"Oh my, yes." She said excitedly, leaning forward as if sharing something top secret. "There have been hikers going missing for the last two months. It's up to five now, and only one has been found. Well I say they've been found, but what I mean is their _body_ was found. Looked like an animal attack apparently. But two weeks ago the fifth hiker went missing. I don't know what the police department are playing at. Surely they could put down their doughnuts long enough to..." She broke off suddenly. Obviously just now realising just who she was talking to, and who my dad was. "Yes well anyway. It's a very sad business. Their poor families." She finished off lamely. I gave her I tight, fake smile.

"Yes. It's an awful thing to happen. Have we got any signs up or flyers going out to help with the search? After all, it our customers who are most likely to either be in danger of being attacked by this animal themselves, or to maybe help in the search for those already missing." I knew there were none up in the store. Maybe it was a cheap shot, but I was disgusted at her excitement at the expense of the poor missing hikers, like the gossip was the only important factor. Her rudeness about the Forks police had also seriously grated on my nerves. So yeah, cheap shot perhaps, but she started it.

"Well no, dear, we haven't." She replied, a bit flustered. "I did give it some thought, but it would be bad for business you know. It might scare people away from going out in the forest, and therefore from buying hiking and camping equipment, so I decided against it." I couldn't help the look of shocked outrage on my face at her thoughts. _"Selfish, greedy bitch!" _I tried hard to rein my anger in, to swallow my retort, but the words came bubbling, hot and angry, out of my throat before I could stop them.

"No, quite right, Mrs Newton. You wouldn't want to miss out on a couple of hundred bucks just to help save a few lives, or to put the questions of the families of the missing hikers to rest; that's just not sound business sense." I raged. "No, it's much more sensible to do nothing to help, but instead spend as much time as possible bad mouthing the police department, who actually _are_ working hard to try to find the missing, and prevent any more people from meeting the same fate." She stared at me with gaped mouthed astonishment as I ranted. I took off my name badge and handed it to her. "I think I'd better leave. I'm sure my dad could use some help on the weekends and after school." I shrugged, then widened my eyes in a sarcastic parody of sudden realisation. "Oh! Or I could work at the diner. I'm sure they need help supplying all those doughnuts to the police."

With that, I spun on my heel and stormed (hiding my winces from my sore muscles) out past Mike, through the door, with its glaring lack of missing posters, climbed into my truck and sped off, my truck protesting the mistreatment until I rounded the first bend and let my foot ease up on the gas a little.

**I'm not entirely sure how that happened; At the beginning of this chapter I had no plans of Bella doing something so out of character. She just sort of took over a bit there and ran off in her own direction. Oh well. I'm sure she has a plan. I can only hope she'll share it with me as I tackle the next chapter. :0)**


	9. Chapter 8: Motorcycles and Mortification

**Ok so this chapter was s'posed to be me getting control over my characters and putting them back on the right path after Bella took matters into her own hands while I was writing last night and quit her job. Bella and Sam, however, refused to co-operate and clearly have their own agenda, so you lucky people will get 2 chapters today, cos that's how long it's going to take me to rein them in and get things back to my original plan. Enjoy. :0)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit**.

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Chapter 8: Motorcycles and Mortification. 

I drove a round town aimlessly for nearly an hour, trying to calm myself down after my outburst. I wasn't sure just what had come over me. I'd never been the sort of person to lose my temper like that, normally anger for me was characterised by stuttering frustration, accompanied by tears, as if my tear ducts were hard wired to my temper, and yet today I had been able to say exactly what was going through my mind without getting flustered and tearful. No. It wasn't that I had 'been able to say' it. I _couldn't stop it_.

It had boiled out of me, unstoppable, and devastating, like a pyroclastic flow. I couldn't make myself feel sorry for it though. The horrible woman had deserved every word, especially after speaking ill of my dad. Charlie was a good man, one who worked incredibly hard for the protection of his community, and I wasn't going to just stand there and let her say anything different. _"Well, Bella. You were planning on making some changes. Looks like one or two are just happening by themselves."_ The thought was both welcome and disturbing at the same time, and I felt my empty chest throb.

I pulled up at the side of the road, wondering where in the hell I was. I wasn't concerned - Forks is a small town, there's only so lost you can get, but I did still plan on going to the store, and I wanted to beat Charlie home so that I could fill him in on what had happened at Newton's myself, before the town gossips started ringing the phone off the hook. Up ahead I could just make out the cemetery. _"I must be on Calawah way"_ I realised, and I started to make a U turn to head back towards the store. Halfway through making the turn, I spotted something sitting on the lawn of one of the houses. I couldn't make out what it was, but whatever it was, it had a 'free to collector' sign leaning against it. Having spent years digging around flea markets and yard sales with Renee, it was hard wired into my very being not to pass it by without investigating, so I completed my turn, put the truck into park, and stepped out into the rain to see what it was. _"A pile of scrap metal."_ Was my first conclusion, but then I noticed the wheels. It was a motorcycle. No. Two motorcycles. They were in pretty bad shape, maybe they'd never run again. But _maybe_...

I stood there like a statue, deep in thought and staring at the scra.. the motorcycles. I was planning to make some changes. And motorcycles were certainly _different_. The hole in my chest gave a painful twinge at the thought of not only making changes, but doing so deliberately. I may have resigned myself to the fact that _He_ and I would never fit together again, but I _still loved Him_. I probably always would, so the pain was to be expected. Hopefully, with time it would lessen, or I'd at least get used to it. I knew I wasn't ready to make big changes yet, just one day after I started to pull myself out of my pit, but these motorcycles would take weeks to fix up. Maybe by then I'd be ready, and if not I could always sell them on and maybe make a few bucks.

My feet, it seemed, were already making the decision for me. Without me consciously telling them to, they were making their way up the path to the house of the current owner. When they finally stopped in front of the door, I took the hint and knocked on the door. A kid answered. I recognised him from school, a freshman I thought.

"The motorcycles on your lawn, are they really free for whoever wants them?" I asked him, pointing over my shoulder at the pile of sc.. the motorcycles.

"Yeah." He answered, shrugging. "My mom wants rid of them, so if no-one takes them, the garbage truck will collect them tomorrow."

"Then I'll take them." I decided. "Can you help me load them onto my truck?"

A lot of huffing and grunting, pulled muscles and scraped knuckles later, I was driving away, the proud owner of two broken down, rusty motorcycles, with no idea how to get them fixed up, or where to store them. I knew Charlie's opinion on motorcycles; he had responded to far too many RTAs involving them to think they were a good thing, especially on the almost permanently rain slick roads of Forks, but I had no intention of lying to him about them. I had damaged our relationship enough, and lying to him about anything at his point seemed just so wrong that I couldn't bring myself to do it. I was eighteen, an adult, and I would behave as such. If he really, _really_ hated the idea of me riding one, I'd just drive them to the scrap yard myself. No loss. Noticing the time, I realised I'd better get a move on if I wanted to hit the store and get back before him, so I sped up a little and headed my truck in the right direction.

Mrs Newton had clearly been on peak performance today; as I wandered around the store, I couldn't help but notice several of her cronies giving me the stink eye, but I stubbornly refused to acknowledge their hostility, and returned each glare with a pleasant smile, and the odd "Afternoon." Seeing how much my seeming obliviousness annoyed them made me smirk internally, though I did wonder just how she'd related the confrontation this afternoon. She could hardly have told them all the absolute truth of the matter; it would cast her in a much worse light than me, so no doubt she'd either coloured it carefully in her favour, or simply lied outright. I found I really didn't give a shit either way. The people I cared about would hear my side of the matter soon enough, and anyone who chose to believe Mrs Newton's version was simply not worth sharing my oxygen with. _"Hmm. Another change I hadn't planned on making - it seems I no longer care about drawing attention._" Rubbing my chest absently as the thought of more changes made it ache, I tripped over the wheel of my shopping cart and blushed as I heard someone sniggering at me. _"Ok. Lets amend that. I no longer care about drawing attention from those I actively dislike."_ I went down the last aisle, grabbing myself some coconut shampoo and conditioner to replace what I had at home, and made my way to the checkout.

The cashier was a woman I knew well - her husband had been the Chief of police before he was invalided out and had in fact recommended Charlie as his replacement. I smiled at her as I put all my groceries on the counter in front of her.

"Hi, Mrs Green. How are you?" I asked as I rummaged in my pocket for my money. She glared at me and made no reply. The smile fell from my face. _"Oh dear. Clearly one of Mrs Newton's inner circle._" I forced my smile back and pretended not to notice her hostility. As the last few items went into brown bags, I looked up to see what I owed, and saw, sitting on the counter in front of me, a large box of condoms. Puzzled, I raised my eyebrow and looked questioning lay at Mrs Green.

"I figured you should probably stock up, _dear_, if you're going to keep throwing yourself at young men the way Mrs Newton caught you throwing yourself at her Mike in her stock room this afternoon." She said with venom, and tucking the box into one of my bags "The poor boy didn't know how to deal with the situation as he'd already turned you down on several occasions. If you're so anxious to sleep with every single male in town, you'd best start to use protection. For their sakes, if not for yours."

Eyes wide.

Mouth gaping.

Silence.

I stood there in shock for a moment. "...!..." I had nothing. _"Mike turned __**me**__ down several times? Throwing myself at all the guys in town? Oh. My. God. Seriously?"_ All noise around me had completely ceased as everyone near the checkout paused to see how I would respond. Finally my mouth closed. I felt my shoulders shaking. My breath was coming in great heaving gasps, _"Oh fuck, Bella, don't cry in front of all these busybodies. It just what they want. Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry" _

It took me another few seconds to realise I _wasn't_ crying. I was _laughing my ass off._ Great snorts of laughter tore themselves out of my throat, I could barely drag in the next breath as my hysterical giggling doubled me over.

"S. s. s. seriously? That's what she went with? Throwing myself at her son in the stock room?" I grabbed at the counter to hold myself up. "Oh, and don't tell me, she walking in and caught me, and had to rescue her poor innocent son from my clutches?" Another burst of laughter ripped through me.

"Like you don't already know." Another lady, I think she was a teller in the bank, spat under her breath from next to the other till, clearly another member of the gossip circle. Mrs Green, however, looked a little less sure of herself.

I turned to face the other lady. "Yeah, ok. So I went from being a total shut in two days ago, and don't pretend you don't know about that, to_ 'The Great Floozie of Forks'_ today. _When_ was I supposed to be seducing all these men? When I was being catatonic at home, when I was being a zombie at school, or maybe when I was being robotic at work?" My laughter was totally out of control now, I think I actually peed myself a little, I was laughing so hard. "You lot are all so desperate to believe bad things about me, feel free." I snorted "While you're at it, here's a few freebies. When I was six, I cut a little girl's hair off in class, cos she was hitting people with her braid on purpose. When I was eight, I stole a pack of gum, then took it back half an hour later and confessed cos I felt so guilty. Oh! Yeah! And one time I tipped out all of my dad's bait when we were out fishing cos I was cold and bored and wanted to go home, then I pretended I'd tripped over the bait bucket by accident." At this last one, I heard Mrs Green start to laugh along with me.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I should have known you better. In all the years I've known you and your father, you've never been that sort of girl. I don't know what I was thinking." She apologised, looking very sincere, and I smiled at her through my giggles.

"Doesn't matter, Mrs Green. People make mistakes, I don't hold it against them." I reached out and squeezed her hand. Finally gaining control over my breathing, I turned to the little crowd that had, by now, gathered round the checkout. "What actually happened, for those that care more about the truth than idle gossip and slander, is that Mrs Newton was bad mouthing the police and their efforts towards finding the missing hikers." I made eye contact with as many of the known gossips as I could, one by one. "I got mad, which I probably shouldn't have done, questioned why she didn't have any missing posters up for the hikers, or any flyers on the counter, and when she said it was because it would be bad for business, I shot my mouth off a bit, quit, and walked out. Not a very exciting tale, but of course there was no way you were going to hear any of that from her as it would make her look bad." I shrugged and turned to Mrs Green. "I guess she was relying on the fact that lately I've barely communicated with my own dad, let alone anyone else, and so she thought she could spread whatever lies she chose and I wouldn't say anything different. Well. She was wrong." I turned to pick up my grocery bags, wanting to make a grand sweeping exit, but there were just too many to manage by myself all in one go. _"Shit! So much for a dignified storm out. Guess I'd better swallow my pride and ask for some help."_ Suddenly a pair of strong, russet skinned arms reached over me and picked up several of the bags, leaving me with only one to carry.

"Fantastic job, Bella. Now allow me to assist you in your grand exit." I looked up into Sam's smirking face and gave him a grateful smile.

"Thanks, Sam. Perfect timing." We turned towards the exit and walked together to the door and he bent down to whisper in my ear.

"Are we leaving with, or without a one fingered salute?" I giggled a little and gave it a bit of thought.

"Without I think." I sighed in resignation. "At the moment I have the moral high ground. I probably shouldn't give it up for a rude gesture." I smirked a little "No matter how much they deserve it." He grinned widely at this and for a second I was taken aback. _"Beautiful"_ was all I could think for that second as the grin lifted all the worry from his face and lit it up, making his eyes almost glow. I tripped a little, and he somehow juggled all the grocery bags and managed to grab my elbow before anyone else noticed my slip.

"Careful, Bella. Wouldn't want to ruin that dignified exit." He joked, and I nodded. He carried my bags over to my truck with me, and put them on the passenger side of the seat when I unlocked the door.

"Thanks again, Sam. I really appreciate the help."

"Of course." He shrugged "You handled all of that so well, I couldn't do anything else but help you out. You're doing good, Bella. Charlie will be so proud of you when he hears about this. And you know he _will_ hear about it. That was a good half of the Forks gossip brigade you just set in their places. Someone's bound to fill him in, and probably pretty quickly too." He was right. I quickly walked around, unlocked the driver's door and scrambled into my truck.

"Good point. I'd better shift it if I want to get to him before the gossips" I said, throwing the single grocery bag I held over with the others. To my absolute horror, something fell out of the bag and fell, through the still open passenger door, to the ground at Sam's feet. Something box shaped. Something brightly coloured. Something with "Trojan" printed in big bold letters across the top of it. My face flamed red instantly, and I banged my head against the steering wheel and hid my face in my arms.

_"Oh for fuck's sake. In front of the hot bodied guy? Kill me now. Seriously. Just open up the ground, and swallow me and my truck. Please, God, you'd be doing me a huge favour." _Sam's laughter from next to my truck grew louder and louder.

"Did you know you're saying that out loud?" He chuckled, making my flush an even deeper red.

"Shit." I banged my head once more against the steering wheel. I turned my head to him still resting it on the wheel. "Well _that _was embarrassing." I stated obviously. "Any chance you could just pretend that I just walked with dignity from the store, climbed into my truck, thanked you politely and drove off?" I almost begged.

"Wellllllll" he drew the word out as he pretended to think it over. I banged my head again, once, twice, thr... On the third time, a large, hot hand placed itself in my way, protecting my head. I looked up. Sam had reach across from the passenger side and shoved his had between my head and the wheel.

"Careful, you don't want a huge bruise there" he murmured, his face just a couple of inches from my own. "Ok. I'll give you a pass on this one. It never happened." I smiled gratefully at him and his face, so close to mine, grinned back. His grin turned a little evil. "But now you owe me." And with a wink, he pulled back and closed the passenger door. He gave me a half wave, and strode off back into the store, and I drove off quickly, still trying to gain control over my blushes as I headed home to begin damage control with Charlie.

_"I was right though." _I thought as I drove. _"When he smiles like that, and even more so when he laughs, he really is beautiful."_


	10. Chapter 9: Lasagne and Last Straws

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit**.

Chapter 9: Lasagne and Last Straws

I made it back home about an hour before Charlie. It took me three trips, juggling three and four bags at a time to get all the groceries inside. _"Jeeze how big are Sam's arms, that he can manage all these but one in one go?"_ I felt completely addled. The last two days had thrown so much at me and I was at the end of my tether. After so long doing nothing, _being_ nothing, I just couldn't handle so much all at once. I needed to slow down. Take stock. Re-learn how to just _be_. I took a deep, steadying breath and mentally broke down all the things I had left to do that day into simple, manageable steps, so I could just get through until bed time.

_"Ok. Step one: Put away the groceries."_ That was a nice easy one. I set myself to the task, emptying one bag at a time, and deliberately not focusing on the box on condoms in the last bag, which I threw into the back of my nightstand drawer when I took my new shampoo and conditioner up to my room to put away. I grabbed the old, strawberry stuff and took it downstairs to throw into the kitchen trash can. _"Good. That's one job done. Now. Step two: Start dinner." _

I took the ingredients from the fridge and cupboards and quickly lost myself in the rhythm of the kitchen. This was why I loved to cook. My hands pretty much took over, doing the tasks with no fuss and bother without me needing to really think about it. Freeing up my mind to focus on other things. "_Well, now step two is underway, why not work on step three: Go over those dreams?"_ This was probably my best chance to do some thinking on the dreams. If I didn't, they'd only repeat again that night, and I really needed some restful sleep if I could manage it. So I turned my mind to the task as I chopped and stirred.

The Victoria dream had, at the time, seemed like just more of the same scenes I'd seen before, but as I turned it over in my mind, there were a few things that stood out. The old man that had turned into a silvery grey wolf. The more I thought about him, the stronger the feeling I got that he was a powerful man, despite his ancient appearance. Not just powerful in position in the tribe, although that was clear too from his clothes, but he had exuded a strength, almost a _magical strength_, as if despite his body being weak, his soul was a brightly burning flame of power. The feeling of _right_ this time was so strong, it shook me a little. I wondered who the old man represented to my subconscious mind. The only person I could think of who was even close was Billy Black, but he was too young to fit the bill, and though on occasion he seemed to be a lot more powerful than his wheelchair bound body suggested, it wasn't the same level of power which emanated from the old man in my dream. The thought gave off that 'nearly but not quite' feeling. Like I was on the right track, but missing the point at the last minute. _"Grrr. Frustrating. Maybe he's a character from the old legends."_ Again, that very strong feeling of _right_ hit me hard. I'd have to look out that book I'd bought about Quileute legends when I was trying to figure out what Ed...

The pain hit like a sledgehammer to the chest.

_"Stupid, stupid, stupid, Bella."_ I'd been concentrating so hard on the dream, that the line of thought about the book and it's significance crept up on me unawares. I sat, curled up on the kitchen floor for a few minutes, fighting for breath with my missing lungs, rocking back and forth as I struggled against the pull back into the pit. I forced myself to focus on the image of Charlie sobbing with me in my bedroom, and found that as dreadful as it was to see, it provided me with a lifeline to follow away from the abyss, and after a few more minutes, I was able to slam the door shut on the room holding my pit, and begin to balance out my breathing again. Pulling myself to my feet, I reached out a shaky hand to the knife and took a few more deep, steadying breaths before I went back to my chopping. _"I __**must**__ be more careful where my mind goes. If I break down like that in front of Charlie, it hurts him so much. I can't do that to him over and over."_ I warned myself. The recovery time had been a little less on this occasion though. The edges of the pain a little duller. I chose to concentrate on these tiny positives as I stirred the ground beef and tomato sauce, rather than thinking about the pain itself.

As I began building the giant lasagne in it's tray, I allowed my hands to find their rhythm again and carefully went back to running through my dream again. _"So the old man is important somehow, and I need to look him up."_ I avoided thinking about the specific book.

Instead I turned my attention to the next part of my dream. I had never been both me and _not_ me before in one of my dreams. I had always either been watching other people, or had been clearly involved myself. It was very confusing. I seemed, in the dream, to be linked with the old man somehow, but as I couldn't place him as a metaphor for someone I knew in reality, I could only assume that the _not me_ part of myself in the dream was the part that was linked to him. _Right_. This time it was a gentle feeling washing over me, reassuring in the turmoil I had been feeling that day.

A niggle edged at the corner of my mind; in this dream scene, there were people I either knew, or understood what they represented - me, and Victoria, and there were also people I couldn't place as representing anyone in reality - not me, the old man/wolf, and the two young boys who turned into wolves right at the end of the scene._ "Then maybe I'm mixing two dreams together. A dream based on one of the legends, and the dream about Victoria coming back for her revenge." _Again, once more, the _right_ feeling spread over me like a warm comforter_. "But I thought I'd settled that one. She'll come back, and I will have to sacrifice myself to keep Charlie safe. So why is it repeating?_" Usually, once I'd worked out in my conscious mind what my subconscious was trying to tell me, the dream stopped repeating. I needed to work out what was different this time.

I topped the lasagne with cheese, placed it in the oven, and started in on the salad.

_"So what was different in this scene, compared to last time?" _The most glaring difference I could see, apart from the presence of the old man/wolf and the boys, was the stab to the heart in the previous dreams, and the cut across the chest this last time. "_Ok, so a fatal wound isn't necessary - just shedding blood will distract her. But what's the point of distracting her? There's no-one around who can take advantage of the distraction and kill her."_ I sighed, it was probably just me projecting a touch of wishful thinking into my dream. I didn't want to die. I would, if it meant keeping Charlie safe, but that was a very different thing to actually wanting it. Lacking any right feeling, I abandoned this line of thought and instead switched to the other dream scene, the sex scene.

I was a little torn on this one. Working out what message I was trying to send myself would mean the dream would stop repeating, but I wasn't sure I wanted this one gone just yet. It was a little too enjoyable for my own good. But then again, which did I need more; restful, undisturbed sleep, or sleeping orgasms. For a moment I actually considered it. It had been a really, really great orgasm. _"Don't be ridiculous." _I chided myself._ "Your body needs proper rest to build itself back up. If you need great orgasms, go buy a new vibrator."_ It was a good point. I focused on the dream with greater resolve. I was already pretty sure that I knew what the sex and biting part of the dream was about in any case, as I had already reminded myself, the conversation with (I took a deep breath) _Carlisle_ - the ache in my chest throbbed, but I had been ready for it and held firm - when he stitched up my arm gave me more than enough of a clue, but I just wasn't ready to make myself remember the conversation in detail. At this early point in my recovery, the damage done by forcing myself to think on it would do more damage than could be balanced out by resolving the dream and getting a better quality of sleep.

Instead I gave thought as to who was in this scene, and why. I could no longer pretend that the woman wasn't myself. The fact that I could feel everything that happened, as it happened, combined with the milky paleness of the woman's skin, and the waterfall of mahogany hair, made pretending otherwise ridiculous. And I had a fairly good idea who the man was. This last time at least. _Sam_. Though I was also equally sure that I'd just taken the sight of his undeniably ... erm ... attractive body, and simply fitted it into the dream where applicable. Hell, I'd even got his tattoo in there. _"So definitely Sam then, but probably only cos the dream needed a male figure, and his was both the latest I'd seen, and also the best."_ The _right_ feeling failed to make its appearance, but I figured it was due to the fact that I refused to recall that conversation which would resolve the dream.

Finishing the salad, and taking it to the table, I looked instead at the last part of the dream scene; the black wolf in the corner of the room. I already knew that the wolf represented the extinct shape shifter clan of the Quileute tribe, but I failed to see how that could be of use or importance to me. After all, the keyword here was _extinct_. I banged the tray of garlic bread down on the work top in frustration. I was clearly getting nowhere fast with this picking at my dreams. I should just deal with the fact that with the possible exception of the old man/wolf and me/not me nuance to the Victoria dream scene, I was going to get a repeat performance again tonight. I gave a heavy sigh and started cleaning down the work surfaces. The lasagne and garlic bread were in the oven and the salad prepared, so I guessed I could call both steps two and three done for now. I heard Charlie's cruiser pull up outside. Time for step four: Talk to Charlie about the motorcycles.

"Hey Dad. How's your day been?" I asked as I stepped out of the front door to meet him. He stopped and looked at me quizzically. Coming outside to meet him wasn't something I'd ever done before, so he as wondering what was up already.

"Pretty good, thanks, Bells" he said "Was there something wrong? What you doing out here?" I took a deep breath and began my first salvo in 'Operation: Convince Charlie That Motorcycles Aren't Quite As Bad As He Thinks'.

"Well I wanted to show you something I picked up today, and run a few ideas past you about it. But I'm going to need you to listen to everything I have to say, and not just dismiss it out of hand." I prepared him as much as I could. "If you're really not happy with it once you've heard me out, I promise I'll just forget the whole thing." I added as I led him to the back of my truck.

"A pile of scrap metal" he said, looking at me for an explanation. I snorted with laughter, making him grin in return. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing really, Dad. It's just that I said the exact same thing to myself when I first saw them." He grinned again. And then his grin faded into a frown.

"Them?" I saw the moment he realised what he was looking at, and quickly jumped in before he could veto it right off the bat.

"I know what you're thinking, Dad. But just hear me out? _Please_?" I pleaded with him and he sighed in resignation.

"Come on then, lets hear it." I gave him a little, grateful smile, took a deep breath, and plunged in.

"Well I was driving around town this afternoon - I'll explain why over dinner - and I saw the pile of scrap, as we both labelled it, sitting on someone's lawn marked 'free to collector' ..." I filled Charlie in on the little tale of how I found the motorcycles, and my reasoning behind picking the, up. He listened, his face alternating between worry, interest, understanding, and more worry. As I came to the end of my speech. He gestured for me to come in closer, and he leant down to look me dead in the eye.

"I you can make me two serious promises here, Bella, then I won't make you scrap them straight off." It was very rare that he called me 'Bella' so I knew he was completely serious about whatever these promises were.

"What is it you need me to promise?" I asked, warily.

"You are to ask someone who knows _exactly_ what they're doing to teach you to ride _safely_. That's number one, and number two, yours will be an _off road_ bike. You can ride it up lanes and tracks, around fields and hell, even on the beach, if the tribal cousin say its ok. But you will _never, ever_ ride a motorcycle on the road. _Especially_ here in Forks where the roads are so wet all the time." I was more than happy with this compromise. I had my truck for driving around town. The motorcycles were more a project than anything, and if I ever felt ready to have a go on one, riding on a track or lane would easily serve the purpose.

"That's absolutely fine, Dad. I promise you I'll get someone to teach me and I won't go on the road on one." He sighed and nodded, resigned.

"Well ok then Bells. Now you just need to work out how to fix them up." He smirked at the thought.

"I'll figure something out, don't you worry." I retorted. "Now. Dinner will be about twenty minutes, so you've got time to wash up ready."

"Oh crap!" He replied, making me blink in surprise. Not the response I'd expected. "Sorry, kiddo. It's just that I just remembered I'd asked Sam Uley round to have a look at those few jobs I wanted done, and he called earlier to say he'd be by at about 7:30." I looked at the clock on my cell phone. 7:20. I sighed.

"Did you want to ask him if he'd like to eat with us?" I offered. "There's more than enough; I'd planned to freeze a few portions, so I made extra." Charlie grinned.

"That'd be great, kid. Thanks." He headed into the house to go and wash up, and I returned to the kitchen to check on he oven and finish cleaning up after myself.

The house phone started ringing less than a minute after I'd gone back into the kitchen. _"Right on cue. That'll be the gossip train pulling in. I wonder who they've got watching for Charlie to arrive back home." _I lifted the receiver and pressed the decline button. It took under thirty seconds for it to ring again. After several more presses of the decline button, I gave in and hit the call button, opening the line at our end, and preventing any incoming calls from connecting. About five minutes later, I heard a truck pull up outside.

"That'll be Sam" Charlie called into the kitchen as he headed to the door. "I'll just show him the jobs outside first. Back in in a moment." He was outside before I could reply, so I busied myself hooking the colossal lasagne and garlic bread out of the oven and taking them across to the table, and setting an extra place for Sam. The phone gave a shrill tone, a reminder that there was a line open, and I hit the decline button to close the line. Before I could try the ploy again, the phone rang once again, but I'd already started to press the call button, so I accidentally answered the call. Grimacing, I put the phone to my ear.

"Swan residence"

"Hello there, dear. I'd your father there?" _"Unbelievable. It's the bank teller lady." _I realised.

"Yes, he is, thanks." I replied, and hung up, quickly opening a new line to prevent another call. From outside I heard two voices roaring with laughter, neither of them Charlie. _"Two? Guess I'd better set a fourth place at the table." _As I was doing so, Charlie came back inside, followed by a still chuckling Sam and another guy, just as tall and very nearly as muscled. Neither was wearing a shirt.

"Bells, this is Jared Cameron. He works with Sam." Charlie introduced the new guy, and I nodded to him from the other side of the table.

"Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm Bella." I said, offering a small smile. I looked at Charlie. So are they joining us? Only it's all ready and I don't want it to get cold." Charlie looked expectantly at the two younger men.

"You want to join us, guys?" He asked. "Bells here makes the best lasagne you've ever tasted, and there's plenty to go around." Sam and Jared looked at each other, seemingly communicating silently with their eyes.

"That'd be great, yeah, if you're sure?" Sam replied, with a small smile at me, and with an answering smile I said

"Really, it's fine. I made extras anyway, so please." I gestured for them to sit down and we all settled together around the table. Just as we were all taking our first bites, the phone made that god awful shrill tone again, and I jumped up to close the line before Charlie could wonder what the noise was. Of course, as soon as I did so, the phone rang again.

"Stupid fucking busybodies" I whisper grumbled under my breath, and looked up as Jared choked a little on his mouthful. "You ok?" I asked him as Sam whacked him heavily on his back. Jared nodded at me, his hand over his mouth to cover his cough, but his eyes dancing with mischief. I shrugged off the weird feeling that he'd heard my grumbling and glared at the still ringing receiver in my hand.

"You gonna get that, kiddo, or shall I?" Charlie asked me, and I gritted my teeth and replied.

"No. I'll get it." I took a breath and pressed the call button.

"Swan residence"

"Put your father on the phone, you little tramp" I didn't recognise the woman's voice, but there were no prizes for guessing which story she'd heard and was dying to pass on.

"Sorry, he won't fit." I replied, hanging up the phone and switching it to silent. The stereo sound of choking snorts came from Sam and Jared and I looked at them, confused. They couldn't possibly have heard both sides of the call. I shrugged, figuring they must've guessed what the call was about and sat down, turning to Charlie and saying. "Well I guess I'd better tell you what happened this afternoon before they start knocking at the door next." Charlie looked baffled and asked

"Before who start banging? Was there a problem at work or something today, Bells?" I chuckled bitterly.

"Yeah. 'Or something'." Sam gave me a warm smile and interjected.

"Tell you what, Chief, you'd have been proud of your daughter today if you'd seen her in action. I only caught the second act, and that was impressive enough, but I'm guessing the first act was a real show stopper." All eyes were suddenly on me and as usual, I reacted by blushing like a tomato on a sun bed. _"Uh oh. Time for step five: Tell Charlie before the gossips do."_

"Yeah ... Ummm... See at work today..." Keeping my eye down at my fingers as they picked at each other, I launched into the story of what had happened with Mrs Newton at work, what she'd said, what I'd said, and my resultant unemployed status. "And that's why I was driving around town aimlessly when I found those bikes." I finished off, still with my eyes firmly on my hands. There was total silence from the others and I hesitantly looked up to see both Sam and Jared looking at Charlie, and his eye on me.

"So if that was the first act, what was the second?" He asked Sam, and Sam looked to me for approval to tell the story. I nodded my assent, and he began telling the others all about my adventure in the grocery store, minus, _thank fuck, _the embarrassing incident back at the truck. I reddened again, just remembering it. It seemed Sam had been closer by than I'd thought, as he'd clearly heard every single word that had been spoken at the checkout. Silence reigned once again after Sam had finished his part and again he, Jared and I looked at Charlie for his reaction, while Charlie stared at me. His moustache began to twitch.

"And on the phone a few minutes ago?" He asked. I filled him in on the call, minus the 'tramp' comment, no need to add that in. His moustache twitched even more. Suddenly he could hold it in no longer and great roars of laughter filled the air. It was a wonderful sound, something I'd not heard enough of over the years, and certainly not at all in the last few months. Jared's and Sam's laughter soon joined Charlie's, and even I found myself giggling along a bit.

"Oh Bells, hon, I'm so proud of you. You really gave all those nosy bitches what they had coming, but never once crossed the line. You even managed to stop Mrs Green in her tracks, get her back on the right track, and managed to make sure there were no hard feelings. Truly a masterful piece of work. He stood up from the table and came round to my side, giving me an awkward noogie/hug type thing that somehow managed to convey all his love and pride, without embarrassing either of us with a public emotional display. Charlie's cell phone rang just then and he went into the living room to answer it. It was his work line.

Sam and Jared had already cleared their plates, despite the huge portions I'd served them, and Charlie had almost finished his. Although my appetite was slowly returning, I was struggling to finish off the modest portion I'd served myself, and so I sat back, putting my fork down.

"Thanks for dinner, Bella, it was amazing." Sam said, grabbing his and Jared's plates, and taking them to the sink.

"Yeah it really was. Best lasagne I've ever had. I'll definitely be coming back here again." Jared joked, sitting back and rubbing his stomach appreciatively. They both fell silent for a moment, and somehow the room felt a little tense.

"I'm really sorry to eat and run, Bella, but I've just realised the time, and Jared and I need to get back to the Rez. We promised we'd give another quote for a house over there this evening. Thanks again, it really was an awesome dinner." He gave me one of his beautiful grins and I waved him off.

"It was no trouble, really. I'd already cooked it all, you two just helped us eat it. And you helped that whole gossip telling thing go better too, so I owe you some thanks I think." I smiled at them both as I walked them to the door. Just as he was about walk down the porch steps, Sam leaned down to whisper in my ear "That's two you owe me then." And with that, he and Jared hurried into their truck and were gone.

I turned to go back inside, and met Charlie coming out.

"I'm sorry, Bells. I've got to go. Another hiker's gone missing, we need everyone we've got to join the search. Stay indoors, and lock everything up, will you? I'll call you every couple of hours to check you're ok." I gave him a quick hug.

"Sure, dad. I'll be fine. You just keep yourself safe and good luck out there."

"I just hope it's not another animal attack." He said, shuddering at the memory of the last one. "It's bad enough finding bodies out there in the forest, but when they're all pale and bloodless it makes it worse somehow. Creepier, or something." He pulled the door to behind him, and at the last moment, ducked his head back round. "Lock this." He said, tapping the door, and he was gone.

I did as he asked, locking the front door and checking the back door and all the windows before sitting down at the table and _finally _allowing myself to think about what he had just said.

"Pale and bloodless."

_"Oh fuck no."_

That was it. The last straw. My mind simply couldn't take any more right now, and the edges of my vision blurred and darkened. As a passed out onto the floor I simply said

"Victoria".

**There. It took some wrestling, but I finally got the character at to co-operated and do as I asked. So now I'm back on track, and where I'd planned to be 2 chapters ago. :0)**


	11. Chapter 10: Waves and Wandering Minds

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit**.

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Chapter 10: Waves and Wandering Minds. 

It was dark when I woke, sprawled on the kitchen floor, and with what felt like a large bruise forming over my left cheekbone. It was my cell phone ringing that woke me, and I slowly pushed myself up til I could reach it where it lay on the table.

"Hello?" I mumbled into the handset, dragging myself off the floor with one hand on a nearby chair.

"Bells, it me" Charlie's voice seemed overloud in my ear, and I pulled the phone slightly away from me before he could continue. "I'm just checking in to make sure you're ok. I'll be home in another three or four hours, but I don't want you waiting up for me. Just head off to bed, and I'll look in on you when I get back."

"You found the hiker then?" I asked. "Are they ok?" I started trudging up the stairs so I could go check on my cheek in the bathroom mirror.

"No Bells, I'm afraid he's not. We found his body about half an hour ago, in the forest near to the Rez. Looks like another animal attack, but this time we had a witness who said they'd seen a huge bear through the trees, so at least we've got _something_ to go on, finally." He sounded so tired and sad. Charlie took his responsibilities towards the safety of the community very seriously, and any life lost always hit him hard. My relief at hearing that this was a bear attack, and nothing to do with Victoria, however was hard to contain. I didn't want him to think I was uncaring of the life that had been lost, but only a few hours ago I'd thought that a feral vampire was in the area, determined to take my life, and any that stood between her and me, so now I felt as if a ton of weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

"Well I'm sorry you guys couldn't find him before the bear got him, Dad, but I'm glad you've got something to explain all the missing persons. If you're still out there in the woods, please do me a favour and be careful?" I dreaded the thought of the bear getting his claws and teeth into Charlie, without him I was completely lost. I'd slip back into my pit, and I wouldn't even fight it.

"Of course, kid. But there's no chance of it coming back here right now. There are so many people here, with floodlights and loud generators running them, I'd be willing to bet that bear's miles away right now." There was a muffled voice in the background calling for him. "I've got to go, Bells. You go on to bed, and I'll look in on you when I get back in, like I said. Night."

"Night, Dad" I replied, and hit the end button on my phone.

I stared at my reflection in the mirror. A large, ugly bruise was already forming on my left cheek, and it looked like it might even turn into a black eye.

"Wonderful." I told my reflection. "How are you going to explain _that_ to Charlie?" I gave myself a warning glance "And _without_ lying?" My determination to be as truthful as possible with Charlie remained. I wasn't going to show him the disrespect of making up far-fetched tales to cover up relatively minor things like this anymore. Telling him the whole truth about vampires was, of course, still out of the question. It would put him in far too much danger if he knew everything about that - it gave literal meaning to the phrase 'what he doesn't know, won't hurt him - but surely I could tell him most of the truth when it came to explaining other things.

I was too tired to shower before bed. The burden of all the events of the last two days dragged on me like weights tied round my neck. I felt like an old woman of eighty instead of an eighteen year old, not only in body, but in mind too. My brain was reeling with all the millions of thoughts bustling against each other inside, each clamouring for my attention like a class of spoilt children, all screaming "look at me, look at me!" The only thing I could do was to try to get some decent sleep, and hope that in the morning I was rested enough to sort through the hodgepodge.

Charlie hadn't yet got home when I woke, screaming, from my usual nightmare. The echoing silence of the house built on the disquiet and loneliness of the dream, and it took me a long time to settle my breathing down enough to even begin to try sleeping again. Lying there in my bed, staring at the shadows cast by the trees on my ceiling, while I forced myself into slower, more even breaths, I tried to imagine the sound of the sea in the background. Each crashing wave a breath out, the dragging sound of sand and pebbles being sucked back as the wave retreated, a breath in. The exercise was relaxing and I could feel all my tense muscles easing and turning to jelly. Eventually, my eyes began to droop and I slid back under into sleep.

Screaming, fighting, fear, vampires, wolves, blood, sweat, sex, lust, my dream scenes ran through my mind, jolting me awake once more a few hours later, but I refused to even think on them for a second, punching my pillow a few times and stubbornly rolling over with my eyes clenched shut still. For once, it seemed, I got my way. I didn't wake again until late morning, the sounds of Charlie watching some ball game downstairs greeting me and making me smile.

I felt... Rested. I couldn't remember the last time I'd experienced that feeling, and I lay there, stretching luxuriantly in my bed, revelling in the fleeting moment of peaceful relaxation. Sadly, there's only so long a bladder can hold before its demands are un-ignorable, and so I forced myself out of bed and shambled off to the bathroom, grumbling about the stupid plumbing system of the human body. Catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror as I washed my hands, I winced at the very large, very dark bruise which now encompassed the left of my face, from halfway down my cheek, to the lower lid of my eye. _"Well no-one can say I didn't do a proper job of this one."_ I mused, and I jumped straight in the shower to stall going down and letting Charlie see what I'd managed to do to myself. I washed and deep conditioned my hair, shaved every are I could think of, and exfoliated myself to within an inch of my life, but eventually I ran out of stalling tactics, and headed back to my room to get dressed. As I passed the stairs, I called down.

"Morning, Dad. Do you mind if I grab a..." I broke off, seeing a blue plaid shied hanging from my door handle. "Never mind. Thanks dad!" I pulled the shirt off the hanger and disappeared into my room to get dressed.

As I expected, Charlie noticed my new facial decoration in about three seconds.

"What happened there?" He asked in a deceptively calm tone, his face belying it with his tense eyes and jaw.

"I fell last night and must've cracked my face on either the floor, or the table on the way down." I said truthfully avoiding the _reason_ for falling down in the first place.

"Hmm. Well please be more careful. And you should've called me to let me know."

"Sorry, Dad. I figured you ha enough to worry about last night." He nodded, but added.

"Ok, Bells. and maybe you're right; I did have a lot on my plate last night. But I still like knowing what's going on this you too, ok" i swiftly agreed, glad to end the conversation, and flopped down next to him on the couch.

Charlie and I spent most of the morning just hanging out together in front of the tv. I wasn't really watching; in fact I wasn't even entirely sure what sort of ball game was playing, but I nonetheless revelled in the quiet companionship and normalcy of the morning. As we sat together in the kitchen, eating the soup I'd heated up for lunch, Charlie explained that he had to go down to the station that afternoon to meet with the dead hiker's family and file the coroner's report.

"Sorry, kid, but it's got to be done, and it's my job to do it. Will you be ok by yourself for the afternoon?"

"Yeah, of course." I reassured him. "Actually I was thinking I might head down to First Beach again for a while. I find it so peaceful there, and it helps stop my mind from running at a million miles per hour. Maybe I can get some thinking done, and soak up a little sun wile I'm at it." The sun had indeed made a rare appearance. It was still cold, and likely to be pretty windy at the beach, but really that was all to the good for my purposes; it reduced the chance of other people being out there, and I had in mind a visit to that shelter in the hollow of the fallen tree I'd spotted last time we walked on the beach. I figured I could sit there pretty much as long as I liked, and no-one would spot me. Peace and quiet, and that balanced feeling I always got at First Beach seemed like the perfect thing for me right now.

"Ok then kid, but do me a favour and stay away of the forest? I know you're unlikely to go walking in the woods anyway, but right now, with this rogue bear on the loose, I really don't want you even close to the edge of the forest, ok?" I reassured him that I'd do as he asked, and we both left the house together. Charlie headed towards the station, and I turned my truck towards La Push.

Despite the sunshine, the beach had been kept pretty much deserted by the biting wind, the only exceptions being a few brave souls braving the conditions to surf the resulting breakers. I parked my truck at Billy's being more confident I could find my way alone to the beach from there, and grabbed Charlie's Forks PD hoodie from the passenger seat. Pulling it on, I headed down to the beach, tucking my hair inside the hood, and pulling the hood down to protect my face from the cutting gusts blowing in from the sea. It didn't take me long to find my new thinking spot, and as I pushed a few dangling roots to one side to peer into the hollow, I discovered it was even better than I'd hoped. The prevailing winds had blown sand into the hollow where, protected from the rain by the mass of roots hanging over it, it had dried out, making a soft, dry drift, ideal for sitting on. I ducked under the roots and sat down with my back to the root system, facing the sea. The moment I sat down, the wind was cut off completely, the only sign of it being the sound of it as it whipped by, and the waving of the angling roots above. Perfect. I wriggled my ass more firmly into the sand, creating a sort of sandy armchair for myself, and laid my head back. _"This really is the perfect spot to escape the world for a while, and find myself some balance."_ I thought, revelling in the peace.

Determined not to send my thoughts reeling again as they had been the night before, I simply sat there, allowing my thoughts to drift in and out as they pleased, like wild birds visiting a feeding table. If they chose to land and stop a while, I'd have a closer look at them, but the ones that just hovered nearby or landed for a second only to flit off; well I wasn't going to chase them down. I wondered idly what it would be like at school the next day. How would my class mates react to me no longer being on autopilot? Would they just go back to how things were before? Would they just ignore me? _Would they even notice_? I was fairly sure that pretty much everyone would notice some change at least. Apart from anything else, I was a hell of a lot cleaner than I had been a couple of days before, and besides that, I was alert and responsive, the dark shadows under my eyes had lifted following two nights in a row containing proper, restful sleep, and while, of course, there was no real visible sign of me putting weight on, I still looked just _healthier_ than I had done, and the mere act of me eating would be sure to garner a little interest at least. I gave a little snort of amusement as I suddenly considered "_I wonder how Mike Newton's going to play things tomorrow? Will he play up the 'Bella's a filthy harlot who tried to jump me in the stock room' angle, or will he be a decent guy and tell the truth?"_ Whichever he chose, I decided that I wouldn't be drawn into any arguments over Mrs Newton's lying gossip. I planned to rise above it all and keep my moral high ground. Well as long as my shiny new temper allowed me to, anyway. I let the thought drift away and without thinking about it, I matched my breathing to the incoming and outgoing waves, much like I had in my imagination the night before.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

The rhythm relaxed me completely and again I felt my muscles turn to jelly as I sat/laid there in my sandy armchair. My mind was free to meander as it pleased and I couldn't say how long I remained like that when something popped into the forefront of my head of it's own volition.

_"Taha Aki. That's the old man in my dreams. The first spirit wolf in the legends."_ I didn't need the right feeling that floated across my skin to know I had hit on the correct answer, but it was a nice feeling just the same. Somewhere in the very tiny portion of my brain that was still slightly alert, I was relieved that I wouldn't have to get the book I knew was still on my shelf and research the name; I didn't want to have to remind myself of the treaty and therefore the Cullens if I could avoid it.

That same, tiny part of my brain registered surprise that I just thought of the Cullen name without it making my chest twinge with pain. My body and mind were too relaxed to register it, if indeed it had twinged. _"Maybe here and now, in this relaxed frame of mind is the right time to give it some thought then."_

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

I allowed myself to continue the memory uninterrupted, for once not worried about inflicting pain on myself. I remembered Carlisle telling me about making the treaty with the last of the shape shifter clan, it was a part of the conversation we'd had as he stitched my arm up on my birthday. My memory of the conversation came to life, playing in my mind like a private screening of a movie. I was just a spectator, not a participant, and also had no intention of thinking of _His_ name, and this reassurance and separation from myself removed any lingering worry that tiny active part of my mind had about the memory causing me pain.

Carlisle stood in front of Bella, as she sat on his desk in his office. Beside her on the table was a small collection of medical instruments and a small metal bowl holding the little pieces of glass Carlisle was removing from her cut. Carlisle was explaining to Bella how soul bonds worked for all sentient beings, how werewolves, vampires, shape shifters and humans completed their soul bonds, and made both mates stronger in doing so. He was telling Bella about how souls should be imagined as having a shape, with unimaginably tiny ridges and furrows, and when a soul met it's mate, their two shapes matched up perfectly, locking together with absolute precision, the join between the two almost indistinguishable. Bella was asking if Carlisle believed that her and ... _Him_ were soul mates, and Carlisle was saying that yes, he believed they were, but that until the bond was completed through the sharing of fluids both via sex and via a bite, as Bella aged and experienced different things in her life, her soul would change shape and at some point would no longer be the perfect match for ... _His_. _His_ wouldn't change short of a huge event forcing it to, because, as a vampire _His_ soul's shape was as frozen as the rest of him. As Carlisle was finishing stitching Bella's wound, he told her that all supernatural species completed their bonds in much the same way, and that once this act was complete, the join between the two souls was not just indistinguishable, it was non-existant. The two souls were literally fused together. The sum greater than the two parts.

The memory pretty much complete, my mind allowed it to drift away.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

The alert part of my mind gave me a gentle nudge, and I ignored it, content in my drowsy, dreamlike state. It gave a stronger nudge, and I felt a small crease form in my forehead as irritation washed over my deep relaxation. A _much_ stronger, physical nudge came this time, and I allowed the alert part of my brain to remind me that it couldn't physically touch me, so someone else must've done. My return from my relaxed state was so sudden, it was almost painful, as my muscled stopped being jelly and became muscles once again.

IN.

The breath came as a huge, choking gasp as my eyes focused and met, just a couple of inches in front of me, with a pair of dark brown, almost black eyes belonging to Sam.

"BELLA!... Oh! Thank fuck for that! Are you ok, Bella? Have you taken something?" I was filled with indignation.

"No! Of course not! Shit. Can't a girl have a little nap in a warm cozy spot without being scared half to death?" I snapped at him, trying to push him back. All I achieved was shoving myself back into the root system behind me, Sam didn't budge an inch. He raised an eyebrow.

"You always nap with your eyes wide open and staring?" He asked.

"I don't know what to tell you, Sam. I was minding my own business, thinking and relaxing, listening to the waves, I fell asleep and was dreaming when _someone_" I glared hard at him "shoved me and woke me up." His face held a mixture of confusion, disbelief, and amusement at my little tirade. He took a couple of steps back, standing up outside my shelter, and holding back the dangling roots that were dancing in the wind.

"Well I'm very sorry, Miss Swan. I didn't mean to _wake_ you." His sarcastic stress on the word 'wake' was clear, "It's getting dark, so maybe me waking you from your _nap_" again with the sarcasm "was a good thing. Wouldn't want the Chief worrying about you." Despite my extreme annoyance at him, I couldn't escape the fact that he was right. I'd been in my little hollow much longer than I'd intended, and I had no desire to cause Charlie any worry.

"Damn him. Can't he at least have the good grace to be wrong when he's being this annoying?" I groused to myself under my breath, and gave him another glare, which increased in strength as I found him already sniggering behind his hand at something.

"Fine. I'll just be going then." I grumbled, pulling at one of the roots above me to haul myself to my feet, only to have the root pull free, dumping me unceremoniously back on my ass. He laughed outright at this, and put a hand out for me to grab.

"Here, I'll help you up." I took hold of his huge, hot hand, and he pulled me to my feet.

"Thanks." I muttered with bad grace, and pulled the hood back over my head, tucking my hair inside it before stepping out into the wind.

"Come on, I'll walk you back to your truck." He offered, and if it weren't for him being such an excellent wind break, I might have refused, but the wind had really picked up, and walking with him there to shelter me a little would certainly be much easier.

"I'm parked up by Billy Black's place." I told him, and he gestured with his head, a sort of chin jerk, which clearly meant 'let's go then'. And so we did. Me with my hands jammed in my pockets, and my head down so I could watch my feet and at least avoid the indignation of tripping as we walked along.

"So why were you holed up under a fallen tree, _napping_?" Sam asked me, and while I ignored the sarcasm, my eyes narrowed for the cover of my hood at his cheek.

"I noticed the spot the other day when I was walking with Charlie, and when I needed peace and a place to think today, it just sprang to mind. Why? Is it a problem me being there?" I asked, hoping that there wouldn't be an issue over it. I liked my new spot, and didn't want to have to give it up.

"No, no, it's fine, Bella. I was just wondering, that's all" he held up his hands at my defensive tone. We reached the truck a moment later and I lifted my face from the ground to say goodbye. The wind instantly tore my hood back and set my hair to whipping about my face. I ran my hands through it and pulled it back behind my head. Suddenly, Sam's fingers gripped my chin, and he gently but firmly turned my head to the right. A sound I could almost categorise as a growl left him.

"What's this? Who hurt you?" He demanded angrily, his body tense and shaking, though his fingers were still gentle on my face. I pulled back a little, unaccustomed to physical contact from someone I'd didn't know too well.

"That'd be my kitchen floor." I shrugged. "I fell last night and smacked my face against it pretty hard." He stared at my face for a moment, obviously searching for the truth of my statement. Satisfied, he gave a small smile.

"Well hell, Bella. Try not to put dents in the floor over there, won't you?" I gave him a smile back.

"Ok. I'll make. Point of trying." I agreed. I unlocked my truck, and went to climb in. "You need a lift anywhere?" I offered, but he shook his head.

"No thanks, I'm just stopping in to talk to Billy for a bit. You take care now. Oh! And thanks again for dinner last night. Jared won't stop going on about how awesome your lasagne is. I swear the guy is probably off somewhere right no writing sonnets to it." I chuckled at the thought.

"Well I look forward to hearing them. Bye Sam." I climbed into my truck and turned over the engine, the load roar cutting though the noise of the wind outside.

I was so distracted by my weird conversation with Sam, that I was halfway home before I realised that I was still holding a lot of that peaceful feeling I'd found at the beach, and I was pulling up outside the house before I realised that I'd been thinking about the Cullens - even if I had avoided _His_ name - I had remembered the conversation with Carlise which I had been avoiding the memory of, and it hadn't caused my chest any pain at all.

**I'm not 100% happy with the way I've described Bella remembering the conversation with Carlisle, but I had to do it in a way that wouldn't send her back into her "pit" and this was the only way I could see it working. Let me know what you think?**


	12. Chapter 11: Scents and Scandals

**So it's time for another try at Sam's POV. it seemed to flow a little easier this time, so here's hoping it reads well too. **

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

* * *

Chapter 11: Scents and Scandals

Sam POV

I'd always hated grocery shopping.  
Not 'hate' like some people hate sprouts, or Mondays, or finding out that their new pants that they love wearing are dry clean only. I really _hated_ it. I'd never had many things in this world that I truly hated; Vampires, of course topped the list, followed closely by what I did to Leah and myself when I first phased, people who don't know the difference between 'they're', 'their', and 'there', and who say 'could of', instead of 'could have', and then grocery shopping.  
Unfortunately, with the amount that the pack would eat, grocery shopping was a frequent necessity, and while I probably could've just delegated the job to Paul or Jared every time, it helped to allay suspicions about us if we rotated, and also alternated between the supermarket in Forks and the Rez store. Shopping carts as full as ours being bought by the same person in the same store every three or four days would be sure to be commented on by the local gossips before long.

It was my turn to do the grocery shopping though, so I was spending my Saturday afternoon pushing a cart, piled so I high I could barely steer it, through the aisles of the supermarket in Forks. As I wrestled the damn thing down the chips and snacks aisle, I heard a few older ladies in the next aisle gossiping excitedly in hushed tones.  
"I never would have believed it of her myself, but Dianne Newton told me that she walked in on it herself. The Swan girl had poor Michael backed up against the wall in the stock room, her hand shoved down his pants. Dianne tells me that Michael was nearly in tears. Apparently he's been fending her off for months, but the little tart won't take 'no' for an answer. He told Dianne that she's slept with the vast majority of the boys at the high school, and pretty much all of them at La Push. The girl's a walking STD, he says." The shocked gasps of the other women didn't really ring true in my opinion; they sounded more thrilled than appalled, and having had first hand experience at the hands of small town gossips I knew that the women in the next aisle were far more invested in hearing more, embellishing it at their leisure, and passing it on than they were invested in hearing true facts. I stopped in my tracks and listened as they continued with their character assassination.  
"You know, I believe I've heard similar things myself." A second woman interjected excitedly. "I also heard," she added in a confiding tone, "that the sudden departure of the Cullen family was less to do with the Dr getting a new job offer, and more due to a certain girl being found in a compromising position with _both_ of the youngest boy's brothers." She said with completely insincere distaste. "_At the same time!_" The shrieks of gleeful horror from the other women at this "fact" actually made me gag in disgust. Literally.  
"Yes, well I don't know about _that_," another woman, one with apparently a modicum of decency, said quietly, and with genuine sadness "but I _do_ know that Dianne told me that when she asked the Swan girl what she thought she was doing, she was treated to an absolute barrage of abuse and curse words, and Dianne felt she had no option but to fire the girl on the spot. I've known the girl and her father all my life, my husband was the one to recommend him for the position as Chief, as you know, and I never thought she'd turn out like this." _"Ah. That must be Mrs Green."_ I realised. She, at least, didn't seem happy to hear the gossip. Although she was still passing it on. The first woman jumped back in excitedly.  
"Well Dianne told _me_ that her Michael told _her_, that apparently the little slut was heavily into drugs, and that she left Phoenix so suddenly, and in the middle of the school year, under the cloud of a _pregnancy scare._ It seems she's not learned her lesson." The others all tutted and 'hmmed' with smug self satisfaction as I fumed on the other side of the shelves. _"How dare they spread such malicious shit?"_ My hands clenched on the side of the shopping cart. The girl was already fighting against heartbreak, anyone who had seen her since the Cullens left could see she was in a desperately bad way, and for all of this to be breaking now, when she was just beginning to pull herself back together? Well it might just break her completely.

I was completely unconcerned as to whether there was any grain of truth in amongst the garbage they were spouting; it was Bella's business, not mine, and _certainly not theirs_. It was also completely besides the point. The part about drugs, if true, I disapproved of personally, but not only did I not believe it was true, not for a second - not with the Chief for a father - but also, I'd been brought up to believe that everyone deserved a chance to change if they could, and whatever Bella had left behind in Phoenix, should stay there.  
A sudden breeze from the direction of the store entrance announced the enticing scent of the worst possible person who could come in at that moment, though from the smell of it, at least she had her father with her for support. My wolf sat up and begged as he recognised her unique, delicious odour, _"Seriously? What is it with him at her scent?"_ and I froze for a moment, undecided as to what to do.  
"I don't believe it." The first woman spoke up again. "How she can have the nerve to show her face in public, amongst decent people, is beyond me." She spat with venom. "And in my store, too. I've got half a mind to ban her from the place."  
_"Lady, you've got half a mind, __**period**__"_ I thought, with a snort, and I turned to head to the end of the aisle, resolved to keep an eye out for Bella and the Chief, and step in if I thought they might need my help.

The gossips, it seemed, weren't quite brave enough to actually confront Bella, which I was even more relieved about when I saw that in fact the Chief _wasn't_ with her. His scent was on her because she was once again wearing one of his shirts over her own band t-shirt, not because he was accompanying her to the store. Bella was, however, given a number of flat glares and disapproving, under the breath 'tuts', as she roamed the aisles, filling her cart. She kept a calm, pleasant expression on her face, though with my enhanced vision, I could see the tiny tell tale signs that she wasn't as unconcerned as she appeared to be._ "Brave girl." _I remembered thinking the same thing the previous day; she was obviously stronger than her frail appearance would suggest. After refusing to acknowledge the first few glares, she seemed to up her game, offering bright smiles in return for each disapproving look, and even a couple of cheery "Good afternoon"s. I even saw a tiny smile curl one side of her mouth a fraction as she noted how much her unconcern annoyed the vicious biddies. _"That's the way, Bella. You show those bitches!"_ I silently cheered her on. I trailed her throughout her entire visit to the store, more and more impressed with her handling of the situation, and kept carefully out of sight as she walked to the checkout to pay.  
"Hi, Mrs Green. How are you?" She asked and as she noticed the glare she got in reply, the smile dropped off her face. She quickly forced it back though, and continued as if she hadn't noticed, busying herself with packing her groceries away into brown bags. When she looked up to pay, and saw Mrs Green placing a big box of condoms in the last bag, she looked completely confused. "_I guess she didn't add those herself then." _  
Seeing Bella's confused expression, mrs Green spoke up, disappointing me in my thoughts that she was at least a _little_ better than the other gossips.  
"I figured you should probably stock up, _dear_, if you're going to keep throwing yourself at young men the way Mrs Newton caught you throwing yourself at her Mike in her stock room this afternoon." Her voice dripped poison. "The poor dear didn't know how to deal with the situation as he'd already turned you down on several occasions. If you're so anxious to sleep with every single male in town, you'd best start to use protection. For their sakes, if not for yours."  
Bella stood stock still for a few seconds, her eyes wide with shock, and her mouth hanging open. _"Oh fuck! she hadn't even known exactly what the gossip was; only that there was gossip. The poor girl's going to completely fall apart!" _I started forward, determined to help her maintain at least a shred of dignity in front of these revolting people.

Everyone around the checkouts had fallen silent, a school of piranhas eagerly awaiting the first drops of blood to begin their feast, and then breaking the silence I heard the last thing I had expected. Bella Swan, all 5'4" and maybe 95 pounds of her, was standing in front of all those hateful, vicious bullying gossips, and _laughing her fucking tits _off! _"Forget 'brave girl'. She's a fucking warrior," _I thought in awe._ "The chief would be so proud of her right now. Hell, I hardly know her and I'm proud of her right now."_  
"S. s. s. seriously? That's what she went with? Throwing myself at her son in the stock room?" Bella grabbed at the counter to hold herself up. "Oh, and don't tell me, she walked in and caught me, and had to rescue her poor innocent son from my clutches?" She threw her head back with another burst of laughter, wild and beautiful as her hair flew back behind her shoulders.  
"Like you don't already know." Another lady - from her voice, it was the one spreading that shit about Bella indulging in a Cullen sandwich with the hulk leech and the scarred leech - spat under her breath from behind the other till, but I noticed that Mrs Green was looking like she'd realised she'd made a pretty big mistake in believing what she'd heard. Bella wasn't going to allow the other nasty bitch the satisfaction of getting the better of her it seemed, and she turned and replied to the biddy;  
"Yeah, ok. So I went from being a total shut in two days ago, and don't pretend you don't know about that, to _'The Great Floozie of Forks' _today. When was I supposed to be seducing all these men?" Bella's laughter was starting to take on a worryingly hysterical edge, and I readied myself to step in if she lost her hold over herself.  
"You lot are all so desperate to believe bad things about me, feel free." She snorted "While you're at it, here's a few freebies. When I was six, I cut a little girl's hair off in class, cos she was hitting people with her braid on purpose. When I was eight, I stole a pack of gum, then took it back half an hour later and confessed cos I felt so guilty. Oh! Yeah, and one time I tipped out all of my dad's bait when we were out fishing cos I was cold and bored and wanted to go home, then I pretended I'd tripped over the bait bucket by accident." I couldn't help a laugh of my own as Bella listed her 'heinous crimes' for all to hear. Everyone in the store had done that much, and most of us much worse in our time. it seemed that Mrs Green agreed, as she joined in the laughter.  
"I'm sorry, Bella. I should have known you better. In all the years I've known you and your father, you've never been that sort of girl. I don't know what I was thinking." She apologised sincerely. _"I guess that redeems her part in this a little." _I thought grudgingly. At least she had the courage to speak up in front of her friends and apologise.  
"Doesn't matter, Mrs Green. People make mistakes, I don't hold it against them." Bella was too forgiving in my opinion, but I guessed it was her choice. Mrs Green's apology seemed to help Bella regain a little control, and she managed to put a stop to her laughing fit. She turned to the little crowd that had, by now, gathered round her at the checkout. "What _actually_ happened, for those that care more about the truth than idle gossip and slander, is that Mrs Newton was bad mouthing the police and their efforts towards finding the missing hikers." She boldly stared at one face at a time, unerringly picking out the gossips from the rest of the crowd. "I got mad, which I probably shouldn't have done, questioned why she didn't have any missing posters up for the hikers, or any flyers on the counter, and when she said it was because it would be bad for business, I shot my mouth off a bit, quit, and walked out. Not a very exciting tale, but of course there was no way you were going to hear any of that from her as it would make her look bad." She shrugged and turned to Mrs Green. "I guess she was relying on the fact that lately I've barely communicated with my own dad, let alone anyone else, and so she thought she could spread whatever lies she chose and I wouldn't say anything different. Well. She was wrong."  
_"So that's what started his all off? That Dianne Newton is an evil mare! Spreading all that shit about someone just to save face a little. And to deliberately not help out in some small way over the missing hikers so she could keep turning over her usual number of bucks. Greedy, selfish, evil __**bitch**__!" _The worst part of Mrs Newton's inactivity regarding the missing hikers was that without knowing there was a possibility of danger in the forest, more hikers were wandering about in there, getting attacked, and making the job of the pack that much harder. She was all but sending an all-you-can-eat-buffet into the woods, endangering my pack every time we had to protect one of them. I caught myself growling and forced the noise to stop before someone noticed. My hands were shaking too, and tightened my grip on the cart to make them cease. Phasing in the middle of the Forks supermarket wasn't high on my 'to-do' list.

Looking back at Bella, I saw her contemplating her grocery bags. She was stuck. If she wanted a dignified exit, she'd have to leave them, asking for help or making a return trip would ruin all her brilliant work so far.

Abandoning my cart full of groceries, I quickly strode up behind Bella and reached over her to gather up all of her bags except the one she already held.  
"Fantastic job, Bella. Now allow me to assist you in your grand exit." She looked up at me with a grateful smile.  
"Thanks, Sam. Perfect timing." We turned towards the exit and walked together to the door and I bent down to whisper in her ear.  
"Are we leaving with, or without a one fingered salute?" She gave a little giggled and seemed to give it a bit of thought.  
"Without I think." She heaved a sigh. "At the moment I have the moral high ground. I probably shouldn't give it up for a rude gesture." She smirked a little "No matter how much they deserve it." I gave her an appreciative grin and her eyes widened for some reason. Out of nowhere, she tripped and I quickly shifted all the grocery bags in my arms so I could grab her elbow before she could face plant where they could all see.  
"Careful, Bella. Wouldn't want to ruin that dignified exit." I joked, and she nodded at me.

We headed over to her truck and put the grocery bags on the passenger side of the seat when she unlocked the door.  
"Thanks again, Sam. I really appreciate the help."  
"Of course." I shrugged "You seriously handled all of that so well. I couldn't do anything else but help you out. You're doing good, Bella. Charlie will be so proud of you when he hears about this. And you know he _will_ hear about it. That was a good half of the Forks gossip brigade you just set in their places. Someone's bound to fill him in, and probably pretty quickly too." Knowing I was right, she quickly unlocked the driver's door and scrambled into her truck.  
"Good point. I'd better shift it if I want to get to him before the gossips" She said, and chucked the single grocery bag she held over with the others.  
The pack of condoms fell out of the bag and landed at my feet. I looked down at them, idly wondering for a few seconds why she'd kept them. Who she was planning on banging. The thought bothered me for some reason and I frowned a little, then looked up at Bella, then my laughter started. She was so embarrassed! I'd never seen anyone's face get so red, so fast. Bella banged her head against the steering wheel and hid her face in her arms.  
"Oh for fuck's sake. In front of the hot bodied guy? Kill me now. Seriously. Just open up the ground, and swallow me and my truck. Please, God, you'd be doing me a huge favour." She though it was hot bodied? even through my laughter, i preened a little. I got the impression she thought she was only saying this inside her own head. My laughter doubled.  
"Did you know you're saying that out loud?" I chuckled, and to my surprise, she managed to turn even redder.  
"Shit." She banged her head once more against the steering wheel. She turned to look at me, her head still resting on the wheel.  
"Well _that_ was embarrassing." She stated obviously. "Any chance you could just pretend that I just walked with dignity from the store, climbed into my truck, thanked you politely and drove off?" She almost begged me.  
"Wellllllll" enjoying myself immensely, I dragged the word out, deliberately making her think I was debating it. She began to bang her head again, but I couldn't have that; she'd hurt herself if she kept it up. Moving inhumanly fast while she wasn't looking, I reached across from the passenger side and shoved my hand between her head and the wheel, protecting her forehead.  
"Careful, you don't want a huge bruise there" I murmured, her face was just a couple of inches from my own, my nose was full of her incredible scent. My wolf wanted to roll around in it like a Jack Russell terrier in a pile of fox shit._ "Weird."_  
"Ok. I'll give you a pass on this one. It never happened." I gave in. She smiled gratefully at me and I grinned back. I let my grin turn a little evil. "But now you owe me." Winking at her, I pulled back and closed the passenger door. I gave her a quick wave, and strode off back into the store as she drove off quickly; I had my own quick mission to accomplish.

I found my abandoned cart and took it to the checkout, deliberately waiting in the longer queue so I could be served by the owner, who was still muttering nasty little insults aimed at Bella, and obviously planning what she would do to make Bella pay for talking back to her. Finally it was my turn to be served, and I waited patiently as she rang everything through, the bill coming to nearly $200. When she looked expectantly at me for the money I gave her a bright smile and said in a loud, carrying voice;  
"Oh I don't want to actually _buy_ all this... Well actually I _do_, just not from an evil, bullying, gossip like _you_. I really just wanted you to total it all up so you could see just how much money I _won't_ be spending in your store every week. And neither will either of my work mates who, I'm sure you know, usually spend about the same." It looked like the pack would be doing all of our grocery shopping in the Rez store from now on. My grin turned feral. "In fact,_ as Chief of my tribe, _I'm suddenly realising I should encourage my people to keep their money to the Rez as much as possible." I looked around, noticing that several other members of the vicious little pack of gossiping biddies were the owners of businesses in Forks. "I _do so_ hope that won't put a dent in any of your profits, ladies. After all, then you'd all have to work that much harder, and might find yourselves short on time you could be using to spread nasty little lies about other people behind their backs. Well." I clapped my hands together once, loudly, "I guess I'll be off. I've got a couple hundred people to chat to about the new tribal policy on spending outside the Rez. Ta ta." I raised my hand and wiggled my fingers at the store owner in the most sarcastic wave I could muster, turned and strode back out of the store, grinning fit to split my face.

* * *

Repeating my entire grocery shop at the store on the Rez was a real (for me) trauma. When I got back to my place I found Jared and Paul lounging around in my sitting room.

"Make yourselves useful and put this lot away." I said, dumping the bags on my kitchen table and making my way into the sitting room to flop down on the couch. I was too restless though and after a moment I got up again and began pacing.

"What's got your panties in a bunch, Boss?" Paul asked, coming back into the room and throwing himself down in a chair. Jared strolled in behind him and leaned against the wall.

"I'm going commando, just like you, and for the hundredth time, Paul, don't call me Boss" I growled.

"In answer to your question though, nothing's 'got my panties in a bunch'. I'm just too full of adrenaline to sit still." They both tensed.

"Why? What happened? Was it the red headed leech again?" Jared demanded.

"No no. Nothing like that. No vampires. Just people. There are some seriously nasty pieces of work living in Forks, and it's not always the ones you expect." They looked confused at my cryptic answer, so I tried to explain. "I was in the store in Forks and..." I stopped. "Hold on. I've got a better idea. Come outside and phase. I'll show you. It'll be quicker than explaining it and you'll understand it better that way anyway." That was one of the big advantages and disadvantages of the pack mind. Not only could we _see_ and _hear_ what each other was thinking, but we could _feel_ the emotions of the others too. It helped us understand each other so much. We might not agree with the emotions we felt from each other, but it helped us to understand where one another was coming from on a lot of issues. They both followed me out of the house and around back, where we would remain unseen by any passers by, and we all stripped and phased.

_"Look." _I showed them my entire trip to the Forks supermarket, from first hearing the nasty gossips, to my final sarcastic finger wiggling wave and triumphant exit.

_"Fuck me. Those are some lovely people, right there." _Jared's tone dripped sarcasm_. "But I've got to say damn, that Bella Swan's a strong one to handle all that so well. Who'd have thought it from someone so tiny?" _He compared the brief memory he had of her from just a couple of weeks after she first came back to Forks, with my memory of her from the store._ "Holy shit, dude. What the hell happened to her? Has she got cancer or something? She must've lost about twenty pounds. You think she's got an eating disorder or something?" _

_"Bad, isn't it?" _I said_ "but she looks better than she did yesterday." _I showed them the memory of her from the previous day, the huge bruise-like bags under her eyes, the drawn, dry skin, I even showed them her weird panic attack.

_'Yeah. I see what you mean." _Jared agreed._ "She at least looks like she got some sleep last night. But still..." _Jared was cut off by Paul jumping in angrily.

_"What the fuck is all this shit about? Who the hell cares? So the little leech lover managed to hold her own against the Forks biddy brigade. Big deal. She deserves whatever she's got coming to her anyway for fraternising with vampires. In my opinion there's no smoke without fire. Even if she's not been doing the same here, I'd be willing to bet she slept her way through half her school back in Phoenix, so if the gossip caught up with her she deserves that too. No way you're telling me that a girl who looks like she does, or did before the leeches left anyway, hasn't had more than her share of boyfriends." _Paul was pacing back and forth in his anger, the grey fur of his hackles raised_. "And as for the drugs thing? I wouldnt be at all surprised. If she doesn't look like a heroin addict - pale, unhealthy skin, drastically underweight, bags under her eyes, long sleaved, baggy clothes and zoned out expression - then I don't know who does!" _I growled at him angrily.

_"That's not the point, Paul. _No-one_ deserves to have vicious rumours spread about behind their backs, especially not an already damaged young woman. You know, you've seen, how I feel about gossips and why. I don't care if she's sleeping with every guy from here to Seattle, that's her business and no-one else's." _I wasn't prepared for the flinch of pain that caused me, so I wasn't able to hide it from the others. _"And seriously, Paul? Heroin addict? Do you honestly think the Chief wouldn't catch onto that shit in a split second?" _Paul had made me so mad that had I not already been in wolf form, I would've phased instantly. Jared took the momentary pause in our argument to interject.

_"What I'm curious about, Sam, is your wolf's fascination with her scent. What's got him so excited that he wants to rub himself all over her?" _He paused to think for a moment, then leapt up in excitement._ "Did you imprint on Bella Swan, and somehow keep it from us." _Since Jared had imprinted himself, about two months before, on a girl in his class, he had been almost obsessed with seeing Paul and I join him in his perma-happy state. Paul froze, almost incandescent with rage at the thought, and I was quick to set them right.

_"No, of course not, Jared. Number one, I don't think that's even possible - dont the Elders say that imprinting is about genetics, about creating better wolves for the future? - She's not even native, so that rules that out. And number two ..." _I deliberately thought of every moment in which mine and Bella's eyes had met, to show them the proof_. "See? No earth moving, no gravity shift, no choirs of angels singing in the background. _Nothing_. I don't know what my wolf's issue is, but I'll tell you this. If I was able to choose freely for myself without having to worry about hurting the woman later on should I imprint, Bella Swan is _exactly_ the sort of woman I'd pick for myself. She's selfless, strong, loyal, forgiving and kind." _I flashed through memories showing examples of each of these qualities for them to see._ "And she may look pretty unwell right now, but she really is very beautiful when she's healthy." _A brief flash of Bella laughing today, head thrown back, face light and open, smooth white throat exposed, and sheets of thick wavy hair falling down her back like a mahogany waterfall, ran through mt mind_. "Hell, she has her moments even now." _Paul shot forward to stand so close to me that our muzzles were touching.

_"You've got to be kidding me." _He snarled in fury._ "Have you forgotten? Do I have to spell it out to you? She. Is. A. Leech. Lover. She fucks the undead. She's a necrophiliac. She likes to ride an icy, stone pole. She is the definition of _scum_" _My frail grip on my temper failed. Snarling and growling I leapt up, pinning Paul to the ground, his belly in the air, and his head turned to the side in submission. The Alpha tone rolled through my words.

_**"ENOUGH. Be silent, Paul."** _I continued on in my normal voice._ "I couldnt ever offer her a committed relationship, as Ive got no guarantee that I wouldn't imprint and have to leave her, and anyway, as of right now, she's in no way ready to think about dating, and I don't know if she ever will be, at least before she graduates and leaves for college. _But_ I do know, that if she ever is ready, and looking to date before she leaves, I would count myself very lucky to have the chance to date Bella. And I _will_ take that chance if it comes up. **And you, Paul Lahote, will show her some respect, or if you can't manage that simple task, you will keep your fucking mouth shut. Am I understood?"** _I issued the Alpha order with relish. Normally I hated the thought of removing Jared or Paul's free will, but on this occasion I was more than glad to do so. It was only a small measure of protection I could offer her, but I was determined that she would not be hurt by at least this one person. I hadn't actually planned on saying any of that about dating Bella, I'd not given the matter any conscious thought at all, it had just sort of spilled from my mouth all by itself, but now that I had said it, I found myself very pleased with the idea, and planned to follow up on it if the opportunity arose.

_"Let's have no more of this for now. Paul, you have patrol from now til midnight. Jared," _I turned at looked at him over my shoulder _"you and I have quotes to make at a couple of houses for repairs. We're due at the first one at 7:30, so lets phase back and grab what we need so we can head out."_ Paul scrambled to his feet and tore off through the woods to start his patrol like there were a hundred marriage minded women on his tail, and Jared and I shifted back and grabbed our clothes. As we climbed into my truck Jared grasped my elbow and pulled me to a stop.

"I don't want to piss you off, Sam, but you know that wolves are monogamous animals. They mate for life. Casual dating might really send your wolf for a loop. It might not work out, and I don't wanna see you hurt yourself trying to be with Bella even if its just for a short time." He swallowed and took a deep breath. "And I won't let you hurt her in the process either." He warned me with a wary expression, obviously worried about my response. I smiled. This was why he and I were so close. He really was a good guy. I was truly lucky to know him.

"I really hadn't thought about that, Jared. I wasn't planning on saying any of that, it just sort of said itself. But now I think about it, my wolf seems to like Bella a whole lot for some reason, I think it might actually work out. _But_ if it looks like its not going to, I'll make sure to back out of the situation before either of us are in too far. I don't want to see her hurt any more than you do." I clapped him on the shoulder and jerked my head towards the truck "Now come on. We've got a quote to make." I started the engine and turned to smirk at him. "At _Chief Swan'_s house."


	13. Chapter 12: Bloodsuckers & Bewilderment

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

* * *

Chapter 12: Bloodsuckers and Bewilderment

Sam POV

We hadn't even gotten out of the truck outside Chief Swan's house when he opened the front door and came out to meet us, leaving the door open behind him. Two wonderful scents wafted behind him from inside; One was, of course Bella's, and the other had my mouth watering in a completely different way. My stomach rumbled loudly, reminding me I'd not eaten since my early lunch, and begging me to find the source of that second smell and shove as much of it as I could manage down my throat. I climbed out of the truck, Jared following suit on the other side and walking round the front to join me just as the Chief got to us.

"Sam. Thanks for coming by." he said, holding his hand out to shake. "Oh, and Jared, isn't it? Jared Cameron?" When Jared nodded, he shook Jared's hand too, and then gestured to the side of the house. "The biggest job I need doing is stripping the old shutters off the windows on this side, where the damp is worse, and then replacing them all with new ones." He pointed out the tatty shutter to us, and we launched into a discussion about materials, paint colours, and timings. Inside, the house phone rang and whilst of course, the Chief couldn't hear a thing, Jared and I could hear every word on both sides of the call.

"Swan residence" Bella answered the call, her voice a little wary. I guessed she'd been either fielding calls from the town gossips wanting to pass on their lies to her father since she got home, or had been avoiding answering the phone at all for fear of the same thing.

"Hello there, dear. Is your father there?" Even with the distortion of the phone, I, and through my memories, Jared, recognised the voice as one of the biddies in the store earlier that day.

"Yes, he is, thanks." Bella replied, and hung up the phone, making Jared and I burst into surprised laughter. _"Nicely done."_ I thought appreciatively and then quickly excused our strange behaviour to the Chief, blaming a stupid inside joke Jared and I had just shared for our roars of laughter.

The Chief asked us to follow him inside to continue talking about the work that needed to be done, as the rain was beginning to worsen, and we followed him, still chuckling, to find Bella laying a fourth place at the kitchen table. I wondered who they were expecting for company, a little jealous both of the fact that someone else would be eating whatever smelled so delicious, and that someone else would be getting to spend time with Bella.

"Bells, this is Jared Cameron. He works with Sam." As the Chief introduced him, Jared held up a hand in greeting. She nodded at him politely.

"Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm Bella." She said, with a small smile, then looked at the Chief and asked "So are they joining us? Only it's all ready and I don't want it to get cold." The Chief looked at us questioningly. _"Awesome."_ I thought._ "I get to eat whatever smells so great, and I get an excuse to spend a little more time getting to know Bella. Perfect. Jared had better not balls this up."_

"You want to join us, guys?" The Chief asked. "Bells here makes the best lasagne you've ever tasted, and there's plenty to go around." I looked over at Jared, silently communicating a promise of slow death if he screwed up here. I needn't have worried; he was clearly just as eager to try some of Bella's cooking as it smelt so fantastic, and was almost as eager to get to know her a little in person, instead of just through my memories.

"That'd be great, yeah, if you're sure?" I sent a small smile to Bella, and she smiled back, saying;

"Really, it's fine. I made extras anyway, so please." We all sat together round the table and were just taking our first bites, when the phone made a horrible shrill tone to announce an open line and Bella jumped up to fix it. _"Ah. So that's how she's been avoiding the phone ringing off the hook. Clever. Simple but effective."_ I thought, just as the phone began to ring. I then fell quickly back to eating, partly because the food was so amazing I couldn't not eat, and partly to cover the fact that I was planning on listening in to the call.

"Stupid fucking busybodies" Bella grumbled under her breath, not realising Jared and I could hear her as clear as day. Jared barely caught his laugh in time to prevent suspicion, so I whacked him heavily on his back, disguising his laugh as choking on a mouthful. Easily believable with the rate at which he was devouring his lasagne.

"You ok?" Bella asked him, solicitously, and Jared nodded at her, his hand over his mouth to cover his laughing, and completing the charade that he had choked a little. Bella shrugged a little and then turned her head from us to glare at the phone in her hand.

"You gonna get that, kiddo, or shall I?" The Chief asked her and she spoke through gritted teeth.

"No. I'll get it." She took a breath and pressed the call button. "Swan residence"

"Put your father on the phone, you little tramp" Yep. Another member of the gossip brigade. I nearly let loose a growl at the vicious tone of voice, and the rude name she'd called Bella, and I felt Jared tense beside me.

"Sorry, he won't fit." Bella replied in a cool tone, without betraying a single hint of emotion, and then hanging up the phone and pressing what I guessed was the silent button. Jared and I both struggled to hold in the laughter this time, and Bella looked at us, confused, not realising that we had clearly heard both sides of the call. She shrugged, and sat down, turning to the Chief and saying. "Well I guess I'd better tell you what happened this afternoon before they start knocking at the door next." He looked baffled and asked

"Before who start knocking? Was there a problem at work or something today, Bells?" She chuckled bitterly.

"Yeah, or something." I gave her an encouraging smile and jumped in.

"Tell you what, Chief, you'd have been proud of your daughter today if you'd seen her in action. I only caught the second act, and that was impressive enough, but I'm guessing the first act was a real show stopper." I said, and we all turned to Bella to see what she would say. She blushed bright red and struggled to begin.

"Yeah ... Ummm... See at work today..." She stared down at her fingers which were picking at each other, as she related the story of what had happened with Mrs Newton at work, and whilst I'd gathered the gist of it from what Bella had revealed earlier at the store, I grew madder and madder as she told us word for word what Dianne Newton had said, and more and more impressed as she repeated her own parts of the fight.

"And that's why I was driving around town aimlessly when I found those bikes." She finished off, still with her eyes firmly on her hands, and I wondered absently, _"Bikes? What bikes?"_ We all sat in silence, Jared and I looking at the Chief to see his reaction, and his eyes still on Bella.

"So if that was the first act, what was the second?" He asked me, and I looked at Bella to make sure she was ok with me telling the next part of the story. She nodded at me, and I began telling the the Chief (and pretending to tell Jared) about how amazing she'd been in the supermarket, leaving out the hilarious condom incident, at which she looked very relieved. She reddened again, and I smirked a little to myself, realising she must be remembering her embarrassment at the time. I didn't relate what I'd heard the gossips telling each other; not wanting to cause unnecessary upset, but I _did_ repeat everything that had been said at the checkout. Silence reigned once again after I'd finished my part and she, Jared and I looked at the Chief again for his reaction, while he stared at Bella. His moustache began to twitch.

"And on the phone a few minutes ago?" He asked. She filled him in on the call, minus the 'tramp' comment, obviously wanting to protect him from realising just how unpleasant some of the women were being to her. The Chief's moustache twitched even more. Suddenly he could hold it in no longer and great roars of laughter filled the air. After a few seconds, Jared and I couldn't help but join in, even Bella giggled along a bit.

"Oh Bells, hon, I'm so proud of you. You really gave all those nosy bitches what they had coming, but never once crossed the line. You even managed to stop Mrs Green in her tracks, get her back on the right track, and managed to make sure there were no hard feelings. Truly a masterful piece of work." He stood up from the table and went round to her side, giving her a weird hug combined with a noogie, obviously he wasn't too comfortable with public emotional displays, but she seemed to appreciate the gesture.

The Chief's cell phone rang just then and he went into the living room to answer it. Jared and I could hear the person on the other end of the line telling him about yet another missing hiker, and we looked at each other covertly, and I jumped up to clear our plates. We had to leave to investigate, but couldn't look suspicious.

"Thanks for dinner, Bella, it was amazing." I said, and Jared caught on quickly.

"Yeah it really was. Best lasagne I've ever had. I'll definitely be coming back here again." Jared joked, sitting back and rubbing his stomach appreciatively. We both fell silent for a moment, hearing Paul's howl from the forest. _"Fuck. Vampire again. Probably the red head. Fuck!"_ Bella looked like even she could feel our tension a little.

"I'm really sorry to eat and run, Bella, but I've just realised the time, and Jared and I need to get back to the Rez. We promised we'd give another quote for a house over there this evening. Thanks again, it really was an awesome dinner." I flashed her a large grin, trying to disguise the stress, and she waved me off.

"It was no trouble, really. I'd already cooked it all, you two just helped us eat it. And you helped that whole gossip telling thing go better too, so I owe you some thanks I think." She smiled at us both as she walked us to the door, and I took a few extra, precious seconds to lean down, take in a last lungful of her amazing scent, and whisper in her ear,

"That's two you owe me then." And smirking to myself, I hurried into the truck, with Jared right behind me and we drove off, only to pull up round the corner, out of sight, jump out, run into the forest and phase.

As soon as I phased, I was aware of Paul's barely controlled rage, as he valiantly tried to keep the red headed leech away from a terrified hiker who was in a tight ball on a lower limb of a tree, whilst also trying to keep out of sight of the same hiker. The red head was laughing, lips still red with stolen blood, obviously from the dead body lying broken and forgotten behind her. A pair of missing hikers then, not just one. She seemed to playing with Paul; lunging forward, the dancing back out of range of his teeth as she taunted him about how delicious the other hiker had been.

_"You're doing great, Paul." _I commended him._ "Just keep it up for another few minutes. We're coming up behind her. Hopefully we'll be able to trap her between us this time, and put an end to her pointless sick game."_ I put on another spurt of speed, trying to run as silently as possible so as not to alert her that she had more company.

_"Trying, Boss." _Paul replied, his mental voice strained as he pushed himself off from the ground to leap in front of another forward lunge from the red head._ "It's weird; she wants to get past me, but I get the feeling she's not really after his dude in the tree. It's like she wants to get by me for another reason. Though fuck if I can guess what it is she's really after."_ I looked at his memory of the fight so far. He was right. She didn't seem to give. Shit about whether she got to murder the other hiker or not. But she definitely wanted past Paul.

Jared and I slowed, and sneaked the last few hundred yards on our bellies, getting as close as we could without alerting her to our presence.

_"On three, Jared and I will jump her." _I ordered tensely. _"Paul, you be ready to do the same from your side, and we'll pin the bitch between us. One," _Jared and I raised ourselves a little, tensing for the attack._ "Two," _we crouched on our haunches, ready to leap._ "Three! Oh fuck!"_ As we all pounced, her head shot up, as if she somehow knew we had her, and she made her own leap; straight up, and grabbing a branch, she swung herself over the top of us and landed a few yards behind where Jared and I had paused, waiting for our moment. Jared, Paul and I all collided painfully, and landed in a tangled web of furry limbs, and she laughed, and raced off, calling over her shoulder.

"Bye for now, doggies. I'll be back for what's owed me. You can't keep me away from it forever."

_"That BITCH!"_ Paul was nearly frothing at the mouth in fury, as we all scrambled to our feet to give chase. Tearing through the forest, following her over-sweet, bleachy scent, I asked the others _"Any ideas about what the fuck she thinks is owed her?" _

_"Not a clue" _came Jared's reply, right on top of Paul's_ "No fucking idea, Boss" _and I growled a little in frustration._ "I get the feeling she's gonna keep in coming back til she gets what she wants." _I said._ "Or until we kill her." _They both snarled their agreement to that last part and we ran on. Suddenly, we all came to a screeching halt. The trail had ended. Just like that; a sudden dead end, with no clues as to where she had gone.

_"Shit!" _Jared growled, looking upwards into the branches above._ "She's gone up into the trees. We won't be able to follow her scent, and for all we know, she could be doubling back, trying another tactic to get past us." _Paul and I both knew he was right, and, no signal necessary, all three of us turned tail and headed back to Forks and he rez to keep her away from whatever it was she was after in one go hose two places.

_"Ok." _I said_ "Paul, you run a loop round the Rez, Jared do the same round Forks. We need to check if she's come back this way. I'll head back to the hiker, and make sure he's safe. Paul, once you've run your loop, if its all clear, you grab some shorts for Jared and me, and meet us by my truck._" They both nodded once in agreement as we ran, and after another five miles, we began to veer away from each other, all set on our particular tasks.

I ran on until I had once again found the hiker in the forest. There was no sign of the leech being back to get a second course, but I was reluctant to abandon him all alone with his friend's body, so I lurked in amongst the trees until I could hear part of the search party breaking through the undergrowth not far away. The hiker seemed o be in shock; sitting stock still in stony silence, and I was a little concerned that the search party might pass right by him, so I decided to try to jolt him out of his shock. I figured that if I let loose a bit of a growl, and allowed him to catch I fleeting glimpse of me through the trees, his mind would make the logical leap and think I was a very big bear. If I was really lucky, he would make he further assumption that that same bear had killed his friend, and reports of a rogue bear might serve to keep people out of the woods for a while, cutting down on the red heads buffet bonanza. I examined my plan carefully, and, seeing no holes in it, I set it in action. Growling lowly, I made as much noise as possible, breaking branches as I passed, and starting any small animals in my path as I moved through the trees, careful to only allow him a few, slightly obscured glances at me. It seemed to work; the next time one of the search party called out his and his friend's names, he screamed back

"Here! Over here. Come quick. A huge bear attacked my friend and its still here somewhere." Snorting internally at the stupidity of the man for yelling so close to a supposedly mad bear, drawing attention to himself, I silently crept back into deeper cover, and, once I saw the first member of the search party reach the hiker, I ghosted off deeper into the forest to loop back around towards the truck.

Jared was already there, having completed his run around Forks, and just as I arrived, so did Paul.

_"Anything?"_ I asked them both, already knowing the answer, but too wired to just stand there in silence.

_"All clear. No new scents."_ Jared reported, and phased back, collecting a pair of shorts from where Paul had dropped them on the ground.

_"No sign of the bitch at the Rez either." _Paul confirmed _"Whatever it is she's after, it looks like she's given up for tonight."_

_"Ok, good job, Paul. You did really well to hold her off til we could get there." _I complimented him._ "I'll take patrol now. You and Jared head on back home and get some sleep. We're going to have to keep our guard up from now on. She was far too close to town for my liking tonight. We'll have to run wider sweeps and try to cut her off before she gets so close next time."_ Once Paul had phased back, I let him tie my shorts to my hind leg for me, then waited til he and Jared had gotten back into the truck and driven off before I melted back into the forest and began a loop of my own around Forks.

My route took me right past the Swan house, and I could hear Bella inside, mumbling something about explaining something to the Chief, without lying to him. Wondering what that was about, and figuring she must be on the phone - either that or she was having a conversation with herself - I flopped down in the undergrowth just inside the edge of the forest behind the house, and waited to see if she'd explain more. A light came on in a window next to the tree in the back of the house, almost directly in front of where I lay, and then quickly went off again and I heard her breaths evening out into a sleep pattern almost immediately. _"She must've been exhausted to fall asleep so fast"_ I thought, then it occurred to me that until the Chief returned, she was completely alone in the house. I decided to hang on where I was til the Chief got back, now that the hikers had been found I figured it wouldn't bee too long before he was home.

Bella had been asleep for around half an hour when the screaming started. Just before it began, she'd been mumbling in her sleep. Begging someone, I didn't have to think too hard to guess who, to come back, not to leave her. My heart bled for her as I heard the misery and loneliness in her voice, but then she began a blood curdling scream which put all my fur on end, and I shot to my feet, looking around for a sign to show me what was attacking her. The screams cut off suddenly, and all I could hear was her crying, her sobs almost more terrible to hear than her screams had been. I realised she had been screaming in her sleep. _"Is this why she looks so exhausted all the time?"_ I wondered. I had to admit, if my sleep was interrupted like that, I wouldn't do much sleeping either. She seemed to regain control of herself quite quickly, and I listened as she schooled her breathing back to a steady, rhythmic pace. I knew she had fallen back asleep, when I heard her mumbling start up again. This time it was something about a woman named Victoria, and blood, and a knife. The poor girl was positively riddled with nightmares. At some point though, her dream must've shifted, as her mumbles shifted into moans and sighs, grunts and groans. From the sounds of it, whatever she was dreaming now, it was _good_. I felt a familiar heat curling in the pit of my stomach as the thought of Bella moaning and sighing for _me_ popped into my head, and I grew uncomfortable listening to her having such an intimate dream. I felt like a voyeur, and I was honestly relieved when my sensitive ears caught the sound of the Chief's cruiser approaching the house. I loped back into the forest and ran another loop around Forks, then a few loops around La Push, before calling it a day and returning home to get some sleep of my own. And if I dreamed about having a certain brunette writhing and moaning underneath me... Well that was my own business.

I slept like the dead until a little after noon, knowing that Jared had early patrol and would call if anything was wrong, and when I finally woke up I felt completely refreshed and full of energy, if more than a little hungry. After a quick shower, and a big breakfast, even by my standards, I headed down to my moms house. She worked on Sunday afternoons, and I tried, whenever possible, to do a few chores around her place while she was out. She might not be talking to me, but I loved her fiercely still, and if I could do any little thing to make her life easier, I would always try to do it. I chopped some wood for her, and stacked it under the back porch, and then I made a start on fixing a few loose shingles I'd spotted on her roof. It took me a few hours to get the whole roof repaired, and I jumped down and ran the hose over my head and upper body to get the worst of the sweat and grime off. I had to meet up with Billy Black to discuss the latest leech attack, and I didn't want to walk into his house stinking and filthy. Deciding to walk along the beach to his place, rather than go straight through town, I headed down the beach path, and not long after I'd passed the driftwood trees that piled themselves up in the same spot every year, I caught, once again, that glorious scent. _"Bella? What's she doing down here again?" _There was the faint smell of the Chief overlaying her own scent, and I wondered if she'd come out for a walk with him once more, or if she was wearing one of his shirts again. Looking ahead, I couldn't see any sign of her, or anyone else for that matter, and the gusting wind made it almost impossible to narrow down exactly where her scent was coming from. I continued to wander along the beach, allowing the waves to wash over my feet every so often as the frigid water had no effect on me with my higher body temperature. Her scent grew stronger as the wind occasionally washed it around me, and I stopped, looking around me to see where she was. Still no-one to be seen. Puzzled, I remained completely still for a few minutes, listening hard to try to catch anything above the crashing waves and blustering wind. There it was. Slow, almost impossibly slow, measure breathing, and an almost worryingly slow, steady heartbeat. I turned my head a little to try to gauge the direction. It seemed to be coming from a fallen tree on the edge of the beach, so I wandered towards it to investigate. Her scent grew stronger. It was definitely her, but I was confused by the alarmingly slow heart rate and breathing. Was she ok? As I got closer to the tree I realised that the way it had fallen had created a sheltered hollow under the root end of the tree, and this appeared to be where the sounds and her scent were coming from. Not wanting to startle her I called out her name in a low voice.

"Bella?" There was no reply. The wind was probably blowing my voice away from her. I tried again a little louder as I stopped right by the wildly blowing roots that covered her sheltered spot.

"Bella. It's Sam. Are you ok?" Still nothing. I was getting worried. Her breathing and heart rate showed no sign that she had heard me at all, even though I was calling in a loud voice straight into her shelter. I held some of the roots to one side to peer into the hollow.

"Bella? Can you hear me? It's Sam." Still nothing. I was right in front of her. With her eyes wide open like that, she must see me, but still there was no response at all. _"Oh fuck. Has she gone back into her zombie state? What happened?" _Her face was shadowed, but I could see her well enough to see that her eyes were open. I nudged her shoulder.

"BELLA? Are you ok?" Still a big fat nothing, and I could feel panic rising._ "Was Paul and that evil biddy in the store right? Was she on something?"_ I couldn't _smell_ any drugs, but the slow heart rate, the low breathing, the spaced out expression, they all certainly hinted at _something_ being in her system. I decided to give it one more try before I just reached in, picked her up, and ran her to the clinic. I shook her shoulder and yelled right in her face.

"BELLA!..." Suddenly her eyes snapped into focus and she was actually looking at me. Her heart rate rose, along with her breathing, and I was almost weak with relief "Oh! Thank fuck for that! Are you ok, Bella? Have you taken something?" the look she gave me was filled with indignation.

"No! Of course not! Shit. Can't a girl have a little nap in a warm cozy spot without being scared half to death?" She snapped at me, and tried to shove me back, out of her face. All she achieved was shoving herself back into the root system behind her, with my strength and size, I didn't budge an inch. I was filled with shame at believing, even for a split second, one of the ugly rumours that had been spread about her. I knew better than to believe anything those nasty bitches had said. Trying to cover my shame, I got a little snarky. I raised an eyebrow.

"You always nap with your eyes wide open and staring?" I asked her.

"I don't know what to tell you, Sam. I was minding my own business, thinking and relaxing, listening to the waves, I fell asleep and was dreaming when someone" She glared hard at me, a kitten thinking it was a lion, not realising she was staring down a wolf, "shoved me and woke me up." I didn't believe thats what had happened. People don't sleep with their eyes wide open like that, but it might've explained the heart and breathing rate. Sleep would slow both. But not that much. I'm sure my confusion, disbelief, and amusement at her fierce attitude made my face a picture. I took a couple of steps back, standing up outside her shelter, and holding back the dangling roots that were dancing in the wind.

"Well I'm very sorry, Miss Swan. I didn't mean to wake you" for some reason, when I was unsure of myself, sarcasm always seemed to be my default position. "it's getting dark, so maybe me waking you from your nap was a good thing. Wouldn't want the Chief worrying about you." She seemed even more annoyed that she couldn't deny I was right, I held back my smile at her irritation.

"Damn him. Can't he at least have the good grace to be _wrong_ when he's being this annoying?" She groused to herself under her breath, and gave me another glare, which only grew more angry when she noticed I was sniggering behind my hand; she couldn't have known that I could hear every word, despite her low volume and the wind and waves trying to swallow her words.

"Fine. I'll just be going then." She grumbled, pulling at one of the roots above her to haul herself to her feet. When the root she used pulled free, dumping her down onto her ass, I couldn't help bursting into laughter. I put a hand out for her to grab.

"Here, I'll help you up." She took my hand, and I hauled her to her feet, enjoying the feeling of her tiny hand in my own giant one.

"Thanks." She muttered, with more irritation than gratitude, and she pulled the hood back over her head, tucking her hair inside it before stepping out into the wind.

"Come on, I'll walk you back to your truck." I offered, and for a second, I thought she would refuse, but for some reason I couldn't explain, she actually accepted my offer.

"I'm parked up by Billy Black's place." She told me, which kind of worked out perfectly, so I gestured with his head, in a 'let's go then' sort of way, and we set out to Billy's. She walked slowly, in silence, her head down, I'm assuming to keep the wind from pulling her hood back. I tried to break her angry silence.

"So why were you holed up under a fallen tree, napping?" I asked her, and while she ignored the sarcasm, I could sense she wasn't too impressed with me being so obnoxious.

"I noticed the spot the other day when I was walking with Charlie, and when I needed peace and a place to think today, it just sprang to mind. Why? Is it a problem me being here?" She looked worried, like I was going to ban her from the Rez, and I quickly spoke to reassure her.

"No, no, it's fine, Bella. I was just wondering, that's all" I held up my hands at her defensive tone. When we reached the truck a moment later and she lifted her face from the ground to say goodbye, The wind instantly tore her hood back and set her hair to whipping about her face. She ran her hands through it and pulled it back behind her head "_Beautiful." _I thought. _"She looks a little more rested, though if what I heard last night was her having a more restful night, i shudder to think how other nights have sounded. The bags under her eyes are nearly gone, her skin looks a little healthier, that wonderful hair, flying wildly in the wind, that bruised cheek and black eye ..."_ My silent stock take of her beauty ground to a shuddering halt at that last part. My hand flew up and, reminding myself to be gentle, my fingers gripped her chin. I gently but firmly turned her head to the right. At the clearer sight of the bruising, I couldn't help the low growl that escaped me.

"What's this? Who hurt you?" I demanded angrily, my whole body tense and shaking, _"Oh shit. I can't phase in front of her, and definitely not this close to her. I'd rip her to shreds. And with my hand already on her face, once I have claws I'd scar her face for life!"_ I forced myself to calm down, and tried to gain control over my shaking pulled back a little. _"Shit. I've scared her now."_ I thought to myself, finally regaining my control

"That'd be my kitchen floor." She shrugged. "I fell last night and smacked my face against it pretty hard." I stared at her face for a moment, obviously searching for the truth of her statement. Satisfied, I gave a small smile.

"Well hell, Bella. Try not to put dents in the floor over there, won't you?" She smiled back.

"Ok. I'll make. Point of trying." She agreed. She unlocked her truck, and went to climb in. "You need a lift anywhere?" She offered, and I shook my head.

"No thanks, I'm just stopping in to talk to Billy for a bit. You take care now. Oh! And thanks again for dinner last night. Jared won't stop going on about how awesome your lasagne is. I swear the guy is probably off somewhere right no writing sonnets to it." She chuckled at the thought.

"Well I look forward to hearing them. Bye Sam." She clambered in to her truck, started the noisy thing, and drove off. I watched her til she rounded the corner, and then trotted up the few steps to Billy's door. To my surprise, it was the Chief, and not Billy or Jacob who opened the door for me.

"Sam." He said cheerfully. "Just the man, and perfect timing." He walked behind me as I passed through the narrow hall into the sitting room, where Billy was already parked in front of the tv.

"Perfect timing?" I asked, looking to Billy to see what the Chief might mean. Billy just shrugged, and turned to the Chief.

"So what's up, Charlie?" Billy asked. "And what's so perfect about Sam's timing?"

" Well" the Chief replied, sitting down comfortably in the couch, and gesturing me to do the same. "I was coming to let you know, Billy, that the surviving hiker from last night reported a rogue bear in the forest, but seeing as its almost certainly _not_ a bear, and rather one of your _wolf protectors_, I'd say that Sam here is the perfect man to discuss it with. Wouldn't you?" He sat back with a smug look on his face and Billy and I froze, neither of us having a clue what to say.


	14. Chapter 13: Warnings and Wonky Bits

**Yes I know; I left things on a bit of a cliffhanger last chapter, but I'm such a terrible person, I have no intention of putting you out of your misery just yet. Instead, I'm flitting right back to Bella POV, and you'll all have to wait to find out how and exactly what Charlie knows (and what Sam and Billy intend to do about it) a while longer. :0p**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 13: Warnings and Wonky Bits

Bella POV

I beat Charlie back home, and taking into account the ever strengthening wind outside, and the chill it was bringing with it, I decided to cook up something hearty and warming for dinner to welcome him home. I guessed his paperwork, and tying up loose ends surrounding the poor dead hiker and the rogue bear had kept him longer than he'd expected.

I flew around the kitchen, peeling and chopping, and throwing a huge chicken into the oven to roast, and once I'd got everything either already cooking, or prepped and ready to cook, I sat myself down at the kitchen table to finish up the last of my homework. My return to school the next day was already going to prove... interesting, bearing in mind the whirlwind of gossip that was bound to follow me there, not only from the vicious efforts of Mrs Newton, but also from the simple fact that I wasn't going to be the zombie they'd all become used to over the last few months. I didn't need to add extra trouble for myself by being behind in my school work. Nearly an hour of notes on the prohibition era later, dinner was pretty much ready, and Charlie still wasn't back. I cleared my books back into my school bag, laid the table so that when he did get back, we could sit and eat straight away, and I set about collecting up dirty laundry to run a load or two through the machine; with me wearing stuff from Charlie's closet, he'd soon run out of shirts unless I kept on top of things. I'd just finished closing the machine on the first load when I heard Charlie coming in the front door, and I called out

"Hi, Dad. Dinner's pretty much ready, so if you go wash up, we can sit down straight away."

"Ok, Bells. Back down in a minute then." He called back, and I heard him heading up the stairs as I walked back into the kitchen to bring our food to the table.

Charlie was pretty quiet over dinner, he looked a little shaken up, and I guessed that dealing with the coroner and the dead hiker's family okay had upset him more than he'd like to admit, so I decided to turn the conversation towards something completely different to take his mind off his upsetting day.

"So, Dad. You got any ideas about who I should ask for help with my motorcycles?" I asked him

"We'll it's funny you should ask, but actually yes." He replied, reaching across the table to help himself to more mashed potato. "You know Jacob Black is a pretty good mechanic. He's the one that got your truck up and running, as you know. So maybe you could ask him to have a look. It might also be a good idea for you to hang out with him while he works sometimes. If you're going to ride one, you should understand at least the basics of how it runs and how to make simple repairs." Be began spooning out extra mash onto his plate.

"You been conspiring with Billy to get me over there more often?" I asked jokingly, and he dropped the mashed potato bowl on the floor.

"What? No! What do you mean? Why would we do that?" He asked alarmed. _"Woah, calm down, Charlie. I'm not so fragile that I'll fold in on myself again just cos I think you're interfering."_ I jumped up to grab a cloth and clean the sticky mess from the floor.

"Relax, Dad. I'm not mad. But you and Billy trying to set me and Jacob up is a no go, just so we're clear. I'm not ready to even think about dating, I'm not sure I'll _ever_ be ready. But I _am_ sure that if I ever get to that point, it wouldn't be with Jake. I just don't think about him like that. In my head he's quite firmly in the brother/best friend box. Anything else would just be weird." Charlie relaxed a little as I finished mopping up and sat back down.

"Oh well. Can't blame us for trying though." He quickly said, his voice sounding a little too cheerful, strained even. I guessed he'd been really worried I'd react badly to his interfering, so I let him off the hook.

"No I can't blame you. Just as long as you let it go now. Oh, and tell Billy to do the same." He nodded his agreement.

"But all that aside, Bells, Jake is probably your best bet on the motorcycles, and however sneaky I was trying to be, learning a bit about how to do simple repairs is still a good idea." I hadn't noticed how tense he still was til I saw how far his shoulders fell in relief when I agreed.

"Sure, Dad. It's a good point. I'll ask Jake tomorrow after school."

The feeling of peace and calm I'd gained during my strange sort of doze at the beach was still holding when I climbed into bed that night, and I was cautiously hopeful that I might get at least some respite from my nightmares as a result. So I was disappointed when I woke up screaming as usual, with Charlie sitting beside me, shushing me and rubbing my back to help me regain my calm. It had been the standard 'Alone In The Forest' dream as usual, but once again with that added feeling of someone or something watching me as I ran, stumbled, and crawled through the trees. Once Charlie had helped me to calm back down, he headed back to bed and I settled back down to get myself back off to sleep, ready to confront my next set of dreams and following them, get a decent bit of rest.

At first, I thought there was no difference at all in the first scene; the 'Victoria Attacks the Village' scene appeared just the same as it had all the previous times. I was weaving a basket, and watching a small group of children play this time, before the screams in the background alerted me to the fact that the vampire had arrived. Then I noticed that instead of there being just one old man standing not far behind me, there were two. They were completely identical, but whereas one was standing alert, looking to the source of the screams, the other was standing and staring right at me/not me.

"Taha Aki" I greater him, knowing now exactly who he was, although I couldn't say why there were suddenly two of him.

"Watch" he said to me, and I obediently turned to watch the other Taha Aki shake and explode into wolf form, then throw himself into battle with Victoria.

"I understand this part." I told him. "The Quileutes had a clan of shapeshifter wolves, you being the first, who protected the tribe from the cold ones." He nodded gravely and gestured for me to continue watching the fight in front of me.

"Watch" he repeated, and again I turned to witness the struggle. As had happened before, Victoria was gaining the advantage, and not me stepped forward, knife in hand. Somehow though, this time I was separate from not me, and I was able to stand by and watch as the knife was plunged deep into not me's chest. I watched Victoria become distracted and lunge at not me, and then I watched as the wolf Taha Aki took advantage of her distraction and ripped the head from her shoulders. I turned again to the Taha Aki next to me.

"Yes I know all of this. I know I'll have to sacrifice myself to save my father. Why do I have to see it again?" I asked in frustration.

"Watch" was the only response I got, and the dream scene reset itself.

This time I was cooking over a fire when the screams started, and when one Taha Aki became the wolf it was me who stepped forward with the knife, and not me who stood back and watched.

"Watch" Taha Aki told me again, and I saw me drag the knife over my chest instead of plunging it straight in, and this time the wolf was able to rip Victoria apart before she reached me.

"See?" Taha Aki asked me. "Then, and now. The same, but different. Death and life." I didn't really understand him, but I didn't want another replay so I nodded.

Instantly, the scene changed and I was again watching myself in the throes of passion with the huge man.

"Watch" came from beside me, and I looked to see Taha Aki standing there watching along with me.

"I am. But I really wish you wouldn't. It's kind of private, what a girl's 'O' face looks like" I grumbled at him, mortified that someone else, even a dream someone, was seeing me, even a dream me, in such an intimate situation. The old man gave a small amused smile and thankfully kept his attention on the me watching, instead of the me being thrust into by the gorgeous, sweaty, muscular man.

"Life, love, passion, _mates_" the old man stated, gesturing somehow at both the entwined couple and the huge black wolf watching from the corner. The word _mates_ was spoken just as the man plunged his teeth into the moaning, naked me, and then suddenly I was wide awake, sitting bolt upright in my bed and breathing heavily. _"Ok. That was fucking weird."_ I thought. Never before had I been so alert in one of those dreams. I'd never been both in the dream, and at the same time been just a spectator, watching it all take place. _"Well not before this afternoon at this beach"_ I helpfully reminded myself, and I wondered if maybe this was the key to _finally_ understanding what my subconscious was trying to drum into my conscious mind, and in doing so, making the dreams stop. Maybe I just had to make myself be a dispassionate spectator, therefore able to take in the facts without becoming so emotionally involved in the scene. It was something to consider. Deciding I'd do just that; consider the possibility, but not right now, I settled back down under my covers and evened out my breathing to allow real sleep to take me. I needed to get some proper rest so I would be able to cope with whatever was thrown at me at school in the morning.

I made it to the kitchen before Charlie the next morning, and was already sitting down in front of my scrambled eggs, a portion on a plate sitting in Charlie's spot too, when he wandered into the room, carrying one of his plaid shirts.

"Morning, kid. I wasn't sure, but I thought you might want one of my shirts again today." He said as he offered it to me. I smiled gratefully and took it from him, pulling it on and rolling up the sleeves between bite of my breakfast.

"Thanks, Dad. Did you sleep ok?" I asked. He sat down opposite me, tucking into his own eggs and answered.

"A few weird dreams, but other than that, yeah, thanks" he replied.

"Yeah I can relate." I said, and I took my plate and rinsed it off before picking up my bag. "We'll I guess I'd better get going. Being late wont help with whatever the day has in store for me." I grimaced slightly at the thought of how my day was likely to play out.

"Just you be that strong young woman you've shown me over the last couple of days and everything will be fine, kiddo" Charlie told me with a proud look on his face and I hoped rather than believed he was right. "And _if_ for some reason it gets to be too much, I won't be mad if you feel you have to leave early." He added, and I was flooded with gratitude and affection for him. He knew it was going to be a tough day for me, and while he also knew there wasn't much he could do to help me at school, he was trying to give me options if I needed them.

"Thanks, Dad. But I'm sure it'll be fine. Or, well, probably not fine but at least not so bad I won't be able to cope." I gave him a kiss on top of his head as I passed him on my way to the door and he coughed a little uncomfortably.

"Yes, we'l, the option's there if you need it, anyway. Take it easy, Bells. Are you calling Jake after school about the bikes, or going down to La Push to see Him?"

"Not sure to be honest." I replied, one hand on the door, "I guess I'll see how the day goes, and how I feel at the time. Bye Dad. Have a good day."

"You too, kid" I heard as I closed the door behind me, and I jumped into my truck and headed off to face whatever the day held.

Driving my truck into the school parking lot erased any hopes I might have been foolish enough to allow myself, as every single head turned to watch me pull in and park. Everyone, from the least popular freshman, to the most popular senior, who was, for some unexplained reason Lauren Mallory, was standing around in small groups, casting the occasional glance my way every so often. Everyone except Angela Weber and Ben Cheney, who were walking over to me with friendly smiles on their faces.

"Hi Bella. Glad to see you back, how are you feeling?" Angela asked as she got to me, giving me a big hug "Don't worry, Ben and I have your back. You're not alone. Smile and don't let them see they're bothering you" she whispered to me before she pulled back.

I smiled a little, relieved. However bad things got today, I ha at least two good friends who wouldn't let me face it all alone. "I'm feeling a lot better, thanks " I said squeezing her hand and catching Ben's eye to give him a grateful smile too.

"Well you're certainly looking better than you did on Thursday, no offense." Ben said to me as we all turned and headed for the main entrance, ignoring completely the whispering kids still standing around in the parking lot. I laughed a little.

"Yeah. And smelling a bit better too, I bet." I joked. I wanted to make it clear they didn't need to walk on eggshells around me.

"I wasn't going to mention that, but yeah. Definitely." Angela teased and I jabbed her lightly in the ribs with my elbow. After opening the door for us, Ben took up a station on my right, as Angela linked her arm with mine on the left. "I know you're not much into the touchy freely thing" she explained as we walked to home room, "but a united front looks so much better to anyone who might be watching." I offered up silent thanks to anyone who might be listening for giving me such good friends and we all sat down together in the the back of the room, with Angela and Ben still flanking me.

"Ang and I have compared our class schedules and between us you've got friendly company in all your classes all week except for gym and math." Ben confided to me in a quiet tone as the other kids began to file in to the room. "I don't think your math class will be too much trouble, as the only one in there you'll really have to worry about is Jessica and she wasn't exactly in the front of the line when they were handing out brains. But gym might be a problem. You've got both Lauren and Mike in that class with you, as you know, and they're both pretty determined to make your life difficult."

"Well bearing in mind that I thought I'd be in for hell in pretty much every class, dealing with them in just gym class should be a breeze." I said, trying to sound nonchalant. Judging by the worried expressions on my friends' faces, I failed.

"Bella, you're going to have to watch yourself with those two. Lauren's always had a problem with you and she's grabbing the opportunity to kick you when you're down with both hands, and I don't know what really went down between you and Mrs Newton, but whatever it was, Mike's sticking to his mom's version of the incident, and telling anyone who'll listen all about the numerous times you've tried to get into his pants." Angela warned me seriously. I quickly gave her and Ben a condensed version of the fight at Newtons and Ben and Angela both looked disgusted.

"That woman has always been a money grabbing parasite." Ben spat under his breath, "and she's always been the first to spout any far fetched gossip when given the chance. But this really does take the cake." He looked absolutely livid. "I'm sorry to be the one to tell you, Bella, but there's also a lot of rumours going around about you sleeping around in Phoenix, and moving here due to a pregnancy scare. As well as a lot of stories about you being a drug addict." He looked sympathetic. "Ang and I don't believe a word of it, in case you wondered, but even if it was all true, you've never been anything but nice to both of us, and we're not ones to judge people by their pasts, only by how they treat us." My eyes welled up a little at his heartfelt kind words, and I reached out to squeezed each of their hands.

"You're good friends, both of you. Thank you." I said "There's no truth to any of it, by the way. Charlie would've caught me out the first time I got high and put a stop to that, and as for the pregnancy thing... I'm still a virgin, for fuck's sake. I'm pretty sure that makes any of the rest if it impossible." I gave. Bitter little laugh. "Mind you, short of a publicly screened pelvic exam, I'm pretty sure none of them are going to believe that for a second. Ben gave a snort of cynical laughter, which drew the teacher's attention, and we fell quiet for the rest if the class.

When the bell went, I headed off alone to my math class, refusing Ben's kind offer of walking me there as I didn't want him to be in trouble for being late to his own class. As I walked through the hallways I moved in a weird bubble of silence. The kids in front of me would whisper and giggle, shooting glances at me and then grow silent and staring as I passed. Then, once I'd gotten by them, they'd start up their gossiping again. I was grateful to arrive at my math class for the first time in my life. My heart sank though as I entered the classroom to discover the only free seat was next to Jessica. Steeling myself, I lifted my chin and strode over to the empty seat, sitting down and offering Jessica a pleasant smile.

"Morning, Jess. Had a good weekend?" I asked her, earning a wide open mouth and blank stare as she tried to work out what to say.

"Erm yeah. It was ok, thanks. How about you? Anything _interesting_ happen?" She asked, clearly fishing for more gossip to add to her already oversized haul.

"Nothing much really." I lied, opening up my books. "Just hung with my dad and his friends on the Rez, did some cooking and housework, and caught up on my sleep. I'd been having real problems with insomnia for quite a while, and it finally seems to be letting up on me. Just as well; from what Charlie tells me, I've been something of a zombie for the last few months from lack of sleep." I managed to keep the blush from my face as I spoke, trying to imagine the conversation as a hand of poker; I was bluffing to try to get the chance to work out what was in her hand. _"And if she doesn't believe me, or pass that on as a reason for my recent behaviour, I wasn't speaking quietly, so one of the nosy asses siting around us here might pass it on themselves."_ I thought, silently congratulating myself on my clever manoeuvre.

"So is that why you've been sleeping around so much?" She asked, seeming to genuinely believe what she was asking. "Trying to exhaust yourself into sleeping properly?" I almost felt sorry for her. _Almost_. She was actually so stupid that she completely believed the bunch of lies she'd been spoon fed. Funnily enough, I felt no malice coming from her at all. She didn't seem to my old my supposed behaviour against me, she was just desperate to know, to be the first with the information. I began to wonder if this wasn't the real reason behind Jessica's hunger for gossip. Unlike most of the others, she wasn't doing it to be hurtful, or out of malicious glee, she was just clever enough to know that she was as thick as the grease on a McDonalds burger, and was desperate to be the first to know any gossip so that she could use her information to disguise her stupidity.

"No, Jess." I answered with more gentleness than I would've had before my epiphany. "I haven't been sleeping with anyone." I decided to sacrifice my own pride a little to get my point across. "You saw what I've looked like the last few months; the bags under my eyes, the greasy hair, the weight loss, the smell." We both winced at the memory. "You really think anyone would want to sleep with that?" I asked her and she looked thoughtful.

"But then why would Mike's mom say all that stuff?" She wondered.

"Because I caught her out being a bitch and quit my job, so she needed to cover her ass. Making up some shit about me was an effective way of doing that." I explained just as the teacher started up the lesson, and I let her spend the rest of the hour running it through her mind.

Angela was waiting for me outside the classroom to walk with me to our English class, so I was saved the lonely walk through the hallways a second time.

"How did it go with Jessica?" She asked as we walked, ignoring the whispering that surrounded us.

"Not as bad as I'd expected." I answered, and I filled her in on what was said, and my theory behind Jessica's gossip habit.

"You might actually be right on that one." Angela mused. "But I'm afraid the same can't be said for pretty much everyone else. It's all about malice and enjoying other people's misfortune with most of them."

"Yeah I know." I sighed. "It's just nice to know there's at least one person who's not being mean deliberately." I added, and we sat down and pulled our books out. We continued talking quietly, me telling Angela about my motorcycles and my plan to get Jacob to help me with them, until the teacher arrived to start the class. I never thought I'd be grateful for Mr Berty's dry old fashioned teaching style, but right now I was glad he wasn't one for opening up class discussions. The less time my class mates had to snipe at me, the better my day was likely to go. I pretended to follow along the reading of Moby Dick like everyone else, but instead I was thinking over that first dream scene from the night before. I was right. Being somewhat distanced from the events as I had been helped me make more sense out of it. I decided that Taha Aki had kept repeating "watch" in that slightly annoying way to reinforce the idea of observing and being separate from it all. The scene repeating itself, and the old man's talking of "then and now" made me think that the first scene, the one where not me had stabbed herself, was me re-hashing one of the legends I must've read in that book, whereas the second scene where I had just cut myself to distract Victoria was me telling myself that I didn't necessarily have to die to get her attention away from my father. That _right_ feeling washed over me with each realisation, but I couldn't see how distracting Victoria but not letting her kill me would keep Charlie safe. Sure it'd be great if I didn't have to break his heart that way, and I'd prefer to take that route of course. If I could. _"Which would be just fine if I only had someone there who was able to fight her off. Which I don't." _I thought in frustration. I had the feeling I was missing something important, but I couldn't for he life of me see what.

Angela nudged me to get my attention when I didn't move along with everyone else when the class ended. I scrambled to my feet, apologising to her for zoning out, and a voice from behind me said

"What's the rush, Bella? Got some drugs to take between classes?" I turned around to see who had spoken. Great. One of Lauren's cronies. Everyone else stopped in their tracks to see how I would respond.

"Why? You Jonesing for a fix?" I asked, one eyebrow raised, and turned to link my arm with Angela's then walked out, head high, accompanied by the shocked laughter of my classmates.

"That was brilliant" Angela whispered to me as we headed to Spanish class. "Just keep that up, and they'll be either too impressed with your comebacks, or too scared of them to carry on bitching at you."

"I'll do my best, Ang." I said as we walked in to our next class.

Spanish was uneventful, luckily, and it being a double lesson, it took us right up to lunch. _"Now for the big challenge."_ I thought to myself._ "There's no way lunch will go without at least one person causing trouble."_

Ben joined us in the lunch queue, and after giving Angela a quick kiss hello, he turned to me and said. "All anyone could talk about in my business class was how you verbally bitch slapped one of Lauren's little clones when she started on you. Nicely done, Bella." I grinned at him, grabbing a sandwich and an apple for myself.

"Well thanks. I don't know why it is, but the last couple of days, exactly the right words come to me when I need them, instead of me getting flustered and tearful like I used to. I can't honestly say I don't like it." They both grinned back, and we sat down at a free table together. I was only a few bites into my sandwich, when Lauren stalked over to our table and stood glaring at me. The lunch hall fell quiet as everyone prepared themselves for an entertaining show.

Decided to give up on the anorexia then Bella? Or are you just planning to go the bulimia route instead?" She asked snidely, and loudly, gesturing to my lunch.

"No, I'll leave the self induced vomiting to you, Lauren." I answered. "Actually, I see your fingers look a little sore from catching them on your teeth when you shove them down your throat, I said, pointing at the first two fingers on her right hand that bore tell tale signs of her doing just that. "I've got some ointment in my bag that might help, if you want?" I offered sweetly, giving her a false smile. Her face paled, then reddened, an ugly scowl crossing her brow.

"Whatever, Whore. Just because you worked your way through all the guys at this school, and all the men on the Rez, don't try coming on to me like that, you std riddled dike. Even if I had any interest in girls, I wouldn't have anything to do with you." She looked triumphant as a number of her friends giggled and gave each other lame high fives at her bitchy comment. My smile just grew wider.

"'Whore' indicates that I take money, goods or services for sleeping with people, Lauren. Not my style at all, though I know a few people that might do that." I gave her a sudden innocently interested expression. "Hey, Lauren, who paid for your boob job?" She gasped and clutched her hands protectively to her breasts as a few laughs started around the room. "Whoever it was must've paid bargain basket prices. I've never seen such a wonky job." The laughter increased, Ben and Angela joining in openly. "You must not be very good in bed, if all you got paid for it was a Wallmart brand boob job." Even a few of Lauren's clones giggled a little at that, before she turned and silenced them with a glare.

"Jealous that I've got something decent on top, while you've barely got a handful, Swan?" Lauren sneered, eyeing my admittedly kind of flat chest.

"Not at all. It's clear to anyone that mine are all natural, whereas even if the wonky job your McSurgeon did wasn't screaming 'bad boob job' to anyone with eyes in their head, the first time you get on a plane, they're bound to explode with the cabin pressure at high altitudes." Ben let out a massive snort of laughter at this, joined by most of the guys in the hall.

"Ha! That's where you're wrong." Lauren crowed "They didn't explode when I flew to Aspen over Christmas." The roars of laughter from all around the hall at her unintentional admission of having fake tits alerted her to what she had just said. She looked absolutely livid. "You nasty, disease ridden, dike whore." She spat with venom. "Don't try to deflect attention from yourself. You walk around here like you're better than everyone else. Just cos you were able to sucker one of the Cullens into spending his time, and money on you. Well you're not. Everyone knows about you now. Everyone knows how you've sold yourself to everyone that could pay, and given yourself away for free to most of the Rez when they couldn't pay." I hid the flinch of pain I felt in my chest from her insinuations about Him as she looked around triumphantly.

"Make up your mind, Lauren. Am I a dike, or am I sleeping with anyone with a dick?" I hurried on before she could do more than open her mouth to answer. "If I'm a whore, perhaps we could ask anyone in the room who's used my services, the services of a 'disease ridden whore', to raise their hands?" Everyone looked around the hall, baring myself, Angela and Ben, who all stared stonily at Lauren. "No? No takers? Guess I'm innocent of that charge then. Maybe it's cos I'm such a big lesbian. Maybe the numerous girls I've slept with would raise their hands?" Again everyone except myself and my friends looked about for raised hands. "No joy there either. Guess I can't be a 'dike' either. Now there's no-one here from the Rez, so I guess I can't prove that one's not true either, but Lauren, _why is it only the guys from the Rez who wouldn't be able to pay_? Isn't that more than a tiny bit racist?" I noticed several kids in the hall begin to realise the same thing, and more than one look of disgust was now being sent Lauren's way. "Calling me 'dike' rather than just saying 'gay' or 'lesbian' was a pretty big giveaway too. Who knew you were such a bigot?" I gave her a stern, disapproving look. "So I think I'm better than everyone cos I was dating E..Edward?" I forced myself to say his name, barely hesitating over it, and clenched my fists around the pain.

I took a steadying breath and continued. "What's really got you mad, Lauren? That I dated him? Or that he _wouldn't date you_?" Angela laughed outright at this point, and I turned and smiled at her. Turning back to Lauren, I let the smile drop and my face became set. Angry and determined.

"Here's how it's going to be, Lauren. And I suggest you listen closely, because this is your only warning. You will not spread any more lies about me, or my dad, or about anyone I care about. If I hear of one rumour that can be traced back to you, if I find out that you've been passing notes in class about me, if you write anything about me online, I will not only sue you for slander and libel, I will also press criminal charges for defamation of character. Lucky for me that's a criminal offense here in Washington. _Especially_ if the lies spread are in regards to diseases, such as sexually transmitted diseases, or relate to a woman's chastity. Old fashioned, I know, but the law's the law. And with my dad being the Chief of police, you think I'd find it too hard to make the charges stick? No. Neither do I." Her face grew paler and paler with each word. "Now" I said, shooing her away with my hands like a troublesome fly, "you and your lopsided sweater bumps get out of my face. My friends and I are trying to eat our lunch." Turning my back on her, I sat down and picked up my sandwich, completely ignoring Lauren's indignant spluttering and the laughter and scattered applause coming from around the lunch hall. I focused only on my sandwich for several more minutes, still fighting against the pain and panicked breathing that was threatening to overtake me after saying His name out loud. Angela touched my arm gently, and I glanced up to see her looking at me in concern.

"Bella. We've sat here for long enough to prove your 'unconcern'" she whispered. "Do you want to go outside for a bit to calm yourself down?" I looked around, noticing that everyone had gone back to chatting amongst themselves.

"If you guys don't mind, then yeah. Please." I answered, and straight away they both stood along with me, and seemingly casually linked with an arm each. Then, with my friends steadying me to disguise my wobbly knees, and carefully held back panicked breathing, we made our way out o the side door of the dining hall, and around the corner where I instantly dropped to the ground, gasping for breath with absent lungs.

It took me the rest of the lunch hour to pull myself back together, Ben and Angela quietly coaching me to get my breathing back under control. I resisted their attempts to get me to go home for the rest of the day though. I refused to let the likes of Lauren or Mike chase me out of school. When the bell rang, I was sufficiently recovered that I hauled myself to my feet, and allowed Angela to walk with me to biology class. She sat beside me, rather than in her usual spot, because her lab partner was off sick. A fact I was very grateful for since Mike sat behind me in this class with Tyler. As I sat down I heard him whisper to his friend

"Here comes the molester. Keep your hands over your junk if you want to keep it safe." I sighed heavily, he last thing I wanted after my showdown with Lauren was more confrontation, but I wasn't about to let him continue spreading his and his mother's malicious shit. I turned in my seat.

"Mike. You and I both know that your mother's story is a pack of vicious lies with more holes than a shower head. I'm sure that you know what I told Lauren at lunch?" He nodded warily, so I continued. "Well the same goes for you. In fact I'll add to it. Lauren has never liked me, and never made a secret of it, so I can understand a certain amount of animosity from her. But you? You pretended to be a friend. We talked together at school, and worked together for nearly a year. You tried to get me to agree to date you more times than I can count. But now, because you're a weak, spineless little twerp who does whatever mommy says, you're setting out to ruin me and through me, my dad, just because I had the nerve to tell your mommy a few home truths? Pathetic. You do not talk to me. You do not breathe near me. If we are forced to sit near each other in class, you will pretend I don't exist, and I will do the same with you. Other than that, you get the same warning Lauren did. And I suggest you pass it on to your mommy. Don't think for a second that just because she's an adult, I won't have the nerve to press the same charges against her. That would be a bad mistake for you both. And that's the last thing you'll ever hear me say to you." I turned back round, and began chatting cheerfully with Angela as if I'd never seen or even heard of Mike, Spineless Wonder, Newton.


	15. Chapter 14: Meditation and Motorcycles

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit**.

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Chapter 14: Meditation and Motorcycles

Whilst Angela had computer science, the last class of the day for Ben and I was history, and as I had completed my homework the night before, and the teacher was just re-capping what I'd already covered in the assignment, I was able to spend my time sitting quietly and pretending to pay completely attention, whist I was, in fact spending the hour trying to quiet my racing brain.

After the showdown with Lauren, and then my little speech to Mike, I had some hope that the gossip situation might come to an early close. At school at least. Indeed, when I walked into the history classroom, several of my classmates made a point of saying a friendly "Hello" to Ben and I. I glanced at him and we both rolled our eyes at the fickle nature of high school kids. Only a few hours before I had been lower than the shit on their shoes, and now all of a sudden, I was worth stopping a conversation to greet. I sat in silence as the class debated the pros and cons of prohibition, holding my own private debate instead. The subject in my mind was whether to take to bikes down to Jacob after school, or just call him to see if he could help. The bikes were still in the back of my truck, covered by a tarp to protect them from the weather, so it would be a simple matter to just drive on over to La Push once school let out, but I was mentally and emotionally exhausted. I needed, no.. I desperately needed to calm my mind and find some balance again. _"Like I did on the beach yesterday." _I reminded myself._ "Why not combine the two? Head down to First Beach, find that peace I found yesterday, then once I'm calm and relaxed, go on to see Jacob about the bikes."_ It seemed like a sensible plan. I no longer had to work on Monday afternoons, and Charlie wouldn't mind getting a pizza in instead of me cooking, I was sure. Decision made, I dragged my attention back to the room just in time to find everyone packing their books back away. Saying goodbye and thank you to Ben and Angela in the parking lot, I climbed into my truck and left a message at the station for Charlie, telling him where I was going, then set off for the beach.

The wind had let up during the night, but the rain was coming down in torrents and I was a little anxious as I approached my little hollow about whether or not it would be dry enough inside to sit comfortably. I needn't have worried. The overhanging roots seemed to do an excellent job of keeping the weather out, and the small drift of sand was as dry as it had been the day before. I flopped down into the soft pile and wriggled my ass into it until I was once again in a comfortable sandy armchair, then closed my eyes and focused on the sound of the waves coming in and out. In and out.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

Quicker than it had happened before, my body loosened and relaxed, and my mind floated away, drifting back and forth with the rhythm of the waves. I let go of the confrontations at school, the stress of trying to figure out my dreams so they would stop, and every other conscious thought and simply let everything flow freely as it pleased.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

A thought lazily drifted in about how to handle Billy and Charlie's trying to set me up with Jacob. I really liked the guy, but not in that way, however I knew he did have a little thing for me. I'd taken advantage of it unfairly when I was looking for information to answer the Cullen puzzle, and now I was going to have to do some damage control. Perhaps just laying things on the line straight away would be the key. Make it clear I could use all the friends I could get right now, but that's all I could use. It seemed like the best way, the fairest way to handle things. The thought wandered away again and I didn't chase it.

I wondered briefly if I'd _ever_ be ready to date again, and unbidden an image of Sam, shirtless, his eight pack and well defined pecks on view popped into my mind. If I ever _was_ ready to try dating, he would be about the only guy I would consider. He'd been the only one to catch my attention since _He_ left, I'd been taken by surprise by my interest, but it was there nonetheless. Not that I would be able to allow anything serious with him; Like it or not, and whatever my dreams suggested about not having to die, Victoria _would_ be coming back for her revenge, and it would be cruel to allow Sam to develop any long term sort of feelings for me, only to hurt him by losing me when she killed me. A ripple of amusement coated my mind; How arrogant I was to assume that he would be interested in me just because I myself had felt a slight attraction to him. An image of myself in the mirror the morning that I pulled myself out of my pit crossed my thoughts and my amusement turned grim. No. He wouldn't find _that_ attractive, so it was foolish to think on it any longer. I sent the idea skittering away on the tide and again floated outside of any thought.

The next thing to find its way to the front of my mind was that frustrating feeling of missing something important about the Victoria dream. On so many occasions during my analysis of my dreams, I had filed things away in the 'haven't a clue pile' and I knew I'd be getting no rest until I started digging through that pile and _getting_ a clue. I knew I was missing something. Something about the extinct wolf shape shifters, and that if I could just work it out not only would the dreams stop, but I might have given myself a way out of death-by-Victoria. I resolved to give it more serious thought. Something I had already learned, even if only subconsciously was the key, I just had to keep poking through all I knew until I hit upon the right fact to finish the puzzle.

I let myself drift again, hoping for an answer to float through my brain, though I knew trying to force it in this state of mind was counter-productive. No. I should let it come naturally if it wanted too.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

I was aware, in the tiny alert part of my mind, that time was getting away from me once more, so I slowly began deliberately pulling my conscious thought forward again. The relaxed calm stayed with me though, making me feel more rested than I had in months. It was clear that this dozing, this _meditation_ I supposed it could be called, was doing me good. Both mentally and emotionally I felt so much better than I had just two days ago, and the well rested feeling must surely be doing my body some good too. If only because it was helping to restore a more normal appetite. Bit by bit I came back from my relaxed state, until I was once again fully aware of everything around me. Judging by the slightly darkening sky, I had been in my hollow for at least a couple of hours. If I didn't want to worry anyone about my whereabouts, I should head over to the Black's house sooner rather than later. Pulling my hood over my head against the rain, I pushed through the roots and out of my hollow and walked as quickly as I could, without tripping over my own feet, back to Billy and Jacob's house where I had parked up as usual.

Knocking at the door, I was slightly taken aback by Jake opening it mid bang. _"Ok, there's no way he's grown a couple of inches in three days." _I told myself._ "I must've just mis-judged it before." _I gave it a little more thought. Jake, Sam, Jared. They certainly made them big on the Rez. Either they had some amazingly good genetics, or they really were taking some kind of steroid, and I couldn't see Sam doing that, or Jared or Jake, for that matter. And Billy would never let that shit slide. Shrugging away the thought, I smiled up (and up) at Jacob and gesturing over my shoulder at the truck I said

"Hey! hows it going? Can I borrow you for a moment, Jake?. I've got someone to show you and then a proposition to make." I winced at my choice of words as I saw his expression light up in expectation. If I was to make it clear where we both stood in regards to our relationship, that was exactly the sort of comment I should avoid.

"Sure sure, Bells. What you got for me then?" He said, squeezing past me on the small porch, and heading down the steps to look in the truck.

"It's under the tarp." I pointed out. "I was wondering if you could take a look and tell mew if there's any hope for them, or if I should just drive them to the scrap yard now and forget about it." Intrigued now, he pulled the tarp to see what I was talking about.

"Hey. A pair of rusty pieces of shit. You do bring me the loveliest things, Bells." He turned, grinning at me. "So you want me to see if they can be saved? You do realise that even if they can be, and I'm not at all sure it's possible, it's going to cost a fair bit?"

"Yeah I know. I was hoping that if we raided all the scrap yards in the area, we might be able to find the parts and keep the costs down. In payment for your work, I was going to offer you your choice of the two finished products." I told him, attempting to sound persuasive without straying even a pinky toe over the line into flirting.

"Right. Well then lets get them into the workshop to had a proper look." He said, bending to haul one of them up.

"Careful, Jake." I warned him "They're _really_ he..." I was going to tell him how heavy the machines were, but before I could even finish, he'd picked one up, without any effort it seemed, and lowered it over the edge of the truck.

"We're not all tiny little wimpy rungs lie you, bells." He laughed, winking at me to remove any sting from his jibe. "They're so stripped down, they're not that heavy really. He added, passing the second bike over the back of my truck, and jumping down behind it.

Together we pushed the motorcycles out of the rain and into his workshop, him with apparent ease, and me with a lot of grunting, cursing, and slipping in the mud. Once we were under cover, Jake threw me an almost clean old towel to dry off a little and started looking over the bikes while I rubbed at my face and hair, trying to get the worst of the rain and mud off myself before I caught a cold. Before long it was clear he was in his own world, muttering things about "gaskets and HT leads", and a number of other things I didn't understand either. I sat myself quietly in a corner, still feeling nicely relaxed from my time on the beach, and content to just wait and watch til he remembered I was there. After about twenty more minutes, during which Jake had picked up a notebook and started making copious notes, he finally snapped back into the real world and seemed to remember my presence.

"Shit. Sorry, Bells. I was totally gone for a while there, huh?" I gave a little laugh.

"Yep. But it's ok, it was interesting to watch you figuring your way through things. Can you put me out of my misery though? Are they worth fixing?" I asked hopefully.

"It'll take maybe a couple hundred, but yeah I think I can get them both up and running again. Does Charlie know about this, or are we keeping it on the down low?" He asked, obviously not at all bothered either way. _"Boys. They're all the same. A bit of the forbidden makes everything more fun."_ I mentally rolled my eyes.

"It's ok. I talked to him about them on Saturday. He said that as long as I get someone to teach me to ride properly, and keep my promise never to ride mine on the road, then it's ok with him." I then went on. "Charlie thinks it would be a good idea for me to learn a bit about how to keep it running, in case I ever need to make emergency repairs, so if you don't mind, I'd be coming down a fair bit to watch you work and pick up what I can?" I hoped he'd be ok with it, as after a bit of thought, I'd decided Charlie actually had a point on this one.

"Sure sure. That's no problem." Jake replied, then turned to give me a shy kind of smile. "I'd really enjoy spending some time with you anyway." I gave a tight, polite smile back. _"Crap. Here it is. He came to the point much quicker than I thought he would."_ I marshalled my words carefully, I had to say this exactly right so that I didn't lose a friend, but also so the point was very clear.

"I'd enjoy spending time with you too. Not having any siblings of my own, I've always considered you my baby brother, and now we're older, it'll be nice to be friends as well as siblings." I said to him, carefully choosing my words. _"There. Shot him down nice and quick, and hopefully painlessly too. I've not only friend zoned him, I've sibling zoned him too. There's no coming back from that."_ I looked over to make sure I'd not upset him too much. He looked a little disappointed, but not too torn up, so I hoped I'd handle things right.

"Yeah. Well I've got a couple of sisters already, but I could always use more friends." He said "But you do know I was kinda hoping..." I cut him off before he could say any more, not wanting to add embarrassing him on top of upsetting and disappointing him.

"Charlie and Billy seemed to want to set us up, but don't worry, Jake, I set Charlie right. I told him that I was no where near ready to even think about dating again, and that even when or if I ever am ready, that you and I are just friends and don't see each other in a romantic way at all." Jacob's face fell a little further, but he quickly took the out I'd offered him.

"Thanks, Bells. The last thing we need is the dads on our cases, trying to force us together. Just good friends. Best friends even, but that's it?" There was a hint of a question at the end of his sentence there, and I answered him firmly.

"Best of friends. And that's _all_." I offered him a fist to bump, and he forced a smile and did so. I hid how much my knuckles hurt afterwards. The boy was very strong. Jake cleared his throat and change the subject.

"So I'll make some calls about these parts." He tapped the notebook still in his hand "Work out the cost and, if its not too rich for your blood, I'll arrange to collect whatever we need, or to have it sent here. That sound ok?" I grinned at him.

"It sounds perfect, thanks Jake. I really appreciate this." I looked over at the sorry looking pair of bikes. "How long do you reckon it will take?" He stared at the ceiling, mouth moving slightly as he made some calculations.

"Three weeks, maybe four? I don't think it would take much longer than that, anyway." He sounded sure of himself and I wondered to myself if I'd be ready to give riding a try by then, or if I'd still consider it too much of a change. I guessed I'd have to wait and see.

"Sounds great, Jake." I said with a smile. "I'd better be heading back home before Charlie start wondering where I've got to though. Are we still on for poker night with your friends on Friday night?" I asked. "Quill and Embry, wasn't it?" He gave me a big grin.

"Yeah we are." He said. "I'm oolong forward to watching you fleece those two. They're both far too full of themselves. Last time, when Quill won all my money, he walked around as pleased with himself as a dog with two dicks for weeks afterwards. He was unbearable. It's time he got what's coming to him." I laughed along with him.

"Awesome. I'm really looking forward to it. Just remember, don't warn either of them. I'll lose a little on purpose to start with, then turn the tables on them. It'll be fun." He smirked at the thought. I didn't feel too guilty about tricking them; it was only a nickel and dime game after all, so I wouldn't be bankrupting them, but from what Jake had told me about them, Quil at least was a cocky little ass, and taking him down a peg or too might be entertaining. I gave Jake a hug goodbye and went back out to my truck, leaving him in the workshop, still adding things to his notebook.


	16. Chapter 15: Routines and Real Friends

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit**.

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Chapter 15: Routines and Real Friends

Slowly, over the next few weeks, I began to build myself a rough routine; Wake, shower, dress, breakfast, school, La Push, home, and bed. I was careful not to be too rigid with keeping to it - it would do me no good to have forced myself out of one regimented lifestyle, only to fall into another, albeit more healthy one.

So I was happy to vary my routine if necessary - if Charlie wanted to spend some time with me, or if Angela and/or Ben offered to hang out one evening - but for the most part anyone who cared enough to be interested, would have a pretty good idea where I could be found at any given time.

On school days, I'd get myself up, before Charlie if I could to save us both from his breakfasts, and head off to school, where I'd split my time between talking with Ben and Angela, ignoring Mike, (who _clearly_ wasn't intelligent enough to understand the concept of pretending someone didn't exist, if his pointed comments whenever I was in hearing range about how "_Some people_ might assume that a girl who spent all her free time with a group of large, toned boys on the Rez, was spreading her legs for them all, not that _he_ thought so, but _some people_ might." were anything to go by) avoiding Lauren (who, having had her usual bullying outlet of vicious gossip-mongering cut off, had embarked on a campaign of "accidental" locker shoulder checks, toe crushings, and book bag whackings) and sometimes some actual studying.

After school I'd alternate between spending a little time in my hollow before heading over to the Black's place, going to the diner on the beach to hang out with Jacob, Quil, and Embry before heading over to the Black's place, and spending some time volunteering at the tribe's drop-in centre, where I might find myself doing anything from looking after the young children whose parents worked late, or cooking for the Rez's "Meals on Wheels" project, to tutoring kids from the Rez high school who needed extra help... before heading over to the Black's place.

My time in my little hollow was always peaceful and calming, and I began to find that the peace I acchieved lasted longer and longer into the following days. By experimenting at night, after waking from my nightmares and then again later each night from my other dreams, I discovered that I could find a similar peace through imagining the sounds of the waves and matching my breathing to the rhythm, allowing myself to completely relax and mentally float away, but while it was similar, it wasn't quite the same quality of calm and relaxation I would find on the beach, so I continued to visit my spot when I could.

My time hanging with Jake, Quil, and Embry was relaxing in a different way. They had such a joy for life about them, such an energy, that I couldn't help but feel swept up along with them, and my smiles, which since I crawled out of my pit had almost always been small and reserved, began to feel more natural on my face, and would break out more freely and often. Getting to know them on that first poker night had been a revelation to me of how friends could be as close as brothers and, after riding out about half an hour of Quil's indignation at being schooled _and fleeced_ by a girl, I was proud that he had accepted me as a member of the group as close to him as either of the other two. Embry had accepted me with open arms after the first hand I flattened him with, his more calm, quiet manner was a relaxing balm to the inner turmoil I had been feeling. They had both been so sceptical when Jake walked me in to his kitchen that night, where the other two boys were already sitting, loudly mocking each other about who was going to be leaving with all the money.

_"Guys, I've brought us a fourth to play, we can finally get a proper game going." Jake said, wandering in ahead of me, I was completely hidden behind him, his giant form totally obscuring their view of my much smaller one. _

_"Cool." Came a voice from the left of the table, "Always nice to have fresh meat. As long as he doesn't bitch to much when I take all his money, he's more than welcome."_

_"When _who_ takes his money" this voice was quieter, but filled with amusement at the other boy's bravado. "I think you'll find, if you think back carefully, that _I've_ taken a hell of a lot more money off _you_ in the past than the other way round." I smiled at the friendly banter and peered around Jake to catch a glimpse of his friends. _

_"This is Bella, guys. Try not to be quite as weird as you normally are. We wouldn't want to scare her off now, would we? Bella, this is Quil" He pointed at the loud one, "and Embry." He jerked his head towards the quieter boy. Giving them each a shove, Jake sat down at the table with them, and I stepped over to pull out my own chair. _

_"Hi guys." I gave a little wave. "I hope you don't mind me joining your game. I've only ever played against Jake or my dad, so I thought doing a proper poker night might be fun." I said truthfully, not adding the fact that I always wiped the floor with both of them. _

_"Erm. Hi Bella. Nice to meet you." Said Embry politely, sending Jake a questioning glance. _

_"Yeah hi there." Said Quil with a slightly leering smile. "So nice to meet you. I'm Quil Ateara. But you remember me, right?" I looked at him, confused, and turned to Jake for assistance, but before Jake could speak, Quil snapped his fingers and said "Oh no, thats right; we've only met in my dreams." Jake and Embry rolled their eyes and snorted at his over the top flirting and I blushed, not knowing quite how to react. _

_"Erm. Ok. Well" I had no idea what to say. Luckily, Embry rescued me. _

_"Don't mind him, Bella. He swallowed about five pounds of cheese when he was little, and it's been coming out ever since in the form of god-awful pick up lines." I giggle a little and started to relax. Quil gave Embry's shoulder a rough shove, then turned to Jake. _

_"Dude. A girl? I thought we were going to get a proper game going. Now we'll spend half the night explaining over and over that a flush beats a straight. No offense" he added hurriedly, turning back to me. I waved him off. _

_"None taken. It's ok. I know the rules. I'll try not to bather you with questions all night." Out the corner of my eye I could see Jake bating the inside of his mouth, trying desperately not to laugh. _

_"So shall we play? Or just spend the evening talking about it?" He asked his friends, and we all dug out our change while Embry shuffled and began to deal. I methodically lost hand after hand, raising when I should fold, and folding when I should re-raise and after an hour or so, not only was I down to my last few coins, but I had faded into the background as far as Jake's friends were concerned. They chatted amongst themselves as if I wasntr even there and I was free to watch each of them and learn their tells. Embry would tap his left heel repeatedly when he was excited, and blink too much when bluffing. Quil rubbed the tip of his thumb against the tips of his fore and middle fingers on his left hand when bluffing, and checked his cards too often when he thought he had a good hand. I don't need to watch Jake; I already knew that he bit the inside of his mouth when he had a decent hand, and rubbed the back of his neck when bluffing. Finally I got the hand I'd been waiting for; a pair of jacks. Not the best I could hope for, but enough to work with. I sighed. _

_"Guess I've got no choice but to play this hand." I said, sounding resigned. "I won't have enough for the ante on the next one. Embry smiled sympathetically and just called, jake, knowing what I was up to, wisely folded, but Quil shot me a crafty grin and said. "Sorry, Bella. Maybe I should be chivalrous and just fold, but this hands too good to waste, and I bet Embry on the way over that I'd clean out whoever Jake brought to join us. Nothing personal. I will just call instead of raising though." He added, after getting stern glares from the other two. I looked at his left hand. _Rub rub rub_. I shrugged and gave a sad nod. Jake dealt the flop. A six, a nine, and a jack, all unsuited. I checked, and Embry followed suit, but Quil raised, forcing me all in. With all our cards face up on the table (my pair of jacks, Embry's queen and jack of hearts, and Quil's seven and ten of clubs - I _knew_ he had nothing good) Jake dealt the last two cards a three of spades and a four of diamonds. I smiled and pulled the pot over in front of me. "Finally. I won a hand! I gave a little fake squeal of excitement and saw Jake cover his smile with one hand. _

_"Well done, Bella. You live on for another hand." Embry said, and Quil gave me a little grin. _

_"I'll get you next time." He jokingly shook his fist at me, and Embry took over the deal. I started to play properly, raking in pot after pot after pot, til it was just Quil and I left. He was down to just a few coins, while in front of me was a veritable mountain of change. I had a nothing hand. A pair of threes, with nothing of use in the flop. I judged that Quil had at least a pair of tens, maybe the start of a straight, but I was raising him hard, and when the turn card was dealt, I made a bet that would put him all in. He chickened out and folded. He only had enough left for one last hand, and Embry dealt. I got a pair of kings, but I just checked, faking a bad hand. Quil saw his chance and tried to bluff big, like he had a pair of aces. I just checked when I could, and called him at his every raise and let him go all in, trying to force me to fold. When he saw my hand he was livid, knowing I'd played him. Of course it didn't help his mood anyway when the final card dealt was another king, giving me three of a kind, when he still had a handful of nothing. He sulked for the next half hour, while Jake and Embry laughed at his childishness, and I was a little worried I'd alienated one of Jakes friends, but once he'd finished sulking, Quil gave me a little grin and said. _

_"Guess that's what I get for assuming girls can't play poker, eh?" I laughed and told him_

_"Don't feel too bad, Quil. Neither Jake nor my dad have ever beaten me, and Billy refuses point blank to play with me after Jake and Charlie told him about how I play." Quil's answering grin turned a little evil. _

_"Sometime, we should take you to play the Elders. They hold a pretty big game once a month. You could make us all _rich_" he gave a 'Bond bad guy/Dr Evil' kind of laugh, and rubbed his hands melodramatically and we all burst out laughing._

It had been a fun night, and I'd made two new, good friends.

Jake, Quil, Embry, and I made an arrangement to play every Friday night, though the boys all begged that we only play for change once a month and stick to matches or bottle tops the rest of the time. I didn't mind. I wasn't playing to make money, just to enjoy the company of my new friends. The last Friday though, Embry hadn't shown up. Apparently he'd been off school, sick for a few days, and neither I nor the others had heard from him. I hoped he was ok.

My time at the drop-in centre often found me bumping into Sam. Apparently he'd been volunteering there for years, and I really enjoyed working with him. Banging elbows with him in the kitchen as we cooked meals for the older members of the tribe who struggled to look after themselves, watching him play dress-up with the really little kids while I refereed a pool tournament between the older ones, and sitting opposite him at a table while each of us talked high school kids through whatever homework assignments they were struggling with. My noticing Sam's attractiveness before, had crossed into a little crush on the guy, and I was strangely ok with that. As the days went by, I was gradually beginning to let go of _Him_, not just in my head, but also with my heart, and as the pain slowly faded, bit by bit, so my crush on Sam grew. I knew I didn't stand a chance at dating him; he was always kind and friendly, and often joked with me, but I wasn't going to let myself read anything into it. I might've been looking a lot healthier, having put some weight back on, gotten rid of most of the bags under my eyes, and having spent a lot of time outdoors, which made my skin look more like skin and less like tracing paper, but I wasn't stupid enough to imagine myself in his league, and so I very carefully didn't allow myself to imagine he might ever be interested in me in any way other that as a friend.

The only sour point to my time in La Push was the issues Jake, Quil and Embry had with Sam, Jared, and their friend Paul. My friends _really_ didn't like them, calling them hall monitors gone mad, and insinuating that Sam was running a gang on the Rez. I didn't understand what their problem with Sam or Jared was. Both of them were great guys, and whenever I spent time with either or both of them, I really enjoyed myself, but Jake, Quil and embry either couldn't or wouldn't see in them what I saw.

Them disliking Paul, I could kind of understand though. One time at the drop-in centre, I was stuck with tutoring him. He was a truly strange guy. I could feel the anger and resentment rolling off him, but whenever he lost his cool, and opened his mouth to (I assume) curse at me, he seemed to end up lost for words, his mouth opening and closing with just a choked, almost strangled noise coming from him, as the anger in his eyes increased and his hands even shook with fury. I guessed that a lot of his anger came from his struggles in school. I could tell he wasn't stupid, but he had real problems with his reading, his writing was dreadful, and his spelling worse. I ended up picking up some literature about dyslexia for him from the councillor at my school, but I was a bit nervous to give it to him. Maybe I'd give it to Sam and ask him to pass it on. I was fairly certain that was where Paul's difficulties lay, and with the right support, there was no reason why he shouldn't do just as well as any of his class mates.

After the drop-in centre, or the diner, or spending time alone in my hollow, my time over at the Black's was spent watching Jake fix the bikes, and also cooking for Jake, Billy, Charlie and myself. With me spending so much time on the Rez, Charlie had taken to joining me at Billy's for dinner as a group. It worked out well for all of us; I still got to cook and spend time with Charlie, he got to hang out with his best friend, and all three guys got to eat healthy, home-cooked, tasty meals instead of constant take out and TV dinners. Everyone was happy.

The bikes were almost ready though, and I had to decide before much longer if I thought I was ready to make a bigger change and go from 'quiet and cautious Bella' to a Bella who takes a risk every now and then.

Ever since the rogue bear had been seen by the surviving hiker, there had been numerous sightings reported, though no more missing hikers. Charlie said that with a dangerous bear on the loose, people had stopped going out into the forest, and that it would be that way until the bear was found and destroyed. Whatever the reason for it, his workload at the station was once again back to normal for a town the size of Forks, so we were able to enjoy more time together, particularly on the weekends. As much as I wasn't really interested in fishing, I would still go with him one day each weekend, and take along my homework. We would sit together, side by side on the banks of he river, often in a companionable silence as he fished and I studied, juggling my books, pens, notebooks, and the large umbrella I always took to protect myself and my homework from the ever present rain. At Charlie's insistence, we never went far from the road on our fishing trips, always remaining in sight of my truck in case of the rogue bear making an appearance. Perhaps it was this nearness to passing traffic that caused the feeling of being watched that I sometimes got. I should say _feelings_ of being watched as there were two distinct impressions; One was completely benign, the sort of feeling I might get on a train, noticing another passenger looking at me for want of anything else to stare at, whereas the second feeling was much more uncomfortable. There was a sort of uncomfortable itch to it, a _danger_, which would set me on edge whenever I felt it, and leave me rolling my shoulders, trying to alleviate the tension. I only mentioned it once to Charlie, as the one time I did, he immediately packed us up, cutting short our outing, and quickly getting us back into the truck and on the way home. I guessed he figured it might've been the bear prowling about, as he certainly looked pretty tense himself.

The other day of my weekend would be spent catching up with the week's laundry, finishing up my homework, and making a run to the Rez grocery store. After the gossip incident at the supermarket in Forks, Charlie point blank refused to spend another penny there, preferring the higher prices, longer drive, and more limited choice of the Rez store. I knew that before long I'd have to make a run to the larger supermarket in Port Angeles to stock up on things I just couldn't get at the Rez store, but I wasn't going to complain; he was showing his support of me in a very clear way to the gossips. Sending them a message that said "Don't mess with my daughter".

When Charlie had questioned the bruises on my arms from locker checks, and I'd told him what was going on, he had asked me if I wanted him to make a complaint to the principal about Lauren's new tactics and I'd asked him not to. She wasn't able to do much more than she already was without getting herself in a lot of trouble, and petty though it might've been, I _really_ wanted to give her enough rope to hang herself. Sooner or later she'd go too far, and despite always being the one on the receiving end at the moment, I was looking forward to seeing her get what she had coming.

And so this was how my life carried on, until the last Sunday in February, which is when one phone call was the the beginning of everything changing. Again.

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**Maybe a little too much detail on the poker game? Let me know; Quil's not the only one Bella will end up schooling over a pack of cards in this story, so I'd appreciate the feedback so that when I write the next poker game, I can make improvements if needed. **


	17. Chapter 16: Shocks and Sharing

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit**.

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Chapter 16: Shocks and Sharing

Sam POV

Billy and I must've sat there, frozen in shock like a pair of ice sculptures for nearly a whole minute before the Chief finally broke the tableau by speaking again.

"Oh for God's sake, you two if you're not going to speak, then at least _breathe_ would you? Billy might be easily portable for trips to the hospital, but I think it would take about three of me to carry Sam out to the truck." I let out a burst of surprised laughter, quickly joined by both Billy and the Chief, and the thick tension in the room eased a tiny bit. I still didn't know just how to start this conversation though, so I looked to Billy for help; the Chief was _his_ friend, so maybe he would have a better idea of how to handle this than I did. Billy leaned forward a little in his wheelchair.

"So Charlie. How about we start with just _how_ you know about the wolves?" He asked with a calm I'm pretty sure he didn't really feel. _I_ certainly didn't.

"Ah. So there _is_ more than one then." The chief said, pleased. "I was almost positive that Sam here was one, and I had my suspicions about Jared too. I assume he _is_ the other?" I was impressed.

"So you didn't _know_. You just had a pretty good assumption?" I asked him. "What would've happened if you were wrong, and the rogue bear really was just that - a bear?"

"Well then you and Billy would've had a good laugh at my expense, and I'd have eventually bought both of your silences with the threat of no more of Bella's cooking." He gave us a smug look. It would've worked; Bella's cooking was too good to miss out on just to keep up a joke against the Chief. "If there's one thing I've learnt over my years as a police officer, it's how to get information out of people. Make them think you know more than you really do, and it's amazing just how much information they spill without realising their mistake." I was impressed. I might be a wolf, but the Chief was a wiley old fox.

"Ok then, Charlie. You might've gotten a certain amount out of us already, but this is too important for us to play games with you." Billy said seriously. "Sam and I are just going to sit here nice and quiet, and you can tell us just exactly _what_ and, more importantly, _how_ you know." I nodded at Billy, and we both sat back with our lips sealed, clearly indicating that we had no intention of speaking again til the chief spilled.

"Ok. Sounds fair." The Chief agreed. "I grew up hearing Billy telling me bits and pieces of the tribes legends when we were kids, I never took them seriously, and he knew it. I always just took them as campfire stories, made up to scare us kids, but with the increasing number of missing people in the last few weeks, and the bear sightings, I started to wonder a little.

At first I laughed at myself, told myself I was being a silly, gullible old man, but then I started noticing things. Things most people would've overlooked unless they'd had the police training I've had, combined with the stories from my childhood." He stood up and walked to Billy's fridge, pulling out three beers and offering one each to Billy and I. Opening his beer, he took a long swig, then continued with his story.

"The first thing I noticed was, of course, the sheer size of you, Sam. Not that it's unheard of for a guy of, what were you, seventeen?" I nodded. "Yeah, ok a guy of seventeen to have a growth spurt, but seriously, you were growing inches a week there for a while, as far as I could tell from the odd glance at you when we passed each other on the Rez or in town. I admit my first thought was that you were taking some sort of steroid, but short of catching you in possession in town, there wasn't much I could do; Iv'e got no authority on the Rez, as you know. A few weeks later, I began to notice how much time you were spending here at Billy's place, Sam." The Chief said, turning to look at me as he sat back down. "Even though you're much closer to Jake's age than Billy's you never came to hang out with the kid. He makes no secret of his dislike of you, no offense, so it was clear you were spending time with Billy. I couldn't work out why that would be, and when I noticed you were also spending a lot of time with Harry Clearwater, despite breaking up with his daughter, and also with old Quil, something began to stir in the back of my head. For some reason, the three Elders of the tribal council had a special interest in you, and when two of those Elders had a reason to dislike you - Billy because of his son's issues with you, and Harry because of his daughter's - and yet treated you as a friend and equal ... Well the nosy old police chief in me was fascinated."

I turned to stare at Billy with growing unease; if someone outside the tribe had reasoned this far, and then followed his line of reason to find the truth, how many others _within_ the tribe might do the same? Billy looked as concerned as I was, but made a 'shushing' gesture with one hand. We should hear him out completely before we did anything else. The Chief was continuing on. "It was a long while before anything new caught my attention, and so the other things remained just an annoying niggle in the back of my head, popping up front every so often to bug me. The next thing was how you always wander around half naked." He smirked at me. "Now I don't care how proud you are of your muscles, running about all the time shirtless in winter in Washington ain't exactly subtle, son." I blushed. _I_ knew that going around in just shorts was nothing to do with showing off my physique, but I could see how it would look to everyone else. "I'm guessing you just don't feel the cold at all" the Chief asked, and I shook my head. He smiled and carried on. "Ok, so you don't need to cover up, but you might want to give a little thought to putting on a shirt every now and then anyway, at least in town, to keep people from talking. Now after I'd noticed how you dressed, or didn't as the case may be, I started paying closer attention. Again it's been a while since I came up with anything new, but then there was yesterday." He settled back into his chair a little, placing one ankle on the other knee in an outward sign of relaxation. I didn't buy it. _"He's just as tense as Billy and I. He's just refusing to show it."_ I thought.

"What do you mean, Chief?" I asked him, wondering what exactly about the day before had tipped the scales and brought him to his final conclusion.

"Really, son, you should call me Charlie. It seems to me that when a man knows you turn into a giant wolf every so often, you should be able to call him by his first name." I smiled.

"Ok, Charlie, thanks. But anyway, what about yesterday?"

"It was several things. First, I got the first good look at Jared that I've had in a while and he's just a tall, and shirtless as you. One could be an anomaly, two is suspicious, and adding Jake and the growth I've noticed in him lately, three makes a pattern, but I'm guessing we'll come back to that latter.

Second, you and Jared seemed to reacting to, and sometimes laughing at, things I couldn't hear. Yet you both reacted at the exact same time, like you'd heard something. My hearing's pretty good, so I figured if it was something _I_ couldn't hear, then it was something _no-one_ could hear. Yet you two did. It was interesting.

Third, the amount of food the two of you packed away, yet _still_ looked like you could finish off what was left in the lasagne pan, along with whatever was left on my and Bella's plates, and still have room for desert.

Fourth was the way you and Jared sped out of my place just after I was called about the missing hikers, and the final thing was the fact that I set out just a couple of minutes after you, when you were 'headed off to do another quote on the Rez' yet just around the corner, I drove past your parked truck with neither of you anywhere to be seen. At the time, I was far too busy to do much more than file the fact away for later, but last night, after a few mad dreams, as my brain hooked all the facts I've learned together into a pretty picture, I came to the conclusion that maybe all those stories Billy used to tell me weren't quite as fictional as I'd always assumed, and maybe the Quileute tribe was the unknowing charge of at least one, and most probably two very large wolf protectors." He finished his tale and chugged the rest of his beer, looking between Billy and I to see our reaction. _"Holy shit. He worked the whole thing out himself from circumstantial evidence, niggling feelings and 'a few mad dreams'. The man's brilliant. He's wasted on the force in a small town like Forks. He could've done wonders on big cases in Seattle."_ I was seriously impressed. Worried, but impressed. Was it just him, just the way his mind worked? Or had other started putting together the clues? Had he told anyone else? _"Oh fuck me sideways with a chainsaw. Has he told Bella?"_

"Alright then, Charlie." I started, feeling a little weird calling the Chief by his first name. "So you know that Jared and I are werewolves, you suspect that Jake might be too, and you understand that us wolves are here to protect the tribe." I summed up, taking my turn to o fetch us all a new beer apiece from the fridge. "What we need to know from you is simple. How much of the wolf stuff do you actually know and understand, who else you've told about it, and _what you intend to do with the information_." Billy nodded along, taking the beer I handed him as I sat back down. Charlie and I each opened our own.

"I guess I don't know much about the wolves at all really. Just that you exist, and that you protect the tribe." He answered, taking a swig of his new beer.

"So you know about the cold ones, the vampires, too then?" Billy asked him, surprised. Charlie shot beer out of his nose, choking and spluttering, and alarmed, I reached over and pounded him on the back to help him regain control.

"Vampires too? Shit. Ok, no I didn't know that bit. That's what you protect the tribe from? Is _that_ what's been taking all the missing hikers and campers? _Vampires_?" Billy and I nodded gravely

"That's what our wolves are made for, Charlie. To kill vampires. They protect the tribe, and recently the town too, from the leeches, keeping them from killing and feeding in the area, chasing them off, or killing them outright." Billy told him with pride.

"Well _damn_. I never really put any thought into that part of your old stories, Billy. I remember you talking about the cold ones, but the word _vampire_ never really came to mind. So these disappearances lately, are they the work of one single vampire, or several different ones?" He asked, his police hat back on for a moment. I chose to answer that one.

"We think its all down to just one. A red headed female who seems determined to either get into town, or onto the Rez for some reason. She says she's come for what she's owed." This thought made me growl under my breath "She'll get it too. Especially as, as far as I'm concerned, what _she's owed_ is being ripped apart and burnt." Charlie grimaced at the violent image.

"Sorry Charlie" I said, "but that's the only way to make sure they _stay_ dead. They have to be dismembered and burnt, or they can reassemble themselves, given enough time, and return to kill some more." He nodded reluctantly, understanding, but not liking what I had said. "We managed to chase the red head off again last night before she killed the second hiker, but I'm pretty sure she'll be back. She's very persistent, and we don't know what it is she's after." I scowled. "She's also amazingly good at getting out of trouble. We had her pretty much pinned down last night, but she _still_ escaped." Billy interrupted me.

"All this is very interesting of course, but we still need to know, Charlie, who have you told? And what do you intend to do with your information?" Charlie looked surprised.

"I've told no-one." He said, and I breathed a sigh of relief, echoed by Billy. "For one, who would believe me? Anyone I told would assume I've cracked under the pressure if being the chief of police, and I'd soon be sending out invites for people to visit me in my lovely new white room, featuring deluxe padded walls." He gave a little chuckle. "As for what I intend to do, well... Nothing. Unless there's anything I can do to help out sometime, I don't think there's anything to do. Although I would like to ask one question, and maybe a favour?" He looked at me rather than Billy.

"I can't make any promises without knowing what it is, Charlie, but if its something I can do, without causing danger to the tribe or us wolves, then I'll try." I said.

"I wanted to know; just how close to town is this vampire getting?" I grimaced.

"Too close for my liking." I answered. The closest scent we've caught was less than a mile from the edge of town, but I've not worked out a pattern to her attacks." He quickly got up from his chair and said

"Hold on a minute. I'll be right back." He left the room and headed out to his truck. A moment later he was back, carrying a map of the area. He spread it out on the floor and we all crowded round it. Pulling out a marker pen from his pocket, he marked the last known locations of all those still missing, and then the place where the only other body to turn up had been found. Finally he marked the place we'd found and fought the red head the night before.

"May I?" I asked, holding out my hand for the pen. Charlie passed it to me and I went to work, marking each spot we'd encountered the leech ourselves, and then the spots where we'd come across her scent, explaining what each mark I was making related to. Finally I marked the Cullen mansion. Charlie gave a questioning look at that, but let it pass for the time being. I was relieved. I wasn't sure how well it would sit with him that his daughter had dated a vampire.

We all sat back and examined the map in shock. The bright red dots on the map formed a sort of corridor leading through the forest towards town. This wasn't a surprise really, but what was a surprise was that the corridor was leading in the general direction of Charlie and Bella's street. Charlie spoke first.

"I don't know if what she wants is in my street, or if she's just identified the street as a weak spot, and the easiest place to get into town without being spotted, as it is that street that runs closest to the forest edge, but hits makes the favour I was going to ask a little more urgent." He said, once again looking directly at me rather than Billy. "I don't like the thought of Bella home alone as much as she is with me working different shifts. Now she's not working anymore, she's even more likely to be at home by herself more often, and with this vampire heading directly towards our street, I'd like to ask if she can spend more time here on the Rez. I'd say its probably the safest place in the area right now, and I'd feel a hell of a lot better being out at work if I knew she was safe and not alone." I didn't even need to think about it.

"Of course." I said, quickly echoed by Billy. He continued

"Bella's never any trouble to have around, Charlie. She'll be more than welcome here whenever you can talk her into it. I'd guess your only problem will be getting her to agree. You know how stubborn she can be if she can't see a reason for what's being asked of her." They both smiled affectionately.

"I've already thought about that" Charlie said, his smile turning a bit calculating. "She picked up a couple of motorcycle wrecks yesterday. Not much more than a big pile of rusted crap in my opinion, but she asked me for permission to try and get them running again, but she's got no idea of who to ask." Billy began to grin himself, clearly catching Charlie's drift quicker than me.

"Well now, I'm sure Jake would be _delighted_ to offer his help." Billy was all but rubbing his hands in glee, and I had a bad feeling that I knew what the two older men were planning. I was right.

"Yep, I thought as much." Charlie said with a smirk. "And who knows what else might develop while they're working. I'll suggest to her that she'd be sensible to learn a little about how to do basic repairs while Jake's working on them. That'll keep her here more often, and if they're in each others company that much ..." He tailed off. Insinuating that the outcome would be a foregone conclusion. My heart sank. Both fathers clearly believed that it would only take close proximity for Bella and Jacob to develop feelings for each other. They both knew both their own child and the other's well. Who was to say they wouldn't be proved right. I interrupted.

"So, Charlie. Earlier you were vying suspicions about Jake being one of us wolves. It wouldn't bother you, then, to have Bella involved with one of us?" I tried to keep my voice light. _"La la la, just asking an innocent question, la la la, no ulterior motives or agendas here, la la la"_ I willed him not to notice how truly interested I was, for two very different reasons, in his answer. He didn't seem to read anything into my question, although Billy was casting me curious and slightly suspicious glances.

"Why would it bother me?" Charlie asked with genuine confusion. "You're all good guys, good _men_, and who would she ever be safer with?" Charlie really was an exceptional man. He'd discovered that werewolves really do exist, he'd learnt that we tear apart and burned other sentient creatures, even if they _were_ blood-sucking killers, and he was so non-judgemental that he was genuinely confused as to why he might be concerned about his daughter becoming involved with one of said werewolves. Exceptional.

"Good point, Charlie." Was all I could say. If I succeeded in arguing against Jake, based on his mere _potential_ wolfiness, I would only be shooting any case I might make for myself down in flames. Charlie looked at Billy.

"So _is_ Jake...?" He broke off, not knowing how to word his question. But Billy got the gist.

"Not yet." He answered. But he's well on his way through the change. And once the change begins, there's no stopping it. Sam reckons Jake's got a few weeks yet though." Billy's voice held that mix of sadness and pride that I heard whenever we discussed Jakes change between us. I understood it completely. I felt it was important to give Charlie a warning.

"Once he does make the change, Charlie. It won't be safe for him to be around Bella for a while. Our tempers rule our phasing completely for a air while when we're new. And anger is never far below the surface. It would only take the tiniest thing to set him off, and as she doesn't know about us, we wouldn't be able to warn her out of he way in time. If he phased too close to her he could do some serious damage." Charlie was asking the warning seriously, and he considered for a moment.

"Maybe we can tell her that Jake's sick or something, then stall her as long a possible until he's in control?" He suggested. It seemed a workable plan. I hoped for Bella's sake we'd be able to pull it off. She'd already been abandoned once. Both by the boyfriend, and by the entire family. I hated the thought of taking someone else away from her. Especially when she wouldn't understand why.

That all decided, we sat back and Billy and I began to carefully pick through what Charlie might already know from the stories he'd heard as a kid, and what we felt he _should_ know, taking care to avoid anything that we weren't sure he should know. We could always give him more information later, but we couldn't un-tell him something if we later decided it was a mistake to let him know that articular bit.

So for the next half hour, we answered questions as best we could, telling him about the pack structure, owning up about Paul's existence as a member, and letting him know about the enhancements our human forms were granted as part of the deal. When we finally reached the end of what we could tell him right away, he slapped his hands on his thighs and stood up. Shaking my hand, then Billy's, he thanked us for being so open and honest with him, and I walked with him to the door. Just as he was about to get into his cruiser he turned back to me and said.

"Oh. I almost forgot. When we were looking at the map?" I nodded

"Yeah? Did you forget to mark something, Charlie?"

"No" he replied. "I was wondering. Why did you mark the Cullens place?"

For the second time that evening, I froze.

* * *

**Ok. Last time I did this to you I wasn't at all sorry; I found it rather amusing, especially as I knew I was switching povs in the following chapter. **

**This time I am a ****_little _****sorry, but I promise that I'm not changing povs again, so you can find out how Charlie takes the news says soon as I update next. Which as you know, I try to do each evening. **


	18. Chapter 17: Promises and Paisley Dresses

**A giant thank you to everyone who has left me such wonderful reviews. I'm glad you're all enjoying the story, and hope you'll all stick with me. There's lots more to come. :0)**

**Also thanks to Pichon, who gave me a little thought about Charlie to run with. ;0)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 17: Promises and Paisley Dresses

Before I started speaking, I wondered how badly Charlie was likely to take this piece of news, and if the answer was "very", whether Bella would ever forgive me for blowing her secret for her.

"How much do you remember about the cold ones in the stories Billy used to tell you, Charlie?" I asked him, stalling for time as I tried to think of a way out of telling him just what the Cullens really were.

"Lets see ..." Charlie began, searching his memory. "I remember he described them as fast, unnaturally beautiful, icy cold, with hard skin like stone. I think that's all. But really, I don't see what this has to do with the Cull..." He broke off, it was his turn to stand frozen as he realised how the description of the cold ones matched up to his daughter's ex-boyfriend and his family. "No." He finally spoke again. "You're telling me that the Cullen family are _vampires_? The _whole family_?" I nodded grimly. "Did she know" he asked me, and I reluctantly nodded again.

"We're pretty sure she did. Billy tried to warn her away from them early on in the relationship, but she shot him down, saying it was her business, not his." I shrugged helplessly. "There wasn't anything else we could do without breaking the treaty, so we kept as close an eye on the situation as we could from a distance.

"Treaty?" He asked, "What treaty? Why would you have a treaty with a family of vampires? Did they hurt her? Was she in danger? _Is_ she in danger?" The questions boiled out of him at such a rate I couldn't hope to keep up.

"Slow down, Charlie." I told him. "I'll try to answer all your questions, buts lets deal with them one at a time shall we?" I gathered my thoughts. "Ok, lets answer the most important ones first. No, they didn't hurt her as far as we know. Well apart from the number her ex did on her when they left, that is." We both grimaced. "Yes, she probably was in danger, no matter how _alternative_ a lifestyle the family led. Accidents happen, and mistakes can be made, however _careful_ people try to be." I held up my hand as he began to ask the obvious question, stopping him from speaking.

"Hold on, Charlie, I'll come back to that one in a moment, lets answer the first few questions first. I continued on "No, I don't think she's in any danger now. They did a thorough job of packing up and leaving no trace or clues as to where they've gone. I don't think they'll be back this way for several generations. Now as to why we had a treaty with them ... They first came to this area 70 Years ago, and the doctor, their leader, met with Billy's grandfather, Ephraim Black. The leeches explained that they weren't like the others of their kind; they hunted animals, drinking from their blood, instead of humans, and claimed that it made them less violent, and more able to assimilate themselves into human society. Ephraim made an agreement with them that as long as they never bit a human, and kept of the tribal lands, the Quileute tribe wouldn't expose their secret, and the wolves wouldn't hunt them down." Charlie looked confused.

"But how could you tell that they weren't killing humans? They'd hardly do it where you could see them, or leave the evidence lying around, if it would break the treaty."

"We'd be able to tell by the colour of their eyes." I explained. "Leeches that drink human blood have red eyes, the animal diet caused the Cullens' eyes to turn that weird gold colour." He nodded in understanding.

"So that's why none of the Elders would visit the hospital where Carlisle worked." He mused. "All this time I was arguing with Billy over his 'unreasonable prejudice' against the family, and it turns out he had a perfectly good reason for keeping away from them." He rubbed his hand over his face, looking troubled. "What was Bella _thinking_? She _knew_ what they were, but still went merrily on her way, putting herself into danger every day with them." Personally I agreed, but I couldn't bring myself to condemn her any more than her own actions already had.

"I think she was just a girl in love for the first time, Charlie. You know as well as I do that there's not much thinking goes on when love is in the equation" he nodded ruefully

"Yes, and she's always been so stubborn that once she had decided she was in love with him, she wouldn't have let anything stand in her way." He agreed, and I felt a little admiration for her strong mindedness, as well as a little hope for my own cause; if she had been willing to risk her own life to remain in a committed relationship with a leech, surely she might consider a little _casual dating_ with a werewolf? Charlie's face firmed, "Even if that's the case, I'm going to have to have words with my daughter. To have put herself in that danger, to have no thought towards her own safety, to have _lied_ to me over and over? I knew there was more going on that she was telling me. I just thought she had more respect for me than to keep such important things from me." He looked so sad and disappointed.

"Charlie you _can't_ say _anything_." I warned him urgently. "How would you tell her you found out? If you say anything to her about the Cullens, she'll never believe you suddenly just realised it yourself out of the blue." I could see he knew I was right. I suspected he was just sounding off, trying to let some of his anger and disappointment out while he could. "Besides," I continued "how could she have told you? There's no way you would've believed her, and I'd be willing to bet she was sworn to secrecy. I may not know her that well, and certainly not as well as you do, but I don't get the impression she's the sort of person who breaks promises. Promises like not telling secrets. Promises like the one I'm going to have to ask you to make about our secret." His shoulders sagged.

"Yeah I know." He said, sounding a little defeated. "And I know it had to have eaten at her every time she was forced to lie to me. She hates lying. Especially to those she loves." He sounded proud of her, and I could understand why.

"So we're agreed then?" I asked. "You won't say anything?"

"We're agreed, I promise. " He said, then a sly grin crept over his face. "But I reserve the right to tear a strip off her about lying to me and putting herself in danger if she ever finds out about you wolves by herself. I'll ground her for the rest of her life." He chuckled. "Even if she's fifty when she finds out." I laughed along with him.

Charlie got into his cruiser and left for home, and I went back inside to see Billy.

"He's a crafty one." Was the first thing Billy said when I walked in. I gave him a confused look, and he chuckled a little. "You think he'd really forgotten to ask you about the Cullens til he was just about to leave? Not Charlie. He knew damn well that I would've helped you duck around the question and avoid answering, so he waited til he had us separated and _then_ asked. Like I said; crafty." I had to agree. Charlie Swan was sharper than a bag full of scalpels.

* * *

I didn't see anything of Bella for a while, but I knew she'd been on the Rez after school each day. I often caught her wonderful scent as I walked along the beach, most often it was coming from that little hollow I'd found her in before. But sometimes I caught it coming from the diner on the beach, mixed in with Jake's and a couple of others. I knew from talking with Billy that she was spending time with Jake, mending the bikes she'd picked up, just as we'd planned, and that she'd also been spending a lot of time hanging with a couple of friends of Jake's - Quil Ateara and Embry Call. I was glad she was spending so much time in La Push without being forced into it, and I made a suggestion to Billy that he could mention the drop-in centre to her, and see if she'd be willing to volunteer there every once in a while as another excuse to get her to the Rez. The fact that I was often there volunteering myself had nothing to do with my suggestion. At all. Absolutely nothing whatsoever.

The first time we bumped into each other at the drop-in centre turned out not quite how I might've planned it.

I was minding some little kids for the afternoon. A lot of members of the tribe worked hours that didn't exactly fit in around the local school or nursery, and so, rather than having to pay out huge chunks of their pay on child minders, they would have them brought straight from their school to the drop-in centre to play until they finished work. On this particular day we were playing dress-up. The little ones were having a fantastic time, pulling an old paisley dress over my head, tugging on it til it nearly ripped as they tried to force my too wide shoulders to fit. I was stuck, with my arms trapped over my head, half in and half out of the sleeves, and my head and face still completely covered, and running around after the kids, their delighted screams leading my way, when I suddenly ran straight into something bigger. Some_one_ bigger. Someone bigger who smelled amazing. _"Seriously. Bella shows up _now_? Could this be any more embarrassing?" _I thought despairingly, as I pulled my head through the dress finally, and looked down to see her thoroughly amused expression. It had been just over a week since I last saw her and I was surprised at the improvement a few short days had made. Her skin looked fresher and healthier, the bags under her eyes were almost gone, and her face, and I expected her body -though it was impossible to tell under yet another of Charlie's shirts - had filled out a little, making her look less skeletal. She was definitely improving.

"Oh. Hello, Miss...?" She joked, holding out her hand to make the introduction, and making the little ones giggle.

"Miss Newton, Dianne Newton's younger and much more attractive sister-in-law" I supplied with a straight face and her eyes sparkled with repressed laughter.

"So pleased to meet you." She said. "I came over to see what all the yelling was about. I'm refereeing a pool tournament in the other room for the older kids, and we're just between games at the moment."

"Ah, I see" I replied. "We'll try to keep it down to a dull roar in here then. The kids all giggled again, breaking out into their own roaring noises, and stalking each other around the room like lions, dress-up forgotten.

From that day, we were often at the centre at the same time. Either cooking together for "Meals on Wheels" or looking after the kids, or running the tutoring program. She came down every third day, except on the weekends and I was pleased to be able to get to know her a little better. My wolf on the other hand was just thrilled to be around her. I often had to restrain myself from burying my face in my hair and filling my lungs with her scent, as the wolf strained at the reins I had holding him back. I had tried flirting with her gently, knowing she wasn't ready yet for anything more, but she was either oblivious to it, or she realised what I was doing and was letting me down as gently as she could. I would've been concerned that she was ignoring my flirting because she had the beginnings of something going with Jake, but both Billy and Charlie had mentioned in passing how she had responded to the idea of the two of them getting together. She wasn't at all interested, and had been sensible enough to make it very clear to all parties concerned to avoid awkwardness and hurt feelings.

Bella didn't come to the Rez on the weekends though, so, to reassure Charlie, I agreed that one of the pack would keep an eye out for her at these times. On one day of the weekend, she made a point of going fishing with him. It was clear that she had little to no interest in be actual fishing - she would always bring a book to read, or some homework to do - but it was equally clear that she simply wanted to spend some time alone with her dad. Despite there being no new leech scents in the area since we chased the redhead off the hiker, I still advised Charlie to remain close to where he parked while they went fishing. He knew one of us would be watching them, and, if an emergency arose, we would be able to hold the leech back while he and Bella escaped to their vehicle and drove off.

Paul voiced his disgust at being what he referred to as 'Princess Bella's royal guard dogs' on several occasions. In a way he was right; we were responsible for protecting the whole tribe, and, since the Cullens left, forks too. Yet one of us would spend hours watching over just two people. But as far as I was concerned we owed Charlie. He had worked out our secret, and had not only promised not to tell anyone, even his own daughter, but had offered any help he might be able to provide, at any time we needed it. Paul in particular had needed it. Twice in the last three weeks, he had gotten into fights with some kids from Forks. And twice Charlie had 'made the arrest' himself, so that the paperwork could be 'lost in the system' and Paul's official police record remained clean.

Charlie understood the problems that we faced due to our tempers, and he seemed to understand Paul's personality quite well too. After chatting with Paul for a while, the second time he 'arrested' him, and understanding that a lot of his anger came from frustration, mainly frustration from failing at school no matter how hard he tried, Charlie had suggested to Paul that he go to the drop-in centre and make use of the tutoring facilities, failing to mention that Bella was one of the tutors. Despite his fury at having to be taught by 'the leech lover', and his extreme annoyance that my Alpha order forced any disrespect he might've wanted to throw in her face to remain closed inside his mouth, choking him on the words, Paul's schoolwork was improving a little, and as his schoolwork improved, so too did his temper.

It was the third weekend since Charlie confronted Billy and I about what he knew, that Jared finally caught a new scent trail from the red headed leech. Worryingly, it had started out heading down the corridor that Charlie, Billy and I had noticed when looking at the map, then suddenly veered off heading directly towards where Charlie and Bella were fishing. I had been the one watching them fish that day, and Jared had just been doing a routine patrol sweep around our territory when he picked up the trail.

_"Leech trail, Boss. Heading straight down that path you showed Paul and I."_ Jared warned me. I _knew_ I should've been more insistent about getting Paul to quit calling me Boss. Jared had fallen into the habit all too easily, and now did it without thinking when he was in wolf form.

_"Fresh, or old?" _I asked.

_"Fresh. About an hour."_

_"Follow it, but don't engage. I'll start heading to you and we'll tackle the bitch together."_ I told him, getting to my feet and beginning to carefully slink back into the cover of the deeper forest so I wouldn't be noticed by Bella who was reading under an umbrella next to Charlie.

_"Will do, Boss. She's going straight as an arrow towards town. She'll come out of the forest on Charlie's street if she keeps heading straight... No wait. The trail turns here. She veered off, going almost due west."_ I pictured the map in my mind, trying to work out where she might be going, and was alarmed to realise she was heading right for the spot where Charlie and Bella were currently sitting. It was weird. The only thing I could figure was that maybe Bella's scent was drawing her this way, looking for a tasty snack. I had discussed Bella's scent with Jared a few times, trying to work out why it had my wolf behaving like a cat after a bag of catnip. Jared confirmed that he found her scent pleasant himself, though it didn't have his wolf sitting up and begging like it did mine. Maybe her scent was just unusually pleasant to us supernatural types, and that what had distracted the red head from whatever she was after in town.

_"Fuck. She's heading right to me. Cut the corner and get your furry ass over here ASAP. Keep it quiet and stealthy once you get close though, I'll lay low and we'll try to trap her between us."_ I ordered, slinking around behind Charlie and Bella, keeping my eyes peeled for the leech. I finally saw her sitting in a tree a few hundred yards away from the Swans, watching them intently.

_"Shit. She's down wind from me. She almost certainly knows I'm here." _I told Jared, letting him see the image I could see of her perched in her tree._ "We won't be able to take her by surprise. The best we can do is chase her off again this time."_ I said, keeping my growls of frustration silent. I saw Bella roll her shoulders, looking around her as if she knew someone was watching her with malicious intent. She rubbed her arms a few times, flexing her neck back and forth.

"Dad, can you see or hear anyone else around here?" I heard her ask. "Only I feel like I'm being watched. She was perceptive. Maybe even more so than Charlie if that were possible. After all, it was her, not him that realised they were being watched. Charlie stiffened, his head shooting up and turning this way and that, looking for whoever might be watching them.

"No Bells. I don't hear or see anyone." He answered with false calm. He began reeling in his line and packing up his gear. "But if you feel uncomfortable, then we'll head back early today." He stood, reaching out to pull Bella to her feet to, and hurried them off towards her truck, ignoring her protesting.

"Shit." A quiet, musical, almost child-like voice said from the tree, and now that Charlie and Bella were climbing into the truck, I began working my way quietly towards the leech. She might've been able to smell me, but I had no intention of letting her see me until I was close enough to make a grab for her. I made sure to keep myself positioned in between the leech and the truck which was now beginning to pull out of its parking spot. The leech looked undecided. She seemed to weighing up her options; attacking a pair of humans when she knew there was a wolf right there somewhere, or forgetting about her snack and heading back to town and whatever it was that was drawing her there.

_"I'm here, Boss. I'm coming up behind her, about a hundred yards away from her now." _Jared showed me what he was seeing - the back of the leech as she dropped down from her tree.

_"Ok, Jared. Good job. Get as close as you can, as quietly as you can, and I'll do the same." _I told him._ "I don't think we'll get her this time, but it's worth trying, and if we miss her, we can still chase her off."_

_"On it."_ Jared answered, and we moved in unison, getting closer and closer, til we were each only twenty yards or so from the bitch. She gave a little smirk.

"I know you're there, wolf. I could smell your stench a mile off in pouring rain, with a stick of decongestant shoved up each nostril." Her childish voice chimed.

_"Not too clever at the witty banter this one, is she?" _Jared said, waiting patiently for my signal.

_"No. But we can't have everything, mustn't be greedy." _I said and Jared sent me a mental smirk. On my signal, we both launched ourselves at her.

She had been expecting my attack and was ready for it, dodging to one side and kicking out at me as I leapt just fractions of an inch past her. Her foot connected solidly with my ribs and I felt at least two of them crack under the assault, forcing a small whine from me.

What she _hadn't_ been expecting was Jared's simultaneous attack from the rear, and she barely escaped having her head torn from her shoulders, somehow rolling her upper body out of danger. Once again, her uncanny ability to escape had left her alive against the odds, but this time she hadn't gotten away scott free. Jared had managed to get his teeth around her hand, and when she tore it free, she left her left pinky and ring finger behind in his mouth. He spat them to the ground, where they wriggled about in the leaf mould, their ghastly white a stark contrast to the surrounding brown and green. The leech stared down at her fingers, then up to the two of us as we stalked forwards, growling. With a frustrated snarl, she spun and sped away, back away from town now, and we followed in hot pursuit.

_"Where's Paul?" _I asked Jared, hoping he was somewhere either nearby, where he could join the chase, or better yet up ahead so he could head her off.

_"Not sure." _Was the reply,_ "I think he might've had plans to go to Port Angeles today though." _Jared added hopefully. I stopped for a moment to let out a loud howl, calling Paul's attention if he was in earshot.

_"If he _is_ in Port Angeles he won't have heard that, but it looks like we're heading in that general direction, so I'll call every 10 miles or so til he does hear us." _I told Jared._ "Hopefully we've got someone in front of her without her realising it."_ I caught back up with Jared and we continued to race after the redhead, me stopping every 10 miles to let out a loud howl, until I finally felt Paul phase in just as we approached the outskirts of the city.

_"What's up, Boss?" He asked the moment he was in wolf form. "I just booked it out of the movie theatre. Its a miracle I heard you over all the gunfire." _Jared and I quickly filled him in, and he was instantly on the alert, ready to join the action._ "Excellent." _He said with a mental evil grin._ "I'll lurk around on the edge of the forest just outside the city, and you herd he straight to me. Then we can finally end the bitch." _I quickly thought his plan through.

_"Ok Paul, but whatever you do, don't let her catch sight or scent of you, or she'll veer off and be in the sea before we can get to her." _I warned him.

_"Got it, Boss"_ he answered and we saw in his mind as he carefully tucked himself under a couple of fallen branches, hidden from view. Unless the wind shifted, she never know he was there til he sprang out at her.

Jared's and I pushed our speed even harder, driving the leech into our trap.

_"We'll be right in front of you in about two minutes, Paul. Get ready."_ I warned him grimly. Finally we were going to see the last of this troublesome bitch. Up ahead, she faltered a little, slowing for just a few strides, then suddenly veering off at a right angle to her previous path. She was heading for the ocean, and Jared's and I were just too far behind to cut her off and herd her where we wanted her.

_"What the FUCK?!"_ Paul, Jared's and I said in unison. There was no way she could've seen Paul, and the wind hadn't shifted to carry his scent to her; Jared and I would've caught the scent too had that been the case. Paul tore out of his hiding place, racing after her just a few paces in front of Jared's and I. But it was too late. Reaching the cliff edge, she didn't hesitate for a second as she threw herself over the edge and into the ocean. Game over. Leeches held the advantage in the water, and there was no way we'd catch her now. The three of us skidded to a halt on the edge of the cliff, the speed of our claws digging into the ground sending a spray of grit, leaves and dirt over to be picked up and blown away by the sharp cliff wind. Standing side by side, panting, sending huge clouds of steamy breath into the air to be swept off by the wind too, the three of us watched the fiery red of her hair as it trailed on the surface of the water, the leech cutting through the waves faster than a shark.

_"How did she know?" _I wondered aloud._ "Without sight or scent of you, Paul, she still knew to veer off and head for the water." _The other two were equally baffled. There was something odd about this particular bloodsucker. It seemed that however tight we pulled the noose, she still managed to wriggle free and escape us.

_"You know, Boss, once Jacob phases we'll be in a better position." _Jared reasoned._ "Not only will we have one more of us to tighten any trap we catch her in, but we'll have the element of surprise. She'll be expecting three of us, then we can spring the fourth one from whatever direction she chooses to run." _It was a good plan, and I hoped it would work. Much as I regretted the inevitability of Jacob joining us in this difficult life, I would be glad of the extra set of paws. And when he chose to take over as Alpha, I'd be glad of the rest from the responsibility.

_"Or maybe she'll just give up now. We've never managed to rip any bits off her before. Maybe that's what will make her give up on whatever she's after." _Jared suggested, not that even _he_ believed he was right. Whatever this leech wanted, we all knew she wouldn't quit til either she got it, or we got her.

_"We'll we can but hope, I guess." _I said. "_Speaking of ripping bits off her. When we get back, one of you needs to go back and find those fingers and burn them, before someone finds them." _I told them, shuddering at the thought of them still wriggling around on the forest floor, looking for their owner.

We watched until the redhead disappeared from view, then turned as one and ran for home again, each caught up in our own thoughts. Mine were still mired in plans for when Jacob made his first phase. Every little detail was jumbling together in my brain, from how to handle and calm him when he first became a wolf, to how to handle keeping Bella away from him till it was safe. From explaining to him that he was the rightful Alpha, to the best tactics for using him in the pack to get the redhead bitch, and everything in between. My roiling thoughts were setting Paul and Jared's teeth on edge.

_"Shit, Boss. Any chance you could give it a rest? My poor tiny brain can't handle that many thoughts at once." _Paul complained._ "To be honest, I don't see how you can think all of that and keep all four legs moving in the correct sequence all at once." _Paul's light hearted bitching lifted the tense atmosphere surrounding the three of us a little and Jared's gave a snort of laughter, his tongue lolling from his mouth in a wolfy sort of smile as he ran. As it turned out, all my planning about Jacob's first phase became academic. A new wolf joined our lives as we approached the outskirts of Forks. We felt the phase, and all three of us skidded to a halt. But it wasn't Jacob's voice that echoed in our heads.

_"What the actual FUCK?" _The new voice said, just this side of complete panic. _"What's happening? Where did my hands go. Where the fuck did my hands go?"_ Whoever it was, they were fast approaching a total breakdown of control, and I quickly spoke up.

_"Calm yourself. It's ok. _You're_ ok. We're here to help."_

_"Who the fuck are you? _Where_ the fuck are you?" _The new voice asked, and we could see what he saw as he spun wildly, turning his head this way and that, trying to find where my voice was coming from and making us all dizzy.

_"I'm Sam Uley. Stop looking around for me; you won't see me, I'm several miles from you with Jared's Cameron and Paul Lahote. Look"_ I showed him our location, and turned to look at first Jared's and then Paul so he could see we were wolves like him.

_"Can you stay still where you are and look slowly around so we can see your location?" _I asked as quietly as possible, trying to infect him with my calm. It worked. He stilled, and slowly panned his head around, showing us the backs of several houses, then a distant glimpse of a boatyard.

_"The west of La Push, near Paul's house."_ Jared's spoke up, and we turned in that direction.

_"We're coming. Stay calm and quiet, and if you can do so without attracting attention, try to get into the woods there out of sight." _I told him._ "Sorry. I almost forgot. Who are you?"_

_"Embry Call."_ The new voice answered.


	19. Chapter 18: Cliffs and Concussions

**Yay! Today I hit 100 reviews, and I'm pleased to say they've all been positive. Thank you all so much. Keep them coming. :0)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 18: Cliffs and Concussions

Bella POV

Seen by itself, the phone call was really nothing. An innocent call from one friend to another. No hidden agenda, no deliberate intent to create chaos and mayhem in my life. But had I known that that innocent little call was going to be the catalyst for the most dramatic change my life had seen to date, (and bearing in mind the huge changes my life had faced so far, that was really saying something) I might not have picked up.

It wasn't quite 10am when the phone rang that Sunday. I'd been out fishing with Charlie the day before, and so my plans for the day mainly revolved around housework. I was shoving a load into the washer when I heard the house phone ringing, so I hurried into the kitchen to listen to the machine as it picked up the call. Charlie and I had started this screening process a few days after the 'Mrs Newton gossip incident' as Charlie and I referred to it. We had both grown tired of answering the phone at all hours, only to find it was yet another brainless idiot, desperate to either spread a new piece of gossip, or to express their disgust at whatever new lie they'd heard about me. So we began letting the machine pick up the calls. If it was important, we would call whoever it was straight back. If it was a friend, they knew why we were screening our calls through the machine, so they'd just say who it was, hang up and call back straight away, in which case Charlie or I would answer.

The machine clicked on just as I got into the kitchen.

"Bells. It's Jake." He hung straight up, and less than five seconds later, the phone rang again. This time. Grabbed it before the machine could.

"Hey Jake. How's it going?" I asked, going to the sink and filling the kettle.

"Great. Better than great. In fact I'd say awesome." He said in an excited voice. I was instantly intrigued.

"Awesome because...?" I prompted him. Luckily, he wasn't the sort who believed that drawing out the suspense was fun, and he got right to the point

"They're done. The bikes are finished."

I was instantly excited and terrified._ "Am I ready to make this change? To become the sort of person who takes risks, even if they're carefully controlled ones?"_ I had been asking myself this same question ever since I first saw the bikes sitting on that lawn, waiting for someone to come and take them. For the first time I realised I had _already_ made that change. I had begun making it on that same day. I made it when I walked out on Mrs Newton and her money grabbing, gossiping ways. I made it when I collected the bikes. I made it when I stood up to the horrible gossiping women in the supermarket, and when I sat in my hollow searching for calm, and when I played poker with Jacob, Quil, and Embry. The change was already made in tiny increments over the last few weeks, and it was too late now to sit back and worry that it might not be the right change, or that I might not like what it led to.

"I'll be right over." I said, and hung up. I grabbed my purple D.M.s and yanked them on, leaving the laces untied and tripping over them three times before I even got to the front door. Picking up the Forks PD hoodie which I'd permanently commandeered from Charlie's closet, I jogged/tripped out to my truck and clambered in, failing several times to get the seatbelt clip actually done up before I finally raced off to the Rez as fast as my geriatric truck could take me. Now I had accepted that I'd made the change, I was anxious to get on with it. I drove by muscle memory, not at all aware of the journey itself as I was thinking over all the differences in my life that I'd barely given any notice to before.

First there were the physical changes. I had put on around eight to ten pounds, and while Charlie thought I could still bear to gain a little more, I was relatively happy switch my current weight. I wasn't consciously trying to gain any more, but with a normal diet and lifestyle, it would just settle at whatever it was intended to be. Being out of doors so much now was improving my skin, making it less dry and _slightly_ less pale.

Almost more satisfying to both Charlie and I than the rest though, was the fact that the bags under my eyes were all but gone now. My 'Alone in the Forest' dreams had begun to lessen. I still had them most nights, but they were shorter and less excruciating, the silent observer which had just added more tension to the dream the first time I noted it, now served to lessen the loneliness of the dream itself. I no longer felt the watcher was completely disinterested in my fate, merely curious as to what I would do to save myself from it, and knowing that I wasn't completely alone made the dream more bearable. As for my dream scenes which repeated night after night, well they too had decreased a little, leaving me with only the occasional replay of the 'Victoria attacks the village' scene, and nightly repeats of the kinky sex scene, and while that one was irritating as I was always jolted awake every night as the dream ended, the dream itself was so _hot_ that a part of me was glad I continued to have it. If only I wasn't joined by Taha Aki every night it would've been great. But there the old man was, every night, telling me to "watch", which I was going to do anyway, but would rather do so without worrying he was too. The dream had altered somewhat, the sweaty writhing couple and I were still alone in the room apart from the big black wolf in the corner, oh and the old man, who now snorted in amused irritation and turned around in a way I could only describe as sarcastically indulgent before I could even ask him to each night. However one night Taha Aki had stood by a window that had never been there before and pointed outside, telling me to "look", and when I did, I saw outside a silver wolf and a brown wolf lying down and staring into the forest, then a dark grey wolf with black spots on his coat walked out of the forest and joined them. From that night, even when Taha Aki didn't get me to look out the window, I always knew they were out there, guarding the naked sweaty me who was moaning and panting with lust and passion inside with the huge man, who as the days went by and my crush on Sam grew, looked more and more like Sam himself, from whatever might be heading my way. _"Stupid subconscious. Showing me what I can't have, and am still undecided about whether or not I should even be wanting."_

As often as I returned to think about this dream, and the 'Victoria attacks the village' dream too, I still couldn't reconcile one very important fact. I knew that the shape shifters were extinct. Carlisle had told me so, and he aught to know - he had met the last few to exist. With them being extinct, I couldn't understand Taha Aki's insistence that I "watch" these scenes over and over. An extinct species wouldn't be able to help me, and no amount of wishful thinking was going to change that.

The mental an emotional changes were, of course, less noticeable to those who didn't know me well. But to those that did, they were probably more startling than the physical. I was surprised myself at how well I'd managed to fortify that door that led into the room where my pit lay, still open and not forgotten, but deliberately avoided. My time in the hollow had done much of the work there. As I drifted inside my own mind I was able to distance myself from the memories enough that thinking of the Cullens caused me no pain, and I was even able to hope that one day I would think of them freely whenever I wanted with love and affection, and without the pain the memories had brought me before. I wasn't quite there yet, but maybe one day. I still avoided thoughts of _Him_, even when in my hollow, but I was letting the ties my heart still maintained loosen and weaken, allowing my crush on Sam to help pick at the threads, although I wasn't sure how sensible that was. The crush wasn't likely to lead to anything. He wasn't interested, and even if he was, nothing serious could come of it as I would have to leave one way or another once Victoria showed up to take her revenge.

I arrived at Jake's about twenty minutes later, completely unaware of a single moment of the drive there. I honestly thought a child could've run out in front of my truck and I would've just run straight over them without even noticing, I had been so distracted while driving. I couldn't allow that to happen again. A little controlled danger like riding my newly repaired motorcycle was one thing, but driving around whilst my head was elsewhere was quite another. Far too dangerous. For others as well as myself.

Jake came out to meet me, far too full of anticipation to wait for me to leave my truck and go knock on his door.

"Come on, Bells. Hurry up. Come and see!" He was bouncing up and down on his toes like a four year old eager to show his parent his latest Lego creation, it was sweet, but rather weird to see this huge man-child behaving like a toddler.

"Ok, ok, I'm coming. Calm down." I said as he pulled out of the truck and off towards his workshop. The bikes looked great. Well to be honest they looked like two rusty pieces of crap, but they were _working_ rusty pieces of crap, and that was the important point here. Jake switched on each one and turned the engines over to show me that they were indeed running and then went over the basics of how to ride them. Before long, my mind was over-run with information about clutches, brakes, gears and gas, and I just hoped I'd be ablew to keep it all straight once I was actually riding mine.

"So are we going to take them out now?" I asked him, eager to get started.

"Yeah. I checked with charlie a few days ago when I knew I was nearly done and he agreed I counted as someone who knew what they were doing enough to teach you." Jake told me. "You told me you promised him, so I thought I'd best check." I was glad he had. I'd completely forgotten about it in my excitement, and I would've felt dreadful when I remembered.

"Well then let's go." I said, pushing my bike out of the workshop and over to the truck. jake followed behind and lifted them both into the back, making it look even easier then when he lowered them down a few weeks ago, if that's possible, and we headed out.

"So where are we going then?" I asked him as we reached the end of the road.

"Go left here, then we need to get over to the other side of La Push. There's an old loggers track over there that's fairly level, and open, so well be able to ride up and down over there safely." I followed his directions as he gave them, and ten minutes later we were driving along the coast road overlooking the cliffs. As I always did when I drove on this road, I glanced over to catch the view, taking in the impressive waves crashing against the cliffs, and the half naked man that was falling over the edge into the water. Wait.

I slammed on the brakes, throwing Jake and I forward in the cab, and jumped out of the truck yelling

"NO! Oh my God! Oh fuck no. Jake. Someone just fell. I saw him hit the water. We need to call the coast guard and an ambulance. Shit, shit, shit. Where's my phone?" I looked desperately over to Jake for my cell, and was astonished and more than a little disgusted to see him still sitting relaxed in the truck, laughing.

"What the fuck, Jake. It's no joke. I saw someone fall from the cliff. Pass me my phone. NOW" He laughed again.

"Relax, Bells, calm down. He didn't fall. He jumped."

"As if that makes any difference!" I yelled at him. "He'll be just as injured either way. We need to get him some help."

"No, I mean he cliff jumped. You know, for fun? It's something we do around here when the tourists aren't around to try and join in. See look" he pointed back over to the cliffs "there goes another one." My eyes followed his finger all the way up to the top of the cliffs, and there, throwing himself from the edge, was another half naked guy. We watched as he fell, turning a summersault, down, down, down, until he finally straightened into a dive just before he hit the water. Up above, one of the two left on the cliff slapped the other on the back and walked back into the trees, obviously not taking his turn but leaving instead.

"Most of jump from a little lower down, but not those show offs. Sam and his gang just have to do _everything_ one better than everyone else." His tone was bitter and angry. Knowing how he, Quil and Embry all felt about Sam and his friends, I had given up arguing about it with them. We agreed to disagree, and from then on avoided the subject as much as possible. But this time Jake had real animosity in his tone and I wondered what had changed to cause it.

"Have they done something to piss you off, Jake? Only I hear more than your usual dislike there."

"Of course not." He answered, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "Sam, Jared, and Paul, and their new little buddy Embry can do what they want. It's no skin off my nose." He hit the dashboard angrily.

"Embry? That's Embry up there with them? What the hell? I thought he was still sick." I said, troubled by what I was hearing.

"He came back to school two days ago." Jake told me. "He was completely freaked out, but refused to ell Quil or I why. Then he hung out with Paul and Jared at lunch, and left with them after school both days, and he won't answer any of our calls. He gets his mom to tell us he's out." He went on, that bitter anger back in his voice. "Looks like Sam's got himself another disciple." I couldn't understand what had happened. Embry had disliked Sam and his friends just as much as Jake and Quil had. But here he was hanging out and messing around with them, suddenly their best buddy, and cutting his two friends who he loved like brothers completely dead. _"Probably me too."_ I thought. "_I'd be easier to give up than the others as he's not known me as long."_ A deep sadness hit me at the loss of Embry as a friend, and I truly felt for Jake and Quil. If _I_ felt this bad, how must _they_ feel?

"You want me to see if I can get him to talk to me? Or ask Sam what's going on?" I offered, climbing back into the truck and giving him a one armed hug across the bench seat. Jake forced a smile.

"Nah. It's not gonna do anyone any good for you to get stuck in the middle, Bells. Neither one of them would give you a straight answer anyway, so you should just leave it. If Embry's any kind of a friend, he'll come explain himself before long." I hoped he was right. He squeezed my hand again and gave me a more natural smile. "Come on now. I don't want today's adventure ruined by all this shit. Lets go ride some two wheeled death machines." I laughed at his description. That's what Charlie called the bikes whenever we discussed them with him. I pulled the truck back onto the road from the lay by where I'd skidded to a halt, and after a few more turns we were at the old logger's trail.

After giving me a recap on everything he'd shown me back at the workshop, I climbed into my bike and kick started it. It took me four tries, but I managed to do it by myself.

"Ok now, Bells. Slow and steady. Keep your feet out to start with, so you can catch yourself if you need to, and give it just a little gas as you slowly release the clutch" he coached me, and I did as he said, the bike gently moving off. Jake jogged along next to me for a few hundred yards until I'd picked up a bit more speed. Growing more confident, I gave the bike a little more gas, and gradually got faster and faster. It wasn't until I was reaching the turn that I realised I was going too fast to make it, and I slammed my right foot on the rear brake, figuring it would be safer, so I wouldn't fly over the handlebars. Unfortunately I was wrong. What actually happened was the rear tyre locked up and I went into a huge skid, finally tumbling from the bike and narrowly avoiding having it fall on top of me. I continued to skid along the floor without the bike, the wet mud slowing me a little, and it was probably this that prevented me from a much worse injury when I finally stopped by smashing head first into a tree stump.

In cartoons, when a character hits their head, they often see stars or little tweeting birds flying around their head. I'd had enough knocks to my head over to the years to know that this is actually not far from the truth. Well the stars part anyway. On this occasion though, it wasn't stars I could see, but flashes of red, fading in and out, almost as if it was dodging between the trees. It looked like fire, jumping from branch to branch, and I watched it, mesmerised, as I dimly registered the sound of another motorcycle approaching. I finally managed to drag my attention from the red flames, and turned my head to see Jake skidding to halt near me and jumping off his bike. I wished I hadn't turned my head immediately. The pain instantly flared, and I felt nauseous, my eyes were proving difficult to focus too. My mind kept attempting to wander off, refusing to concentrate on anything for more than a few seconds at a time. _Q_

"Bells? Bella? BELLA?! Are you ok? Did you hit your head? Can you move everything?" He sounded irate, so I gave him a reassuring smile. Or I tried to. I suspected it had come across more as a lazy grin. He began patting down my limbs, running his hands over my legs, looking for injuries.

"Heeeey Jakey." I grinned. "Watcha doooin'?" My voice sounded slow and slurred, like when an old tape player ran out of batteries.

"Just checking you've not broken anything, Bells. Relax. I'm not getting fresh or anything." He gave me a little smile. "You hit your head?"

"Yup." I grinned again. "Haaaard."

"BELLA! You ok? Is she ok? Bella?" I hadn't known Jake could throw his voice like that. It was coming from a few yards behind him.

"That's clever." I slurred. "Do it again." Jake shot me a confused look, then turned to look at something behind him. When he turned back to me he looked more pissed than he had before. Sam's face suddenly floated behind Jake's.

"Bella! Are you ok?" It said.

"No, no, noooo. That's not how you do it. Get Jake to show you how. He can say it without his lips moving." I told Sam's face. "I can see your lips moving. They're pretty. You've got a pretty mouth, Sam's face. It's a shame the rest of you isn't here. I like looking at your cheese grater." I continued, still slurring my words. "No. Wait. I don't mean cheese grater. Hey! Did you see the pretty fire in the trees?" The face, which had been smirking a little at the beginning of my little speech clouded over with worry, and it turned to look at the trees, seeming to almost sniff at the air. Maybe he was trying to smell the smoke. Fire makes smoke. Yeah that must be it.

"She must've hit her head pretty hard." Sam's face told Jake. "We'd better get her to the clinic. My truck's right on the bend there. If I carry her to it, can you ride your bike back to her truck and drive it to meet us there? We can pick her bike up later." Jake looked like he wanted to object, but couldn't think of a good reason. His jaw tensed.

"Fine. But you be careful with her. I'll only be a few minutes behind you. He warned. "Bell's. Sam's gonna drive you to the clinic. I'll meet you there, ok?"

"Silly Jakey. A face can't drive. Sam's face should've brought the rest of him. It's got arms. They're very muscly. They could help." I suggested helpfully. "Also you could grate abs on his cheese. No. That's not right either. Cheese on his abs. That's it. You could cheese abs on his grates." I stated authoritatively. Jake rolled his eyes at me and stood up. The rest of Sam came into view. "Hey, there's the rest of him now." My slurring was getting worse, and I was growing sleepy. My eyelids started to droop. "Now his arms are here, he can drive." I felt Sam pick me up. My head was throbbing badly and I was feeling more and more like I would puke, but the strong, hot arms that lifted me and pulled me into a strong, hot body settled my stomach a little. A musky, woodsy scent filled my nose. It reminded me a little of my steamy, sweaty, naked dream scene, and for a wild moment I wondered if Taha Aki was watching, and about to pop out and tell me to "watch". I forced my eyes open again. "Taha Aki's seen your butt." I told the rest of Sam. "But it's ok, cos you smell good." His footsteps faltered for a moment, like he'd tripped, then settled into a slightly faster rhythm. I nuzzled my face into the crook of his neck and let my eyes drift shut. I was so very tired.

"So do you, Bella, so do you." Sam's face said so quietly I wasn't sure if I'd imagined it. I was falling asleep, barely aware of being quickly, but gently put into a vehicle. "Stay awake now. Keep those pretty eyes open for me, Bella." We'll be at the clinic in just a few minutes." I tried hard to do as I was asked. It was hard though. It felt like weights were attached to my eyelids. I fought hard against the seeping blackness, even though it was very tempting to let its velvety darkness envelope me in lovely, lovely sleep. I was being carried again. I breathed in the wonderful woodsy scent, and once again, the urge to puke receded.

"We're here. Stay awake now. No sleeping." Sam's voice cut through the velvet like a pair of gleaming silver fabric scissors. I once again forced my eyes open, wincing at the pain in my head as the bright lights of the clinic.

A lady was shining a tiny flashlight in my eyes. "Hello, Bella. I'm Sue Clearwater." She told me, switching the flashlight from one eye to the other, then back again.

"Can I go to sleep now please?" I asked her. "I just want a little sleep"

"In a little while. First I need to check you over and take a couple of X-rays. But once I'm done, you can sleep."

The X-rays only took about ten minutes, and after Sue and some guy in a white coat and looked at them, mumbling and gesticulating between themselves, then finally. Finally. I was allowed to sink into the cozy warm, velvety sleep. Just as I drifted off it occurred to me. _"Sam never let goff my hand once."_


	20. Chapter 19: Dates and Death

**It's been a slow building story so far; I didn't want to rush Bella straight into something she wasn't ready for. But from here on out, things are getting exciting. Let me know if I'm picking the pace up too quickly? Too much, too fast at this point would ruin the atmosphere I've been trying to build up. **

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

* * *

Chapter 19: Dates and Death

The staff at the clinic woke me every hour and re-checked my vitals, with me getting crankier and crankier every time. I'm not sure when he arrived, but the first time they shook me awake, Charlie was sitting next to my bed.

"Dad?" I was feeling very groggy, and most of me wanted to just go straight back to sleep, but a small part of me knew I needed to reassure him that I was ok. I looked at him around the nurse who was taking my blood pressure. "Guess I need to work on actually _steering_ the bike next time, huh?" I joked feebly.

"Next time?" Charlie asked with a mixture of amusement and anger on his face. "I'm tempted to tell you that the bike can just rust away where it fell, and you're already talking about next time?" I was fighting against my eyes closing once again.

"Too tired to fight right now." I told him. "Later." I drifted back off

"Sure, kid. Later it is." I heard him reply as sleep pulled me under once more. Th next time I was woken Jake had replaced Charlie by my bed, and he was glaring daggers at someone by the door. I painfully turned my head to see who was there, and was unsurprised to find it was Sam, leaning casually against the wall and completely ignoring the daggers Jake was sending his way with his eyes. I turned my head slowly back, wincing as the nurse shone her little flashlight into each eye in turn.

"Jake." I called, dragging his attention away from Sam. "Is my bike ok?" He rolled his eyes.

"I don't know, Bells, I was kinda more concerned about you and the dent you made in your head than the bike." Sam snorted from his place by the door, and Jake continued. "You should've seen yourself. Your eyes were all wonky and you were talking complete shit." He grinned a little. "If that's how you are when you're concussed, I shudder to think what you might be like drunk." I opened my mouth to protest, but the nurse interrupted me.

"She needs her rest, boys. Best to let her sleep now. We're going to have to keep waking her every hour as it is." Sam pushed himself off the wall and walked over to my bed.

"I'm glad to see you're doing a little better. You get some rest and I'll come see you tomorrow, if that's ok?" I nodded at him sleepily and he left, leaving Jake to say his own goodbye.

"Looks like you'll be out of here by the afternoon if you get the all clear from the doc in the morning." He told me. "Charlie's gonna stay with you tonight - he's switched shifts with one of his deputies and is planning on working tomorrow instead - so I guess I'll head home now. I'm taking your truck, and I'll bring it back tomorrow afternoon, to pick you up and bring you home, ok?" I was already falling back asleep, and mumbled a barely audible

"Ok" back. I was just aware of him leaving the room, and Charlie coming back in before I was gone again. At each awakening during the night, Charlie was right there, in the uncomfortable looking plastic chair by my bed. One time, he was sleeping, his head resting against my feet, but every other time, he was watching over me, anxiously looking to the nurse to confirm that I was ok for another hour.

It was an incredibly long and frustrating night. Every single hour, on the hour, I was woken by a nurse, asked stupid questions about the date, my name, and where I was - questions which I was positive that even a person who'd had no head injury at all would struggle to answer sensibly after being deprived of sleep so efficiently - was poked and prodded, and had a light shone in my eyes, and then, just when I'd settled back down to sleep, the whole process would repeat again. By the time the doctor came around at nine the next morning, I was a cranky, frustrated, bewildered mess. Poor Charlie wasn't much better, and, as he had to go into the station to work that afternoon, I had urged him to go home and get a few hours sleep before he had to start his shift. The doctor had declared me out of any danger of slipping into a coma in my sleep, and confirmed that I could be discharged that afternoon, so, once Charlie had headed off to get some sleep, I lay back down to do the same, finally, blissfully undisturbed.

The dream felt like it began instantly. Like it had been pressing to jump forward all night, unable to actually flower in my brain due to my constant waking. Now I was soundly asleep, it roared into the forefront, shouting for my attention.

Taha Aki actually appeared relieved an impatient when the scene started. For the first time, he grabbed my upper arm and turned me towards what he wanted to see.

"Watch." It was his usual, stunningly witty turn of phrase, but more demanding, urgent even.

"Okay, okay, I'm watching" I grumbled, still, even now I was actually asleep, grumpy from my disturbed night. As I watched, Victoria attacked the village, just like she always did, only this time I was watching the beginning of the attack, as she raced into the village, speeding between the buildings so fast that I barely caught sight of her at all, sometimes only seeing her blaze of red hair flying behind her. No matter how fast she moved, amidst the screams and death, that fiery red would always catch my eye, like she was carrying a flaming torch everywhere she went. Nothing more happened in my dream this time. I didn't have to once again witness me/not me either stab myself in the heart or slash at my own chest. I didn't watch Taha Aki turn into a wolf and attack Victoria, it was just a constant loop of flashes of flame red hair flitting from place to place in the village, leaving a trail of death and destruction in her wake.

After what seemed like hours of the same horror, Taha Aki finally relented, letting go of my arm, and turning to me with a more gentle expression.

"Rest now." He told me as the background faded away into black nothingness, and I accepted the command gratefully, feeling the alertness I usually felt in those dreams fading along with the background. Withe the last of my awareness before I drifted into more mundane, restful sleep, a thought popped into my mind. _"When exactly did I start thinking of Taha Aki as a separate entity, and not just another character my subconscious mind created to get the message across to my conscious mind?"_ It was too late to contemplate it; my mind slipped away, and real sleep flowed over me like an avalanche.

I was woken at about one by Sam coming in with my lunch.

"Hey there, Bella. How're you doing now?" He asked, setting the tray down on the little hospital table by my bed. "I just intercepted the nurse bringing this in for you."

"A little better, just tired." I sat up, blearily wiping the hair back from my face with an internal grimace _"Awesome. I'm sure I look just _great_ right now._" As the smell of the food reached me, my stomach began making alarmingly loud noises, unsurprisingly, I guessed, bearing in mind I'd not eaten anything since breakfast the day before. As I blushed he chuckled.

"Well that answers my next question; I was going to ask if you were hungry." My blush grew deeper.

"Well I guess I could manage something." I tried for a casual tone and failed. He pushed the little table over my bed, and I tucked a pillow behind me to stop myself from falling backwards. I started tucking into my lunch, not even the fact that it was standard revolting hospital fare putting a dent in my appetite.

"So," he began, sitting on the end of my bed, "you were saying some... Interesting stuff yesterday. Can you remember any of it?" I paused in my chewing to cast my mind back, starting from when my bike skidded out from under me. The memories were hazy; something about the trees being on fire tickled in my brain, reminding me also of the dream scene I'd just had. Mentally shrugging off that thought, putting a pin in it for later. "_What else did I say?" _I wondered._ "I remember something about Sam's face and his mouth being pretty. Oh shit. And his body being all muscly and his abs being used as a cheese grater. Please, please, PLEASE let me have not said anything about that." _Even the thought of it had me blushing again. I looked up at him cautiously, and his smirk killed any tiny hope I might've had that my big fat, stupid mouth hadn't blabbed everything I had thought while concussed.

"Oh shit." I hung my head in defeat. "Can I plead temporary insanity? You can't hold what a girl says when her brain's all jellied against her, right?" He laughed out loud, throwing his head back, once again making me think _"beautiful"_

"I guess if you put it like that I'll have to cut you some slack this time." He said to my relief, "though that'll make three you owe me" he added, and I swallowed, wondering just when he was planning on collecting these I.O.U.s and _what exactly_ I was going to have to do to pay him back. A few helpful suggestions in the form of snapshots from my steamy dream scene flashed through my head, and I sternly forced them back. _"Not like he'd be interested"_ I reminded myself. I hoped he'd assume the extra blush that came to my face right then was just due to me remembering the things I'd said the previous day.

"There _was_ something else you said though, that I'm curious about." He went on, leaning forward a little. I was filled with dread. _"Oh shit. What else did I say? Did I proposition him or something? Tell him that he fucks me roughly from behind every night in my dreams? What?"_ I was scanning through what I might've said in panic.

"Y-yes? What was that then?" I asked, getting ready to fall into a terminal shame spiral.

"You talked about someone called Taha Aki. I was wondering where you'd heard the name?" Relief flooded my body. _"Oh is that all? Jeeze. I'm glad I didn't try to guess out loud what I'd said, or I'd be busy sinking through the floor right about now!"_ I laughed a little shrilly in my relief and said

"Oh that? It just a name I think I probably read in a book. I had this dream where he was talking to me." I told him, avoiding the fact that it want just one dream, one time, but was every night, and and that I was beginning to get the feeling he wasn't just a product of my subconscious mind. He looked troubled. He seemed to mumble something like

"Well _that's_ not possible" under his breath, but it was so quiet I couldn't be sure, so I let it go. He cleared his throat and looked out the window.

"I hear Jake's coming by to pick you up once he's out of school." He said. "Ae you going to stop and pick up your bike on the way home, or did you need me to go do it?"

"No that's fine, thanks." I said, picking up my fork again. "We'll do it in the way." It was a kind offer, but I didn't want to owe him anymore; he'd already done so much to help me.

"Ok then. There's just the issue of these favour you owe me then." He said with a little smirk. "I'd like to cash one of those in now, if I could." I grew a little concerned. I'd known the I.O.U.s would've come back to bite me in the ass, I just hadn't thought it'd happen so quick.

"Oookaaay" I said guardedly, dragging the word out a little. "So what exactly is it you want?"

"A date." He said without hesitation. I was confused. Thinking I'd mis-heard him, I double checked.

"A date?" I asked. "Like a dinner and movie, going out together, picking me up from my house kind of date?"

"No, a fruit from a palm tree." He rolled his eyes with a grin. "Of _course_ a going out together kind of date. So what do you say? Wednesday night? I know it's a school night, but they're showing a few old classics at the movie theatre in Port Angeles Wednesday night. We won't be late, I promise." My confusion grew. _"What the hell would he want to go on a date with _me_ for?"_ I wondered. My mouth must've been hanging open in my shock, as he reached out and gently pushed it closed with a couple of fingers.

"I ... Um ... So ..." I was completely at a loss for words. His face grew worried.

"It's ok, Bella. If you're really not interested, that's fine. We'll just forget I said anything about it." He said in a rush, standing up and turning towards the door.

"NO!" I almost yelled at the look of shock on his face, I lowered my voice. "I mean no, it's fine. Wednesday's fine. If you'd like. Um ... What time?" He looked almost as relieved as I must've done when I discovered I hadn't propositioned him in my confused, concussed state.

"Four thirty sound ok?" He asked. "We can eat after the movie and I can have you back home by ten thirty or eleven at the latest."

"O-ok" I stammered. "Four thirty on Wednesday then." He grinned at me.

"Good." He turned for the door once again. "I'd better be going. I've got several jobs on at the moment, so I should get back to them or I'll never get paid." His hand was on the door knob, just beginning to turn it when he seemed to think of something. He quickly strode back over to me and bent down, his face coming level to mine. For a moment I thought he was just going to whisper something to me, but instead he placed a warm, gentle kiss on my cheek, lingering for just a few seconds before pulling back with a small smile.

"Til Wednesday. Bye Bella." He said in a low voice, and I couldn't do anything but nod dumbly back, my voice had taken a vacation without warning. He walked back to the door and this time left through it, leaving me sitting dumbfounded on the bed, one hand loosely holding the fork, which was dripping pasta sauce on the bed, while the other and had raised by itself to press against my cheek, where the feel of his kiss still lingered, a pleasant sort of tingling on the skin.

* * *

By the time Jake arrived to pick me up I'd managed to collect my wits which had apparently dribbled out of my ears while Sam was visiting and I was dressed and ready to leave the moment he came in.

"Someone's eager to get out of here." He joked and I gave him a tight, weary smile.

"Yeah, well you'd be pretty eager to get out of somewhere that inflicted sleep deprivation torture on you too." I told him, pulling him along behind me towards the exit - or trying to, he was just far too big for me to actually manage to shift him. I breathed a sigh of relief when we finally hit open air; I'd been more than half afraid the doctor would suddenly change his mind and insist on keeping me in for another night. A walked over to my truck, and Jake handed me the keys, walking around to the passenger side. As we pulled away, him giving me directions to take us back to the loggers trail I asked him

"Did Charlie give you any grief about my accident?" He grimaced a little.

"He was starting to, but Sam interrupted him and told him exactly what had happened. Apparently he'd seen the whole thing. He made it clear it was neither of our faults, so I'm not in trouble, and I'm pretty sure Charlie will give in and let you ride your bike again, though I'm almost positive he'll make you wear a helmet from now on." He told me. "Actually, it's something I should've thought of yesterday."

"Ok. So neither of us is in trouble, and I can probably still ride my bike. So why the grimace?" I asked him.

"Why did it have to be _Sam_ that fixed it all for us?" He asked bitterly. "I hate the thought that I owe that dick anything. And, while I'm thinking about it, why _was_ he there anyway. He saw the whole thing, but what was he doing there so that he could see it? Stalk me much?" He said, scowling out the window as we drove along. "Whenever I see him, I catch him looking at me. It's weird. No. It's more than weird. It's fucking _creepy_. He looks at me like he's expecting me to do something any minute. I wish I knew what. I'd do it straight away just to get him to leave me the fuck alone." I didn't know quite how to respond to this little rant of his. I had a feeling that now wasn't the most opportune moment to mention the date I'd agreed to go on with Sam, so I kept it to myself. The whole date thing might go really badly and never be repeated. No need to get Jake all wound up over a possible nothing. I'd tell him after the date, _if_ it looked like there might be a second one.

We turned up the loggers trail and I drove on past where I'd parked the day before, bumping along the track until we got to the turn I'd failed to make on my bike. There it lay in the mud, still where it had fallen, a trench dug into the ground, made by the handlebars as it had skidded along. And there, about five feet away was the large tree stump where I'd hit my head. I stopped the truck, climbing out and walking over to my bike. Jake followed, bending to haul it up out if the mud for me. He put it on it's stand.

"I'll just go pull the tarp back so we can load the bike onto the truck" he told me, squeezing my shoulder gently as he walked by me. I just nodded and stared into the forest, trying to itch the scratch that had just started in the back of my mind. Something was sitting right there in my mind, just begging to come forward, but here, in the freezing drizzle, standing in the middle of a muddy track by the forest wasn't the time to try and pry it out. I went to grab the bike by the handlebars, intending to push it over towards the truck, when something caught my eye. A piece of pink paper, damp from the usual rainy weather, was wedged, tightly folded, under the worn, cracked leather of the bike seat. I pried it out, curious. Opening it up, I caught my name written in neat but flowery writing at the top. It was a letter. For me.

_"Dearest Bella," it read. _

_"You can hide in your dogs' kennel as much as you want, but it will only delay the inevitable. I've been patient, but now I'm going to have to press the issue. What you took from me can never be replaced, but then that's not why I'm here, is it?_

_A mate for a mate, that's how it goes. Yours killed mine, now I'm going to return the favour. You should know, I'm not at all fussy about who else gets taken out in the process. That father of yours seems like such a good man. It'd be a shame to deprive the town of such an upstanding member of their community, wouldn't it? A dutiful daughter would see to it that he was kept out of danger. _

_It's time to face facts, dearest Bella. You're a danger to everyone around you, because I'll keep coming, over and over until I get what I want. No guard dogs can hold me off forever. _

_I've never really been one for melodrama, but on this occasion the turn of phrase is so deliciously apt, I can't resist. _

_'I'll get you, my pretty. And your little dogs too'_

_Victoria"_

I was a statue. Every muscle locked in place, my brain wildly casting about, searching for what to do.

Nothing.

I had nothing.

My head felt empty, like a harsh wind had howled through, scouring all thought away with it.

The pink paper was crumpled in my fist. I was dimly aware of Jake wheeling my bike back to the truck, and still I stood there, frozen.

Some distant part of me noted his return, him grabbing my shoulder, calling me, yelling for my attention, and still I stood there, frozen.

I felt myself lifted up, carried to the truck, placed inside, but I couldn't kick start my brain to do more than absently note these facts.

Slowly, painfully slowly, a tiny part of awareness seeped back in to register Jake's panicked voice.

"Shit, fuck, what should I do? Bella _please. _What do I need to do? Should I take you back to the clinic?" Somehow my head managed to shake no.

"Should I take you home?" My head, once again acting on it's own nodded and, seemingly relieved at getting _some _response and some form of direction, Jake turned the truck around on the trail and tore out of there.

Without knowing how, still trapped in my frozen body and mind, I found myself being carried inside my house and placed on the couch. The door to the room holding my pit was rattling on it hinges, flying open, the pit was screaming my name, at he same time both terrifying and comforting to me. With the last of my awareness I noted Jake again yelling for my attention.

"Should I call Charlie? Bella? BELLA? What should I do? I'm gonna call Charlie."

Charlie.

_Charlie. _

I had to keep him safe. Letting my pit swallow me again would kill him in two ways. First emotionally, then physically, when Victoria came. Like a rope thrown for a drowning person, I grabbed hold of his name, and pulled myself away from the pit, out of the room, slamming the door shut behind me. I had promised. I had _promised _him I wouldn't do this again. I wouldn't, I _couldn't _let his last memories of me be poisoned by seeing me back in a zombie state. A the door slammed behind me, I forced my body to move. I reached out and grabbed Jake's wrist before he could pick up the phone.

"No, Jake. Don't call him." My voice sounded weird to me; calm and quiet, no sign of the total meltdown currently going on inside. "It was just the exhaustion from yesterday and last night catching up with me. All he'd do is worry, and there's no need for that when a little more sleep will fix it."

"I don't know, Bells. You sure?" He didn't sound convinced. "That was fucking scary. It was like before, you know, you were just ... _gone_."

I had to up my game, convince him. I forced a wan smile on my face, sent the necessary signals to make my frozen hand lift and drag through my hair, then rub across my face in a tired gesture.

"Yeah, I'm sure, Jake. It's nothing that sleep won't fix. Why bother him when all he'd be able to do is sit and watch me dream?" His face grew a little more relaxed.

"So do you need me to help you to your room?" He asked, and I shook my head.

"No. Thanks, Jake, but I'm gonna grab myself a shower, then head straight to bed. I'm sorry I freaked you out." He gave me a small smile.

"So you should be, Bells. Don't pull that shit on me again. I just about crapped my pants when I couldn't get a response out of you." He headed to the door. You mind if I ride your bike back to the Rez? It needs a quick going over anyway in the workshop, to make sure it's not damaged from your fall." I shook my head once again and he gave me a quick grin.

"Cool." He said "I'll give you a call tomorrow to see how you're doing. Think you'll go to school?" I shrugged. I was reaching the last of my reserves and I needed him out of there before I broke completely.

"Ok. Well I'll call you anyway, like I said. Get some sleep, Bella. You look dead on your feet." He left, closing the door quietly behind him. _"_ _I _am _dead. And there's nothing I, or anyone else can do about it." _I thought. I sank to my knees, the crumpled pink paper I'd been holding in my fist falling to the floor. My eyes, staring at the screwed up ball, filled with tear, blurring everything into unrecognisable watery shapes. I was dead. My body just hadn't accepted the inevitable yet. She was coming, and I was dead.


	21. Chapter 20: Answers and Acceptance

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit**

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Chapter 20: Answers and Acceptance

I had been kneeling there on the kitchen floor for maybe half an hour when the phone ringing startled me out of my stupor a little. The machine clicked on and I heard Angela leaving a message, asking if I was feeling any better, and if I'd be at school the next day. I made myself focus on her voice, the mundane thought of school making a useful first step away from my melt down. Just like I had before, the last time I'd been overwhelmed by events, I broke things down into small tasks to be accomplished, rather than trying to make myself absorb the whole impossibly large picture in one go. _"Ok then." _I told myself_. "Step one: get up off the floor and put together something easy for dinner later."_ I didn't let myself look any further ahead than this small step for now, knowing it was best to ease myself slowly back into action, so I put my whole attention firmly on the contents of the fridge, choosing ingredients to make a simple stew that could sit in the oven and be ready for a late dinner when Charlie to back. Once the meat and onions were browned, the vegetables and stock added, and the whole pot placed in the oven to cook, I had reached a much calmer frame of mind and was ready to tackle step two: return Angela's call. I made the conversation as brief as possible, reassuring her that yes, I was feeling better and yes, I would be back at school the next day so no, I didn't need her to arrange bringing me my homework.

The call to Angela complete, I dragged myself upstairs for step three: take a shower. My hair was still full of grit and mud from my fall the day before, and my skin felt just as grimy, so I wasn't surprised, just a little disgusted by the murky colour of the water that ran off me and down the drain. The running water gave me an idea. What would really help me right now was that relaxed calm that I always achieved when I sat in my hollow at First Beach. I was in no condition to drive over there right now, but I had already proved to myself that I could pit myself in a similar state of mind here at home by imagining the sound of the waves crashing against the beach and ebbing away again. I quickly finished up in the shower and towelled myself off, pulling on my pyjamas and leaving my hair to dry in natural waves down my back.

Once I was in my room, I sat myself down on the floor, not wanting to risk falling asleep on my bed while my mind was still in such turmoil. I shuddered to think of the dreams that would chase me down into sleep if I did. "_Right. Step four then: get myself balanced again."_ I crossed my legs and let my hands fall loosely in my lap, my chin dropping to my chest as I relaxed my muscles as much as I could. I imagined the waves, and matched my breathing to the imaginary sounds.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

It took a little longer than it would in my hollow, but my body began to relax completely, and my mind started its usual drifting reverie. I let the turmoil and panic flow out on my exhales and gradually my mind emptied, allowing the thoughts to come and go as they pleased once more. The first thought to fly in was the same as the last thought I'd had before awareness fled and normal, restful sleep had taken me earlier that morning._ "When did I start thinking of Taha Aki as a separate person, rather than just the creation of my own mind?"_ Letting the memories of weeks of the same dreams flow through my mind, I wasn't able to pinpoint the time when I had begun thinking of his differently, but the fact that I _did_ was inescapable. He had become a companion I shared the dreams with, one who could point out which parts of the dreams to focus on, and which parts to skip over. The dreams that morning had been the first time he'd physically directed me, and the first time he'd displayed clear emotion, but now that I was allowing the memories to fly in and settle, I noticed that he _had_ appeared progressively more irritated with me each time the dream scenes repeated. Like a teacher frustrated with a student who was _just_ missing the point of an explanation each time it was made. Whilst I had often been frustrated with myself during my life, I'd never before constructed a character to portray this frustration, and so, for the first time I allowed myself to ponder the possibility that maybe he wasn't just a construct of my own, but something else. I wasn't at all prepared for the _right_ feeling that flowed over me right then, and then another thought shot in, quick as a darting fish. _"Of course it follows that if Taha Aki isn't just a figment of your imagination, then those dreams aren't you sending subconscious messages to yourself, but _something else." The thought darted back out again as quick as it had come, leaving only another _right_ feeling behind in its wake. The surprise almost jarred me out of my peaceful, floating state of mind. Not ready yet to let it go, I focused again on my breathing, letting the thought drift away again.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

For a long while, nothing new came forward, I was simply adrift without thought, letting the peaceful feeling soak into my every pore. Eventually though, a new thought made itself known. _"What on earth was Victoria talking about with all of her dog references in the letter?"_ It was an interesting point, despite the fear which that tiny alert part of my mind was trying hard not to feel. Putting aside her corny, melodramatic close to her note, she had mentioned dogs twice more; telling me I could hide in the dogs' kennel, and also that guard dogs wouldn't keep her away forever. But _what dogs?_ Charlie and I had no pets whatsoever, never had done, and as far as I was aware, none of our neighbours had so much as a chihuahua. Mrs Fenton, three houses up the street had several cats, but that was it. And even if all the neighbours had kept whole packs of Rottweilers, I didn't see how that would inconvenience a vampire for a moment, short of the barking being irritating while she killed me. One of those little itches in the back of my mind set in once more. Something to do with the phrase 'pack of dogs'. Knowing better than to try forcing the connection, I merely left my mind open, letting the knot unpick itself until I could see the relevant thread. _"You can hide in your dogs' kennel as much as you want" ... "No guard dogs can hold me off forever" ... "Pack of dogs." _The three things circled and bumped along in the front of my brain until they suddenly clicked together like pieces of a jigsaw. _"I don't have a dog, much less guard dogs; The only place I could be accused of 'hiding' in recently is the Rez, hardly a kennel," I mused. "But 'a pack' makes me think of _wolves_ as well as dogs, her word 'guard' brings _protector_ to mind, and the 'kennel', the _Rez_ ..." _The sudden realisation drove me right out of my relaxed state and I was sitting, wide eyed and staring, rigidly upright on the floor.

"Holy shit." I breathed "She's talking about _**wolves**_. She wasn't talking about an extinct species either." I knew I was talking to myself, but didn't care right at that moment. "Apart from the fact she'd have no way of knowing about them if they were extinct, long dead shape shifters would, of course offer no protection whatsoever, so that means they're back. There are wolves in the tribe again. HOLY SHIT!" I sprang to my feet, suddenly full of excitement. "The 'bear' sightings. It was _wolves_. There've got to be at least two of them - she was talking about dogs, plural, not dog, singular." I stopped abruptly, realising a terrible truth. _"All those missing or dead hikers and campers. If it wasn't a rogue bear, that means it _was_ Victoria. She's been around for months, trying to get to me, but not able to get past the wolves."_ I thought, not able to utter such a horrible conclusion out loud. All those people, dead. And ultimately because of me. I sat back down, this time on the edge of my bed. _"Do the shape shifters know she's after me? Or are they just protecting their territory in general?"_ I considered the question for a few minutes, turning it this way and that in my head. _"No. They're just protecting their territory. Most of the missing people disappeared miles away from me, so they'd have no reason to guess its me she's after."_ I flopped backwards across my bed, arms above my head, staring at the ceiling as I thought. I gave a wry snort of amusement suddenly, as another point struck me. _"No wonder Taha Aki was getting so frustrated with me. He's far too patient actually. How dense he must think I am, not to get what he's been trying to show me. Poor guy. I should have gotten it when he started showing me the 'then and now' stuff. All this time he's being trying to show me that the wolves are here _now_, not just _then_. But they don't know that _I_ need their protection in particular. And I don't know who they are, so I can't tell them."_ In fact, I knew it was more my stubborn streak, determinedly clinging to the 'facts' I thought I'd known, than stupidity. If I'd let myself accept that maybe what I'd thought I'd known wasn't precisely correct, then I probably would've realised the truth almost immediately.

I began picking away at this new knotty issue; how to find out who the wolves were so I could beg for their help, when I heard Charlie's cruiser pull up outside. My eyes flew to the dark window. It was much later than I'd guessed. I'd been sitting on the floor longer than I'd thought. I began pulling myself together so I wouldn't worry him over my mental state. Between the calm I'd gathered about me from sitting in my calm relaxed state, and the enormous relief that _maybe_ there might be some kind of help available to me after all, it was easier than I might've guessed to make myself appear 'normal', and I quickly but calmly headed downstairs to pull the stew from the oven and serve it up for our dinner.

Charlie looked about as exhausted as I felt as he trudged into the kitchen, removing his gun belt and hanging it up on a hook by the door, just as he always did. He slumped down into his chair at the table and gave me a weary smile.

"Hey, Bells. How're you feeling?"

"Sort of like you look, if I'm honest, Dad." I told him, squeezing his hand gently as I slid his plate in front of him. He sniffed appreciatively at the aromatic steam rising off the plate and dug straight in, barely waiting for me to sit down and join him. We ate together in silence for several minutes before he looked up from his plate and asked

"You and Jake pick up that bike of yours?" I swallowed nervously, both at the memory of finding the letter, and out of concern that Charlie might be about to ban me from riding my bike again. It seemed a little silly to me that I even cared; not five hours before I had been convinced I was sure to die within a few days, but here I was now, worried that I might have a favourite toy taken away? But it was more than that to me. It represented the changes I had been making, and still intended to make. It was freedom from fear of falling back in my pit. Despite only having one short, disastrous ride on it, I already loved that bike. I _needed_ that bike.

"Yes. We collected it on the way home from the clinic. Jake's got it at the workshop right now to check it over." I told him. He grunted, tucking back into his stew and chewing thoughtfully for a few moments.

"You're not getting back on that thing" I opened my mouth to protest, but he held up a hand to hold me off. "Without a helmet." He finished his sentence, and I sat back, relieved.

"No problem, Dad. I should probably have thought about one before anyway." He nodded his agreement and let the subject drop. I had gotten off pretty lightly on that one. I'd expected the conversation to go on for hours, but he'd obviously spoken his piece and was done with it. "Thanks, Dad. And I'm really sorry to have worried you again." I stood up and gave him a quick hug on my way to clear our plates away to the sink. He looked awkward but pleased at the gesture; neither of us were much for outward demonstrations of affection.

"Leave the dishes, Bells." He said. "We could both do with some decent sleep. I'll tackle the dishes in the morning if you'll set them to soak." I wasn't about to argue. After the sleep deprivation at the clinic, the finding of the letter and my subsequent meltdown, and then the revelations I'd had at home this afternoon, the day felt like it had been at least three weeks long, and in spite of the still lingering calm I had achieved on the floor in my room, I was exhausted. Physically, emotionally and mentally. Sleep sounded pretty good right then.

"Ok Dad. I've already showered, so I guess I'll head straight to bed then, ok?" He stood up and headed for the stairs himself.

"Sounds like a plan, kiddo. I'm gonna shower, then do the same. You sleep well."

"You too." I replied, and climbed the stairs to my room.

That night was the first since _He_ left that I didn't have the 'Alone in the Forest' nightmare. Ordinarily I'd have been ecstatic about that sort of progress, but knowing the cause; that my great fear of loneliness and unworthiness - which it had always been clear to me was the root of that particular nightmare - was now eclipsed by the fear of the all too real vengeful vampire who was now close enough to getting me that she could leave little notes attached to my property.

Instead of having to suffer through my usual waking up screaming, only to have to spend several minutes calming myself down enough to fall back asleep, I skipped straight ahead to the dream scenes which I had just begin to accept weren't actually of my own making, but something else's. I was wary when I found myself standing by the loggers trail with Taha Aki by my side. This was new. I guessed that now I'd worked out the full meaning behind the 'Victoria Attacks the Village' scene, I wouldn't be suffering repeats of it from now on. That had always been how these things worked in the past. I turned to look at Taha Aki. Well, more to glare at him really. It was time for some more direct answers if I could get them. So he wasn't a figment of my own subconscious attempting to communicate with my conscious mind, fine. I had accepted that, and my stubborn nature demanded that now I'd worked it out I wouldn't shy away from the truth. But I wanted the _whole_ truth. Not just the dribs and drabs I was being fed at his convenience.

"Right then, Taha Aki. Time for some answers I think. Don't you?" I asked him in a firm tone, folding my arms across my chest. "I know I've been stubborn about seeing the real truth instead of what I'd convinced myself was truth. But I'm done with that now. So it's time for you to spill. No more cryptic shit." He smiled indulgently at me but gently shook his head

"You're not ready yet, young one." He sat, cross legged on the ground and signalled for me to do the same. "Truths given but not learned lack the understanding necessary to put them into action." It was the longest speech I'd heard him make so far. Despite the cryptic nature of it I was able to follow his point, though I really didn't like what I'd heard. Just like in a math class, if someone provided you with the answers to every question on a quiz, but you didn't understand how the answers had been calculated, you hadn't actually _learned_ anything. Given a similar test later on, without the answers being provided, you fail.

"So what're you saying? You can't tell me _anything_?" I demanded crossly. He shook his head again.

"No, young one. This is one lesson you must learn. You listen, but don't _hear_. Look, but don't _see_. Understand, but don't _accept_. Of the three, the last is the most vital lesson to learn. Much of what you wish and need to know, you already understand. But until you accept what you understand, what could be, or should be, never _will_ be." He stood and held out his hand to help me up too. I was still trying to puzzle out the meaning of his latest cryptic offering as he began to lead me forward.

"Come. There are things you must see, and you need proper rest too." I took a step forward with him and instantly the scenery changed. I was standing in the middle of the meadow, _our_ meadow, and I waited for the echoing pain in my chest to rip through me with the memories, even inside my dream, but there was only a dull ache. Like regretful nostalgia, and nothing more. I was once again an observer, watching me/not me, dressed this time in modern clothes, being approached by a tall male figure. His features were blurred and I couldn't make out what he was wearing. In fact the only thing I could tell about this male was that he wasn't human. No human moved with that sort of grace.

"Vampire." I said,

"Yes." Taha Aki agreed. "Watch." I did. I watched as not me assumed a submissive stance and the vampire attacked. The scene reset. I watched as me/not me dropped to her knees, begging, and the vampire attacked. The scene reset again. I watched as me/not me ran, as me/not me became aggressive, and as me/not me looked uncertain and hesitant, and the vampire attacked. Finally I watched as me/not me appeared relaxed and confident, by her body language clearly chatting with the vampire, and the vampire hesitated, talking with her until as the scene faded to black, I saw him throw a surprised and fearful look over his shoulder. The meadow, the vampire, and me/not me disappeared and I was in La Push once more.

I was a little surprised to be seeing the Victoria scenes again, I'd thought these were done with now I'd solved the puzzles they held. This time, however, the scenes sped past me a breakneck speed, the only parts that stuck in my mind being the flashes of flame-like red hair. "_Wait. Flame-like hair. Forest on fire when I came off my bike. Flashes of red through the branches." _Even inside my dream my blood ran cold as ice. _"Fuck! She was _that_ close? Jake and Sam could've been killed. I must keep my distance until I've found the wolves and hopefully rid my life of the vengeful bitch, or it'll be more than just Charlie I put in danger alongside myself."_

The Victoria scenes completed, darkness rolled in again and I was once more alone with Taha Aki on the loggers trail. He turned to me, his face grave and stern, and spoke.

"So much to learn, young one, and little time to do it. Some paths may be altered by your actions, and only through seeing, understanding, and _accepting_ can you hope to make the right choices." He told me. Seeing I was struggling to understand, his expression gentled. "Acceptance is the key to relieving your greatest worry, and also to setting your feet on the path to true happiness. You have seen and understood much already, and now accepted some of it. Look to the rest of what you know, learn to accept truth and reject assumptions, and you will find what you seek." With that, he walked away from me and I felt the awareness I always felt in _those_ dreams slipping away with him as real sleep took me once again.

When I woke the next morning, the peace I had found the evening before was still with me to some degree, although it was edged with a buzzing sense of purpose. As I showered and dressed, my mind ran with half baked plans for finding out who the shape shifters were. I thought about it as I ate breakfast with Charlie, as I drove to school, as I sat through class, and as I hung out with Jake and Quil at the diner after school. I thought about it as I cooked for Jake, Billy, Charlie and myself at the Black's house, as I drove home, and as I got ready for bed. No matter what angle I held the problem at in my mind, though, I could see only two possible solutions.

One was safe, but very unlikely to succeed. I could just flat out confront Billy with what I knew, and ask him who the wolves were. He was the Chief of his tribe, he _must_ know the answer to my question. But there was no way he'd spill, he'd just pretend they were merely myths and legends, and I'd never get any more out of him.

The second solution would _probably_ get me a meeting with the shape shifters, but was very _very_ risky, I would be taking my life in my own hands. I could simply march myself into the forest, making as much noise about it as possible, and wait for Victoria to find me. Gambling my life on the hope that the wolves would be waiting for her to make her next move on the area, and would take their opportunity to close in on her.

It really was a huge risk to take, but after nearly twenty four hours of poking away at the problem, I just couldn't see any other way of getting to communicated with them, and so, reluctantly, I made my decision.

After school the next day I would make my desperate move.

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**So. A lot going on in this chapter. I'm still a little worried that I'm moving too quickly all of a sudden; trying to fit in too much in too short a time. If I'm right, and it ****_is _****too much, let me know and I'll try to give it a re-shuffle. **


	22. Chapter 21: Newbies and New Theories

**I had planned to upload this last night, but it would've been the first of 2 short Sam chapters, with a weird break off point in the middle. So I decided to just keep straight on and treat you all to one, big, long Sam chapter. Hope you didn't mind the extra wait too much. **

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit**.

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Chapter 21: Newbies and New Theories

Sam POV.

Embry turned out to be the easiest new wolf I'd dealt with so far, and the hardest. His natural calm, easygoing nature led him to gain control over his temper with much more ease than the rest of us had, and I was frankly amazed when he'd mastered the ability to hold back his anger, and was safe to return to school in about a week.

But that, of course, was where part of the difficulties with Embry began. Neither Jared nor Paul has had the sort of friends, more like brothers, that Embry did. Sure, they'd each had a group they'd hung out with, and close friends within those groups, but nothing like the bonds Embry had with Jake and Quil, so neither of them had found it too hard to ease themselves away from their friends, a necessity both to help protect our secret, and to keep their friends safe in case their tempers got the better of them. But Embry ... Poor Embry felt like I'd taken half his family away from him. He never _said_ as much, but sharing mind space, it was inevitable that I'd know, and _feel_, what he felt about it. He understood why I had to order him away from them, but that didn't make it any easier for him to do it. Both emotionally and physically.

Both his friends considered him family too, and neither of them was about to take Embry's strange new behaviour sitting down. They were angry and concerned; they knew _something_ was wrong, but of course Embry couldn't tell them what, so both their worry and their bitter anger made Embry's situation even harder for him to bear. Like me, he'd grown up with his family consisting of just himself and his mom, and losing two friends he loved like brothers was tearing him up. And there lay the other difficulty with Embry's phase. The fact that he _had_.

He shouldn't have been one of us at all. His mother, Tiffany, was a member of the Makah tribe, who had moved to La Push single and pregnant. Everyone had always assumed that Embry's father was also Makah, and Tiffany had never challenged the assumption. But now we knew better. His father _had_ to be Quileute, and not just any member either, but one who carried the wolf bloodlines. That put just three men in the frame for fathering him; Billy Black, Quil's father, Quil IV, or my own father, Joshua. All three would've been married when Embry was conceived, so the possibility for scandal and in-fighting was huge. We all hoped that the culprit was Joshua; he had already proved himself a shitty husband and father, so there was less potential anger and heartache for everyone concerned if it was true. I hoped it was true for another reason too. Having grown up alone with my mother, and especially now she wasn't talking to me, I craved true family connections like a middle-aged woman with PMS craves chocolate. To know I had a half brother would be amazing. Especially one like Embry. He was a smart, kind, calm soul and although I'd not known him past the nodding if we passed on the street stage before he phased, now, only a little more than a week later, I really enjoyed his company. Unfortunately, getting a DNA test done to see if we shared a father was just not possible. None of us knew what an analysis of our DNA might reveal about us, so instead we were forced to content ourselves with trying to spot similarities in our features, both human and wolf. I often fancied I could see something familiar in the shapes of our mouths and noses, and Paul swore that the black spots on Embry's wolf's grey fur were due to our shared parent.

How Embry himself felt about the revelation regarding his father, whichever of the three it was, he was trying hard to keep to himself. He seemed to doing a pretty good job of keeping Jared and Paul in the dark, but keeping his Alpha out of his head was a much harder task. I'd had more than a few flashes of his true feelings on the matter, and they were a tangled mess of relief at knowing the possible candidates had narrowed down from hundreds to just three, anger with his mother for refusing to tell him what he had every right to know, shame for the knowledge that his very existence proved that one man had betrayed his wife and family, and hope that he might one day discover which of us, Jake, Quil, or myself was really his half brother.

When Jared, Paul and I found him, the day we'd chased the leech to Port Angeles, Embry was, unsurprisingly, a quivering, shivering reck, lying, muzzle tucked under his front paws, on the forest floor, tail tucked between his legs, and shaking from head to toe. What _was_ surprising was that he'd managed to stay put without an Alpha order; his natural instinct would've been to run, as the rest of us had done when we has first phased. I was impressed and told him so.

_"You did well, Embry. Now you need to try to calm yourself down, so you can phase back."_ He seemed surprised at my praise, so I let him see how I had reacted the first time I phased, and Jared and Paul, taking their cue from me did the same. I could feel Embry's pride at handling himself so well in the circumstances, and I let him feel my own pride for him too. As a distraction it was working well. His shaking slowed and then came to a complete stop, and his muzzle came out from under his paws to rest on top of them instead. I'd learned from Jared and Paul's first phases that it would be quicker to just show him my memories of Billy telling the wolf stories, rather than attempting to put them into my own words, so I did the same for him, not knowing if he would've heard them at all before now as he had been brought up as Makah, not Quileute. He seemed fascinated by the legends, but incredulous about the existence of vampires, so I decided an educational visit might be in order before we started trying to help him phase back.

_"Jared, you can have the honour of burning the leech's fingers as they're your trophies." _I told him._ "Take Embry with you. He could benefit from seeing proof of the bloodsuckers' existence and also get a nose for this particular bitch's scent."_

_"Ok, Boss." _I winced internally at the term, knowing that Embry would almost certainly pick up the habit now too. Jared stood and looked to Embry, jerking his head in the correct direction_. "Come on then, Newbie, lets go finger hunting."_ Embry rose to his feet, confusion and curiosity colouring his mind.

_"I'll show you as we run." _Jared told him, and they slipped off silently through the trees.

Once they were gone, Paul started walking along the tree line toward his house.

_"Left my shorts back in Port Angeles in the rush to get to the redhead in time."_ He told me as he made a quick dash to his own back door, looking under the steps for one of the spare pair he kept under there for emergencies. We both phased back and went into his house, grabbing a beer from the fridge as we passed through the kitchen.

"So, you think it was a coincidence, the redhead veering off track like that and making a beeline for the Swans?" Paul asked me, twisting the cap off his beer and taking a long drink. It was the same question I'd been asking myself.

"I really don't know, Paul. On the one hand, it's a bit of a coincidence, isn't it? She's been heading towards their street whenever we've chased her off before, and then, bam, she's making right for them, completely off her usual course. On the other hand, it's just as possible that she was heading in her usual direction, caught a whiff of Charlie or Bella, or both, and decided to take a detour for a quick bite." He rolled his eyes at my bad, unintentional pun.

"I guess it's possible." He said reluctantly. "But coincidences like that make me uncomfortable. I was wondering if the bitch had caught Charlie's scent after he'd been out searching for that first missing person, and decided it was a vintage she'd enjoy, so she's been gunning for him ever since." I took a gulp from my beer, picking at the label as I considered Paul's theory. It actually wasn't a bad one.

"So you think that's why it looks like she's been heading towards their place?" I asked him.

Yeah." He said, leaning forward as he warmed to his theory more. "And I just realised, if she knows he's a police officer, she might've been taking the hikers and campers on purpose, to draw him out where she could get him before we could stop her." Paul looked both excited and horrified at his realisation. I was chilled to the bone. I'd always respected Charlie, but over the last few weeks I'd really come to like him, look up to him as a sort of father figure. God knows I'd never had a real one to look up to. The idea of a leech hunting him was just appalling.

"Fuck." I breathed. "You could be right. It would explain a lot. Although why she thinks Charlie's something she's 'owed' is beyond me. Something about it feels a little off, but it's the best working theory we've got, so I think we'll up security on Charlie for a while." Paul nodded. I was a little surprised he didn't make a fuss about protection for the 'leech lover's' father coming before protection for the Rez, but then I realised a couple of things. First, it was _Paul's_ theory, so he wasn't about to dismiss it, second, Charlie had done a lot for Paul in particular lately, and Paul was nothing if not loyal to those he thought deserved it.

A short sharp howl from the forest nearby alerted us to the return of Jared and Embry, so pay land I headed outside to phase back to wolf form once more. The moment we phased we could feel Embry's shock, horror and revulsion at what he had witnessed.

_"They just kept wriggling. Like two thick, white worms, digging through the leaf mould. If we'd left them would they have eventually found their owner? Can the leech feel her missing fingers? We're the fingers aware at all."_ The image in his mind of the redhead's lost digits s rambling about kept repeating in his mind. They were interesting questions, and ones which I couldn't believe none of us had thought to ask before. Personally I hoped the bitch had felt it when Jared burnt her fingers. It was the very least of what she deserved.

_"Huh. Imagine if the parts of a partially dismembered leech did eventually find the rest of their body" _I mused._ "It's got to be the easiest way of tracking a leech ever. Just follow the ripped off hand or whatever, then tear the rest of the leech apart."_ Jared gave a small sniff and rolled his eyes towards Embry. I grasped his point immediately. None of this was serving to calm him down any. I shook the thought clear.

_"Thoughts for another time though. Embry, you need to try to calm yourself if you can. Phasing back to human form takes concentration. You need to imagine yourself as human. The best way is to picture yourself doing something that requires a human form. Paul, why don't you show him."_ Paul nodded and began to imagine himself driving. He pictured every tiny detail as clearly as he could. From taking the keys out of his pocket and putting them in the ignition, to putting the car in gear and turning the wheel. Then he smoothly phased back to his human form and stood there naked before us.

_"See? It's both simple and yet very complicated at the same time." _I told Embry._ "Jared?" _Jared pictured himself brushing and braiding his imprint, Kim's hair. It was a peaceful, relaxing scene and I silently commended Jared on picking something that both demonstrated the best way to phase back and at the same time help to relax and calm Embry some. His playful, light-hearted nature made it easy to forget the deep thinking that often went on behind Jared's joking nature. As Jared flowed back into his human form I turned to Embry. I didn't expect him to get it right first time; it had taken the rest of us several attempts to manage to phase back, but I had hopes that with his calm nature, Embry might get it before too many hours passed.

_"Ok then. Imagine yourself doing something that requires hands, something that you enjoy, that relaxes you."_ I told him, and he began to picture a scene of him playing cards. In his mind he shuffled and dealt, his friends appearing at a table with him, Jake, Quil, and then Bella. They talked and laughed as they played, and I was so fascinated by this insight into a laughing, playful Bella, that for a moment I forgot to help Embry focus. Realising after a moment that I had allowed my attention to wander, I re-focused and began to direct Embry once more.

_"That's it. Concentrate on how relaxed you are, then on your hands. Picture yourself shuffling and dealing again. Allow yourself to feel the cards in your hands, feel your fingers gripping the edges, feel the smoothness of the cards as they slide over each other, then push your mind into the human form you're imagi..."_ I stopped short in my coaching as Embry amazed us all and phased back. It was a choppy phase, sure, forced bit by bit rather than as a smooth motion, but nevertheless he'd done it first try. I phased back and joined with the other two in congratulating him.

"Really well done, Embry. None if us managed it first try. We're all very impressed." I assured him and he blushed a little, probably in part from being naked in front of three relative strangers as well as from embarrassment at the praise. Paul handed him some of his spare shorts from under his back steps and Embry scrambled to get them on as quickly as possible. We all filed back inside Paul's house, as his mother wasn't likely to return for several more hours, and Paul grabbed a beer for each of us as we all flopped down in the living room. The next couple of hours were spent filling Embry in on the ins and outs of his new life. We covered who he could and couldn't tell, patrolling routes and schedules, signal howls and fighting tactics. Despite his calm disposition, I planned to keep him off school for at least a week to help him come to terms with things before he would have to confront his friends. This of course was something he wasn't at all happy with, but after explaining the dangers of both exposure of the secret and accidentally hurting them, he reluctantly agreed without me having ti issue an order. I set him to patrolling alongside Jared for the next few days, until he'd learned the routes for himself, and then we left, Paul heading out for his turn at patrolling, and the rest of us to our respective homes.

The next week and a half was hard on all of us, taking extra time to help train Embry, while still keeping up our usual patrolling schedule, and then even more so when he returned to school and had to separate himself from Jacob and Quil. We all felt his depression like it was our own, and so on the Sunday I decided a rest day with a bit of bonding was called for. Billy had told me that Jake had finished work on the bikes and would be calling Bella to come over. Charlie had already arranged to come over to the Rez to watch a game with billy and Harry Clearwater, so, with both Swans on the Rez and relatively safe, I ran a early patrol, the met the rest of the pack on top of the cliffs for some cliff diving. It was just what we'd all needed; the chance to relax and act our ages for a change. I always worried over the way these teenaged boys were forced to become adults overnight, so seeing them, if only for a short time, able to throw off the responsibility weighing on them lightened my own burden a little.

We'd been on top of the cliffs for a couple of hours, messing about like unruly kids, when I heard the unmistakable roar of Bella's truck driving down the coast road. Looking over, I could see the bikes in the back of the truck lurch as the truck suddenly skidded to a stop. Bella jumped out of the cab, gesticulating wildly first at the cliff where we were, and then at who I assumed was Jake still sitting in the truck. I wondered what the problem was for a moment before a few screeching words drifted over to us.

"Fuck...fall...phone. NOW!" I heard her yell, and realised at once what was going on. _"Ah. She thought Paul _fell_, rather than jumped." _As I watched, she began to calm a little so I assumed that Jake was explaining to her just what we were doing, and that no one needed medical help. Not sure where they were planning to take the bikes to ride, I guessed I should shadow them, I had after all given my word to Charlie to keep her out of harm's way. Saying a quick goodbye to the guys, I jogged down the track from the cliff to the lay-by where I'd left my truck earlier, and I raced off in the direction I'd seen them heading, keeping my window open so I could catch their scents as I drove and not lose them. As it turned out I didn't have to worry about losing them, Bella's ancient truck being so slow, I was more in danger of them noticing me trailing them than I was of losing sight of them. They pulled onto an unused loggers trail, and I held back at the entrance, not wanting to interrupt them, but at the same time wishing I could be a witness to her first ride. As I sat there in my truck, listening to Jake double check with her that she knew what to do, I allowed myself a little fantasy of Bella, dressed in skintight biking leathers swinging her leg over her bike to dismount, removing her helmet and flicking her head back to shake free her hair. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, rearranging my now half hard dick in my cut-offs. The sound of a bike being kick started after several attempts cut through my reverie and I could just make out Jake's voice over the engine.

"Ok now, Bells. Slow and steady. Keep your feet out to start with, so you can catch yourself if you need to, and give it just a little gas as you slowly release the clutch" with that I heard the bike slowly moving off. The engine got louder as the speed apparently increased, she was obviously growing in confidence, I smiled to myself, impressed with how quickly she had picked up the basics.

Suddenly the engine noise cut out completely and I was chilled to the bone to hear Jake's panicked voice yelling.

"BELLA! Oh fuck no." Another, different bike was kick started and by the sound of it, ridden at speed along the track. _"Fuck. What the hell happened?"_ I wondered, starting my own engine up and heading up the trail to see if I could help. I hoped it was nothing more serious than a little tumble, but the panic I'd heard in Jake's voice was disconcerting. By the time I got past Bella's truck and far enough up the trail to round the bend and see what was happening, Jake had already reached her, dismounted his own bike, and was bending over her lying in the grit and mud. from the gouge her bike had put into the ground, she had been going too fast to make the turn and the bike had skidded out from under her. Visions of broken limbs raced through my mind, causing a little panic of my own, which was more than doubled when Jake moved just enough for me to see her face and realise she wasn't wearing a helmet. _"Stupid idiots. It didn't occur to them to get her a helmet, at least for her first time?"_ I pulled my truck over to the side of the trail, in case an ambulance might be needed - it would have to be able to get past easily - and could hear Jake still panicking as he tried to get Bella to answer him. _"Shit. She must've hit her head. Is she conscious?"_ I could clearly hear her breathing, so I knew she was alive, but Jake's position, kneeling next to her meant that I couldn't see any more of her than her mud encrusted legs.

"Bells? Bella? BELLA?! Are you ok? Did you hit your head? Can you move everything?" The desperation in Jake's voice was clear, he was close to breaking point. He began patting down her limbs, running his hands over her legs, looking for injuries, and despite knowing precisely _why_ he was doing it, and despite the tension of the situation, I could barely keep myself in check. My wolf really didn't like seeing his hands on her like that. _"What the fuck is that about? First the scent thing, now no-one's allowed to touch her?" _I'm not sure if I was asking my human self or my wolf self this question, but either way, this wasn't the time for internal debate. Bella had apparently hit her head, and without a helmet, it could very well be a serious injury.

"Heeeey Jakey. Watcha doooin'?" I was relieved to hear her voice; she was conscious, although from the slow, slurring speech it was clear she'd hit her head very hard. Jake answered her, clearly relieved himself to have her finally answer him.

"Just checking you've not broken anything, Bells. Relax. I'm not getting fresh or anything. You hit your head?" I jumped out of my truck and was striding over to them as Jake asked her this. Her reply was strangely cheerful, and still slurred. She sounded almost drunk.

"Yup. Haaaard."

"BELLA! You ok? Is she ok? Bella?" I was still a couple of yards behind Jake, but I couldn't hold my worry in check any longer.

"That's clever." She slurred. "Do it again." I was confused. _"What's clever? do what again? What's she on about?"_ Jake turned to look at me, his face holding the same confusion I felt. Once he saw who it was that'd called out, though, his face hardened into an angry mask. I was saddened but not surprised. He and Quil blamed me personally for what they saw as Embry's betrayal of their friendship, but while I sympathised for their loss as they saw it, right now I just didn't have time to tip-toe around his feelings; Bella's welfare was the priority. I peered over his shoulder at Bella, getting my first proper view of her. She didn't look too good. There was no blood that I could see or smell, but she was caked in mud and grit, her jeans, the shirt and hoodie she was wearing, which she'd clearly commandeered from Charlie once again, and her hair and face were all thick with it, and much more worrying, her eyes were unfocused and a little crossed.

"Bella! Are you ok?" I asked her._ "That was a fucking stupid question, Sam, she's just dug a trench into to trail, using her head and body. Of course she's not ok!" _

"No, no, noooo. That's not how you do it. Get Jake to show you how. He can say it without his lips moving." She answered, confusing me again. "I can see your lips moving. They're pretty. You've got a pretty mouth, Sam's face. It's a shame the rest of you isn't here. I like looking at your cheese grater."

I couldn't help the pleased smirk that washed over my face. Finally I was getting a sign that she was interested in me. My wolf was having a little party in my head at the thought. Maybe I was right and it wouldn't be a problem for my wolf if I was to date her which, now I knew she at least had some interest in me, I was totally planning on asking her. She continued talking, the pronounced slur in her voice still there.

"No. Wait. I don't mean cheese grater. Hey! Did you see the pretty fire in the trees?" Just at that moment there was a tiny shift in the breeze. A familiar, sickly sweet, bleachy smell hit my nose instantly. _"Shit! The leech. She's here. Got to get Bella away from here, NOW. Got to get them _both_ away from here."_ I quickly formed a plan to do so as quickly as possible. I turned to Jake.

"She must've hit her head pretty hard." I said. "We'd better get her to the clinic. My truck's right on the bend there. If I carry her to it, can you ride your bike back to her truck and drive it to meet us there? We can pick her bike up later." His jaw tensed. He clearly knew I was right, but the source of the advice was sticking in his craw.

"Fine. But you be careful with her. I'll only be a few minutes behind you. He warned me, then turning back to Bella he told her "Bells. Sam's gonna drive you to the clinic. I'll meet you there, ok?"

"Silly Jakey. A face can't drive. Sam's face should've brought the rest of him. It's got arms. They're very muscly. They could help." Any other time I would've laughed, both at her almost drunken rambling, and at the fact that she had clearly been admiring my muscles, but I was beginning to tremble, needing to phase due to the proximity of the leech, but knowing I couldn't with Jake and Bella here; I was almost desperate to get her away to safety as soon as possible, and all the talking was holding things up. Her slurring ramble continued, however. "Also you could grate abs on his cheese. No. That's not right either. Cheese on his abs. That's it. You could cheese abs on his grates." Jake stood up and I stepped forward to pick her up.

"Hey, there's the rest of him now." Her slurring was getting worse, and she was beginning to look pretty sleepy, she was definitely concussed, and now another danger was clear; I couldn't let her fall asleep with a concussion. Her eyelids started to droop. "Now his arms are here, he can drive." I picked her up and pulled her against my body, taking in a nose-full of her wonderful scent, mixed with Charlie's due to his shirt and hoodie, to settle myself down and it worked; slowing and then stopping my trembling and calming my almost feral wolf into a more manageable mindset. as I walked towards my truck, she forced her eyes open again.

"Taha Aki's seen your butt." She said, matter of factly. "But it's ok, cos you smell good." I was so shocked i actually missed my step and tripped before catching my stride again and heading, quicker now, to place her into my truck. _"What the actual FUCK?" _I wondered. _"Where the hell did she hear that name? And what the hell does she mean, he's seen my butt?"_ She nuzzled her face into the crook of my neck and her eyes drifted shut again._ "Wait. She thinks I smell good?"_ My wolf was loving that, it served to calm him even more.

"So do you, Bella, so do you." I murmured quietly so she wouldn't catch it. She was falling asleep, and I couldn't allow that, not with a head injury. "Stay awake now. Keep those pretty eyes open for me, Bella. We'll be at the clinic in just a few minutes." She looked like she was trying hard to do as I asked, but she was definitely struggling. Pulling my cell out of my pocket, I dialled Jared's number. It rang for a long time, and I was just about to give up and end the call, when suddenly I heard his voice.

"Yeah?" He sounded out of breath. I guessed he'd had to run up the cliff path to get to his cell before it stopped ringing.

"Redhead. Old loggers trail. Cut through the forest due East and you'll hit her trail." I murmured, knowing he'd hear me with no trouble, but not wanting Bella to catch my words. "All three of you go, but try to keep Embry under wraps unless you're 100% positive you can take her out or good. You were right the other day; having a fourth wolf to take her by surprise might be the ideal tactic."

"On it, Boss" he replied and hung up immediately. I relaxed a little knowing I'd put the pack on her trail. I'd felt torn between needing to get Bella out of danger and knowing there was a bloodsucker on MY Rez and needing to chase her off or kill her. That job done, I quickly called Billy's place, giving him a quick run down on Bella's accident (but keeping the leech business to myself, for now at least) and asking him to have Charlie meet us at the clinic.

Looking over at Bella, I could see her struggling to fight off the sleep again. I kept talking to her as I drove, shaking her shoulder gently when it looked like she was giving in to the sleep that was trying to overtake her. I told her how I enjoyed working with her at the drop-in centre, how much I liked her and admired her determination to change her life and overcome her depression. I told her how impressed I was with the way she was continuing to stand up against the bullying tactics of the local gossips. I was fairly certain she didn't register any of what I said past the fact that my talking was preventing her from giving in to sleep. I sped across La Push, taking every short cut I knew and was at the clinic surprisingly fast. Arriving at the clinic, I jumped out of the truck and ran round to the passenger side, pulling her gently out and carrying her through the clinic doors to stand in front of a very startled Sue Clearwater. Looking down at a very pale by now Bella, I told her

"We're here. Stay awake now. No sleeping." She once again forced her eyes open, wincing at the bright lights of the clinic.

Sue had me lay Bella down on a hospital bed and I held her hand while Sue picked up a little pen-light.

"Hello, Bella. I'm Sue Clearwater." She said, shining the light into Bella's eyes and switching it from one eye to the other, then back again.

"Can I go to sleep now please?" Bella asked plaintively. "I just want a little sleep."

"In a little while. First I need to check you over and take a couple of X-rays. But once I'm done, you can sleep." Sue replied reassuringly, and she tried to wheel Bella away from me to the x-ray machine. I couldn't make myself let go of her hand. Not until I knew she was going to be ok. Sue gave me a curious look and I shrugged at her.

"We both know the x-rays won't harm me. I'll stay with her til she's allowed to go to sleep, or until Charlie gets here." I whispered to Sue, and she raised a questioning brow at me, but made no comment.

The X-rays only took about ten minutes, and Sue and the clinic doctor looked at them while I sat by Bella's bed, still holding her hand. I could clearly hear the doctor mumbling to Sue about the pictures.

"Well she's either the most accident prone person I've ever encountered, or a victim of some serious child abuse." He was telling her. "Look at all these old hairline fractures. Most of them are years old, but if this is what her skull x-rays look like, I'd hate to see images f her arms and legs." He shook his head and I quietly snorted. As if Charlie would abuse Bella as a child, or allow anyone else to do so. He would've spotted the signs in an instant and fought Bella's mother tooth and nail for custody if he'd gotten even the slightest whiff of violence against his daughter. No. She was quite simply just the clumsiest, most accident prone person in the world, I had no doubt. Finally, they stopped talking and Sue walked over to us.

"The doctor says Bella can get some sleep now, but we'll be waking her hourly to do vitals." She told me, trying hard not to eye my hand and how it was still keeping its grip on Bella's. I nodded my understanding and the next time Bella's eyes began to drift shut I didn't try to keep her awake, I just let her fall asleep quietly.

Once I was sure she was fast asleep, I gently pulled my hand free and went outside to wait for Charlie to arrive. Jake got there first though, giving me an angry glare as he stalked into the clinic. I pretended not to let it bother me, but in truth his anger did make me sad. I would've done almost anything to have prevented Embry from having to join us, had I known he was going to, and the same went for Jake, who must be only days away from his first phase now if I was reading the signs correctly, and for Quil, who by the looks of things - his height and muscle tone, and according to Old Quil his temperature - wouldn't be far behind Jake.

I pulled out my cell, and once again dialled Jared's number, wanting an update on the leech's whereabouts. He answered on the second ring this time, he'd obviously been waiting on my call.

"Missed her, Boss." He told me straight away, knowing what I'd ask before I asked it. "She was gone before we even got there. Headed straight back along that corridor and out of the area again." I was torn between relief that she was off the Rez, and frustration that we missed her. _Again_.

"So much for the theory that taking a chunk out of her would see her off for good." I said, rolling my eyes to myself. "Not even two weeks later and she's back. But Paul's theory that she's after Charlie isn't looking strong now either. It was Bella she was watching this time."

"I wouldn't put that theory to bed just yet." Jared argued.

"What do you mean?" I asked, confused.

"What was she wearing?" He asked me. I wondered where he was going with this.

"Jeans, a shirt and a hoodie." I told him. "Why? What the hell is that to do with anything?"

"One of Charlie's shirts again?" He questioned. I was momentarily stunned. How had I missed that?

"_Fuck_." I breathed. "You're right, it was. And his hoodie too. She must've caught his scent off them and come running." Paul's theory was looking stronger. I heard Charlie's cruiser approaching.

"Got to go. Double up on patrol runs. Take Paul with you, and send Embry home for some rest. I'll take over with him in a couple of hours."

"Got it, Boss." He replied and hung up. Just moments later, Charlie pulled into the parking lot and I walked inside with him. After getting the full story from Jake, he went into Bella's room to sit with her, and I wandered off to grab myself some coffee and something to eat.

Returning to the waiting area outside Bella's room a couple of hours later, I was just in time to see Charlie coming out to seek some coffee himself. He looked a little shaken, unsurprisingly, at his daughter's accident, so I decided to leave off telling him the full details of Bella's adventure until she was completely out of danger. Jake had already gone in to sit with her so, nodding at Charlie as he walked past me to find his coffee, I quietly slipped into the room too, leaning against the wall by the door and running my eyes over her in the bed.

"What do _you_ want?" Jake asked rudely, not bothering to turn and look at me. He was beginning to tremble slightly. I didn't want to trigger his first phase right here in the clinic, so close to Bella, so I answered as quietly and calmly as possible.

"Just wanted to look in on her and see how she's doing." The nurse walked in just then to wake Bella, so Jake was prevented from answering. He turned and glare at me instead. I kept my eyes on Bella, and saw her open her eyes and look blearily at Jake the, wincing at the movement, turn her head towards me. As she turned her head back, the nurse shone her little flashlight into each eye in turn.

"Jake." Bella called, dragging his attention away from me. "Is my bike ok?" He rolled his eyes.

"I don't know, Bells, I was kinda more concerned about you and the dent you made in your head than the bike." I snorted in amusement, and Jake continued. "You should've seen yourself. Your eyes were all wonky and you were talking complete shit." He grinned a little. "If that's how you are when you're concussed, I shudder to think what you might be like drunk." I actually agreed with Jake on this one. She was pretty funny as a concussed patient. I bet she'd be hilarious as a drunk. She opened her mouth to protest, but the nurse interrupted her.

"She needs her rest, boys. Best to let her sleep now. We're going to have to keep waking her every hour as it is." I pushed myself off the wall and walked over to Bella's bed.

"I'm glad to see you're doing a little better. You get some rest and I'll come see you tomorrow, if that's ok?" She nodded at me sleepily and I left, leaving Jake to say his own goodbye. I had a couple of things to talk to her about; that Taha Aki comment for one, and for the other? Well, now I knew she was attracted to me, I was going to take my chance. Maybe she was ready fo a date. If I didn't ask, I'd never know if I had a hope, but I wasn't going to ask either question while I had an audience, so they'd both have to wait til the next day. I walked out of the clinic and to my truck, driving home and phasing as soon as I got there.

_"Anything?" _I asked Jared and Paul.

_"All clear, Boss" _Jared answered and phased back out.

_"Fuck all." _Came Paul's reply.

_"Ok. Good job, Paul. Do me a favour and wake Embry on your way home?" _I asked him._ "Tell him to phase and meet me by the cliffs."_

_"Will do, Boss"_ he said, and I began my patrol run, angling towards the ocean to meet up with Embry.

We completed our patrol shift at two that morning, and Jared phased in right on time to take over. Both Embry and I headed to my place. I'd offered him the spare room to catch a few hours sleep without his mom giving him trouble for sneaking out on a school night, and once we got in I threw four frozen pizzas in the oven and we devoured two each before stumbling off to bed. He was already gone, I assumed to get to school, when I woke at about eleven the next morning, so I showered and made myself a huge breakfast of eggs and bacon before making my way back to the clinic to see Bella. I was a little nervous about asking her about her Taha Aki comment, and a _lot_ nervous about asking her out on a date, but I wasn't one to back down. I'd decided to take my chance, and I was going to do just that.

When I arrived outside her room, a nurse was just about to take a tray of food in to her.

"I can take that for you." I offered, and she gratefully handed the tray over. I pushed the door open and walked in, waking her with my entrance.

"Hey there, Bella. How're you doing now?" I asked, setting the tray down on the little hospital table by her bed. "I just intercepted the nurse bringing this in for you."

"A little better, just tired." She sat up, blearily wiping the hair back from her face. She looked amazing, her hair all tangled and wild, and with that tired expression she appeared ... _"All fucked out. That's how she looks. Fucking hot!"_ That was all my mind could manage right then, I shoved my hands in my pockets quickly, hoping to disguise the more than half a hard on I was now sporting due to my over active imagination. As the smell of the food reached her, her stomach began making alarmingly loud noises, and I was glad of the distraction for both of us. She blushed and I couldn't help my chuckle - it was mainly from relief that she'd not noticed the uncomfortable bulge in the front of my cut-offs.

"Well that answers my next question" I said. "I was going to ask if you were hungry." Her blush grew deeper.

"Well I guess I could manage something." She was trying to sound casual, like her stomach hadn't just made a noise like a feral bear, but she wasn't fooling anyone, she was clearly starving. I wondered when she'd last eaten. Probably breakfast the day before. I pushed the little table over her bed, and she tucked a pillow behind herself to stop herself from falling backwards. Once she'd started eating I started in on my questions.

"So," I began, sitting on the end of her bed, still trying to hide my now slowly deflating hard on. "You were saying some... Interesting stuff yesterday. Can you remember any of it?" She paused in her chewing, obviously thinking back, trying to remember what she'd said. She took her time thinking it through, then suddenly turned a deep, fire engine red. Yep. She'd remembered alright. I smirked, remembering all her talk about my pretty mouth, muscly arms and, if I'd successfully cracked her weird, concussed code, my cheese grater abs.

"Oh hell." She hung her head in defeat. "Can I plead temporary insanity? You can't hold what a girl says when her brain's all jellied against her, right?" I laughed out loud, loving the way she was always so honest about her embarrassment, just like she'd been with the condom incident.

"I guess if you put it like that I'll have to cut you some slack this time." I said to her clear relief. I spotted an in for asking her for a date, and carefully set it up. "Though that'll make three you owe me" I added, and she swallowed nervously, looking thoughtful for a moment and then suddenly growing even redder. A wonderful waft of her arousal drifted to my nose and my previously waning half hard on sprung back to full mast instantly. _"Now what was she thinking that caused _that_ reaction?"_ I wondered. Briefly wishing she was inside the pack mind so I could see whatever it was. Insanely curious though I was, I let it go. For now.

"There was something else you said though, that I'm curious about." I went on, leaning forward a little. She looked almost panicked, though the arousal had spiked again for a brief second, and my curiosity almost burned me with its intensity.

"Y-yes? What was that then?" She asked.

"You talked about someone called Taha Aki. I was wondering where you'd heard the name?" She laughed a little shrilly, obviously relieved, and said

"Oh that? It just a name I think I probably read in a book. I had this dream where he was talking to me." I was very troubled by that. I'd assumed someone, probably Jake or Quil, not Billy -he'd have known better, had told her the name. But there was no way in hell she'd read it. The name was taboo. No book could've had it in print.

"Well _that's_ not possible" I muttered, too quiet for her to hear, but i let the subject drop. I didn't _think_ she was lying, I _hoped_ she wouldn't lie to me anyway, so maybe she couldn't remember where she'd heard it. I couldn't think of any other explanation. I cleared my throat and looked out the window.

"I hear Jake's coming by to pick you up once he's out of school." I said, stalling while I collected the nerve to ask my next question. "Are you going to stop and pick up your bike on the way home, or did you need me to go do it?"

"No that's fine, thanks." She said, picking up her fork again. "We'll do it on the way."

"Ok then. There's just the issue of these favour you owe me then." I said with a little smirk. "I'd like to cash one of those in now, if I could." She looked a little concerned.

"Oookaaay" I said guardedly, obviously not wanting to commit herself til she knew what I was going to ask. "So what exactly is it you want?" Ignoring the screaming double entendre begging for attention in her question, I took a firm grip on my nerve and plunged straight in before I could chicken out.

"A date." I said quickly. She looked confused.

"A date?" She asked. "Like a dinner and movie, going out together, picking me up from my house kind of date?"

"No, a fruit from a palm tree." I rolled my eyes with a grin. "Of course a going out together kind of date. So what do you say? Wednesday night? I know it's a school night, but they're showing a few old classics at the movie theatre in Port Angeles Wednesday night. We won't be late, I promise." I got it all out in a rush, my mouth almost tripping overitself in its hurry to get the asking part over with. She still looked confused. Her mouth hung open in shock, and I reached out and gently pushed it closed with a couple of fingers. _"Fuck. What I'd like to stick in there!" _The thought popped in before I could stop it, and I quickly shook it off before it could make my bulging cut-offs problem any worse.

"I ... Um ... So ..." She was completely at a loss for words. I grew worried. _"Oh shit. I've completely fucked this up. She's not interested. I've mis-read it completely. Oh shit, shit, shit. Abort! Abort!" _I thought, completely panicked.

"It's ok, Bella. If you're really not interested, that's fine. We'll just forget I said anything about it." I said in a rush, standing up and turning towards the door, before she could notice my hard on, which was rapidly deflating with my embarrassment and disappointment.

"NO!" She yelled, shocking the hell out of me. She lowered her voice. "I mean no, it's fine. Wednesday's fine. If you'd like. Um ... What time?" I was almost weak at the knees with relief.

"Four thirty sound ok?" I asked. "We can eat after the movie and I can have you back home by ten thirty or eleven at the latest."

"O-ok" she stammered. "Four thirty on Wednesday then." I gave her a huge grin.

"Good." I turned for the door once again. "I'd better be going. I've got several jobs on at the moment, so I should get back to them or I'll never get paid." I was just about to open the door, when I had a thought. Wanting to press my advantage a little, I quickly strode back over to her and bent down, my face coming level to hers, getting a strong waft of her beautiful scent. Despite wanting more, I just placed a warm, gentle kiss on her cheek, lingering for just a few seconds before pulling back with a small smile.

"Til Wednesday. Bye Bella." I said in a low voice, and she nodded silently at me. I walked back to the door and this time left through it, not mentioning the fact that she was dripping pasta sauce on the bed, and smiling to myself at the pleasant tingling I could still feel on my lips from where they had pressed against her skin.


	23. Chapter 22: Dead Deer and Dates

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit**.

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Chapter 22: Dead Deer and Dates

Bella POV

Of course it was typical that the one night I would've welcomed a few of _those_ dreams to guide my way through my dangerous next move, I instead had my first dream free night of sleep in several months. I woke feeling like I'd never slept better in my life, but still I couldn't help but feel a bit abandoned by Taha Aki when I needed him most.

Charlie had gotten in the habit of grabbing one of his shirts from his closet every morning and hanging it my door handle and that morning was no exception, a green plaid flannel shirt was waiting for me when I came out of the bathroom and I pulled it on once I'd blow dried my hair, and started down the stairs, still rolling the sleeves back so my hands could stick out. Knowing that if things went badly later that afternoon, I might not have another opportunity to do so, I was glad to be able to sit down for breakfast with Charlie, and I spent extra time cooking up a huge stack of pancakes and a large pan of bacon and sausage for the two of us to share. When he had to leave for work, I struggled not to get choked up and I uncharacteristically jumped up to give him a hug before he walked out the door.

"Bye, Dad. Be safe today. Love you." I mumbled into his chest as he hugged me back.

"You too, Bells. You ok? Something wrong?" He checked, holding me back at arm's length to look me in the eyes.

"I'm good. Just wanted a hug." I was skating carefully around the edges of the truth, still not wanting to lie to him, but obviously unable to share the entire truth with him.

"Well ok then kiddo. See you later." He said, squeezing both my shoulders gently, then walking out to his cruiser. Once he had left, I checked the clock. I was very edgy and nervous and I didn't want to suffer thought the whole day at school like that if I could avoid it. What I _really_ needed was a quick trip to my hollow on the beach, but obviously I didn't have time for that. But if I made sure to set an alarm so that I didn't get lost in my own head, I figured I did have time to sit quietly and centre myself at home. Setting an alarm on my cell to go off just in time to get to school, I sat myself down on the floor with my legs crossed, let my hands fall into my lap and concentrated on my breathing as was now my usual practice.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

I imagined the sound of the waves to match each breath to and I let my body relax, allowing my nervousness to ebb away and replacing it with peace and calm. It seemed like both hours and seconds later when my alarm caught the tiny alert part of my mind and I pulled myself back to awareness, holding my calm around me like a blanket.

As I pulled up in the school parking lot, I caught out of the corner of my eye a quick glimpse of Lauren and a few of her cronies furtively carrying what looked like a rolled up carpet around to the back of the gym and I vaguely wondered what on earth she was up to now. Her nasty little campaign of bullying tactics had been stepped up a gear recently. Ever since she had met me coming out of the bathroom and asked me in a snide voice if I was giving bulimia another try and instead of getting upset like she wanted, I had calmly responded that I couldn't if I wanted to as I had no gag reflex, she had been trying to come up with ways of making me puke in public. It was the desperate act of a spoilt child who wasn't getting her way, but that didn't dissuade her in any way.

Her first attempt was predictably lame; she had one of her little clones sneak ipecac into my soda. Unfortunately for her, I instantly smelt something strange and didn't even take a single sip, just dumped the whole can into the bin.

Her second attempt didn't fare any better, despite it being cleverer. Having worked out which table I always sat at with Jake and Quil (and previously Embry) she switched out the sugar jar for one full of salt. She should've done her research better. Ever since I had been old enough to drink it, I had taken my coffee just like Charlie; black, no sugar, so it was poor Quil who got a mouthful of salty coffee, which he promptly sprayed back out of his mouth, right over one of Lauren's cronies who had been stupid enough to be sitting in the splash zone. All she had achieved that time was a coffee stained, bitching minion, and a free refill for Quil. I had little doubt that whatever she had planned this time would be aimed at me, and I resolved to keep my eyes, ears and nose open for any sign of trouble so I could avoid it once more.

The day passed pretty uneventfully right up to gym class; I had carefully stuck to an apple and bottled water at lunch, pretty much tamper-proof food and drink, though a very light meal, which suited me just fine after such a big breakfast as I'd had that morning, and had kept away from her and her friends as much as possible in the hallways and in class. As I walked to the gym changing rooms however, I noticed an unusually large number of kids milling about by the doors. Paranoid as it might have been, I immediately suspected that it had something to do with me, and that Lauren had planned to make my imminent downfall as public as possible.

I was instantly on guard.

Squeezing my way past the whispering crowd, I went into the changing rooms and walked to my locker. There was a strangely familiar smell lingering which for some reason reminded me of one of my mom's ex-boyfriends, a car salesman. I dropped my bag to the floor by my locker, catching a flash of Lauren and her friends dodging quickly behind the next row of lockers and was about to open my locker when I heard a commotion coming from the doorway. Miss Turner, the guidance councillor was pushing her way through the crowd of kids with Jessica in tow. Walking directly over to me, she put on her 'hey I'm your friend, not your teacher' expression and took a hold of my hand which was just about to click the latch on my locker.

"Bella." She said in a voice that somehow managed to combine sympathy, understanding, judgement, and excitement, "Your friend here came to me out of concern for you. She wasn't telling tales, just rightly worried that if we didn't confront you with proof of your condition, you'd never admit the truth and get the help you need to take care of yourself and your little blessing." I just stood there staring blankly at her, my mouth slightly agape. _"What the fuck is she talking about?" _I wondered._ "Little blessing? She can't mean what I think she means, can she?" _One glance at the carefully arranged expression of understanding and empathy on the councillor's face gave me the answer. _"Yep. That's _exactly_ what she means. She thinks I'm pregnant. But what proof can she possibly think she has, and what does Jessica have to do with it?"_ I looked over to Jessica.

"Erm, Jess. What on earth have you been telling people?" I was trying hard not to be pissed at her. Ever since the day I'd blown up at Lauren and Mike, I'd had a bit more understanding for Jess and the reasons behind her gossiping habit. In fact I'd had a quiet word with her, pointing out gently that being the first to pass on false stories didn't make her appear more intelligent, but in fact did the complete opposite once it was proved to be a bunch of lies. She had seemed to improve since then, but it looked now like she was backsliding.

"Oh I didn't tell _people_." Jess was quick to reassure me. "Just Miss Turner. See when Lauren told me she'd seen your sonogram picture in your locker, and then I saw how you ate at lunch, I realised that you need someone to help you understand how to take care of yourself and your baby so you both stay healthy." She gave me a genuinely understanding smile, squeezing my hand, and I felt strangely touched by her mis-placed concern. She really had been trying to help me, and by the sounds of it, the crowd around the changing room doors wasn't down to her. It was probably the result of a few well placed hints from Lauren and her friends. I squeezed Jess's hand back and turned to Miss Turner.

"We'll it was very kind of Jess to try to look out for me, and of Lauren to tell her about what she thought she saw, but I'm afraid they're both wrong. I'm not pregnant, Miss Turner. There's no sonogram picture in my locker, or anywhere else for that matter. Maybe we should get Lauren over here so that she can see that she was mistaken." I suggested helpfully. I didn't know precisely what she was up to, but I was fairly certain that whatever _it_ was, _it_ was in my locker, and I was determined that she was going to get a share in the treatment. "She's just over there, behind that row of lockers with her friends." I pointed out her location, and Miss Turner, a look of disappointment on her face (whether because she thought I was lying about the pregnancy, or because she wasn't getting her chance to be self-righteously helpful to the pregnant teenager I couldn't say) walked around the corner and came back a moment later towing a very reluctant looking Lauren along by her hand.

"Lauren, dear, I'm sure you were just trying to be helpful, but Bella says you must've been mistaken. Why don't you show us what it was you thought to be a sonogram picture, so we can clear this whole mess up." Miss Turner said kindly, pulling Lauren over to stand in front of my locker.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Miss Turner." Lauren was trying to wriggle out of both the blame and the strangely firm grip the councillor had on her hand, keeping her stood right by my locker door. "Jessica's obviously got the wrong end of the stick again. It's the sort of thing that stupid kids like her do." She failed to notice the hardening expression on Miss Turner's face. The councillor had a soft spot for Jessica, and she was beginning to realise that Lauren might not be the good friend she made herself out to be.

"Oh no, Lauren. I haven't got the wrong end of the stick." Jessica assured the girl she imagined to be her best friend, missing the inference that she was stupid, "it wasn't the stick, the pregnancy test, you told me that you'd seen. It was the sonogram picture, remember? You told me you'd seen the picture and it proved you were telling the truth about her sleeping with all the guys on the Rez, and that I should tell everyone about it and that they'd see the picture too if they looked in the changing room doors at the beginning of our gym class." She reminded Lauren. Then she turned back to me. "But don't worry, Bella. After we talked about how gossiping didn't make me look good that time, I knew that I shouldn't tell everyone, so instead I went to Miss Turner to ask her what I should do. I grinned at her.

"Just the right move, Jess. Thanks. You're a good friend. But really, I'm honestly not pregnant." I old her and looked over to Lauren, who was still trying to get free of Miss Turner's grip and move away from my locker. Miss Turner now had a very grim look on her face as she told Lauren.

"You're staying right here til this is all cleared up, Miss Mallory." And she reached out and opened my locker.

What happened next seemed to happen in slow motion, every detail crystal clear in every hideous detail.

As she opened the door, something large began to fall out. Something with dozens of magic tree air-fresheners taped to it. _"Ah. That's what was reminding me of the car salesman!"_ I somehow had time to think, as the horrible scene played out in front of me. The something was a rotting deer corpse, it's maggot riddled flesh dripping as it toppled out of my locker and fell directly on top of the unfortunate Miss Turner and the much more deserving Lauren. The two of them were knocked to the ground under the stinking body, becoming covered in a mixture of putrefying flesh and wriggling white maggots, and Miss Turner screamed and promptly turned and vomited directly onto Lauren, who in turn puked herself. The sudden cacophony of roaring laughter and screams from everyone in the changing room, and those outside who had managed to manoeuvre themselves into a good position to see through the door was almost deafening. After a lot of struggling, Miss Turner managed to pull herself free from under the revolting, rotting mess and struggled, slipping in the gunk on the floor to her feet. Dragging Lauren up too, she stalked back through the changing room door with Lauren once again in tow and made her way through the crowd, which magically parted as the two passed, giving them a wide corridor to walk through on the way to the principle's office. Figuring Jessica and I would be wanted there too before long, I picked up my bag and grabbed her hand.

"Come on, Jess. We'd better get to the principle's office to help sort all of this out." I told her, and we made our own way out through the still laughing, noisy crowd of kids. _"Well I gave her enough rope, and she's done a hell of a lot better than just hang herself!" _I thought cheerfully as we walked to the office_. "She should be pleased though; she finally managed to make someone puke." _The thought set me off and it was several minutes before I could bring my giggles back under control.

In the end there was quite the crowd gathered in the principle's office. The principle herself of course, me, Jessica, Lauren and Miss Turner, who were standing alone on the other side of he room as the rest of us tried to distance ourselves from the lingering stench, Lauren's parents, and Charlie. Charlie was actually there in an official capacity, to lay charges against Lauren for transporting bio hazardous waste without a permit, though he was ready to play the angry father card if I needed it. I couldn't bring myself to meet his eyes more than once as just in the fleeting second we did catch each other's expression, both of us came perilously close to bursting into uncontrollable laughter. So I kept my head down and kept biting my lower lip between my teeth to keep myself from collapsing in giggles.

Lauren ended up with a three week suspension from school, a huge bill for cleaning the gym changing rooms and the principle's office to get rid of the lingering smell of death, the charge that Charlie had come to lay against her, which would probably result in a large fine at the very least, and also Charlie and I were to discuss between us whether or not to press civil and/or criminal charges of slander against her regarding her spreading the pregnancy rumour again. Personally, I had pretty much decided to go ahead with the charges. I had given her fair warning and she'd failed to heed it. Perhaps seeing her example might warn off some of the other more persistent gossips and put an end to it once and for all.

When we finally got out of the stinking office at about three fifteen, I couldn't drive home and jump in the shower quick enough to suit me. The smell of dead deer seemed to stick to my skin and hair, and I'd never been more relieved to get under the hot spray as I was at that moment. As I showered I reflected on how useful Lauren and her vindictive mission had actually been today. I had been so absorbed in avoiding any traps she might lay that I barely had time to think about what I was planning to do after school. The rotting deer had actually managed to completely drive it out of my head until I had managed to wash the lingering stink out of my hair. I clung firmly to the calm I had pulled around myself that morning, refusing to let the panic that threatened as I remembered what I was about to do to take over. I set myself to simple tasks again. _"Step one: Write a note for Charlie._" I couldn't leave the house that afternoon, knowing there was a chance things might not go the way I'd planned and have Charlie wondering for the rest of his life what had happened to me. I owed him more than that. I planned to keep my cell phone switched on so he could activate the GPS if needed and find whatever was left of me, but he'd need a reason why I'd gone out into the forest. I still wouldn't be able to give him the whole story, for his own safety, but I could give him part of the story, hopefully just enough to keep him safe. I sat down at the desk in my room and began writing.

_"Dad. _

_I'm so, so sorry to leave you like this. _

_It's not something I ever wanted to do, but I need you to understand that I did it to keep you safe. Nothing short of that could __ever__ make me do this to you, I promise, but I love you enough to put your life ahead of mine, so __please__ try to look after yourself now I'm gone. _

_I can't tell you exactly what has been going on, if I did you'd just end up right back in the same danger I'm trying to get you out of. If you really need to know a little of it, talk to Billy. He knows some of it, and tried in his own way to keep me safe. But you know me; ever the stubborn girl. I couldn't or wouldn't listen and as a result I put not just myself, but also you in this danger. So its my responsibility to do what I can to get us both out of it again. _

_Please believe me when I say I'm not leaving this afternoon to try to get myself killed, which is what must've happened if you're reading this. In fact I'm planning on coming home and taking this letter back before you ever see it. But if things don't go according to plan, I need you to know I love you, I've always been proud that I was lucky enough to have you as a dad, and while I wish that some things had turned out different, I've never regretted coming to live with you. Not for a second. It gave me a chance to get to know you better, and to see what an amazing man you really are. _

_Take care of yourself, and please forgive me both for putting us both in danger, and for failing to get myself back out of it again, though by doing what I'm doing now, you shouldn't be troubled by the danger yourself any more. _

_I love you, Daddy. _

_Bella" _

Folding the note in half, I rose, a little unsteadily, to my feet and, wiping the inevitable tears from my eyes, I walked over to Charlie's room to tuck the note under his pillow. If it came to the worst, and I never made it home, he'd eventually find it there and, while I didn't imagine it'd help much, I hoped it might take a little of the pain away.

I took a big, shuddering breath and released it, searching in my mind for the slightly frayed edges of my calm. Once I had control over my tears I went back to my own room and thought on what to do next.

_"Ok. Step two: Get dressed. What do I wear to taunt a revenge obsessed vampire?" _I wondered to myself,_ "Definitely not something of Charlie's. I don't want to mask my scent, or to remind her of his existence if I can help it." _Opening my closet, I stood staring blankly at the contents for a moment. I had been wearing Charlie's shirts for so long that I had forgotten what shirts and sweaters I had of my own. Selecting a crimson red, long sleeved, off the shoulder sweater which would combine warmth with a tempting bare neck to hopefully draw Victoria in, and a pair of black skinny jeans, I got dressed quickly, deciding against using any deodorant, as my own scent should be as pure as possible to catch her attention. I quickly blow dried my hair - I didn't want to freeze outside due to leaving it wet from the shower - and then, perhaps bizarrely, considered make up. I never usually bothered with any at all, and it seemed strange to even consider it, but not only did I refuse to give Victoria the satisfaction of seeing any trace of my recent tears on my face, but also a morbid little corner of my mind insisted that if things went wrong and the wolves didn't show up in time, I'd rather look my best when I died and leave a better looking corpse. I again shook off the panic that threatened at that thought, and stubbornly applied a little mascara and eyeliner just to keep the morbid part of my mind happy.

I was ready.

I went downstairs and pulled on my purple D.M.s, they'd be helpful if I was clambering about in the forest, and opened the door. On the other side, hand raised to knock, and a surprised but pleased smile on his face was Sam.

_"Oh fuck." _I suddenly realised. _"Wednesday, four thirty. Date as in dinner and a movie, not a fruit."_ With everything else that had happened over the last couple of days, the letter from Victoria, and Lauren's backfiring trap, the date, which at any other time wouldve been right there in the front of my mind the whole time, had been completely forgotten. I stood in the doorway, frozen for a few seconds in shock.

"Bella, hi." He said with a grin. "You look great. All ready to go?" I was still stammering, searching for a polite way out of the date as he gently took my elbow in one huge hot hand and led me over to his truck. My treacherous feet followed his lead without my permission.

"Umm. The thing is, Sam, I umm." I didn't know what to say. I couldn't exactly tell him I'd completely forgotten about our date, and had made other plans. _"Oh yeah, Bella. How would that go? Sorry Sam, I forgot all about you, and instead I was planning to go off alone in the forest to try and tempt a psychotic killer to come after me so that I could get a chance to talk to some werewolves. I'd ask if we could reschedule, but there's a chance I might end up the evening lying dead I the forest and I wouldn't want to let you down a second time." I snorted mentally. "Yeah. Perfect. He'd either run away screaming, or call in the little men in white coats." _I stood dithering by his truck, staring blankly at the forest as I wildly cast around in my brain for a solution. Concerned, he leaned down to peer directly into my face.

"Bella? You ok?" His musky, woodsy scent filled my nose and I could suddenly feel the tingly phantom print of the kiss he'd placed on my cheek on Monday. The sensible part of my brain shut down, giving in to my baser nature, helpfully feeding me bits of my sweaty naked sex dream alongside flashes of how Sam looked in the tight black t-shirt and dark blue jeans he was wearing at that moment. It was a little bit like being dazzled by Him, only less overpowering and uncomfortable. _"Holy shit, he smells good." _I noted absently. _"Looks good too. No wonder I've been using him as the guy in my dirty dreams. There's no way I'm gonna get out of this date tonight without either seriously offending him or lying through my teeth. Which he'd totally realise was a lie, and then he'd end up offended anyway."_ I admitted defeat. I'd have to go through with the date tonight, and put off going to find Victoria and the wolves until the following afternoon. _"Shit! The note for Charlie!"_ I realised I'd better run back inside and take it back out from under his pillow. I'd have to hide it until the following day.

"Bella?" The concern on Sam's face was increasing.

"Sorry. I spaced out there for a moment." I apologised. "I just realised I didn't leave my Dad a note to tell him I'd be out with you." It was a half truth, but one I could get away with. "Give me just a moment?" I gave him a small smile and he straightened up with a small, relieved smile of his own.

"Sure." I quickly went back into the house, ran up the stairs and grabbed the note from under Charlie's pillow. Shoving it into my pocket, I half ran, half tripped back down the stairs, narrowly avoiding a serious fall and scribbled a quick note to Charlie which I stuck to the fridge door, then headed back outside. Sam was leaning against his truck, arms folded across his chest, and one foot propped behind him on the front wheel.

"Damn" I whispered under my breath, low enough for him not to hear. "Worth risking an extra day for." I noticed a little smirk on his face, which then turned a bit puzzled and I briefly wondered what he could've been thinking about to bring about both expressions. If he'd been a vampire I would've assumed he'd overheard my whisper, but a human would've had no chance of hearing me so I knew I was safe. As I neared the truck, he opened my door for me, then went round to the driver's side as I climbed in. Once he closed his own door, he took a deep breath and started the engine. He looked a little pained for a moment, and shifted in his seat. I wondered briefly what was wrong, but he seemed to get over it pretty quickly and he aded me a pile of CDs and asked me to pick out what we'd be listening to, then pulled away from my house. _"Must've had a cramp or something." _I guessed, and set my mind to selecting our music. Deciding I needed a bit of a laugh to lighten my mood after the emotional roller coast my day had been so far, I picked a Tenacious D album and slipped it in the stereo.

We passed our drive comparing events of our individual days. After he had told me about his day putting up tiles in the bathroom of what could only be described as a predatory cougar's house, I shared the events of the past few weeks, and Lauren's behaviour to me, to paint a background for him so he'd fully appreciate how what happened with the dead deer came about. We were about halfway to Port Angeles by the time I'd reached Lauren's 'bulimic comment' in the bathroom and my response.

"So I told her that it was impossible or me to be even if I wanted to as I have no gag reflex." I was just about to go on to tell him about how that'd prompted Lauren to try to make me puke in public, but suddenly the truck veered a little towards the central reservation, and a strange sound from his side of he cab made me look up at his face. He seemed to be choking.

"Shit. Are you ok, Sam?" I asked in alarm, grabbing the wheel and steering us back into our lane. "Do you need to pull over?" He seemed to get his breath back and he shook his head a little. He cleared his throat.

"No, no. I'm fine." He assured me. "Sorry about that. I just sorta choked on thin air there." I ave him a sympathetic smile.

"It's ok. It happens." I told him, noting he was once again shifting uncomfortably in his seat. "Must have cramp again." I guessed. "Probably pulled something at work today." As he settled back in his seat once again I shrugged it off and went back to my story. I was just rounding up the part about the dead deer and Lauren's punishments as we pulled into the movie theatre parking lot, Sam howling with laughter at my story, and me giggling along with him. He wiped tears from his eyes as he put the truck into park and turned to face me in the cab.

"You know I haven't laughed that hard in years." He told me. "Thanks, Bella. However the rest of this date goes, that's the most fun I've had in a really really long time." I smiled shyly, not able to keep back the blush that stole over my face.

"Thanks, Sam. I'm having fun too." I told him and he gently squeezed my hand. I looked up into his face and found his dark brown eyes much closer than I'd expected, staring with concentration into mine. The atmosphere in the truck cab seemed to almost crackle with static electricity, and I swallowed a little nervously. The action seemed to break his concentration and he sat back a little, releasing my hand and slapping his toned, muscled thighs lightly.

"Well we'd best get moving or we'll miss the movie." He told me and opened his door. Following his lead I climbed out and met him in front of the truck, and I felt the light touch of his large warm hand in the small of my back, leaving me to the theatre.

"Like I said on Monday, they're showing classics today, so I thought I'd let you pick between the two that are on tonight." He said, throwing me a grin. "Your choice is either '2001: ASpace Odyssey', or 'Monty Python's The Life of Brian'" I shook my head at the eclectic choices.

"We'll I've never really been much of a sci-fi girl, so it's gonna have to be 'The Life of Brian' I guess" I said with a little laugh. "I've never seen it. Is it as funny as 'The Holy Grail?'" His grin grew wider.

"Funnier" he said. "We'd better hurry or we'll miss the start." He lengthened his strides a little and grabbed my hand in his much larger and hotter one to help me keep up.

After buying our tickets - he refused to let me pay, though I did reach for my money in my pocket - we stopped at the concession stand and he bought us some popcorn and a large coke to share while we watched. The screen was packed and we had to squeeze past several people to get o the last pair of seats, right in the middle of the second to back row. As we sat down, he turned almost sideways in his seat, and pushed his legs so they were under one of mine and over the other one.

"Sorry." He said with a rueful grin. "My legs are too long to fit unless I sit like this." Stammering slightly, I told him

"N no. I it's fine." I swallowed nervously, trying to fight back the image from my dream of our legs intertwined like this, only naked. I was glad of the lights going down just then, hiding my burning face. From where he sat on my left I thought I heard a quiet groan, but glancing at him, I couldn't make out enough of his face to tell if something was bothering him. I figured he'd tell me if there was a problem, and set about attempting to watch the film and ignore the hot images that kept slipping through my mind. It wasn't easy. After about ten minutes, the heat from his legs was pouring into my own, raising a light sweat, which of course led o more sweaty, groaning, writhing memories. Sam must've found the cramped seating pretty uncomfortable as he kept shifting around, each time causing his legs to rub against mine, which of course brought on another flashback every time it happened. By the time the film was done, I was more hot and bothered than I could ever remember being in a public place, my panties almost soaked through from my dirty thoughts._ "Holy shit. I'm gonna need to get to the bathroom to mop myself up!"_ I thought. As the lights went up again I turned to Sam and mumbled

"I'm just gonna head to the bathroom. Meet you out front?" He looked a little strung out himself. _"Probably to cramp again from sitting so awkwardly."_ I reasoned. A look of intense relief crossed his face before he schooled it into a polite smile.

"Guess I'll do the same. See you out front then." We both rose and he shoved his hands into his pockets as we followed the crowd out towards the bathrooms and exits.

Several wads of toilet paper later, I stood outside the movie theatre, waiting for Sam to come out when one of my least favourite people pushed through the doors, inanely mis-quoting the movie.

"Oh look, it's Bella. 'Where's _her_ foetus going to gestate?" Mike, clearly-doesn't-understand-what-slander-is Newton said loudly with a snigger.

"She's got it shoved up her box!" One of his friends yelled at the top of his voice, much to the hilarity of the whole group. I felt the anger boiling up inside, and it began to bubble over when Mike added in a smug voice.

"Well as long as she doesn't try to pin it on me. I know how condoms work, you know. It'll turn out to be the spawn of one of her little native fuck buddies." Suddenly the grin dropped off my face, and I realised that towering behind me was the definitely not little (and sadly not my fuck buddy) Sam. He stepped towards Mike, each step forcing the smaller boy to crick his neck further and further back to keep Sam's stormy face in view. Keeping his voice very quiet and even, but perfectly audible to Mikes friends Sam spoke.

"Listen very carefully, little boy." He began, widening his shoulders a bit, causing his intimidating size to be even more noticeable. "I'd be willing to bet that Bella's already told you, but apparently you're too mentally challenged to understand simple instructions, so I'm going to make it crystal clear for you." He poked a single finger into Mike's chest hard enough that it'd probably bruise. "Stop. Spreading. Rumours." He punctuated each word with a hard jab of his finger, making Mike wince. "You will not speak to her, or about her, or about any of her friends of family. Lauren Mallory is already facing criminal and civil charges for her behaviour. I'm sure your mommy would be mad and spank you if you ended up doing the same. And whether she does spank you or not, if I ever" another finger jab "hear that you have said anything" jab "more about Bella, I will be making a personal" jab "painful" jab "visit to you myself. Understood?" Mike nodded his head at a furious speed, rubbing his chest where Sam had poked him. Mike flinched as Sam bent down to whisper in his ear, his large hands clenched and trembling in anger at the spoilt child in front of him. I don't know what it was he said, but whatever it was, caused Mike to pale dramatically and stumble backwards a few paces before retreating with his friends at a very fast walk. I was feeling somewhere between disgruntled and mad, and was trying to work out exactly who i was most mad at and why, when Sam turned round to me, a hangdog expression on his face.

"Sorry, Bella. I know you could've handled it yourself, but if I hadn't have said something to him, I might've had to hit him instead, and I know you wouldn't have wanted me to do that." I was astounded. Not only had he defended me, but he'd then known exactly why I was feeling mad about his, before even I had been able to sort out what I was feeling. I let my anger simmer down. Sam had merely been trying to help, and unlike the occasions when He ad gotten a little overbearing in His protection of me, Sam had realised what he'd done and apologised straight away. I smiled at him a little and held out my hand to him, for the first time initiating physical contact between us.

"It's ok. Just try not to make a habit of it." I told him, trying to appear stern. He smiled back at me. "Or at least not on occasions when I can probably handle it myself." I amended and his smile widened to another of his beautiful grins.

"Yes m'am." He said with a cheeky wink. "So, after that little interlude, shall we get this show back on the road and go eat?" He asked. I nodded. "What do you feel like eating?"

"Anything but Italian please." I replied. Not wanting to run the smallest chance of ending up in the same place I'd eaten with Him that time.

"Ok then." He said, walking off still holding my hand. "Anything but Italian it is then." I let out a little giggle and tried touch up my pace to keep up with him. Of course I instantly tripped, and he aught me by the elbow just as he had that time in the supermarket, stopping me mid-fall.

"Sorry. I forgot how little your legs are." He apologised. I gave a mock snarl.

"Hey!" I pretended to be mad. "My legs are just perfect thank you very much!" He muttered something hat sounded a bit like

"You're not wrong there" but I couldn't be sure of what it was, so I didn't respond. He did slow his pace quite a bit though, and we wandered along at a relaxed pace til we found a promising looking Chinese restaurant. Once we'd both agreed, we headed inside and the hostess sat us at a quiet, private spot near one corner.

Talk over dinner ranged from the movie, to our friends, to the kids at the drop-in centre, to our respective family lives, and we took a long time to finish eating, more interested in the conversation than the food in front of us. I told Sam about Renee and Charlie, and he told me about his mom and the little that he knew about his dad, or Joshua as he insisted on referring to him. I told him about Angela and Ben, and he told me about Paul and Jared. We both steered clear of discussing Embry, aware that the discussion would put a dampener on the mood of the evening. As we waited for our deserts, Sam rather carefully steered the conversation towards dating and what we were both looking to get out of it. I was both relieved and nervous to get this point covered. I didn't want to give him the impression that I wanted a long term, committed relationship, but at the same time, with the rumours that I knew were flying around about me, I didn't want him to think that I was some kind of slut either. With the situation as it stood with Victoria, I was concerned that not only could I not guarantee I'd still be alive and kicking in a month's time, but also I could be painting a target on is back by becoming involved with him in any form, yet the selfish side of my nature didn't want to give up the chance to have more evenings like this one. I didn't know quite what to say or do or he best, so I was relieved when he started the conversation by laying his cards on the table.

"See the thing is, Bella. With all the responsibilities I have in my life right now, I'm just not in a position to be starting a committed relationship. I'm guessing that or you it's probably not on the cards right now either as you'll probably be heading off to college soon?" I nodded, meaning it as encouragement for him to continue, but realising a moment later that he'd taken it as agreement that I was looking into colleges. It didn't matter though. If he believed that was the reason I wasn't wanting anything too serious, then so much the better. I could hardly explain my real reasons. "So would you be maybe interested in going out with me again, and we'll just see where it goes?" He asked. "As long a we're both aware that its not going to end up with us growing old together." He added light heartedly. I grinned at him.

"Yes. I've had fun tonight and I'd like to do it again sometime." I replied and he grinned back. "You know, of course that I had a really bad break-up last time though, so can I just ask one thing?" I asked him seriously.

"Sure." He replied, putting down his drink and giving me his full attention.

"When either one of us wants to call it a day, we just say it straight out. No lies, no drama, and hopefully we can stay friends afterwards." He blew out a breath of relief and another of his beautiful, full beaming grins spread across his face.

"That's pretty much exactly as I'd want it too. I'll drink to that." He raised his glass. "No lies, and no drama." He said as a toast and I echoed it with a smile.

"No lies and no drama." We touched glasses and drank. _"So that's it then. We just see how it goes."_


	24. Chapter 23: First Kisses and Fighting

**I was trying to get everything that happens next into one big chapter as I'd wanted to get back to Sam's POV in the next chapter. But as usual, the characters didn't want to co-operate, and after three days of fiddling with it, and a HUGE chapter of over 10,000 words, and still a fair amount to say, I decided to split it into 2 largish chapters so I had something for you all to read sooner rather than later, and Sam will just have to wait a little longer. I'll try to get the second of these chapters wrapped up tomorrow and post it as soon as I'm done.**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 23: First Kisses and Fighting

It was closing in on ten o'clock by the time we left the restaurant. As we walked back towards the movie theatre where Sam had parked the truck, hand in hand once again, a comfortable silence fell over us. I used it to reflect over the drastic shift my day had taken from my original plan. I'd woken up that morning with no other thought in my head but my plan to go out into the forest to find Victoria and the wolves, instead, I'd somehow managed to derail Lauren's bullying campaign and land myself a casual kinda sorta boyfriend. It was a strange twist, but a satisfying one. Sam and I had played it sensibly and laid out our boundaries right from the start, so I was quite comfortable about what was going on between the two of us. I figured I could keep Sam off Victoria's radar by keeping the time we spent together on the Rez as much as possible - it would be too dangerous for Victoria to spy on me a lot there - and if I could subtly encourage Charlie to visit Billy more often on the Rez too, or Harry Clearwater, I could maybe even delay my confrontation with Victoria in order to contact the wolves for a little while.

I knew I was being selfish in my desire to delay the inevitable, but I figured I could always change my mind again if I couldn't get Charlie spending more time on the Rez with the safety it would provide him. _"Dammit, I deserve a little normal teenage life after all the shit I've been through." _I reasoned._ "And if I keep my eyes and ears open while I'm on the Rez myself, I can get a few clues about who the wolves are without having to resort to my original plan. Maybe I could ask Billy a few carefully casual questions to get some information without raising suspicions."_

My only worries were if I'd be able to keep my side of the 'no drama' agreement I'd just made, and what Jake would say when I told him I was dating Sam. I certainly had no intention of starting any drama that would involve Sam, but realistically, drama seemed to stalk my life whatever I did to try to avoid it. I guessed I'd just have to work hard to keep any drama that did arise away from my arrangement with him and hope for the best.

The Jake issue was a little more problematic. I wasn't naive enough to believe he'd just be happy that I was taking steps to get over _Him_. Despite my open honesty about Jake's chances of a relationship with me, there was sometimes the odd hint that he still had a little crush on me. We had both ignored it, focusing instead on building a strong and close friendship, and I'd hoped that eventually the crush would just die away on its own. The main issue Jake would have with me dating Sam though would not be about the fact that I _was_ dating, but _who_ I was dating. The irritation he, Quil and Embry had all had for Sam and his friends had turned into all out hatred once Embry had "defected" to Sam's side, and I could only hope that our friendship was strong enough to overcome that argument that was bound to happen once I told Jake.

I turned my head to look up at Sam as we walked along. He seemed deep in thought himself, a little crease appearing between his brows as he worked through whatever was going on in his head. I hoped he wasn't changing his mind about our agreement.

"You ok?" I asked his, squeezing his hand a little to get his attention. He blinked a few times, obviously a little startled at being pulled from his thoughts.

"Yeah I'm good." He reassured me. "Sorry. I just got a little side tracked by my own thoughts."

"That's ok." I told him. "I get completely absorbed by my own thoughts too sometimes." He gave a little chuckle.

"Yeah I know." I raised a questioning brow and he explained. "That time I found you on the beach and got freaked out when I couldn't get an answer from you, even when I was yelling right in your face." I reddened at the memory.

"Oh. Right. That was the first time I'd done that." He looked a little confused.

"Done what? Sat on the beach, thinking?"

"No." I laughed. "When I need to quiet my thoughts and balance myself, I sit cross legged, relax my body, focus on my breathing and just sort of let my mind drift free. I find that if I'm not directing my thoughts consciously, but letting them come and go as they please, I can make more sense of things that trouble me. And the peaceful feeling I get after I've spent some time like that lasts for hours, sometimes even days." I rushed on, not wanting to look at him for fear that he'd be looking at me like I was the weirdest thing he'd ever seen. "I can do it anywhere really, but it works best at First Beach." He pulled me gently to a stop. Turning me to face him, he lifted my chin with his fingers to make me meet his gaze.

"That's meditation you're talking about. Going into a meditative state like that is something that religious people and shamans, healers and wise men and women all around the world spend years and years learning to do. And you taught yourself to do it?" I nodded hesitantly.

"Well sort of. I mean I kinda did it by accident the first time. You know, that day you found me?" He nodded, encouraging me to go on. "That's why I thought I'd just fallen asleep. I was _so pissed_ at you for 'waking me up' you know." We both laughed at the memory, beginning to walk down the street again.

"That's so amazing, that you taught yourself to do that. It just shows what a strong mind and spirit you have, to be able to do that, to learn how to put yourself in a meditative trance with no-one to show you." By this point I was completely red in the face, my cheeks clashing horribly with my crimson sweater. I'd never been particularly good at handling compliments, but praise on this level was something I'd never experienced before, and I was becoming a little uncomfortable.

"Thank you." I said politely. "Though I'm not sure I really deserve the praise that much. I needed a way to deal with all the stress and upset I'd been through, and I was lucky enough to stumble across a way to do that. No more, no less." He must've registered the discomfort in my voice, as he let the subject drop, gently squeezing my hand as we wandered along, and turned into the parking lot.

When we got to his truck, he opened the passenger door first for me, but I had already walked between his truck and the car parked close to its right side, so I had to squeeze back through the, now tiny, gap between Sam with the open door, and the neighbouring car. As I pressed past him, Sam caught my elbow and stopped me in my tracks. Searching my face for any signs of discomfort, he slowly began to lean down, gently pressing me back into the parked car behind me_. "Oh shit. This is it. First kiss. Am I ready for this? Do I _really _want this?"_ I asked myself as his face came closer and closer to mine. My nose was filled with his woodsy scent and I could feel my pulse race and my body react just to his proximity_. "Fuck yes I'm ready. I was looking for change, and here it is. And in a seriously hot form too. I'm ready, and fuck do I want this!"_ The thoughts flashed through my mind at lightning speed and when Sam paused, just a fraction of an inch from lip to lip contact, waiting, I guessed, to make sure this was what I wanted; I couldn't stop myself from closing the gap myself and pressing my lips to his. That fizzing, tingling feeling I'd gotten from his kiss on my cheek returned tenfold, but this time on my own lips as the heat from his mouth soaked into mine. His lips were soft, moulding to mine like His had been incapable of doing, but at the same time, still so strong. He inched forward a little more, deepening the kiss and moulding the front of his body against mine as he pressed me more firmly into the car. His hand let go of my elbow and gently ran up my arm, resting for a moment on my shoulder, then slipping around to the back of my neck and ending up cupping the side of my face and spreading round to the back of my head_. "Jeeze his hands are huge!"_ The errant thought flipped through my mind then flew off as fast as it had arrived as his other hand rose to gently rest against the small of my back, between me and the car. His tongue ran slowly and gently across the seam of my lips, a clear request for entry and I didn't even have time to consider that this was further than I'd ever been, before my mouth opened slightly without my conscious command, letting his tongue inside to rub deliciously against my own. I couldn't help the approving moan that left my throat at the wonderful feelings he was causing, and his own quiet but deep groan as my hands moved, one to grip one bicep and the other to circle around his lower back, gave me a thrill of exhilaration. His hand, still cupping my jaw, slid to the back of my head and tangled in my hair.

That was the end of any rational thought or self-control on my part. Instantly, my brain was flooded with images from my dreams of Sam roughly pounding into me from behind, his hair tangled fist pulling my head back, forcing my submission, our sweaty bodies rubbing together in our passion. My grip on him tightened and I pulled him more firmly into me, feeling the unmistakable press of his erection against my stomach, which only served to excite me even more. Heat poured out of his body into mine, both of us letting little moans escape our throats as our kiss went on and on.

"Erm. Excuse me."

One of Sam's thickly muscled thighs slid between my own and I couldn't have resisted the urge to grind myself hard against it if I tried, which of course I didn't. He in turn was gently rocking his lower body, pressing and releasing his rock hard cock against my stomach and letting loose more, louder groans of approval. I copied the movements of his tongue against mine instinctively, not pressing into his mouth, but more than happy to submit to his explorations in mine.

"I said, excuse me!"

Sam's fingers in the small of my back were digging in, pressing almost painfully hard into my skin. I hadn't noticed him passing beneath the bottom of my sweater and up to naked flesh, but I heartily approved at the feel of his burning hand against my skin. My hand dropped lower, of its own volition grabbing a handful of tight, hard, muscular ass and using it to pull his lower body closer still. Our lips moved on and on, our tongues brushing together almost frantically.

"EXCUSE ME!" We broke apart, startled and both of us panting heavily like marathon runners. Slowly turning my head to see the cause of the interruption, I was suddenly brought back down to earth with an almost audible thud. Glaring at us, car keys in hand, was a thoroughly shocked and disgruntled middle aged man.

"If you could bear to tear yourselves away from each other's tonsils for a moment, I'd quite like to get into my car!" The man said with disdain.

I was mortified. Burying my face, which was now easily as crimson as my sweater, into Sam's wide, muscular chest in embarrassment, I mumbled a quick "Sorry" and then pulled myself free of his embrace and scrambled awkwardly into the truck, where I sat, hiding my flaming face in my hands. _"What the fuck was I just doing? What would Charlie have thought of me? Shit! What must _Sam_ think of me? The poor guy tries to give me a simple, end of a first date kiss, and I practically crawl into his mouth and climb his body!"_ I waited what seemed like decades for Sam to walk around the back of his truck and jump into the driver's seat, noting absently the engine roar and squeal of tyres that signalled the middle aged man's exit from the parking lot. When Sam finally did get into the truck cab, we sat there for a few moments in silence, not even looking at each other. I heard him begin to fiddle with his keys and I finally glanced warily across at him. He took in a deep breath through his nose, and then blew it out through his mouth with a tiny, almost missed groan.

"Bella, I'm really, _really_ sorry." He said and my heart plummeted to my guts_. "Oh God. He's regretting it already. Why did I set myself up for more rejection? I knew he was out of my league. Why did I do this to myself?"_ I chastised myself. Taking in my expression, which I can only assume was despairing, he hurried on.

"I'm not sorry about kissing you. Fuck, how could I be? That was the best kiss of my life. But I am sorry for pushing it so far. I swear I didn't plan on it, but I just sorta lost my grip on myself there for a few minutes." He was blushing a bit himself by the end if his speech, but as he had spoken, a tiny smile had begun on my face, which had grown as he continued speaking.

"It was my fault too, Sam." I told him. "I've never been kissed like that before, and I didn't exactly have the firmest grip on my own control." The smile on his face matched mine. I started giggling. "That poor man." I said through my laughter, and Sam began laughing along with me.

"Poor man nothing." He said with a loud snort. "That's probably the most action he's seen in decades." I blushed again at the thought, but my giggling continued uninterrupted as Sam started the truck and pulled out of the parking lot.

On the drive home, he reached out and picked up my hand, winding his fingers between his and laying our joined hands against his thigh. We didn't talk much as he drove; both of us content to listen to the music and make the occasional observation about the band, or the movie we'd watched that evening. It was a comfortable quiet again though, neither one of us felt the urge to fill it with inane chatter. He finally pulled up outside my house at not quite eleven and turned off the engine. Twisting slightly in his seat he said

"Thanks for coming out with me tonight, Bella. I really did have an amazing time." I smiled and squeezed his hand one last time before I disentangled our fingers and pulled my hand free and into my own lap.

"Me too." I told him. "Thank you for a great evening." From the corner of my eye, I saw the porch light flick off for a split second, and then back on again. "Subtle, Dad. Real subtle." I whispered to myself under my breath so Sam wouldn't hear. He must've had a similar thought though as he gave a little snort of amusement.

"I guess that means you'd better head inside." He said, and leaning forward he gave me a lingering, but relatively chaste kiss on the mouth. I kissed him back gently, and then opened the passenger side door.

"I guess so." I agreed. "Night, Sam. Sleep well."

"You too." He told me and, after watching me all the way to my door, he drove away.

I was just putting my hand on the door knob when footsteps on the drive behind me made me turn.

"Sam, Bella? SAM?" Jake whisper yelled at me. "I could understand you dating, I guess, even though you told me you weren't ready, and weren't sure if you ever would be. And I know you aren't interested in me like that. But do you think you could've picked, I don't know, anyone else, other than Sam _fucking_ Uley?" He was so angry his hands were shaking, shuddering so quickly they seemed to blur in front of my eyes.

"Jake, I..." He didn't let me speak.

"No. I'm not interested in your excuses. You know how I feel about that asshole but you go out on a date with him anyway? You kiss him right in front of me?" That was unfair. Neither Sam nor I had known Jake was watching us. That made me think for a second.

"Hang on, Jake. Why _were _you watching us? What are you here for?" I asked him.

"I had a shitty day, so I came by to see my friend, hoping to be cheered up. When Charlie told me you'd left him a note saying you'd gone out on a date with Sam _fucking _Uley I couldn't believe it. I was sure there must've been some mistake, but no. Here you are, back from playing suck face with Sam, I'm-the-king-of-the-Rez_, fucking_ Uley." The shaking was spreading to his arms now. I'd never seen him so angry in my life.

"Will you stop calling him that!" I snapped at him. "Sam's middle name isn't 'fucking'. Just Sam or Sam Uley will do just fine." Jake seemed, if possible, to get angrier still, his face contorting with rage and his whole body shuddering with anger.

"I'll call him whatever the fuck I choose. Fuck this really is just the worst fucking day ever." He began to pace back and forth in front of me. "All my friends and family are defecting to team Uley." He ranted. "First Billy thinks the sun shines out of the guy's ass, then Embry. This afternoon Rachel comes home for a visit, goes out to the beach, then takes one look at Paul _fucking_ Lahote and is all over him like he's made of chocolate or something, and now you. You're the worst of the lot. At least none of the others tried to hide it. But _you_." He turned and snarled at me "Were you ever going to tell me? Or were you just going to sneak around behind my back, laughing at me with your new _boyfriend?_" he sneered the last word in disgust, stepping up close and almost pressing his face directly into mine. The door behind me opened.

"That's more than enough, Jacob. Take a few steps back away from my daughter." Charlie's voice was surprisingly calm, considering Jake's aggressive attitude towards me, but I figured that over the years on the job he'd learned just how to handle aggressive guys. Jake's head snapped up and, quivering all over now, he opened his mouth to snarl a few choice words at Charlie. He didn't get the chance. Charlie squared his stance and rested his hand on the butt of his gun.

"_Now_. If you please, Jake." He insisted, still in that eerily calm, quiet voice. Jake took a few steps back. "Thank you." Charlie said. "Bella, step inside please." He asked me, and I did as he wanted, a little pissed that I wasn't going to get the chance to speak my mind to Jake, but willing to accept that this probably wasn't the time to attempt a conversation with him. Charlie glanced back at Jake, who was still shaking in anger. "I'm going inside now too, kid. You need to go home. Come back when you're feeling better." He stepped back inside and shut the door behind him, turning off the porch light. A weird noise that sounded a little like sheets tearing came through the door, then a little scrabbling, then silence.

Once inside, Charlie dragged in a huge breath and blew it out, leaning back against the door and rubbing both hands across his face. After a couple minutes of silence he dropped his hand and looked up at me.

"So." He said in an even tone, giving me no clues as to his thoughts on the matter, Sam Uley, huh?"

"You too?" I challenged him with a little glare. He held his hands up in defence.

"No, no. Don't get me wrong. I like the guy, he's a good man, and does a lot for his tribe. I've got no problems with you dating him, if that's what you want. I just didn't realise you liked him that way." He paused. "Actually, I didn't know you liked _anyone_ that way. It's really great that you're taking that step back into life, kiddo. I'm proud of how far you've come in such a short time. As long as you're happy with the steps you're taking, and don't feel like you're rushing it, then I'm fine with it. I was wondering though." His voice did hold a little concern now. "Just how serious either of you are about the other." I gave him a confused look and he elaborated. "Sam has a lot on his plate right now, and I'm not sure he's looking for a permanent kind of thing. I wouldn't want to see you hurt again because you're expecting this to turn into a happily ever after kind of deal. On the other hand, if he is more serious about things and you're not ready for that yet, I don't want to see him hurt because you're just looking to rebound from your last relationship." My heart warmed at Charlie once again stepping out of his comfort zone and talking about feelings. Making himself uncomfortable to look out for my well-being and Sam's too.

"It's ok, Dad. We talked about it this evening. Neither one of us is expecting too much from the other. We're just enjoying each other's company and seeing where it goes really. Nothing too heavy or serious." I reassured him. He looked relieved.

"Well ok then. So what about that stuff with Jake? You didn't think it might be a good idea to talk to him about seeing Sam?" He asked me, raising a brow. "I'm not saying you need your friend's permission, but taking him by surprise like that clearly hasn't helped anything." I hung my head.

"I know I've upset him" I said "but I'd didn't know for sure how the date would even go, and if I wasn't going to see Sam again, I didn't want to start an argument with Jake over nothing. And then with everything that happened at school today, I completely forgot about the date until Sam showed up at the door." Charlie chuckled at that.

"Poor Sam." He said. "Don't tell him that part; it would crush his ego to know you'd forgotten about him." I grinned. "Well I think it'd probably be better to give Jake a few days to cool off before you try to talk to him. If I know teenage boys and their tempers, trying to talk to him before he's ready will just make him madder, and the argument will drag on for months." I didn't like the thought of a long drawn out fight, so I nodded in acceptance. I was a little worried though. I needed to encourage Charlie to spend more time at the Rez, and if Jake and I weren't talking, that might make my task harder.

"You won't let our fight interfere with you spending time with Billy though, will you?" I asked. Then I had a sudden brilliant thought. "I think Jake was saying that Rachel's come for a visit. It'd be nice to spend some time getting to know her again, and if you're there too, hanging out with Billy, it'd make it easier for me to do that without it seeming to Jake that I'm replacing him with his sister." To my relief, Charlie nodded in agreement.

"That makes sense." He said "though I should warn you that Rachel is good friends with Leah, who used to date Sam. If you're going to spend time with them, it'd probably be best to tell them straight off that you're seeing him, so that they don't find out from Rez gossip and think you were hiding something." I nodded my agreement once more.

_"Great." _I thought._ "So much for no drama. Not even two hours later and already I've got a livid best friend, and a potential jealous ex-girlfriend to deal with."_ I briefly wondered if the whole thing with Sam was worth it. Maybe I should just stick with the original plan, call things off with Sam, and head out into the woods to find the wolves. Despite the danger, it might prove less trouble for everyone. It would certainly ease the guilt I was already feeling at putting myself first for once instead of doing my usual, selfless thing and acting in everyone else's interest over my own. Then I remembered how much I'd enjoyed my date and _that kiss_. It was definitely worth it, even if it only lasted for a little while. If I couldn't learn anything about the wolves in my time on the Rez or if things with the Victoria situation escalated, then I'd go back to my original plan. But until either or both of those things happened, I'd make the most of the good I'd been handed for once.

"I'm going to get some sleep. Night Dad." I said to Charlie, heading towards the stairs.

"Night kiddo." He replied and he wandered off into the living room where the TV was still playing away to itself.

Another dreamless night's sleep did a lot to convince me I was taking the right path; surely if I was making the wrong choice, Taha Aki would begin plaguing me with a new set of dreams to set me straight. My day at school was relatively uneventful, apart from the fact that I had once again become a minor celebrity amongst my peers, and that Mike Newton was now avoiding me as if even looking at me was going to cost him a limb, and for once the day went past fairly quickly. Normally I would've spent that afternoon hanging out with Jake and Quil, but bearing in mind the fight the night before, I thought it best not to see Jake until he'd had a chance to cool off a little. As I walked out to my truck once school was out, I sent Quil a text, telling him that Jake and I had had a fight, so I wouldn't be joining them at the diner to avoid more issues, and was surprised when he text back immediately. Telling me that Jake was sick and hadn't been at school that day. Not wanting to bother with several texts back and forth to get the details, I called Quil's cell.

"Hey girl. What's going on with you and Jake then?" he asked straight away.

"He flipped out when I got back from a date last night, accused me of hiding the date from him, and when he got right up in my face, my dad made him leave." I gave him the bear bone of the fight, not wanting to re-hash the whole thing.

"A date, huh?" Quil said in a cheeky voice. I could almost see him waggling his eyebrows suggestively. "So who was the date with, Miss Swan? Tell Uncle Quil all about it." I rolled my eyes but couldn't help the little grin he brought on.  
"Yeah, see that'll be the part that Jake was so mad about." I told Quil, not wanting to run the risk of being accused of hiding the truth from him as well. "I was out with Sam Uley." There was a stunned silence on the line for a moment, then a long sigh.  
"Can't say that I'm surprised, Bella. But seriously, I don't think you could've picked anyone more likely to set Jake off. He's been having real problems controlling his temper for a while now, and dating Sam, especially since the Embry thing, was never going to go down well with him. To be honest, I'm really not too impressed with the whole thing myself. You know we hate that guy. But I guess I'm glad you told me yourself, rather than just letting me hear it from the Rez gossips." I was surprised by Quil's calmness. Normally he'd blow up pretty fast when something happened that he didn't like, but he was keeping fairly calm this time.

"Well I would've told Jake myself too, if he'd not been spying on me and seen us kissing goodbye outside my house. I really didn't want to upset him, but you know, I _am _allowed to date who I want. I don't have to have Jake's permission." I was getting a little mad about it again.  
"Hey! Chill would you, girl? I'm not the one who flipped out at you. In fact I think I'm being pretty damn awesome about the whole thing, seeing as I hate Sam almost as much as Jake does!"

"Sorry, Quil" I was immediately contrite. "I didn't mean to yell at you."

"Ahh. Never mind. I'll let you off this time" Quil Joked. "So that's a bit weird, huh? Jake getting in a fight with you last night, and then not being well enough for school today. I called his place a few minutes ago, and Billy told me Jake's got some kind of flu type thing, and he's going to be off school for at least a week." His voice grew a little nervous. "Of course, that's what happened with Embry. Not at school for a week, then when he did come back, he wouldn't hang out with us anymore, and he'd barely talk to us even."

"I'm sure it's nothing like the Embry thing" I told Quil in a reassuring voice.

"Bella, if it is, and Jake stops talking to me too, would you do me a favour and still come hang with me sometimes?" he asked in a sad tone, he was obviously more worried about this than he'd let on. "It'd be pretty lonely without either of them talking to me, and I'd be in serious need of company.

"Of course, Quil." I told him without hesitation. "I'm still sure it'll be nothing like last time, Jake's probably just got flu, like Billy said. But if he does stop talking to you, then I promise, I won't stop hanging out with you. As long as there's no gratuitous Sam bashing whenever we hang out." I added as an afterthought. "Sam will be a totally taboo subject, ok?" he laughed a little as he agreed with me and I was glad I'd managed to lighten his mood a bit.  
"Sure sure, Bella" he said, sounding so much like Jake for a second, that I could've easily believed that Jake had gotten hold of the cell somehow. "I'm gonna go now, ok? I've got homework to avoid and chore to ignore!" I laughed out loud at the typical Quil statement and said goodbye, then hung up and climbed into my truck. I decided I'd head down to my hollow for a little…. Meditation was what Sam had called it, and I guessed that was as good a term as any. I shot off a quick text to Charlie, telling him I was off down the Rez and asking him to check in on Jake when he got to Billy's after his shift at the station finished, then set off for First Beach again.

Sitting in my hollow a couple of hours later, warm and dry despite the usual rain outside of my shelter, I was, as usual, drifting inside my own head, letting thoughts come and go as they pleased. On this particular occasion, the only thoughts that put themselves forward were all relating to Sam, dating in general,_ that kiss_, and just how far I was going to let things go physically with Sam. I was still such an innocent – the night before was the furthest I'd ever gone with anyone – but I couldn't deny, even to myself, that I really enjoyed what we were doing. Well, right up until that man had disturbed us and embarrassed me to melting point. I definitely wanted to more of the same, and I was pretty sure I wanted to do a hell of a lot more. _"If everything goes completely wrong with the whole Victoria thing, do I really want to die a virgin?" _ Maybe the thought was overly melodramatic, and very high school of me, but a little part of me genuinely did feel that way. I'd been completely devoted to_ Him _and probably would've waited for years and year to finally get to make love with him, but despite how hard I'd tried to hold on, eventually I'd had to let _Him _go, and I'd accepted that I'd changed too much now to fit with _Him _again. Hell, once I'd accepted it, I'd gone out of my way to make changes, and now I had the chance to make a very big one. I wouldn't be doing it just for the sake of change. Actually, the fact that I was even thinking about it demonstrated one of the greatest changes I'd made in the last few months. I really, _really_ liked Sam, and if I was going to lose my virginity, I couldn't think of someone I'd rather give it to. _"If it happens, it happens." _I told myself. "W_e said we'd just see how things went, so that's what I'll do."_ I let the matter drop and allowed the thought to drift off, enjoying the calm peace that I floated in.

Once I'd brought myself back to my senses, I pushed my way thought the overhanging roots and headed back up the beach to the Black's place. There had been no-one around at all when I'd parked there earlier – I assumed Jake was probably asleep in bed, but I'd sort of expected to see Billy or Rachel. As I walked to my truck, Charlie pulled up and parked alongside it, jumping out and waving at me. He jogged over to me.

"Billy says to tell you that Jake's not well." He said. Something about his phrasing sounded a little odd, but I couldn't put my finger on just what it was so I let it go. "Rachel and Billy are over at the Clearwater's and they say we're invited to go over there too." I was a little nervous to see Leah Clearwater already, and have to talk to her about dating Sam, but Charlie had been right the night before; it would be better if I told her myself, rather than letting her hear about it through the local gossip. Especially if I wanted to be friends with Rachel. The two of them had always been close, and if Leah hated me, then Rachel would feel honour bound to keep away from me too out of loyalty to her friend.

"Ok then, Dad." I said a little warily, "But if things get tense with Leah, then I'm going to need some help getting out of there before I say something that might make the whole Clearwater family mad." Charlie laughed a little wryly.  
"Yeah, your new way of dealing with confrontation certainly makes an impression on people, Kiddo." He joked as we wandered over to his cruiser and climbed in. I gave a wry snort and we pulled away from the Black's place to make our way over to the Clearwater's.


	25. Chapter 24: Enmity and Eating

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

Chapter 24: Enmity and Eating

When we got to the Clearwater's place, everyone was sitting together on the wrap around porch, Harry his son, Seth, and Paul Lahote taking it in turns to jog out into the rain to tend to the barbeque they had set up out there.

"Hey Charlie, Bella. Good to see you. Pull up a chair and grab yourselves a drink each." Harry called out, gesturing at the cooler Seth was resting his feet on.

"Thanks." I said, and I waved hello to everyone as I grabbed a beer for Charlie and a Coke for me out of the cooler.

Sue Clearwater came out of the house carrying a huge platter of food which she set down on a little table in one corner.

"Now you men let Bella, Rachel, Leah and I pick ourselves some of this out before you demolish it all." She warned the guys with a laugh. I smiled at her and picked out a decent plate of food for myself, Sue, Rachel and Leah doing the same before the men all jumped up to devour the rest. Harry came up from the barbeque, balancing a couple of plates loaded with steaks, burgers and ribs. I took a burger when he offered the plate to me and sat down next to Rachel.

"Hey Rachel. It's been a long time. How's it going?" She looked at me and gave me a tight smile, glancing at Paul quickly. Seeing him smile over at her, then turn to look at me, his smile turning into a mocking sneer, she answered.

"Pretty good, thanks. Sorry, I've just remembered I needed to say something to my dad." She quickly stood up and walked over to Billy, catching his elbow to get his attention and then talking away to him at a fast rate. _"Huh. I don't remember her being this stand-offish." _I thought to myself._ "Maybe she's just a little shy or something."_ I decided I'd try talking to Leah for a bit instead. I wasn't going to launch straight in to telling her about Sam and I dating, but maybe I could get a little friendly conversation out of her, and then gradually turn out talk in the right direction to casually mention who I was dating. I stood and wandered over to her, where she was sitting next to her brother, staring out into the rain.

"Leah?" I said quietly, not wanting to startle her as she looked deep in thought. "Do you mind if I sit with you?" She looked up at me, her face changing from the lost expression she'd had while staring out into nothing to one of contempt.

"Actually yes, I do." She hissed quietly. She obviously didn't want to draw the attention of our parents, but the hostility was clear. _"Oh crap. Looks like gossip moves even faster in La Push than it does in Forks."_ I realised.

"Have I done something to upset you?" I asked her.

"Well I guess that depends on your point of view." She snapped back at me. "If you consider sleeping around with most of Forks and half of La Push, and then setting your claws into the man I'm still in love with, then yes, I guess you have done something to upset me." I was completely at a loss at what to say. I couldn't allow myself to snap back at her; I needed Charlie to be happy spending more time on the Rez, and if he knew I was getting this hostile reception from his friends' kids, he would at the very least avoid spending so much time with them for my sake, and maybe even worse, end up falling out with his friends over the whole thing. I tried to make a polite response to the all-out attack.

"I'm sorry you feel that way. But just so you know, I haven't slept around with anyone in Forks, or in La Push either. Sam and I have only been on one date, but we like each other and plan on spending some more time together. Neither of us is trying to hurt anyone else." I reasoned with her "We're just getting on with our own lives and trying to have some fun. I thought Sam and you split up a couple of years ago now." She seemed to almost swell in her seat, her hands trembling with either upset or anger, I couldn't tell which.

"That's beside the point." She almost growled at me. "We were completely in love and then he just ended it out of the blue for no good reason I could see. Not that my relationship with him is any of _your_ business. Until now he's not dated anyone at all, which _has_ to mean he's still in love with me too. But then you get your whoring claws into him, as you've run out of other options in the area, and suddenly he's 'trying to have some fun'. Well he never needed fun before. He had me." I bit the inside of my mouth, hard, to keep myself from laughing at her accidental self-insult. Laughing right now would clearly be a very bad plan.

"I'm sorry that you're hurt, Leah. I'll keep out of your way, if that will help you, but I've got no intention of stopping seeing Sam unless he tells me that's what he wants , in which case I'd happily stand aside and let you have him. Again, if that's what he wants." I stepped back, turned and walked over to my dad and Harry, who were chatting away off to one side of the main group, not giving Leah a chance to say anything more. The evening wasn't going at all as planned, but then again when did things in my life ever go according to plan?

As I approached, Harry and Charlie hurriedly broke off their conversation and both turned to me with false cheery smiles.

"Hey, Bella. Having fun?" Harry asked me, rubbing the fingers of his left hand with the fingers of his right. It was a gesture I'd noticed him repeat a couple of times already that evening.

"Sure am." I lied with a bright smile. I figured that didn't count as lying to Charlie, as I was actually talking to Harry, not my dad. "Thanks for inviting us over. I've been telling my dad he should spend more time with you and Billy. Maybe you guys could do this sort of thing more often, even if us kids aren't joining in." I hinted. As I'd hoped, he took the bait.

"That sounds like a great idea. What do you say, Charlie? You Billy and I should get together more often, whether it's for a barbeque or just to watch a few games or something." Charlie smiled.

"I'm definitely up for that. Why don't you go suggest it to Billy?" Harry nodded happily, and wandered, rubbing his left upper arm now, over to where Billy was sitting in his wheelchair, talking to Paul. As soon as Harry was out of earshot, Charlie leant down a little to whisper in my ear

"Leah already heard, huh?" I looked up at him in surprise. He'd caught on to the hostility Leah had towards me very quickly.

"Guess that's why you're the chief, Chief." I grumbled. "Nothing gets past you, does it?" he chuckled at me.

"Not a thing, Kiddo" he said. "So Leah's not at all happy with you, and Rachel won't sit still long enough to talk to you as she doesn't want to upset either Leah or Paul, who also has some problem with you. Do you know what his issue is?" I shrugged.

"No. He's had a problem with me from the first time we met, and I can't for the life of me work out why. The only reason I've got any intention of continuing to try to get on with the guy is that he's one of Sam's close friends and I'd rather everything was relaxed and friendly. You have any suggestions?" I asked.

"Sorry, Bells, but this time I'm fresh out of ideas. I _do_ know that you'll get it all fixed up one way or another. You're a smart kid, I'm sure you'll find a way eventually." I nodded glumly. I couldn't agree with him this time and still keep my 'no lying to Charlie' rule. Even if I had the smallest clue what to do about the animosity I was getting from Paul, Leah and, to a tiny extent, Rachel, the chances were that before I had a chance to put any plans in action, I'd run out of time on the Victoria front and have to concentrate on that instead. The thought reminded me of my secondary reason for spending more time on the Rez myself. I looked around. Billy and Harry were talking animatedly about something, and as Charlie left my side and joined them, they began including him in whatever it was they were discussing. Sue was talking in another group with Leah, Rachel and Paul, who was standing just behind Rachel, his chin tucked comfortably on top of her head and his arms wrapped loosely about her upper body. Only Seth was free to talk, sitting, feet once again resting on the cooler, by himself, devouring the enormous plate of food he'd fixed for himself. As I approached him he looked up. I was steeling myself for another hostileglare, but instead I got a friendly smile. He hurriedly swallowed the mouthful he'd been chewing and said

"Hey, Bella. You're looking a little lonely there. Want to come keep me company for a bit?" I smiled gratefully at him, taking the chair next to him in relief.

"Thanks, Seth. I was beginning to feel a little out of place there." I told him. Thinking it would be best to get any rejection that might be coming over and done with, I squared with him straight off. "Your sister's upset with me because I've just started dating Sam. Seth grimaced.

"Yeah she's still really hung up on him, despite the fact that he's made it clear on several occasions that they won't be getting back together. She's not doing either of them any favours by holding out any hope in that direction." Seth seemed like a sensible kid, despite being so young still. I smiled at him sadly.

"It can be very hard to give someone up when you've loved them. Especially if you truly believed it was going to be a forever kind of a deal."

Seth and I chatted together for about twenty minutes about nothing of any real importance, before I was able to carefully and casually inch the conversation around to what I really needed to know. I'd finally managed to get him talking about the old legends, and the wolves when Billy wheeled over just as Seth said

"But the Elders tell us that when the cold ones are near, the fever will set in, and those who have ties to the wolf lines will protect the tribe." Billy accidentally ran over Seth's feet, drawing a loud yelp from the kid.

"Oh shit. Sorry, Seth." Billy was very apologetic. I'd never seen him accidentally roll over someone before; he'd always seemed to have complete awareness and control over his chair, I figure it was just due to the large crowd gathered in the small space. As sorry as I felt for poor Seth's squashed toes, I was even more frustrated at Billy. I was sure that Seth had just been about to mention something important. Something that could've given me a clue. _"Just my luck." _I thought._ "Seth was just about to say something useful and Billy runs him over. What shitty timing for an out of character mistake."_ With Billy joining the conversation, and firmly steering it in a new, and to me far less interesting, direction. I gave up on my mission for the time being. Something Seth had said triggered a fleeting thought. So fleeting in fact that in drifted out of my head before I could pin it down. _"Never mind." _I told myself._ "I'll figure it out later. Either while I'm meditating, or Taha Aki will give me some new dreams to dig around in."_

It was another couple of hours before we left. I knew I wasn't fooling anyone except maybe Seth, but I continued to pretend that I was completely at ease and enjoying myself. I had to prove to Charlie that I could handle the hostility and awkwardness without breaking down, or he'd almost certainly decide not to spend as much time with his friends for my sake. Just before ten, I got a text from Sam, asking me if I was still in La Push. I quickly answered that yes I was still there, although I was expecting to be leaving soon. He invited me to stop by at his place before I headed home, just to say "hi". I smiled to myself. _"At least the evening would hopefully end on a positive that way."_ I reasoned. Wandering over to Charlie, I hinted that I'd like to be getting home soon, and he was happy to start saying his goodbyes to everyone. I thanked Harry and Sue for having me round, said a few words to Seth and then gave a politely distant nod to Rachel, Leah and Paul, then I went to sit in the cruiser and wait for Charlie. He was only a few minutes longer than I was. As we pulled away, heading towards the Black's place to collect my truck I asked him

"Dad, do you mind if I make a quick stop at Sam's on my way home? I won't stay longer than half an hour."

"Sure, Kiddo. As long as you're not late back – it is still a school night after all." I gave him a grateful smile, and when we got to Billy's I jumped out of the cruiser and straight into my truck, giving Charlie a quick wave as I pulled out and turned the truck towards where I knew Sam's house was. I'd not been to his place before, but I knew the general area, and that it was the house right at the top of the hill, so I wasn't worried I'd find it too hard. Sure enough, as I neared the top of the hill, there was only one house up there; a large, single storey cabin which backed directly onto the forest. Sam was sitting out on his porch, a beer in hand, and despite looking very tired, he gave me a big grin as he rose to greet me.

"Hey." He said, leaning down to give me a light kiss on the lips. "Had a good day?" I wasn't really sure how best to answer that. There was no way I was going to lie, but should I give him the whole truth, or would the details of my friend hating him so much we had a screaming row about it, one of his friends disliking me so much that he deliberately made me uncomfortable in front of my dad, and his ex-girlfriend despising me completely count as "drama"? I decided I'd best be open about it, or it would look bad if he heard about it from someone else.

"My day was…. Interesting, I guess." I told him. "I had a row with Jake last night, and this evening I went with Charlie over to the Clearwater's place where I discovered that I'm really not the favourite person of quite a few of the other guests." He gave a small grimace.

"Shit. Did Leah give you a hard time?" he asked, understanding at once who at least one of my antagonists was.

"A little." I admitted. "Paul and Rachel don't seem to be my biggest fans either." I said with a rueful smile. "I can understand Rachel not wanting to be disloyal to her best friend or new boyfriend, but I really can't for the life of me work out what Paul's issue with me is." We walked inside and sat side by side on Sam's couch. "It's not that bad." I hastily assured him, "I can deal with it. Not everyone has to like me. I just wish I knew what I'd done to upset Paul so I can apologise." Sam's face became a little tense and angry.

"Paul has anger issues, Bella. It's probably easiest to just let it go and accept that the two of you just aren't going to get along." I wasn't really happy with that plan, but Paul was Sam's friend, so I had to believe he knew what he was talking about. I nodded in reluctant agreement.

"Well the no drama rule is a little on the frayed side already" I joked. Then seeing him tense up again I continued "but I'm dealing with the animosity just fine, so unless you want to stop thing between us?" I trailed off, not really knowing how to end the sentence. I'd been about to say 'that's fine with me' when I realised that actually, it _wouldn't_ be fine. It would upset me quite a lot to stop seeing him, even this early on in our 'relationship'. _"Careful, Bella" _I reminded myself._ "This isn't supposed to be going anywhere important. You can't afford to actually fall for the guy."_

"NO!" he almost shouted, then blushed and went on in a calmer voice. "No, I don't want to call it off already. I'm looking forward to spending some time with you. He reached into my lap and took hold of my hand, intertwining out fingers and using the fingers of his other hand to gently stroke my knuckles. I smiled up at him.

"Good then." I said. "I'm looking forward to that too." We sat there quietly for a few minutes, just enjoying the quiet and each other's company before Sam spoke again.

"Are you coming to the Drop-in centre tomorrow afternoon?" he asked me. "It's tutoring night, but I'm sure I can arrange it so that you don't have to deal with Paul.

"Yeah I'll be there. Actually, I was going to give you something to give to Paul." I suddenly remembered. "It's in my truck. I'll grab it out just before I leave." At Sam's quizzical look I continued. "It's just a few leaflets about dyslexia and the problems it can cause with school, as well as the information for a testing centre he could go to if he wanted and find out if dyslexia is what's holding him back. I figured it would go over a lot better if it was coming from you and not me." He chuckled a little.

"You're not wrong there. He'd get all defensive and proud if you gave him the literature, and then just throw the lot of it out instead of looking at it." That was about what I'd thought, so I wasn't surprised. "I think you're probably right though. I'll pass the stuff on to him." Smiling, I leant into his side, enjoying the warmth that poured into my body from his. He let go of my hand and slid his arm around my shoulders, pulling me in tighter. I sighed happily, feeling a little of the tension form the evening at the Clearwater's leaving me.

"This was just what I needed after this evening, thanks Sam." I murmured, pressing my cheek into his broad chest. He bent a little and kissed the top of my head, resting his face I my hair and staying like that or a few moments, just breathing.

"Yeah. Me too." He whispered. I lifted my face to look at him and he bent that little bit lower to give me a soft kiss. The tingling returned to my lips and I pressed mine harder against his as he made a quiet sound of approval. When I started to part my mouth a little, inviting his tongue to enter however, he pulled back with a regretful expression.

"We don't have long before Charlie will be expecting you home." He said. "If we let this kiss go the way the last one did, I don't think I'd be able to let you go for a few hours at least." Though I knew he was right I pouted at him, pulling my lower lip right out. Sam just gave a little laugh and gently flicked at my lower lip.

"If you'd like, we could hang out here after the drop-in centre tomorrow, watch a movie or something?" He offered. "I don't have much food in right now, but we could always order pizza."

"Or I could cook, if you don't mind me rummaging around in your kitchen?" I ventured. His eyes lit up.

"Do you think you could make some more of your amazing lasagne?" He asked eagerly. "I've never tasted anything as good as that." I laughed.

"Sure. I've got to stop in at the Rez shop for groceries anyway. I'll pick up why I need while I'm there. You want me to make a really big one so you can freeze a few portions?" The grin on his face widened.

"You serious?" he asked "Hell yeah. Yes, please. I'd have to keep it hidden from Jared whenever he comes by – I honestly think he'd fight me for it if he knew I had some, but that'd be really great!" He gave me a hug. "I knew there was a reason I was keeping you around." I laughed again.

"Well I do still owe you two favours apparently, so I guess now we're down to one?" I asked

"Oh no you don't. That doesn't count as one of the two – you're going to be eating with me so you can't use that as a payoff." I pouted once again.

"But then how am I ever going to get square with you?" I asked playfully.

"I'll think of something" he told me, pulling me in tight against his body. His voice grew low and husky, almost a growl. "After all." He said "I wouldn't want you to be in debt to me now, would I?" I swallowed, suddenly dry mouthed due to his proximity and the lust that I could clearly see in his eyes. He moved in for a kiss and at the last second I turned my head so he caught me on my cheek.

"Now, now." I said "I've got to be going, remember. He groaned in frustration and I hid my smile. I was catching on quite quickly to this flirty teasing thing. Giving him a quick peck on the lips, I stood and walked towards the door.  
"I'll see you at the drop-in centre tomorrow then?"

"Sure. Tomorrow." He answered, standing himself to walk me out to my truck. After one last little kiss I climbed in and, with a little wave, drove home.

That night, Taha Aki appeared as usual in my steamy sex dream. The naked sweaty me was moaning and screaming as usual, but this time Sam's name could occasionally be heard, as well as his voice calling out my name in return. I figured it was to be expected after the date, _that kiss _and the flirty teasing we'd been indulged in at Sam's place, but I was even more uncomfortable than ever at having Taha Aki there to witness the scene. I was actually glad this time when he gestured me towards the window and told me to "Watch".

I did as he asked and out of the window I once again saw a group of wolves lying and sitting around, seemingly on guard outside. This time, the silvery grey, the brown and the newer, grey with black spots wolves were watching the forest with what I could only describe as expectation, and when a new, russet coloured wolf walked out of the trees to join them, I wasn't at all surprised. I turned to Taha Aki.

"So I was thinking about the meaning behind the wolves outside. I knew there were at least two, from the letter that Victoria left me, but there has to be a reason for you showing me this group of wolves here. Does each one of these represent one of the tribe's current protectors?" He nodded at me, a surprised but proud expression on his face.

"Right." He said, and the feeling I had come to refer to as the _right_ feeling washed over me. It was my turn to be surprised.

"Hey I know that feeling!" I said. "Has that been _you_ this whole time – giving me that feeling so I knew when I was on the right track?" He nodded with an amused smile.

"It seemed that you needed the encouragement to see the correct path, Young One." He told me. "Though you have clearly made some progress yourself, without my help. You are learning to both look and _see, _although there are still some things you refuse to accept, despite them being right in front of you." He chided me. I didn't bother to ask – he wouldn't tell me. I was supposed to learn things for myself in order to understand them completely. That little niggle I'd felt in the back of my head while talking to Seth earlier tickled at me again, but it floated away before I could turn my attention to it. I sighed with frustration and moved away from the window, and the scene shifted.

I was back in La Push again, only for once there was no screaming. No blood and death and destruction. It was a simple, everyday scene, set in modern times. Had I not known for a fact that I was dreaming, I could easily have mistaken the scene for reality. My eye was drawn to a middle aged man, walking towards the forest edge. At a slight tug on my elbow from Taha Aki, the two of us followed the other man as he wandered, apparently aimlessly through the trees. Eventually he stopped and bent down, checking a trap on the forest floor before rising and heading off again in a new direction, rubbing one hand against the other in a strangely familiar gesture. I couldn't put my finger on where I'd seen the gesture before, but it felt important that I work it out. As we followed, I noticed his gait become a little unsteady and slow, his right hand gripping his upper left arm and then, with no warning he stopped in his tracks, and collapsed to the ground, his hand grabbing at his chest. Unable to do anything but watch, I saw him grow pale and die right there amongst the dead leaves and mud. The scene reset. I saw me/not me talking to the same middle aged man, apparently attempting to get him to return to the house. At first the man merely shrugged and laughed, but as me/not me continued to try to convince him, he began to grow angry and stormed off in the direction of the forest only. His death was only different in that he didn't make it so far into the forest this time. I guessed his anger had brought things on quicker. Again the scene reset and I watched as me/not me attempted to convince the man's wife and daughter to keep him home. This time all that was achieved was angering the two women. The man still went into the forest alone, and still died there. Finally, I saw me/not me accompanying the man into the forest. Then, with a weird feeling, like the whole world flashing past, I saw the same man, now between five and ten years older, judging by his appearance, dying peacefully in his bed, surrounded by his family.

The first thought that struck me as I woke the next morning was _"Now what the fuck was _that _all about?" _I' become used to the dream scenes featuring Taha Aki, but I'd come to expect them to have some important relevance to the Victoria situation, or at least to the wolves. This latest dream seemed to have nothing to do with either. For a second I was tempted to consider the thought that it was just an extremely random but "normal" dream, but the presence of Taha Aki ruled that assumption out. I'd need to give it some more thought.

School seemed to drag by in a mind numbing blur that day. I was looking forward to spending some more time with Sam, and of course as I wanted time to go faster, it perversely slowed right down, every minute feeling days long. When the final bell went, I was out of my seat and nearly to the door before anyone else had even reacted, let alone stood up. Waving a quick goodbye to Angela and Ben, and nodding at Angela's "call me" hand signal, I rushed through the halls towards the exit, and managed to get to my truck, only tripping three or four times in my haste, before anyone else had even reached the parking lot. I headed straight for the Rez, grocery list tucked in my pocket, and took my time wandering around the aisles looking for the best ingredients I could find for the lasagne. It dismayed me a little just how enthusiastic I was about cooking in Sam's kitchen for just the two of us. _"Yeah. _That's_ taking it slow, and not taking it too seriously alright, Bella." _I thought to myself sarcastically. _"Nothing says 'casual, not too deep, dating' like bustling about like a fussy housewife, trying to find the very best ingredients to cook for her man." _It was definitely a concern. Despite all my best intentions, there I was, only a couple of daysin, and I was catching myself getting attached to Sam in a way I'd told him, Charlie and myself that I wouldn't do. I firmly reminded myself of the warning I'd given myself the night before – I couldn't afford to actually fall for this guy. I needed to keep thing light and fun, not serious.

I picked up everything on my list, and made my way to the check-out, smiling as usual to the lady on the till. She smiled back and took up our conversation where we'd left off the last time I was in the store. It had become our usual pattern over the last few weeks.

"So has that girl tried anything new at school, Bella?" she asked me. I nodded my head with a grin."Yep." I said, popping the 'p', and I filled her in on a cliff's notes version of the whole "rotting deer in the gym locker" incident. By the time I got to the end, the pair of us were folded over laughing. It was funny how well the two of us got on, bearing in mind that the only time I ever saw her was when I came into the Rez shop for groceries, but when she'd realised who I was the first time I came in, and asked why I'd made the trek over to the Rez to shop, rather than using the Forks supermarket, we'd bonded over our shared loathing of small town gossips and the damage they can do. I hadn't inquired about the specifics, but she'd briefly mentioned that gossip had done a lot of damage to her and her son's life several years ago, and I felt a certain kinship with her. Slowly but steadily, a new friendship was building there. I paid, and gathered up my bags.

"Bye, Allison." I smiled. "Catch you soon with the latest instalment of the the life and trials of Bella Swan!" She laughed and waved.

"See you soon, Bella honey." I walked out to the truck.

Planning ahead, I'd put a cooler in the back of the truck before school to make sure that none of the groceries would go off while I was putting in my time at the drop-in centre, so I packed the food away, and drove off to get started on the tutoring. True to his word, Sam made sure I wasn't paired with Paul – he'd sat Paul down with himself – and instead I was helping a pair of 9th graders called Collin and Brady. They were good kids – a little cheeky and full of themselves, but pretty smart. They just had a little trouble grasping the math they'd been assigned and were taking the opportunity to get a little help. They were both quite tall for their age, and pretty well filled out too. _"Jeeze, is there something in the water here on the Rez?" _I wondered to myself. _"Sam, Jared, Paul, Jake, Quil, Embry, even Seth and these two…. Shit it's like all the guys I know around here are just _huge." I guessed there were some seriously good genes in the tribe to produce all these tall, well-muscled, good looking guys. I helped Collin and Brady work their way through their math assignment, ignoring their terrible attempts at flirting, and was still helping Brady draw up a graph when Sam came over.

"She's not working you guys too hard, is she?" he asked the boys with a grin.

"Nah, we're cool." Collin replied

"She can work me as hard as she wants." Brady said cheekily, giving me a little smirk. Sam gave him a light tap on the back of the head.

"Watch yourself there, kid. I don't want to have to hurt you." Sam closed the last few steps to stand directly behind me, putting both his hands on my shoulders and leaning down to plant a kiss on the top of my head. From the table the two of them had been working on over in the corner, Paul gave a disgusted snort of derision. I looked up in time to see Sam shoot him an angry, warning look. Paul scowled and, picking up his books, stalked out of the room.

"Oh. Sorry, Sam. I didn't know she was spoken for." Brady apologised to Sam, looking a little nervous at having upset the guy he clearly idolised.

"Well now you do, so try not to drool all over poor Bella" Sam replied, despite the fact that we'd not actually officially declared ourselves as exclusive. Although a part of me thought I should be mad at Sam for getting territorial, I had to admit to myself that I kind of liked it. For one, it was nice to be wanted, especially by someone as hot as Sam, and for another, well a certain amount of jealousy was kind of hot. _"I guess that kinky little submissive side I discovered when I started having the sex dreams is rearing its naughty little head again." _I noted, blushing a little, while at the same time, noticing a slight dampening in my panties. Sam cleared his throat loudly, shoving his hands roughly into his pockets.

"Well anyway, It's time to start wrapping things up now. Can you boys manage the assignment yourselves from here?" He asked them, and when they nodded cheerfully he told them. "Ok then. So you wanna grab up your stuff then? Bella and I need to lock up here and she's promised me some more of her famous lasagne. We all heard his stomach growl loudly. "And as you can hear, I'm one hungry guy!" We all laughed lightly, and the boys started collecting up their books. Sam had walked down to the Drop-in centre, so I gave him a ride in the truck back to his place. On the way he told me about how he'd given Paul the literature on dyslexia that I'd left for him.

"He was a little defensive about it at first." Sam told me "but after I'd pointed out that dyslexia had nothing at all to do with IQ, but was just about how your brain was wired, he started listening. I think he's going to discuss it with his school guidance councillor next week." I was pleased that I might have helped Paul out a little, Even if Paul never knew the help had come from me, it didn't matter. What mattered was Paul finding the source of his problems and maybe finding a solution to some of them.

When we got to Sam's he reached into the back of the truck and picked up the cooler without me having to ask, carrying it in one hand and slinging the other arm around my shoulder.

"I've got a few different movies to pick from." He said, dropping his arm from round my shoulders to unlock and open the door. Gesturing for me to go on in ahead of him, he continued. "As I know you like Monty Python, I picked up 'The Holy Grail', 'The Meaning of Life' and 'Time Bandits', and then just in case you'd had enough of Python for a while, I also picked up 'The Shawshank Redemption' and 'The Sweetest Thing'. I figured that was a good round selection." He picked up the stack of DVDs and offered them to me so I could make my choice.

"Do we have to watch just one, or can I pick out a couple?" I asked him. I'd not seen 'The Meaning of Life' or 'Time Bandits' but all the others were films I'd really enjoyed and I was going to find it hard to pick out just one to watch. He looked pleased.

"If you don't have to be rushing off this evening, I'm happy to watch as many of them as you like." He said. "Do you have a curfew on weekends?" I shook my head.

"No. Charlie's pretty cool as long as I let him know where I am and let him know what sort of time I aim to be back." I told him. "On the weekends anyway. He's a bit tougher on school nights." Sam put the stack of DVDs down on the couch and rubbed his hands together in anticipation.

"Great. Then it's entirely up to you. I'd be happy to keep you up all night." At my immediate blush, he quickly added. "To watch movies, I meant. Not anything to do with sex….. Not that I wouldn't be happy to keep you up all night with sex, but…I …we….you…it" He finally trailed off, blushing almost as much as me. "Sorry. Just ignore all that rambling, would you?" he asked and took a breath. "What I _meant _to say was, I'd be really happy if we sat up all night watching movies, or talking, or pretty much anything. I'd really enjoy your company." I found his flustered awkwardness endearing, and I couldn't honestly say I was upset he'd had even a fleeting thought about keeping me up all night with sex. I wasn't quite ready for that step just yet, but I was definitely interested in _becoming_ ready.

"What rambling?" I asked, letting him off the hook. "I didn't notice any rambling." We both laughed.

"So how about I get the dinner started off cooking, and we watch 'Time Bandits while the lasagne is cooking?" I suggested. He was happy to take the change of subjects and nodded, bending to pick up the correct DVD.

"Do you want any help in the kitchen?" He asked me

"No, I'll be fine. I might need to ask where you keep things every so often, but other than that, just some company while I cook, so we can chat would be great."

Once I'd got the hang of where everything was in Sam's kitchen, I found it pretty easy to get into my usual rhythm with the chopping, browning and stirring, and I enjoyed having someone in the kitchen with me to talk to. Sam only made the mistake of trying to nab a taste while I had my back turned. I caught him without even turning around, just knowing that he was reaching towards the pile of chopped mushrooms I had sitting on the chopping board, waiting to be added to the tomato sauce.

"I'd stop right there, before I got a hot, sauce covered spoon slapped across the back of my hand if I were you." I told him without bothering to even turn my head. I could hear the surprise in his voice.

"Are you serious?" he asked

"Does a bear shit in the woods?" I responded, holding back my laughter. He didn't bother holding back his own. It burst out of him in a surprised burst.

"My mom says that one too." He told me between chuckles.

"Sounds like a sensible woman." I grinned over my shoulder at him. After adding the mushrooms to the sauce I said "The sauce need to simmer for a while, so if you don't mind pausing it again in a while when I have to build the lasagne, we can start the first film now.

We sat on his huge, comfy couch, and as the film started, Sam pulled me over to sit on his lap. I looked up at his face, startled at the sudden move. He gave me a warm smile.

"This ok?" he asked. I nodded, my mouth too dry all of a sudden to answer. My mouth was the only thing that was dry; his unexpected, gentle but forceful move had once again sparked that little, unexplored part of me that clearly appreciated being in a submissive position and my panties dampened once more. I wriggled a little on his lap, trying to get a little friction where I most needed it, and felt under my ass his erection trapped in his cut-offs. He gave a small moan as I rubbed against him and I quickly froze my movements.

"Sorry." We both spoke at the same time and he gave a little chuckle.

"Maybe I shouldn't have done that; it's gonna be kind of _hard_ to concentrate on the movie now." I snorted in amusement despite my blush.

"I'm sure we can _handle_ it." I answered with a raised brow. It was his turn to give a snort.

"If you insist." He said, and he leant back against the back of the couch and made his face pleasantly blank, turning his face towards the TV screen. "We'll see." He added. A little disgruntled, I went to slide off his lap. He clearly thought I'd break before he did. _"Screw that." _I thought. _"He thinks I'll break first? 'We'll see' indeed!" _ Sam's arms firmed around me, a gentle but iron tough cage round my waist keeping me from leaving his lap. _"Huh. So that's how he's going to play it then? Ok. Well two can play at that game." _I cleared my own face of expression and stopped trying to leave his lap, instead wriggling more firmly back into his hard on, deliberately teasing him against my ass. It cost me a little of my own composure – the heat and dampness between my thighs increasing once more- but it was worth it to hear his quiet groan which slipped out from between his clenched teeth. I looked up innocently.

"You ok?" I fluttered my eyelashes a bit and fought against the smile that was trying to break out on my face.

"Just fine, thanks." He ground out through his clenched jaw, and I had to fight a little harder to hold back my smile. I turned back to the screen and attempted to combine concentrating on the move with an occasional, well timed wriggle of my ass whenever I felt his hard on soften a little. After about the fifth time I'd pulled this little trick, his hands dropped to my hips and when I tried it next, his hands suddenly firmed, holding my lower body completely still against him. As frustrating as it was to have my movement restricted like that, that little submissive part of my mind clearly liked it and I felt another rush of heat and damp to my core. I let out a tiny moan against my will and was pleased to hear it echoed by Sam. His grip lessened for a fraction of a second and I quickly shifted my hips, rubbing against him and providing myself with a little friction the same time. I didn't allow my expression or my attention on the screen to waver for a second. He threw his head back against the couch cushions and muttered.

"For fuck's sake, you've got to be kidding me." I finally turned to face him.

"Shhhh. I can't hear what they're saying." I said, gesturing at the TV and pretending to be disgruntled. He let out a low sound I could only describe as a growl and began leaning in towards me, clearly giving in and moving in for a kiss. I quickly pulled back, and struggled out of his lap to stand up in front of him. He looked up, confusion, frustration and concern on his face.

"Time to build the lasagne." I said with a cheeky grin, and when he flopped back against the cushions I gave an all-out laugh and headed for the kitchen, brushing my thighs together with unnecessary force as I walked to try to relieve some of my own tension. I heard him get up from the couch a few minutes later and head off to the bathroom and grinned to myself. I was surprised and pleased that despite my lack of experience in the area, I'd managed to get him so riled up. Before long, Sam joined me in the kitchen. I looked up at him with a grin.

"Better now?" I asked cheekily. He shook his head ruefully.

"You, woman, are a health hazard, you know that?" My grin widened.

"Well thank you, I'm taking that as a compliment." I said

"Oh it was." He assured me. He hopped up onto the counter next to where I was working, layering up the lasagne "Can we call a truce for now? Much as I'm enjoying myself, it'd be nice to calm down and relax a little." He asked. "Well at least for a while, anyway." He gave me an evil little smile and I gulped. I could see in his eyes that he was going to step up his game in the next round, and I wondered if I'd be able to handle it after-all. I wasn't sure I was actually ready to sleep with him, despite how horny he was making me, and I briefly wondered if in my inexperience I'd pushed things too far and led him to expect more than I was willing to offer.

"Ok, a truce it is." I answered. I hoped that with a change of pace, I'd be able to back track a little on any unspoken promises I might've inadvertently given.

The lasagne placed in the oven, Sam and I wandered back into the sitting room to watch more of the movie. This time he didn't pull me into his lap, which I was both pleased and sadden by, but instead he wrapped his arm around my waist and let me settle into his side, my head resting on his firm, muscly chest. Beneath my ear I could hear the slow and steady beat of his heart and I let it sooth me almost into a meditative state like the ocean sounds, but I kept hold of my awareness, not wanting to miss any of the evening in his company.

I was incredibly relaxed and comfortable by the time the movie had finished and it was a bit of a chore to pull myself to my feet and go get our dinner served up. We ate together on the couch, watching the next movie and when we'd finished eating, Sam just took our plates and put them on the floor, swinging his legs round and then lifting me up as easily as if I was a pillow, then arranged us both on the couch in a sort of spoons position, his back pressed against the cushions of the huge comfy couch and mine pressed against the front of his body, my head resting on one of his giant upper arms. The position was so comfortable and I felt so at ease with him that I found myself drifting off as the movie wound to a close.

I don't know how long I dozed, snuggled up in the heat of Sam's embrace, but I suddenly sat upright, realising I'd forgotten something important.

"Charlie!" I gasped. I'd fallen asleep without letting him know what time I'd be back. I wasn't sure what the time was, but I had a feeling it was too late to keep him from worrying and probably being pretty pissed at me. I made a grab for my cell, waking Sam who'd fallen asleep with me.

"Wassa matter?" I slurred sleepily.

"I didn't let my dad know when I'd be back, and I'm…" I looked at the time on my cell, nearly two AM. "nearly two hours later than I'd said I'd probably be."

"It's ok." Sam told me, sitting up and putting his hand over mine on my cell. "When you drifted off I texted him and told him you'd fallen asleep on the couch. He said not to wake you as he was planning on staying at Billy's for the night anyway to get an early start fishing tomorrow." Sam rubbed my shoulders reassuringly. "You can take my bed if you want, and I'll sleep out here." Pulling me up from the couch, he led me to his room, where a massive bed took up most of the space. As sleepy as I was, it looked very inviting and I toed off my shoes and flopped straight down on top of the covers. Chuckling at me, Sam lifted my legs and pulled the covers back, tucking my legs beneath them and pulling them up to my chin. He leaned down and kissed me gently, squeezing one of my hands.

"Night, Bella." He said, and turned to leave the room. I didn't let go of his hand. As he reached the full stretch of my arm, I tugged him back gently.

"Stay with me?" I asked him. "I was so warm and comfortable wrapped up in you on the couch. Will you come hold me like that now too?" He looked torn for a second, but then made his decision. Walking back to the bed, he sat down and the edge and crawled under the covers with me, turning me onto my side and tucking my back up against his front in much the same position as we'd been in on the couch.

"None of your funny business now, Miss Swan." He teased. "It seems we could both use some sleep as we drifted off before the second movie even finished. I gave a sleep giggle and agreed.

"Promise." I said and was already fighting the dropping of my eyelids. I felt so warm and safe tucked up in his arms, I dozed off again almost immediately with a peaceful smile on my face.


	26. Chapter 25: Thoughts and Theories

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 25: Thoughts and Theories

Sam POV

My first task on leaving the hospital was to talk to Charlie about Paul's theory. Not only was he a sensible enough man that he'd realise immediately the extra danger having a vampire gunning for specifically would put Bella in, but also he was so observant that he'd notice the extra surveillance I was planning on putting on him in a heartbeat and start asking questions. It was easier for everyone if I was completely open with him on the issue. I drove straight over to the police station in Forks and found him sitting, well slumped really, in front of a pile of paperwork in his office. I tapped lightly on his open door.

"Charlie. You got a few minutes?" I asked him. He looked up at me. The poor guy looked completely exhausted, his face and uniform rumpled, his skin grey and huge bruise-like bags under his eyes. I figured working a shift, then sitting up all night with an injured daughter, then working another shift with only a couple of hours sleep in between would do that to a guy.

"Hey, Sam." He said. "I guess that depends; were you planning on telling me whatever it was you were withholding when I caught up with you at the hospital yesterday?" I had been right. Even as exhausted as he was, he hadn't missed a thing, and was already asking questions. I nodded.

"Yeah I was. Sorry I didn't tell you yesterday, I figured you had enough on your plate to worry about and it could wait til you knew Bella was going to be ok." He gave me a weak smile.

"I guess I should thank you then." He said, then sitting up straight and squaring his shoulders he asked. "Ok. So what is it then?" I walked in and sat down across the desk from him.

"Paul ran a theory by me the other day and the more I think on it, the more I think he might have a point." I began, not really seeing any point to beating around the bush. Charlie raised a tired eyebrow in question, so I continued. "He thinks that maybe after the first missing person, the vamp caught your scent and took a liking to it, and ever since she's been trying to get her fangs into you. He also thinks" I added quickly, before Charlie could interrupt me "that maybe that's why she's been taking so many hikers and campers, more than she could possibly _need _to keep herself satisfied; she's trying to lure you out so she can grab you." I finished and sat back, waiting to see how he's react. I wasn't worried that he'd panic, it just wasn't in his nature, but I had been expecting more of a reaction than I got. As it was, all he did was sit back himself, rubbing at his face with one hand. There was silence for a few minutes while he processed what I'd just said.  
"Ok. I can see how that theory holds some water." He finally said calmly, "But I do have a couple of questions. First off, didn't you say that the vampire kept saying she wanted what she was owed? How could that be me? How could I be something that she's owed?" It was a good point, and not one that occurred to me. "Second." Charlie continued, "I'm pretty sure that's not everything, and you know I don't need you holding out on me, so what's the rest of it?" I smiled wryly at him, _"never misses a thing, even when he's so tired he can barely see straight." _I thought to myself. I took a deep breath and just said it straight out, figuring it was like ripping off a Band-Aid. "I caught the scent of the leach when I found Bella and Jake yesterday. Jared thinks she probably caught your scent on the shirt and hoodie that Bella was wearing, and that does make sense to me." Charlie froze in his seat. _"Figures that the biggest reaction I get is when he knows Bella might be in danger."_ I gave a mental snort, although to be honest, I'd had a similar reaction to the idea of her being in harm's way myself.

"How close did the vampire get to her?" he asked.

"Close enough that her concussed mind thought the leach's red hair was flames in the trees." I answered soberly; my skin was crawling at the thought of the bloodsucker getting that close. If I hadn't decided to follow Jake and Bella, things might've turned out very differently. _"Of course with a vamp right on top of him, Jake probably would've phased instantly."_ A small part of my mind reasoned. _"He's been right on the brink for days now; it could happen at any moment."_ I shook off the thought for the time being. I had other issues to tackle and there was no point borrowing extra trouble.

"Shit." Charlie breathed, rubbing both hands over his face this time. "That was seriously close then. Thank you, Sam. You're probably the only reason she's still with us right now." I blushed a tiny bit, shifting my shoulders awkwardly at the praise in his voice. I couldn't ever remember having any true fatherly interaction, even when Jonah had still been in town, and as much as I liked the warm feeling that washed over me, a part of me still found it uncomfortable.

"Actually, Charlie, I was just thinking that if the leech had attacked, Jake probably would've phased on the spot. He's due any time." Charlie nodded little

"You might be right, but that doesn't mean he would've phased in time, or even that he would've been able to protect Bells; not without any training whatsoever." He was probably right there too. I shrugged my shoulders.

"Well luckily we didn't have to find out." I said. "And if we can get the two of you Swans hanging out on the Rez even more than you already were, maybe we never will have to." He looked at me, considering something, but his face wasn't giving anything away.

"I guess I can hang out with Billy and Harry a bit more often. They'll both get why, but I'll have to come up with some good excuses for Bella or she'll smell a rat." He said and I nodded.

"Yes she takes after her old man that way." I chuckled and he joined in after a moment. "She's very observant."

"She is." He agreed. "So we'll have to play it very subtly, and whoever's watching her at any given time will need to be even more careful not to be noticed; once she's got something in her head, she's like a dog with a bone – she just won't give it up. That sounded like a fairly accurate description to me.

"We'll all be as careful as we can. But we can only pull back just so far before we're in a bad position to get to her in time if need be." Charlie nodded.

I briefly considered whether or not I should ask him if it was ok for me to take Bella out on Wednesday. The manners I was raised with screamed that yes I should, but the rest of me was pretty sure she'd tell him herself and I'd only be rocking the boat unnecessarily with both Bella _and_ Charlie if I didn't let her talk to her Dad herself. I decided I'd leave it for her to tell him, and if he had a problem with me dating his daughter I fully expected that he'd come and talk to me about it.

"Well ok then." I said, standing up and reaching out to shake his hand. "I better get going; I've got a patrol to run, a vampire to chase down, a tribe to lead, and a relatively new wolf to train." He gave me a tired grin

"So it's a slow day for you then, huh?" He joked and I chuckled. "Yeah I like to start the week off nice and slow if I can. I waved goodbye and headed back to the Rez to take my turn at patrolling.

Jared was the only one phased when I got back and phased in myself, and as soon as I was in wolf form he jumped straight into business.  
_"Hey, Boss. The leech swung by and poked around over where Bella came off her bike." _He told me, and I was immediately on edge.

_"What was she doing? How long did she stay? Did you see her or just smell her?"_ I asked.

_"Whoa there, Boss. I only smelled her. By the strength of the scent, she only hesitated by the bike for a few seconds, the high-tailed it out if there, straight back down that corridor and away from the Rez, Charlie and Bella." _He told me. _"I've not caught another whiff of her since, so I'm guessing that she's done for the day and waiting for her next opportunity." _I was pretty sure he was right, but I showed him the conversation I'd had with Paul about the 'Charlie's got himself a leech stalker', and then I showed him the chat I'd just had with Charlie.  
_"Well it'll certainly make it easier for us to guard the pair of them if they're on the Rez as often as anyone can swing it." _I felt his emotions shift to concern.

_"How is Bella anyway?"_ he asked. _"I'm guessing she really did herself some damage this time?"_

_"Yeah she really did. _I showed him a replay of her weird concussed conversation when I'd first 'found' her and Jake on the loggers laughed his furry little head off when I got the part where she was talking to what she thought was my disembodied face, but the laughter dropped right out of his head as soon as I got to the part about Taha Aki.

_"Where the fuck did she hear _that _name?" _he asked, as baffled as I had been._ You think that maybe Jake's been sharing secrets with Bella? Telling her our old stories or something?" _He wondered, and I had to admit to myself that I'd been thinking the same thing.

_"I guess it's possible." _I allowed. _"But I hope we're wrong; Jake's the old chief's son and so should know much better than talking about the tribe's history with non-tribe members." _I wondered to myself how Paul would react to Bella knowing stuff she had no business knowing, especially on top of the fact that I'd asked her out on a date. I clearly wasn't careful enough with my thoughts.

_"Seriously?" _Jared asked excitedly, _"You finally asked her? How did your wolf react to that? When are you going out? What are you going to do on this date?" _His questions came out so fast I had no hope of answering, even at the speed I could've done it speaking mind to mind.

_"Yes I asked her, No reaction from my wolf at all, it's perfectly fine with the idea, Wednesday, and dinner and a movie" _I answered with a mental smile; Jared was almost as pleased as I was that I was finally going to get a date with her.

_"So are you nervous?" _ He teased. _"What if she changes her mind? What if the date goes really badly? What if it turns out she's not interested in you like that? What if she wants more from you than you can give?" _I hadn't been nervous til then, but with each 'What if', Jared had succeeded in building my nerves higher and higher and with the last one, I started to feel more than a little sick.

_"Well thanks a fucking bunch, Jared." _I snapped angrily. _"I _was _just fine – not nervous at all, but now….."_ I could immediately feel his upset at causing me problems, but it was too late. The damage had been done.

_"Shit man, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get to you." _He apologised._ "Just ignore me. You know I talk a lot of shit sometimes." _

_"Sure." _I answered, not trusting myself to think of anything in case I let too much slip in my distress. _"You can phase back now; I've got the patrol now." _Before he did so, he sent me another regretful burst in apology, and then he was gone.

I spent the whole time I was patrolling freaking out about what he'd said. After Paul took over from me, I went home and lay awake, doing a bit more freaking out. I freaked out all of the following day, through my next patrol, and then I went to bed again to do another spot of freaking out. The only things going through my mind the entire time were the 'what ifs' that Jared had managed to lodge in there, I was sloppy at work, and distracted on patrol. Of course the other pack members noticed it, and their reactions were as diverse as their personalities. Jared was sympathetic, with a touch of wry amusement, and edged with his regret for driving me to being in the sorry state to begin with. Embry was supportive and sympathetic, but mixed in with his sympathy was confusion at seeing the guy he'd become used to regarding as his strong leader as messed up as I was. Paul couldn't have been less sympathetic if he tried. He threw a total shit fit, losing control and phasing when he found out that I'd asked Bella out, and once he'd managed to calm down and phase back to human form, he spent a couple of hours trying to talk me out of going through with it. Once he'd accepted that wasn't going to work, he took to making snide jokes at my expense at every opportunity. By the time I woke up for work on Wednesday morning I was a nervous wreck.

It was Jared that eventually managed to calm me back down again, which I guess was only fair as it was him that had started my panic fest in the first place. He showed up at my house ready for me to drive him to our job for the day, just like he always did, and we set out to continue work on the bathroom re-fit we'd been doing for the last few days. The woman we were doing the work for was in her mid-forties, attractive I guessed, in a desperate, lonely divorcee kind of way, and completely determined to get into either my pants or Jared's – she didn't seem to care which. Jared had christened her 'Cougar McGrabby-Hands' and we both spent almost as much time avoiding her unwanted advances as we did actually working on her bathroom.

"Dude, I was thinking about this whole date with Bella thing, and how I fucked up your head over it." Jared said as we drove along. "I've decided you're thinking about it completely wrong." I glance across at him and raised a brow.

"Oh really?" I said sarcastically, "And just how _should _I be thinking about it?"

"Well the way I see it is this; There's something about her that drives your wolf crazy, but in kind of a good way, and there are plenty of things about her that have you, Sam the human male, fascinated too. So from your side, she's an ideal partner for you, even if it's only for a short while." I was just opening my mouth to tell him that it wasn't the situation from _my _side that had me all fucked up, but he raised a hand to stop me from speaking. "I know what you're thinking – that it's the situation from _her _side that's bothering you. Well then I've got to tell you that you're being a complete idiot. You _know_ she's interested in you; she pretty much spelled it out to you and hung up a banner when she got her head all fucked up on Monday. We should all be so lucky as to have that much insight into the feelings of a girl we're interested in. But instead of looking back on that and remembering what you heard her say, you're intent on going over and over a few ridiculous questions that an over-excited idiot asked you without engaging his mind-to-mouth filter. "He gave a wry smile. "So now you need to ask yourself, 'Do I call off the whole thing before it gets even to the first date, show up for the date looking exhausted, run down and freaked out, or get the fuck over myself, finish up a little early today and go home to freshen up, get a bit of sleep, and get dressed in some decent date clothes, ready to make the best of the chance you've got here with her?" He sat back in his seat, staring out the window while I drove and considered his points. They were very good points actually, and the longer I thought about it, the more the panic began to fade and a small edge of excitement started to grow in to replace it. For the first time in over twenty four hours, I felt myself beginning to relax, my shoulders dropped from their position around my ears, and the tension in my whole body began to melt slowly but surely away. By the time we'd spent three hours working in the bathroom and avoiding McGrabby-Hands, the excitement was pulling into the lead, and I checked with Jared that he was happy to do the last finishing touches by himself if I was to go home and sort myself out like he'd suggested. Of course, Jared was happy to finish up alone, despite the fact that he'd have to grow eyes in the back of his head, so I went home, showered and shaved, then grabbed three hours or so of uninterrupted sleep. I felt so much better when I woke up again, that I was dressed and heading out the door way too early to meet Bella, so I drove as slowly as I could, without getting pulled over for kerb crawling, and still had to park a little way up the road from Bella's place, where I sat, tapping my fingers against the wheel in a state of nervous excitement, for twenty minutes before finally driving my truck down the road a little and stopping outside the Swan's house.

Taking a deep steadying breath, I walked up to the door and raised my hand to knock, and was pleasantly surprised when she opened the door before my knuckle made contact_. "Looks like I'm not the only one who's slightly over eager for this date."_ I thought with a mental smirk. She looked surprised to see me, though. I guessed she'd just not expected me to come up to the door to walk her to my truck. But my mom had raised me right; she'd always insisted that just sitting outside and honking the horn was bad manners.

"Bella, hi." I said with a grin. "You look great. All ready to go?" She really did look fantastic. The red sweater she was wearing set her skin off to a tee, her shoulders and neck exposed, showing off her flawless, milky white complexion. Her legs, encased in tight black skinny jeans looked endless, and even her quirky purple D.M.s with the little flower painted on one toe somehow worked, a stamp of her character on the outfit. She was stammering for a reply, which I hoped that meant she thought I looked ok too, so I gently took her elbow in one hand and led her over to my truck.

"Umm. The thing is, Sam, I umm." It seemed Bella was even more nervous about this date than I was which actually served to settle my nerves a bit. I guessed it was only to be expected; dating again after what she'd been through was a big step and I promised myself that I'd try my hardest to make it a pleasant, relaxed experience for her. She stopped by the truck, staring blankly at the trees for a few moments, and I grew a little concerned. _"Shit. Is she changing her mind already? Has she decided this is too soon for her? Oh fuck, maybe she's decided she's not really interested in me after all."_ My panic fest started up anew, though I tried to keep the signs of it off my face. I leaned down to look into her eyes, hoping to read there just how nervous she was so I could tell if I'd be able to calm her down or if the whole date was just a no-go.

"Bella? You ok?" Being that close to her, I was suddenly engulfed in her scent. My wolf nearly went completely berserk. Before now, every time I'd caught her scent it had been watered down a little by someone else's. When I found her in the forest after the Cullen leach left her there, his reeking, sweet bleachy smell has been all over her, and every time I'd been close enough to catch a whiff since then, she'd been wearing some of Charlie's clothes, hiding some of her own natural aroma. Even then my wolf had been obsessed over her wonderful smell, wanting to rub himself in it. Now, with no other scent to muddle the waters, not even perfume or deodorant, it was all I could do to keep myself in check. It wasn't just my wolf; I wanted to grab hold of her and rub my body against her, wanted to pull handfuls of her glorious mahogany hair - which was tumbling in loose curls down her back - up to my face and breath her in, wanted to strip us both naked right there in the street in front of her house and bury myself inside her_. "Yes, yes, and yes!"_ my wolf egged me on, approving wholeheartedly of my wildly spinning thoughts. I quickly grabbed hold of my slipping control, noticing that she was still staring blankly. Suddenly her expression shifted straight from completely blank to horrified realisation.

"Bella?" I was growing concerned about what was wrong.

"Sorry. I spaced out there for a moment." She apologised. "I just realised I didn't leave my Dad a note to tell him I'd be out with you. Give me just a moment?" She said with a small smile and I straightened up with a relieved smile of my own. _"Ok. A bit of an over-reaction to not leaving a note, but at least she's not backing out of the date." _I thought.

"Sure." I told her, and she quickly went back into the house. While I was waiting for her, I settled myself against my truck; folding my arms and leaning back to hook one heel on a front tyre. I took another calming breath. It had been a bit of a mixed start to the date, but hopefully things would pick up a little. When she came back out of the house, she hesitated for a split second in her doorway.

"Damn" She whispered under her breath, unaware that I could hear her clearly. I couldn't help the little smirk that crept across my face. "Definitely still interested." I congratulated myself smugly.

"Worth risking an extra day for." She whispered to herself. _"Huh?" _I wondered._ "What was that?"_ It didn't make any sense. _"Unless I miss-heard her and she said 'worth risking an extra _date _for." _I mused. _"Does that mean she's dating someone else too?" _I didn't like that idea at all. Sure, we were only just going out on our first date and I was planning on keeping the whole thing very light and casual, so I didn't really have any right to dislike it, but I did nonetheless. _"So who else could she be dating? And why is she so nervous in that case? If she's dating someone else too, then this isn't such a big step for her. Or am I just imagining things?" _I'd truly tangled up my mind by this point, unsure about whether or not I thought she was dating someone else or not. She started walking over to me at the truck so I opened the passenger door for her, then went round to the driver's side as she climbed in. I slid into the driver's seat, still trying to puzzle out what she could've meant by her odd whisper, and took a deep breath to settle my mind down a little. As soon as I did I was hit with a concentrated dose of her scent as it filled the cab of the truck. My body reacted instantly, my dick hardening once again in my jean, which really didn't have the space needed to accommodate it. In quite considerable discomfort, I shifted in my seat, trying to create a bit of space in my pants. Luckily she didn't seem to notice my squirming. I passed her a pile of CDs and asked her to pick the music for the journey. I wasn't concerned over what she'd pick out; all the CDs were mine, so I knew I liked them all, but there were some I like more than others and I was also curious to learn her personal taste in music and what it would say about her. I drove away from her place, still wondering a little over the (either weird or upsetting) comment, she whispered a few moments before

The drive to Port Angeles went by quickly, each of us talking about out day. I told her all about putting up tiles in the bathroom Jared and I were working on for Cougar McGrabby-hands, and she told me all about an evil little spoilt bitch she was at school with and how this nasty piece of work was trying to ruin her life all of a sudden. It sounded like a classic case of jealousy to me, and I was amazed at how calmly Bella was taking the on-going abuse.

"So I told her that it was impossible for me to be even if I wanted to as I have no gag reflex." It was an innocent enough comment, I guess, but suddenly all my mind could focus on was the use I could put that particular trait of hers to. I no longer saw the road in front of me; instead was a crystal clear image of Bella on her knees in front of me, my rock hard cock all the way in her mouth as she swallowed around it. The image was so clear I could have sworn I could actually feel her throat massaging me. I gripped the steering wheel too tight, completely immersed in my dirty fantasy and I felt the car swerve as I chocked back the moan that threatened to escape.

"Shit. Are you ok, Sam?" I heard her voice dimly through my blow-job fantasy, and I felt her grab the wheel. "Do you need to pull over?" I fought my way back to reality, horrified that I'd let my mind wander so badly while driving. I took a few deep breaths to calm myself and I shook my head at her, clearing my throat which had gone completely dry.

"No, no. I'm fine." He told her reassuringly. "Sorry about that. I just sorta choked on thin air there." She gave me a sympathetic smile.

"It's ok. It happens." She said, and as I relaxed into my seat again, shifting as carefully as I could so she wouldn't notice the huge hard on which was now cramped painfully in my pants, she relaxed again herself and went back to her story. I was just pulling into the parking lot at the movie theatre as she came to the end of her story which was just as well because the nasty little spoilt bitch who'd been picking on her had ended up flat on the floor covered in putrid deer, maggots and teacher vomit and I was absolutely howling with laughter at her story, while Bella giggled along with me. I wiped tears from my eyes as I put the truck into park and turned to face her in the cab.

"You know I haven't laughed that hard in years." I told her honestly. "Thanks, Bella. However the rest of this date goes, that's the most fun I've had in a really, _really_ long time." She smiled shyly, and blushed. I couldn't understand why I was reacting to her so strongly but hadn't imprinted; I'd thought it was just my wolf that was obsessed with her scent, but now I'd smelled the completely pure version, it turned out that the man in me loved it too. She only had to briefly mention a lack of gag reflex and I was so far gone in a fantasy that I nearly crashed the truck, and just listening to her talking about her day really _was _the most fun I'd had in years. She was exactly the sort of woman I would choose to spend the rest of my life with if I could. She was perfect for me, so _why _hadn't I imprinted on her? _"Maybe it's a question of maintaining eye contact for long enough and concentrating hard." _I thought to myself. I leaned in closer to her so I could make eye contact without anything else distracting me in the slightest, determined to give imprinting the perfect opportunity to occur if it was going to.

"Thanks, Sam. I'm having fun too." She told me and I gently squeezed her hand. She looked up into my face and I gave it all my concentration. _"Come on, come on, Imprint for fuck's sake" _I willed both myself and my wolf. The atmosphere in the truck cab seemed to almost crackle with static electricity, and she swallowed with what I guessed was nerves. Realising I was probably making her uncomfortable, I sat back; it hadn't happened. I'd given it the best opportunity I could and nothing had happened. I couldn't deny to myself that I was disappointed, but as I wouldn't be able to explain my disappointment to her, I kept it hidden. Slapping my hands on my thighs lightly, I announced.

"Well we'd best get moving or we'll miss the movie." We stepped out of the truck and I led her to the theatre with my hand in the small of her back.

"Like I said on Monday, they're showing classics today, so I thought I'd let you pick between the two that are on tonight." I said, throwing her a grin. "Your choice is either '2001: A Space Odyssey', or 'Monty Python's The Life of Brian'" She didn't seem to know what to make of the weird mixed bag of movies, and she shook her head.

"We'll I've never really been much of a sci-fi girl, so it's gonna have to be 'The Life of Brian' I guess" She said with a little laugh. "I've never seen it. Is it as funny as 'The Holy Grail'?" My grin grew wider._ "Better and better! She's a Python fan too?" _I remembered Leah had always hated Monty Python, she'd been completely baffled by their surreal comedy.

"Funnier" I said. "We'd better hurry or we'll miss the start." I lengthened my strides a little and grabbed her tiny hand in mine, partly to help her keep up and partly because I just wanted an excuse to hold her hand.

After buying our tickets - she made a reach for her money in her pocket, which I appreciated as a gesture but wasn't going to allow; a gentleman pays for his date. - We stopped at the concession stand and I bought us some popcorn and a large coke to share while we watched. The screen was packed and the only pair of seats left was nowhere near an aisle, which was what I'd been hoping for, to give me somewhere to stretch my legs out as we sat, so I had to bite the bullet and sit right in the middle of a row. _"Shit. This is going to be cramped unless I can maybe use some of her leg room, she's only small herself so she might not mind." _I thought to myself. As we sat down, I moved my body in the only way it was going to fit into the cramped space with any degree of comfort, turned almost sideways in my seat, and with my legs pushed so they were under one of hers and over the other one.

"Sorry." I said with a rueful grin. "My legs are too long to fit unless I sit like this." Her nervous stammer returned as she answered.

"N no. I it's fine." I could hear her swallow nervously. As wonderful as her usual scent was, I suddenly got a waft of something even more amazing; pure arousal was drifting off her, hitting my nose like a heavyweight boxer's right hook, and giving me yet another instant hard on. My poor cock, restrained as it was both by my position and my now far too tight jeans, was certainly getting some punishment during this date. I fought back another groan at the delicious smell and my own answering arousal. I was, of course, pleased that she was turned on just at the feel of my legs rubbing against hers, but I knew it was going to be a fucking long couple of hours sitting through the movie trying to fight back erections if she kept up her feelings of arousal. About ten minutes into the movie, having just about managed to talk my dick back to at least semi-limpness, I caught another delicious waft of arousal from her, which of course set my dick off again. I shifted, trying to create a bit of growing space in my jeans as I realised I obviously wasn't going to be able to keep my reactions to her scent from occurring. As I shifted though, her arousal grew stronger, causing me to shift and squirm some more, which set her off again. We like an executive stress toy – the kind with the swinging metal balls. I'd react to her arousal, shifting and squirming in my seat, which would make my legs rub against hers, which would set her off, which would once again set me off. By the time it finished, I'd never been more relieved to see the end of a Python movie. I now had a new problem; how to get up from my seat and walk with Bella out to the foyer without her, or someone else noticing the large tent I had put up in my pants. I was still trying to work out a solution when to my relief she turned to me and mumbled

"I'm just gonna head to the bathroom. Meet you out front?" I quickly removed the relief from my face and arranged it instead into a polite smile.

"Guess I'll do the same. See you out front then." We both rose and I quickly shoved my hands into my pockets in the age old tradition of High school freshmen around the world trying to hide their perpetual hard ons. We headed out towards the bathrooms and as soon as Bella had gone through the ladies' door, I quickly doubled back to the concession stand where I talked the cashier into giving me a small cup of ice. I quickly headed into the men's room, entered a stall and, pulling down my pants, poured the ice onto my throbbing dick. The effect was instantaneous. No more tent pole, just a good length of rope. I smirked a little to myself at the metaphor, pulled up my pants and headed out to find Bella. Sadly, it seemed I'd taken just a little too long. I got into the foyer just in time to hear the Newton Douchebag's shrill little girly voice;

"Oh look, it's Bella. Where's her foetus going to gestate?" Mike said loudly with a snigger. _"Holy shit, he's such a dick."_ I thought, _"Apart from anything the fact that he's talking to Bella like that, starting in on the rumours again; out of all the possible, brilliant quotes from the movie, he goes with _that_ one?"_

"She's got it shoved up her box!" One of his friends yelled at the top of his voice, obviously another complete asshole. I took a firm hold of my temper, knowing this would be just the sort of thing that would test my control. I walked slowly over towards them behind Bella, not wanting to step in if she preferred to handle it herself, and knowing, after the Forks supermarket incident that she was very capable of doing so, but ready in case she needed me

"Well as long as she doesn't try to pin it on me. I know how condoms work, you know. It'll turn out to be the spawn of one of her little native fuck buddies." Suddenly the grin dropped off his face as he caught sight of me towering behind Bella. I knew that the expression on my face must've been very grim indeed. Whatever my intentions had been before that last comment, he had just taken it a step too far for me to stay out of it. He was insulting both Bella and I and my entire tribe all in one stupid, ignorant comment. My wolf was _very _close to the surface right at that moment and it was all I could do to keep it at bay. I stepped around Bella and towards Mike, each step forcing the smaller boy to crick his neck further and further back to keep my livid face in view. _"Cowardly little short-ass" _I thought disgustedly. Keeping my voice very quiet and even, but perfectly audible to Mike's friends I spoke.

"Listen very carefully, little boy." I began, widening my shoulders a bit, exaggerating the size difference between us. "I'd be willing to bet that Bella's already told you, but apparently you're too mentally challenged to understand simple instructions, so I'm going to make it crystal clear for you." I jabbed a single finger into his chest hard enough that it'd probably bruise. "Stop. Spreading. Rumours." I punctuated each word with a hard jab of my finger, making the little pussy wince. "You will not speak to her, or about her, or about any of her friends of family. Lauren Mallory is already facing criminal and civil charges for her behaviour. I'm sure your mommy would be mad and spank you if you ended up doing the same. And whether she does spank you or not, if I ever" another finger jab "hear that you have said anything" jab "more about Bella, I will be making a personal" jab "painful" jab "visit to you myself. Understood?" Mike nodded his head at a furious speed, rubbing his chest where I'd poked him. I bent down to whisper in his ear, my hands clenched and trembling in anger at the spoilt little shit, and he flinched.

"I can see right through you, you know, you nasty little fucker." I whispered. "You could never get anywhere with her yourself, so you reacted like every spoilt child does when he can't get what he wants; you threw a tantrum. Now I don't know who, or how many people she's slept with, and I'm _damn _sure you don't either. But that's _her _business, no-one else's. You're a real big man, picking on a girl standing all alone at a movie theatre while you're surrounded by all your friends, but you need to think about this; your friends won't be around you all the time, and if I get even the tiniest hint the so much as your shadow touched Bella's from now on, I'll find you when you're all alone, and I'll take steps to make sure that you won't be saying _anything _to_ anyone ever_ again. Now run away, little boy. The grownups are sick of the sight of you." He paled dramatically and stumbled backwards a few paces before retreating with his friends at a very fast walk. My wolf was torn between being ecstatic at verbally beating the little shit, and wanting to chase after him and tear him in two physically too. I however, was suddenly aware that I'd probably just pissed Bella off, wading in there without letting her handle it herself. She was a strong woman and probably wouldn't appreciate me sticking my nose into her business. I turned round to her, a hangdog expression on my face.

"Sorry, Bella. I know you could've handled it yourself, but if I hadn't have said something to him, I might've had to hit him instead, and I know you wouldn't have wanted me to do that." She looked amazed for a moment or two, and then she gave me a little smile and held out her hand to me, for the first time initiating physical contact between us.

"It's ok. Just try not to make a habit of it." She told me, trying to appear stern. I smiled back at her. "Or at least not on occasions when I can probably handle it myself." She amended and I broke out in a wide grin.

"Yes ma'am." I said with a cheeky wink. "So, after that little interlude, shall we get this show back on the road and go eat?" I asked. She nodded. "What do you feel like eating?"

"Anything but Italian please." She replied. I briefly wondered if it was just because she wasn't in the mood for Italian, or if there was another reason. Having eaten her amazing lasagne I knew it wasn't because she didn't like Italian food. _"What's it matter right now?" _I asked myself. _"Even after that little scene she's still willing to go eat with you, so get with the program!"_

"Ok then." I said, walking off still holding her hand. "Anything but Italian it is then." She giggled and tried to go faster to keep up with me. I guess I should've expected her to trip at that pace, but I still managed to catch her by the elbow just as I had that time in the supermarket, stopping her mid-fall.

"Sorry. I forgot how little your legs are. "I apologised, feeling a little guilty. She gave a mock snarl.

"Hey!" She was faking being mad at me. "My legs are just perfect thank you very much!" I couldn't disagree with that – her legs were just amazing.

"You're not wrong there" I murmured; quiet enough for her to miss it. I slowed my pace quite a bit though, not wanting to make her trip again and we wandered along at a relaxed pace til we found a promising looking Chinese restaurant. Once we'd both agreed, we headed inside and the hostess sat us at a quiet, private spot near one corner.

We talked and talked during dinner, about everything and nothing. Apart for covering our favourite parts of the movie and our friends, we also talked about our families. She told me about her mom and step dad and I talked about my mom and Joshua, who I never talked about with anyone. There was something about Bella though that made me want to open up and share stuff about my life that no-one else knew about. I told her stuff that I'd even managed to keep buried right at the back of my mind, where the rest of the pack couldn't see it. With all our talk, we took forever eating but we still hadn't discussed what I really felt we needed to. As much as I might've been wishing by that point that it wasn't the case, I couldn't allow either of us to get too deep into a relationship that had every chance of ending abruptly and painfully should I ever imprint. If I'd wanted to hurt myself and a woman in that way, I would've just stayed with Leah after I first phased. We were waiting for our deserts by the time I finally managed to carefully steer the conversation towards dating and what we were both looking to get out of it. I started off by hedging a little around my own reasons for not looking for something long-term, as I could hardly tell her the whole truth, but didn't want to outright lie to her.

"See the thing is, Bella. With all the responsibilities I have in my life right now, I'm just not in a position to be starting a committed relationship. I'm guessing that or you it's probably not on the cards right now either as you'll probably be heading off to college soon?" She nodded in agreement and I continued. "So would you be maybe interested in going out with me again, and we'll just see where it goes?" I asked. "As long as we're both aware that it's not going to end up with us growing old together." I added light heartedly though I felt anything but light hearted. As soon as I'd said it I realised that had everything been different, she was _exactly _the sort of woman that I _would_ like to grow old with. Not noticing my internal gloom, she grinned at me.

"Yes. I've had fun tonight and I'd like to do it again sometime." She replied and at that I was able to grin back. "You know, of course that I had a really bad break-up last time though, so can I just ask one thing?" She asked me seriously.

"Sure." I replied, and figuring I should definitely give whatever she was going to ask my full attention I put down my drink and leaned forward a little, focusing entirely on her. _"I just hope that whatever it is she asks for is something I can give her – she looks like she's very serious about it, whatever it is."_

"When either one of us wants to call it a day, we just say it straight out. No lies, no drama, and hopefully we can stay friends afterwards." I blew out a breath of relief and gave her a broad grin. That was _definitely _something I could give her. I hated lying at the best of times and just plain couldn't bring myself to lie to her at all anyway, so that was covered. As for drama, I'd always hated it. It was one of the very few things I was relieved to miss out on after I broke up with Leah; she'd always been one for drama and I'd found it difficult and uncomfortable to deal with. In fact, after we broke up, I'd seen her around a couple of times and she'd created a massive dramatic scene both times and so I'd avoided her completely ever since. Something that was amazingly easy to do when you have super hearing and a super sense of smell. Any time I'd heard her or smelled her coming, I got out of there as fast as I could.

"That's pretty much exactly as I'd want it too. I'll drink to that." I raised my glass, making our agreement a toast which she echoed with a smile. "No lies and no drama."

"No lies and no drama." We touched glasses and drank. "So that's it then. We just see how it goes."


	27. Chapter 26: Phasing and Fantasies

**So this is an epic length chapter for you. It was either that or split it again and give you 2 more Sam pov chapters, making you all wait even longer for the next Bella chapter. **

**I had a couple of queries about back-tracking and getting each chapter from both POV. I've got to admit, I find it frustrating as hell to do it each time, much as I enjoy writing each character, but the way I've written things so far - with so many misunderstandings, secrets and red herrings, I need to show both side for the readers to understand exactly what each character is taking away from each event. I'm pleased to say though, that as out lovely couple become closer, spend more time together, and eventually have no secrets, showing everything from both POV won't be necessary any longer and I'll be able to pick which POV suites which part of the story and only give you the events once as they'll both have the same understanding of what's going on. I hope it's not bothering you all_ too_ much to have both POVs, and I hope you'll all stick with me as I press on with the story. Thanks as always for the feedback. I appreciate knowing how you guys feel about the story and the way I'm writing it, and am always happy to get constructive criticism to help me improve. So keep those reviews coming! ;0) Thanks, and enjoy. Bommaloo**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 26: Phasing and Fantasies

The staff at the restaurant were clearly relieved to be getting rid of us when we finally left; I guess their mid-week customers didn't tend to hang about for quite as long as we had, although personally I thought nearing ten o'clock wasn't all that late. We walked, hand in hand back to where I'd parked the truck at a slow pace, just enjoying each other's company and not needing to fill the comfortable silence with pointless chatter. I was deep in thought, my mind jumping from one thing to the next as I tried to make sense of everything. I still couldn't for the life of me work out what it was about Bella that had both the man and the wolf in me so tied up in knots if she wasn't my imprint. The desire to rip that little shit Newton's head off had been so strong, almost like the sort of feelings I'd experienced through the pack mind from Jared when something threatened his imprint, Kim. _"But I've proved to myself conclusively that Bella isn't my imprint, so what the fuck is going on?"_ Another concern that I was going to have to deal with, probably sooner rather than later, was what was going to happen once Jake phased. Bella and I had avoided talking about Embry this evening – both of us well aware that it would probably lead to a very tense conversation – but I knew how Jake and Quil, and probably to some extent Bella, had felt once Embry had phased and I'd ordered him to keep away from his friends for their own safety. I could only hope that with Charlie and Billy playing the 'Jake's sick' card, when Jake _did _phase, Bella wouldn't start to resent my involvement in his life while she herself was kept at a distance.

I worried a little about how Leah would react to me dating again. Ever since we had split up I hadn't been on a date with anyone else – there was no point as far as I was concerned; unless I imprinted, any relationship I started would forever have the chance of suddenly being ripped away, and before Bella, I hadn't met any woman that my wolf would tolerate seeing on a casual basis, or even a woman that I felt was worth the trouble. I had a sneaking suspicion that Leah read my continued single status as evidence that I still had romantic feelings for her, and for the first six months or so, she would've been right, but those feelings had slowly faded away, leaving just fond memories and while I still cared for her, I no longer loved her. It was ironic that my mom, still not speaking to me, now had stronger feelings towards Leah's presence in my life than I did. That was another thing to worry about; how would my mom react to me dating Bella? I knew that she'd always had good things to say about Charlie, so she couldn't object to _who_ Bella was, and Bella not being native would never be an issue to mom, who hated racism in any form, so she couldn't object to _what _Bella was, but I was fairly sure that mom could and would object strongly to who and what Bella _wasn't_; she wasn't Leah.

"You ok?" Bella's voice cut through my reverie, and the little squeeze of my hand pulled me completely from my thoughts, startling me a little.

"Yeah I'm good." I reassured her. "Sorry. I just got a little side-tracked by my own thoughts."

"That's ok." She told me. "I get completely absorbed by my own thoughts too sometimes." Remembering the time she'd worried me so much on the beach, I gave a little chuckle.

"Yeah I know." She raised a questioning brow so I explained. "That time I found you on the beach and got freaked out when I couldn't get an answer from you, even when I was yelling right in your face." Once again, her trademark blush crept over her face.

"Oh. Right. That was the first time I'd done that." I was a little confused.

"Done what? Sat on the beach, thinking?"

"No." She laughed. "When I need to quiet my thoughts and balance myself, I sit cross legged, relax my body, focus on my breathing and just sort of let my mind drift free. I find that if I'm not directing my thoughts consciously, but letting them come and go as they please, I can make more sense of things that trouble me. And the peaceful feeling I get after I've spent some time like that lasts for hours, sometimes even days. I can do it anywhere really, but it works best at First Beach." She rushed through her explanation, worried I was betting, that I'd think she was weird. She needn't have worried. I hadn't thought she could do or say anything to make me admire her more but she had just proved me wrong. She was talking about meditation, about putting herself in a trance state and not only that but she was doing it without the decades of training that wise ones. Witch doctors and shaman around the world had to undergo to allow their minds and bodies to do it. I pulled her gently to a stop. Turning her to face me, I lifted her chin with my fingers to make her meet my gaze.

"That's meditation you're talking about. Going into a meditative state like that is something that religious people and shamans, healers and wise men and women all around the world spend years and years learning to do. And you taught yourself to do it?" she nodded hesitantly.

"Well sort of. I mean I kinda did it by accident the first time. You know, that day you found me?" I nodded, encouraging her to go on. "That's why I thought I'd just fallen asleep. I was so pissed at you for 'waking me up' you know." We both laughed at the memory, beginning to walk down the street again.

"That's so amazing, that you taught yourself to do that. It just shows what a strong mind and spirit you have, to be able to do that, to learn how to put yourself in a meditative trance with no-one to show you." The more praise I gave her, the redder and more uncomfortable she grew. _"Looks like she's not too good with compliments." _I noted. _"Well she's going to have to suck it up and learn to get over that, cos if I think she deserves praise, I'm going to give it!"_ I let her off the hook though, not wanting her to feel awkward during our date.

"Thank you." She said politely. "Though I'm not sure I really deserve the praise that much. I needed a way to deal with all the stress and upset I'd been through, and I was lucky enough to stumble across a way to do that. No more, no less." I let the subject drop, gently squeezing her hand as we wandered along, and turned into the parking lot.

When we got to the truck, I opened the passenger door for her, but she'd already walked between the truck and the car parked close to its right side, so she had to squeeze back through the, now tiny, gap between me with the open door, and the neighbouring car. Having her that close, her scent filling my nose, her body pressed tight against mine and brushing up against me was more than I could take. Almost without me commanding it to, my hand shot out and caught her elbow stopping her in her tracks. I _had _to kiss her, both the wolf and the man in me were demanding it, but I also knew I had to give her an out if she wasn't comfortable with the situation. So I carefully searched her face for any signs of discomfort, as I slowly began to lean down, gently pressing her back into the parked car behind me. As I gradually drew closer and closer she looked slightly uncertain, so I paused just a fraction of an inch from making contact, waiting to see if she'd pull away. She didn't. Instead she closed the gap herself, pressing her lips firmly against mine and causing that tingling feeling I'd gotten before when I kissed her cheek in the hospital to start up again. At first her movements still seemed a little uncertain; I guessed it was just nerves though, as before long she was eagerly mimicking the movements of my own lips and allowing me to move closer still, deepening the kiss and moulding the front of my body against hers as I pressed her more firmly into the car. One again moving without my conscious command, my hand let go of her elbow and gently ran up her arm, resting for a moment on her shoulder, then slipping around to the back of her neck and ending up cupping the side of her face and spreading round to the back of her head. _"Damn, her hair is so _soft!_" _It felt like warm liquid silk running between my fingers and for a second I felt the overwhelming urge to tangle my fist in it, to never let go. I managed to restrain the impulse, though only just, and instead forced myself to concentrate on the feel of the small of her back against my other hand as I ran my tongue slowly and gently across the seam of her lips, asking for entry, which she gave without pause and our tongues met and rubbed together for the first time. Her approving moan at this, and her hands moving to grab one upper arm and my lower back, dragged an answering groan from my own throat, without having to do much at all, she was easily the hottest woman I'd ever had the pleasure to meet, and I was fast losing my tenuous grip on my self-control. At my slip in concentration, my urge to tangle my fist in her hair overwhelmed me and the hand which had still been cupping her jaw, slid bag into her hair and did just that. A tiny, aware part of my mind braced for her reaction, ready to apologise profusely for getting too rough, but I was in no way prepared for the reaction I actually got. Her grip on me tightened and she pulled me tighter against her body, pressing my rock hard cock against her soft stomach as a huge wave of arousal poured off her, sending the rational part of my mind flying off with the last thought _"Fuck me; she _Likes _that!" _Our mouths moved almost frantically, both of us letting little moans escape our throats as our kiss went on and on.

"Erm. Excuse me."

No longer in complete control of myself, I slid one of my thighs between hers and she instantly began to grind herself against it, I could feel the heat and moisture which had pooled in her panties through her jeans and mine, which set me off rocking my own hips, grinding my hard-on against her stomach and groaning again, louder, in approval.

"I said, excuse me!"

I was aware that my fingers, which had slipped up under the bottom of her sweater to meet flawless satin skin, were digging into the flesh at the small of her back, and could only hope that they weren't hurting her as I could no sooner have taken off and flown around Port Angeles than released my hold on her. Apparently they weren't hurting, or if they were she liked it, as her response was to grab a handful of my ass and using it to pull my lower body closer still. Our lips moved on and on, our tongues brushing together more frantically.

"EXCUSE ME!" We broke apart, shocked by the interruption and panting like a pair of heavy breathers on a phone sex line. Out of the corner of my eye I could see the source of the interruption. Glaring at us, car keys in hand, was a thoroughly shocked and disgruntled middle aged man.

"If you could bear to tear yourselves away from each other's tonsils for a moment, I'd quite like to get into my car!" The man said with disdain. Bella was clearly mortified. She buried her bright red face into my chest and mumbled into my shirt.

"Sorry" She said, and then pulled herself free of my embrace and scrambled awkwardly into the truck, where she sat, hiding her flaming face in her hands. I turned and gave the man an evil glare. He started glaring back, but I guess something about my expression showed that the wolf wasn't too far from the surface. I took a half step towards him and he flinched back several paces. The low growl that was rumbling in my chest only served to increase his nervousness and a moment later he broke, rushing towards the driver's door of his car and jumping in so fast that he hit his head on the way in. He tore out of his space so fast that his tyres squealed and for the second time that evening my wolf was torn between being ecstatic at the submission of an opponent and wanting to rip him to shreds physically. I stood there at the back of the track for a few minutes willing both my wolf and my hard-on down. I couldn't believe how I had allowed myself to act. _"Oh fuck. She must think I'm a total perv now. Pushing things that far in a fucking parking lot?" _I tried hard not to think of how far things might've gone if we'd not been interrupted. That was no way to help myself calm back down. Finally I managed to get myself under control and I walked round and climbed into the truck. We sat there for a few moments in silence, not even looking at each other. I fiddled nervously with my keys, not quite knowing what to say or how to start. I took in a deep breath through my nose, still smelling her scent, heightened by the remaining traces of her arousal, then blew it out through my mouth with a tiny, groan.

"Bella, I'm really, really sorry." I blurted without thinking how it would sound to her. The look of horrified disappointment that flooded her face clued me in, and I hurriedly amended my statement.

"I'm not sorry about kissing you. Fuck, how could I be? That was the best kiss of my life. But I am sorry for pushing it so far. I swear I didn't plan on it, but I just sorta lost my grip on myself there for a few minutes." I was blushing a bit myself by the end if my speech, but as I spoke, a tiny smile crept across her features.

"It was my fault too, Sam." She told me. "I've never been kissed like that before, and I didn't exactly have the firmest grip on my own control." I gave her a big grin. _"Now there's_ _a compliment." _I thought. _"How many guys must a girl as beautiful as she is have kissed, and yet she's 'never been kissed like that before'?"_ She started giggling. "That poor man." She said through her laughter, and I began laughing along with her.

"Poor man nothing." I said with a loud snort. "That's probably the most action he's seen in decades." She started in with the blushing again at the thought, but her giggling continued uninterrupted as I started the truck and pulled out of the parking lot.

On the drive home, I reached out and picked up her hand, winding my fingers between hers and laying our joined hands against my thigh. We didn't talk much as I drove, both of us content to listen to the music and make the occasional observation about the band, or the movie we'd watched that evening. It was a comfortable quiet again though, neither one of us felt the urge to fill it with inane chatter. I finally pulled up outside her house at not quite eleven and turned off the engine. Twisting slightly in my seat I said

"Thanks for coming out with me tonight, Bella. I really did have an amazing time." She smiled and squeezed my hand one last time before she disentangled our fingers and pulled her hand free and into her own lap.

"Me too." She told me. "Thank you for a great evening." I noticed the porch light flick off for a split second, then back on again. "Subtle, Dad. Real subtle." She whispered to herself under her breath, not realising I could still hear her clearly. I gave a little snort of amusement.

"I guess that means you'd better head inside." I said, and not able to resist taking one last opportunity for the evening, I leaned forward and gave her a lingering, but relatively chaste kiss on the mouth. She kissed me back gently, then opened the passenger side door.

"I guess so." She agreed. "Night, Sam. Sleep well."

"You too." I told her and, after watching her all the way to her door, I drove away.

I was less than halfway home, still with a dopey grin on my face, when my cell rang and I reached into my back pocket to grab it. Charlie's voice came through instantly, sounding tense and hurried.

"Pull over, jump out, and get your furry ass back here ASAFP." He said in rushed undertones. "Jake's here, he's arguing with Bella, and if he doesn't phase in the next five minutes I'll eat my badge." I didn't bother with questions, I just jerked my truck over to the side of the road, already pulling off my clothes as I jumped out.

"On my way." I told him. "Get Jake away from her as calmly as possible, yelling will just make things worse, then get Bella inside if you can."

"You wanna waste another few seconds stating the obvious, or do you wanna just phase already and try to get here in time?" He sniped at me and hung up before I could reply. Throwing my cell and clothes into the cab of my truck, I started running and phased mid-stride, pouring on all the speed I could muster.

_"Get there in time, get there in time, get there in time."_ The mantra played along in my head in time with my running, seeming to help speed me along.

_"Get where in time? Boss? What's up?"_ Embry sounded curious and concerned. I could see in his mind that he was just completing a patrol loop and was closer to Bella's place than I was. I replayed the conversation with Charlie through my head, and was relieved to see through Embry's eyes that he'd already turned towards the Swan's at top speed before I'd finished with my replay.

_"I'm nearly there already, Boss. You need me to stay out of sight til he actually phases, right?"_ Embry was quick on the uptake and I was relieved that he was the one on duty that evening; having one of his best friends right there for his first phase would almost certainly make things easier on Jake, and I was far from his favourite person so it would be for the best to have more than just me there anyway.

_"Right."_ I answered, seeing through Embry's eyes that he was doing just that. Embry had a clear view of Jake standing under the porch light outside the Swan's house. Jake was shaking from head to toe, and it looked like Embry had arrived with perfect timing; just as he lay belly down in the undergrowth, the front door clicked shut. Almost as if the sound of the door was a phasing on/off switch, the second it clicked, Jake exploded into wolf form, his clothes ripping right off his body with a loud ripping noise. Finding himself suddenly four legged and furry, I watched Jake through Embry's eyes as he scrabbled around on his paws, trying to get his balance in his new form.

_"What the ever living _fuck_?"_ His words rang through my head for the first time, as always seemed to be the way, his mental voice 'sounded' just the same as his human voice. I let Embry handle this first part; we needed to get him away from the Swan's place, and into the forest, away from any curious eyes a quickly as possible, and confronting him with his least favourite person right then wasn't the best way to accomplish anything except a fight.

_"Jake, you need to chill, dude, come this way, towards the forest. I'm right here and I'll tell you what's going on."_ Embry spoke calmly, moving a little in the tree line to catch Jake's attention.

_"Embry? Dude is that you? How are you in my head?" _Jake asked, casting his head about wildly, trying to spot his friend. Seeing the slight movement in the trees, he startled, scrabbling with his claws on the porch as he struggled not to fall over his own paws._ "Embry, man. Did you know you're a fucking great big wolf?" _Jake asked in shock. I fought hard to keep my mental snort to myself, Embry didn't even try to hide his.

_"Yeah man, of course I know." _He replied. _"Did you realise that you are too?" _I arrived just in time to see Jake's wolf version of stunned speechless through my own eyes instead of Embry's. Jake, now a russet coloured wolf stood there on the porch, all four legs rigid, his great jaws hanging open and his eyes wide. Any other time, it would've been absolutely hilarious, but right then I didn't have time for comedy, I needed Embry to get Jake off that porch and into the trees before someone saw him. I was just about to step in myself, even knowing that it would likely ramp up the tension of the situation, when Embry broke through Jake's shock.

_"Jake. Come on man. I need you to come over here into the trees before someone sees you and calls animal control." _Jake finally took a few steps towards the forest, and Embry encouraged him. _"That's it, dude. This way. We'll run together back to the Rez and I'll try to explain everything as we run." _He told Jake. I'd never seen a new wolf gotten through to so quickly. I was going to put Embry on the case when or if Quil phased. The kid had a gift.

Seeing that Embry had things under control, I turned towards the Rez myself, taking care to run just a little way in front of them so I'd be close enough to help if needed. I felt Jared phase in, ready to take over the patrol from Embry. As soon as he was in wolf form, he noticed Jake's presence and spoke.

_"Jake? That you dude? Welcome to our weird and whacky wolf world." _He said irreverently, causing Jake to utter a slightly hysterical mental giggle.

_"Who's that? How are _you _in my head too? Seriously, I need to know what the fuck is happening. Like right now." _Jared sent him a calming burst of comfort.

_"It's Jared, Jared Cameron. I'm in your head cos I'm a wolf too. It's part of the whole deal – boundless speed and strength… no mental privacy" _He imitated the genie from Disney's Aladdin, causing both Embry and Jake to mentally snort.

_"So is this why you've been avoiding Quil and me?" _Jake asked his friend, and we all felt Embry's sadness wash over us.

_"Yeah. When we first phase our tempers aren't really controllable and we can easily hurt someone, so it was safest for you guys if I kept away, and I knew neither of you would let up til I told you why, so I just couldn't let you get near enough to start with the questions." _Jake seemed to think this through for a few moments.

_"Ok, I can see how that would make sense. I came so close to losing it with Bella a few minutes ago, it was real lucky that Charlie came out when he did and got me to back off a little, or I might've really hurt her." _He said guiltily. _"So I'm going to guess that Sam Uley's a wolf too, and that's why you were suddenly hanging with him? And Paul too? HOLY FUCKING SHIT!" _I saw through Embry's eyes as Jake suddenly skidded to a halt, all four feet ploughing trenches into the damp forest floor. I was confused as to what had suddenly freaked him out when up til then he'd been handling the whole wolf thing amazingly well. I didn't have to wonder for long. _"Paul's been all over my sister since they met on the beach this evening, and she's been just as bad. Is that safe for her? Is he going to suddenly lose his shit and phase around her and rip her apart? Fuck man, I need to get back home and warn her away from him." _I was momentarily shocked by the idea of Paul showing such interest in Billy Black's daughter; he knew better than to pull his man-whore ways around an Elder's daughter, but Jared's memory of the evening on the beach pulled me up short. In his head I could see him and Paul walking down the Beach together, talking and messing around as they headed to the diner, then Rachel Black came walking the other way with Leah, Paul and Rachel's eyes met, and the two of them stopped suddenly in their tracks, staring into each other's eyes, Paul with complete shock, an Rachel with complete confusion.

_"Holy shit. Paul Imprinted on your sister?" _For the first time Embry sounded less than his usual calm and collected self.

_"What the fuck is imprinting?" _Jake asked, totally baffled. _"Come on, man. I need to know everything about this wolf shit, and I need to know now." _I figured now was as good a time as any to let my presence be known.

_"We'll tell you everything you need to know, Jake. Just get yourself back to the Rez as fast as possible, and we'll meet you out back of your house." _I told him calmly. His reply was less aggressive and antagonistic than I'd expected under the circumstances.

_"That you, Sam?" _he asked.

_"Yeah, Jake. It's me." _I replied carefully, waiting to see how he'd react.

_"So I was right then. You're a wolf too. You in charge of this shit parade?" _

_"For now, yeah" _I answered, impressed with his calm attitude towards me so far. _"That's a part of everything we'll explain to you once we're back at your place." _

_"Ok. I'll be there soon." _He said and then he shut his thoughts away from the rest of us in a way that only I amongst the rest of the pack was able to do. I guessed it was an Alpha thing. I wondered how he'd take the news that he was supposed to be the one in charge eventually.

Before long we were all congregated out the back of the Black's house, each of us either sitting or lying on the ground as we used the pack mind to fill Jake in on the pros and cons of pack life. It seemed that the big blow up I'd been expecting from him wasn't going to happen. Now that he knew _why _I, and Paul and Jared behaved as we did, and why Embry had cut him and Quil out of his life, he was able to see things as they really were and the animosity had died. He wasn't at all happy with the concept of imprinting, and especially not with his sister being imprinted on by Paul Lahote of all people, but he begrudgingly accepted that there was nothing he could do to change things. What he refused to accept however, was his destiny as Alpha of the pack.

_"Nope. No way, not going to happen, no way, no how." _He stated categorically. _"I don't want it, I don't need it, and I'm not right for it. Sam, it looks to me like you're doing a great job with it. So you can have it. I'd fuck the whole thing up in twenty seconds flat if I ever got my hands on it." _He looked down at his feet and snorted. _"Excuse me – got my _paws _on it I should say." _I attempted to change his mind for several minutes, but I got absolutely nowhere so I decided to let it drop for the time being. I'd bring it up again at a later date. For now there was no point in letting him get all wound up when what we needed was to get him as calm as possible so he could phase back into human form. Billy had set four pairs of cut offs outside the back door ready for each of us once we were human again, so we began explaining to Jake how to go about it and demonstrating in turn. I went first this time, thinking about repairing the roof on my mom's place. I concentrated on memories of climbing the ladder, selecting shingles, picking up a hammer and nails. All the things that I needed my human form to accomplish. Once I'd phased back, Jared went next, then Embry. Finally Jake took on a concentrated look and his form began to slowly blur and he dragged himself back into his own human form again.

"Well done." I told him. "The only one who's managed it first time other than you is Embry. What did you think about?"

"Working on an engine." He told me, pulling on the cut offs that Jared passed him as he spoke. "I concentrated on picking out the right wrench and tightening nuts, and then 'presto changeo' there I was buck ass naked with three other dudes." I chuckled at him. "Seriously though. He added. If I'd seen four naked guys outside by the woods yesterday or even earlier today, I would've assumed they were all gay and indulging in some group activity. We should watch that. I don't want that sort of rumour going round, do you?" he looked at each of us and we all wore identical horrified expressions. I'd never thought of that – I'd always been more focused on hiding the wolf thing that wondering what it looked like to see half naked men emerging from the woods together. We'd really dodged a bullet so far with no-one spotting us. We needed to be a lot more careful.

"Good point, Jake." I agreed. "We should really be more careful on that front." I saw the other two nodding fervently in agreement.

Once Jake was phased back, I needed Jared back out on patrol; this was no time to have a hole in our defense, not with an obsessive vampire running about out there. I sent him back out, telling him I'd take over the patrol once I was done settling Jake into pack life. Heading into Jake's house, Embry and I went straight into the living room, leaving Jake in the kitchen where his dad had him pinned in a supportive hug bent almost double over his dad's wheelchair. The two of them needed a moment, and I tried hard not to be jealous that Jake's father knew about the wolf thing and was proud, and yet my mom wasn't talking to me as in indirect result of my own wolf status.

When Jake and Billy re-joined us, we sat down with a beer each and answered any questions Jake had, telling him about our current situation with the redhead leach, and letting him know just who else knew about the wolves so that he was aware who he could and couldn't talk to about things. As I'd expected, he put up a bit of a fight after being told to avoid both Quil and Bella. I told him the same as I'd told Embry, and Embry backed me up, pointing out that by the looks of things it was only a matter of time before Quil made his first phase and joined us all anyway. It took me agreeing that once he'd gained control over his wolf he'd be allowed to spend _supervised _time with Bella to settle him down completely. I didn't really like making the agreement, but as I was planning on spending plenty of time with her myself, I could hardly ban him from seeing her completely once he was calm enough to, it would've made me a hypocrite.

Before I could phase and take over the patrol, there was one more problem that needed to be discussed. When Jared had imprinted, he'd asked me and the council of Elders for permission to tell her about the wolves. As she was undeniably linked to our world from the moment their eyes met, the elders and I gave permission. What we should've done then, but failed to do, was issue an order that any wolf that imprinted from that point onwards must take the same course and ask permission. As the order was never issued, Paul had assumed it was ok for him to tell Rachel all about the wolves and imprinting straight away without permission. It was just luck that she happened to be Billy's daughter, and therefore well versed in the old legends, making her one of the safest people to have told all our secrets. The idea of anyone else being told before an imprint had been confirmed had all the Elders squirming though. Not being wolves themselves, they couldn't understand the degree to which we felt each other's emotions and saw each other's memories, making it pretty much impossible for one of us to mistake when we ourselves imprinted. The Elders had apparently been putting pressure on Billy all evening to get him to agree to issuing the order that no-one, not even an imprint should be told of the legends, until the imprint had been confirmed and the Elders approved. The idea didn't sit too well with me; why a bunch of old men who never had and never would experience what we wolves did should have a say in who we allowed into our world completely escaped me. I said as much to Billy.

"I can't disagree with you there, Sam." He told me. "We can't possibly understand everything you boys go through completely, no matter how much we try. But the others have been up my ass about this ever since I called to tell them the news about Paul and Rachel. In a way I can see their point; they're both very conservative and want things to be the same as when the last pack were around. What they're failing to understand is that the last time we had a pack of protectors, the Elders had been wolves themselves before they stopped phasing, and so understood the wolves that they had authority over in a way that we just can't." He gave a deep sigh, running his hand though his hair in frustration. I'll keep trying to convince them, but it would help if you could voluntarily assure them that no-one else will be told without their say-so _before _they can issue the order." He gave me a sly grin and a wink. "That way, if something comes up and someone needs to be told, it would merely be reneging on an agreement, rather than disobeying a council order." I was impressed with his clever way of handling the other Elders. If I ever went back on the agreement there would be a lot of arguing, sure but no actual disciplinary action could be taken. Not that I could think of much that the council could do to punish a wolf, but I'd rather avoid the situation entirely if possible.

"I like the way you think, Billy." I told him. "I'll contact the other Elders in the morning, before they can call a council meeting and issue any orders. Hopefully that'll head them off." We shook hands and Embry and I left, Embry heading back to my place where I told him he could crash for the night again if he wanted, and I headed back to collect my abandoned truck and clothes before I took over patrol from Jared.

After an uneventful patrol, I got back home, did a few chores, called Harry Clearwater and Old Quil, and finally climbed, exhausted, into bed at around ten thirty AM. My sleep was full of dreams of Bella, and what might've happened had we not been interrupted in the parking lot and I woke hard enough to pound nails into a brick wall and frustrated as hell. I stumbled off towards the shower, memories of how Bella's body had felt pressed up against mine and how her wonderful silky hair had felt in my hand running through my mind. As much as I tried to dismiss the thoughts as I lathered up my hair, one memory in particular kept jumping back into my mind over and over again; _"No gag reflex, no gag reflex" _It was every red blooded male's dream, straight or gay, to have a partner with that particular peculiarity and nothing was going to keep the fantasies at bay for long. Giving in, I lowered my soapy hand and gripped my throbbing cock. I imagined Bella in the shower with me, her wet hair plastered down her back, and drops of water running down her skin, beading at the end of her nipples then dripping off. Fantasy Bella caught her bottom lip between her teeth and looked up at me from beneath her lashes.

"Will you let me take care of that for you?" she asked in a husky voice, taking a step forward and putting her tiny hand beside mine on my cock. I groaned in approval, taking my own hand away and letting her take over. Her grip was perfect, not too light, not too firm, and when her other hand dropped to cup my balls, I threw my head back and let out a loud moan.

"Oh _fuck. _Bella" Her hand on my cock sped up, occasionally circling around the head before dropping back down the shaft, and each time it did, my hips jerked involuntarily. I was getting closer and closer, my balls tightening and my muscles shaking when suddenly she stopped. My head flew up in shocked disappointment.

"You stopped. What did you stop? Please, I'm so close." I begged her, reaching out to take her hand and pull it back to my painfully hard cock. She moved her hand out of the way and shook her head, licking her lips and staring at my throbbing erection with smouldering eyes.

"I want to taste you. Can I?" she asked and I nearly gave myself whiplash I nodded so quickly. Making eye contact with me and holding it, she slowly sank to her knees on the floor of the shower, the hot water running over both of us as she one again took my cock in one hand and cupped my balls with the other. Still holding eye contact with me, she opened her mouth slightly and her pink tongue slowly came out and licked a hot stripe up the underside of my erection. Circling her tongue around the head much as she had done with her hand, she took a breath and suddenly plunged downwards, engulfing my whole cock in her mouth and throat in one go, her forehead brushing my stomach. The groan I let out could probably be heard a mile away. I'd never felt anything like it, and she then applied suction as she pulled back, circled her tongue once more, then plunged down again.

"Oh shit_. Please_ Bella _Please _don't stop." I felt my balls tighten again. I wanted to drag this out for hours, to enjoy it for as long as I could, but I was embarrassingly close to losing it any second. My hand moved of its own accord to grip a fistful of her wet hair and without me telling it too, pulled her head back down, pushing my entire length into the tight wet heat of her mouth and throat once more and she let out a muffled moan. The smell of her arousal, the suction, heat and tightness of her throat and then the vibrations in her throat and through my sensitised cock were too much. Every muscle seemed to melt as I came with a loud roar of "BELLA!" And her swallowing while I was still in her throat just increased the intensity of the orgasm. I whited out, collapsing to my knees on the floor of the shower before a panicked thought ran through my mind. _"Shit! Bella!" did I hurt her?" _I stared wildly around the shower, she wasn't there. Of course she wasn't there. It had only been a fantasy, my own imagination creating such an intense day dream that for a moment I'd been completely fooled by it. It had been the most intense orgasm of my life, and it had been self-induced. I could only imagine how amazing it might be when we actually slept together. Still trembling all over, I carefully pulled myself up onto my shaky legs, keeping one hand braced against the wall to keep me upright.

"Holy shit, that was amazing." My voice echoed in the empty bathroom. I rinsed off and climbed out, my knees still a little wobbly, then grabbed a towel and walked out towards my room.

"Everything ok, Sam?" I leapt half a foot in the air, spinning around and coming down facing the direction of the voice. Embry grinned at me, his eyes dancing with suppressed mirth. _"Oh fuck me sideways. There's no way he didn't hear all that." _I realised, my whole face blooming bright red. Clearing my throat, I went for a dignified response.

"Embry. I'd forgotten you were here. Yes. Everything's fine." His shoulders were shaking with laughter as he replied.

"Well thank goodness for that. I thought you were in real pain in there, judging from the yells, moans and swearing." I let out a sigh. He obviously wasn't going to let this drop and allow me to keep a little dignity.

"Drop it, Embry. What a man does in the bathroom is his own business." He let out a load snort and doubled over laughing.

"S-s-sure sure, Boss." He spluttered. "I'll try to mind my own business, but maybe you could keep from begging Bella in _quite _such a loud voice next time." I let out a snarl and stalked back to my room, ignoring the kid's hysterical laughter behind me. I slammed the door behind me and remained in my room until I heard Embry leaving the house.

Having arranged with Jared when I took over patrol from him that he would take Jake out for his first patrol run later that day, and knowing that Paul was patrolling right then, I had a rare period of free time on my hands. There were any number of things that I s_hould_ have been doing, but I found that I was so relaxed after my date with Bella, and my alone time with fantasy Bella, that I really didn't have it in me to do anything of any use to anyone. I flopped onto my big, comfortable old couch and flicked on the TV.

I managed to waste the rest of the day away, for the first time in two years being completely lazy, but figuring I deserved it; I'd barely stopped to eat or sleep for the last couple of years, and I had a feeling that there were some rough times on the not too distant horizon. Just before ten I remembered that Billy had said he was going to invite Bella and Charlie to go over to the Clearwater's with him. I wondered if she was still there; I had a sudden urge to see her, just to spend a moment with her, soaking in her scent and talking with her. I sent her a text asking if she was still on the Rez and if she wanted to stop by mine for a few minutes on her way home. When she text back that she'd be by in a little while I jumped up from the couch and quickly tidied away the debris from my lazy day on the couch, then headed out onto the porch with a beer to wait for her. As soon as the fresh air hit me I felt tired. I thought back to the days before I'd phased, a time when I was actually able to have a lazy day once in a while, and remembered that it had always been the same then. Lounging around and doing nothing had always seemed to tire me out somehow, and I always noticed it more once I got some fresh air. It was actually kind of nice to know that some things about me hadn't changed when I phased, that the old Sam was still there too.

I heard Bella's truck chugging up the hill log before I could see it. The engine was working hard to make it up the incline at all, and I was betting it wasn't managing much above ten miles an hour right then. I chuckled a little under my breath at that, and gave her a big grin as I rose to greet her.

"Hey." I said, leaning down to give her a light kiss on the lips. "Had a good day?" She hesitated for a moment or two before answering. "_Uh oh. That can't be a good sign." _I thought as I waited for her answer.

"My day was…. Interesting, I guess." She told me. "I had a row with Jake last night, and this evening I went with Charlie over to the Clearwater's place where I discovered that I'm really not the favourite person of quite a few of the other guests." I was pretty sure who one of the worst offenders of the evening would've been and I gave a small grimace.

"Shit. Did Leah give you a hard time?" I asked. I had always made a point of giving Leah no reason to hope for anything from me, but as far as I could tell from things I was told, she persisted in believing we'd get back together one day. I couldn't imagine that she'd be too friendly to Bella if she'd heard the two of us were dating – even if it was just a casual thing.

"A little." She admitted. "Paul and Rachel don't seem to be my biggest fans either." She added with a rueful smile. "I can understand Rachel not wanting to be disloyal to her best friend or new boyfriend, but I really can't for the life of me work out what Paul's issue with me is." We walked inside and sat side by side on my couch. "It's not that bad." She hastily assured me, "I can deal with it. Not everyone has to like me. I just wish I knew what I'd done to upset Paul so I can apologise." I was amazed at the amount of shit that could happen in just a few hours _"Doing well with the no drama clause already, aren't I? Her best friend has a fight with her over me, then I have to tell him he can see her for a while, then one of my friends is rude and dismissive of her and encourages others to behave the same way, and then my ex-girlfriend confronts her and, if I know Leah at all, tore a verbal strip off her. Fuck. I hope she's not here to tell me it's not going to work out."_ The last thought had me in a mild state of panic which I was struggling to keep off my face. I was also trying to keep my anger at Paul in check. With the Alpha order he wasn't able to actually say anything disrespectful _to_ her, but he was more than capable of being disrespectful _about _her, and it seemed he could _behave_ in a rude and hurtful way if he chose to. I really didn't want to have to issue another order to him, he'd be little more than a puppet if I kept it up, but I just didn't know how to keep him civil to the woman I was dating. Of course I couldn't tell her all of that, so I glossed over the facts with a generality that was true, but not all of the truth.

"Paul has anger issues, Bella. It's probably easiest to just let it go and accept that the two of you just aren't going to get along." I wasn't really happy with that plan, but Paul was Sam's friend, so I had to believe he knew what he was talking about. I nodded in reluctant agreement.

"Well the no drama rule is a little on the frayed side already" She said and I tensed up immediately, worried that I'd been right and she was about to call things off. To my relief, she continued "but I'm dealing with the animosity just fine, so unless you want to stop thing between us?"

"NO!" I almost shouted, then blushed and went on in a calmer voice. "No, I don't want to call it off already. I'm looking forward to spending some time with you. I reached into her lap and took hold of her hand, intertwining our fingers and using the fingers of my other hand to gently stroke her knuckles. She smiled up at me.

"Good then." She said. "I'm looking forward to that too." We sat there quietly for a few minutes, just enjoying the quiet and each other's company.

"Are you coming to the Rec centre tomorrow afternoon?" I asked her. "It's tutoring night, but I'm sure I can arrange it so that you don't have to deal with Paul."

"Yeah I'll be there." She said. "Actually, I was going to give you something to give to Paul. "It's in my truck. I'll grab it out just before I leave." I gave her an enquiring look and she explained. "It's just a few leaflets about dyslexia and the problems it can cause with school, as well as the information for a testing centre he could go to if he wanted and find out if dyslexia is what's holding him back. I figured it would go over a lot better if it was coming from you and not me." I chuckled a little.

"You're not wrong there. He'd get all defensive and proud if you gave him the literature, and then just throw the lot of it out instead of looking at it. I think you're probably right though. I'll pass the stuff on to him." She smiled and leant into my side, relaxing me once again

"This was just what I needed after this evening, thanks Sam." She murmured. I bent a little and kissed the top of her head, resting my face in her hair and staying like that or a few moments, just breathing and taking her wonderful scent in.

"Yeah. Me too." I whispered. She lifted her face to look at me and I bent to give her a soft kiss. The tingling returned to my lips and she pressed hers harder against mine and I made a quiet sound of approval. She began to open her mouth a little, inviting me to deepen the kiss and enter with my tongue and as much as I wanted to accept the invitation, I had to regretfully pull back.

"We don't have long before Charlie will be expecting you home." I said. "If we let this kiss go the way the last one did, I don't think I'd be able to let you go for a few hours at least." She pouted adorably, pulling her lower lip right out. I just gave a little laugh and gently flicked at her lower lip.

"If you'd like, we could hang out here after the drop-in centre tomorrow, watch a movie or something?" I offered. "I don't have much food in right now, but we could always order pizza."

"Or I could cook, if you don't mind me rummaging around in your kitchen?" She suggested. I couldn't believe my luck.

"Do you think you could make some more of your amazing lasagne?" I asked eagerly. "I've never tasted anything as good as that." She laughed.

"Sure. I've got to stop in at the Rez shop for groceries anyway. I'll pick up why I need while I'm there. You want me to make a really big one so you can freeze a few portions?" My grin widened.

"You serious?" I asked "Hell yeah. Yes, please. I'd have to keep it hidden from Jared whenever he comes by – I honestly think he'd fight me for it if he knew I had some, but that'd be really great!" I gave her a hug. "I knew there was a reason I was keeping you around." She laughed again.

"Well I do still owe you two favours apparently, so I guess now we're down to one?" She asked. There was no way I was going to let her get away with that; I was saving those favours up for special occasions. The shower fantasy made a brief appearance in my mind before I quickly chased it out.

"Oh no you don't. That doesn't count as one of the two – you're going to be eating with me so you can't use that as a payoff." She pouted once again.

"But then how am I ever going to get square with you?" She asked playfully.

"I'll think of something" I told her, pulling her in tight against my body. My voice grew low and husky, almost a growl. "After all." I said "I wouldn't want you to be in debt to me now, would I?" The shower fantasy forced its way back into my head, refusing to be chased out so quickly this time and she swallowed, probably able to clearly see the lust in my eyes. I moved in for a kiss and at the last second she turned her head so I caught her on her cheek.

"Now, now." She said "I've got to be going, remember. I groaned in frustration. Giving me a quick peck on the lips, she stood and walked towards the door.

"I'll see you at the drop-in centre tomorrow then?"

"Sure. Tomorrow." I answered, standing myself to walk her out to her truck. After one last little kiss she climbed in and, with a little wave, drove home.

I kept my word the next day at the drop-in centre by making sure Paul worked with me so that Bella would definitely be able to avoid him. I gave him the dyslexia information without telling him where I'd gotten it, and we read through it together after his initial negative reaction had passed. Once Paul and I had finished up his assignment, I went over to where Bella was still working with Colin and Brady, two 9th graders who I'd noticed recently were showing alarming signs of being likely to phase. I was hoping that it wouldn't happen – they were both so young and it wouldn't be fair for them to miss out on so much of childhood by phasing so early and having to take on adult responsibilities. They both had the bloodlines to be potential wolves though, and so I encouraged their visits to the drop-in centre as much as I could without creating suspicion so that I could keep an eye on their physical development, and also so I could get to know them, and they me in case they ever did phase. It would go easier on them if they didn't feel they were suddenly amongst strangers.

"She's not working you guys too hard, is she?" I asked the boys with a grin.

"Nah, we're cool." Collin replied

"She can work me as hard as she wants." Brady said cheekily, giving Bella a little smirk. I fought down my inappropriately jealous reaction and just gave him a light tap on the back of the head.

"Watch yourself there, kid. I don't want to have to hurt you." I moved to stand directly behind Bella, putting both my hands on her shoulders and leaning down to plant a kiss on the top of her head. I had managed to fight off my jealous over-reaction to Brady's inept flirting, but I couldn't help but give a little display of possessiveness. I just hoped she either wouldn't notice or wouldn't mind too much. From the table the two of us had been working on over in the corner, Paul gave a disgusted snort of derision. I shot him an angry, warning look. Paul scowled and, picking up his books, stalked out of the room.

"Oh. Sorry, Sam. I didn't know she was spoken for." Brady apologised, looking a little nervous at having upset me.

"Well now you do, so try not to drool all over poor Bella" I replied. I knew she'd definitely notice that as a territorial claim, and again could only hope she didn't mind too much. She blushed a little, and then I got a faint but definite hint of that delicious arousal scent from her. _"Hmmm. She really does seem to like the whole cave man thing." _I thought, remembering too her reaction to me grabbing a fistful of her hair in the parking lot on our date. The smell of her arousal, combined with the memory of the parking lot kiss and my realisation about her liking of dominant displays had me clearing my suddenly dry throat and hardening in my cut-offs instantly. For what felt like the thousandth time since meeting her, I had to resort to the freshman classic and shove my hands roughly into my pockets to hide my hard-on.

"Well anyway, It's time to start wrapping things up now. Can you boys manage the assignment yourselves from here?" I asked them, and when they nodded cheerfully I told them. "Ok then. So you wanna grab up your stuff then? Bella and I need to lock up here and she's promised me some more of her famous lasagne. At this my stomach growled loudly enough for everyone to hear. "And as you can hear, I'm one hungry guy!" We all laughed lightly, and the boys started collecting up their books

When we got to my place I let her pick out the movie from the selection I'd gotten together and I was pleased when she asked if we could watch more than one – she was obviously as eager to spend time with me as I was with her.

"If you don't have to be rushing off this evening, I'm happy to watch as many of them as you like." I said. "Do you have a curfew on weekends?" She shook her head.

"No. Charlie's pretty cool as long as I let him know where I am and let him know what sort of time I aim to be back." She told me. "On the weekends anyway. He's a bit tougher on school nights

"Great. Then it's entirely up to you. I'd be happy to keep you up all night." She immediately blushed, so I quickly added. "To watch movies, I meant. Not anything to do with sex….. Not that I wouldn't be happy to keep you up all night with sex, but…I …we….you…it." I finally managed to get my mouth to stop moving and spilling out more embarrassing word vomit. I sounded like a desperate freshman and was even blushing. "Sorry. Just ignore all that rambling, would you?" I asked and took a breath. "What I meant to say was, I'd be really happy if we sat up all night watching movies, or talking, or pretty much anything. I'd really enjoy your company."

"What rambling?" She asked, letting him off the hook. "I didn't notice any rambling." We both laughed. "So how about I get the dinner started off cooking, and we watch 'Time Bandits while the lasagne is cooking?" She suggested. I was happy to take the change of subjects and nodded, bending to pick up the correct DVD.

I really loved watching her work in the kitchen. That awkward clumsiness that seemed to plague her all the rest of the time was nowhere in evidence and she moved in a grateful dace, chopping, browning and stirring. I was beautiful to see. I made the mistake only once of trying to nab a taste while she had her back turned. She caught me without even turning around, seeming to just know that I was reaching towards the pile of chopped mushrooms she had sitting on the chopping board, waiting to be added to the tomato sauce.

"I'd stop right there, before I got a hot, sauce covered spoon slapped across the back of my hand if I were you." She told me without bothering to even turn her head. I was taken completely by surprise both by her perception in catching me, and at the seeming seriousness of her threat. I hadn't thought she'd have it in her to so much as swat a fly.

"Are you serious?" I asked

"Does a bear shit in the woods?" She responded, the same tone of voice, the same phrasing as my mom, hell it was even the same sort of situation I might've gotten busted in by mom. My surprised laughter burst out of me.

"My mom says that one too." I told her between chuckles.

"Sounds like a sensible woman." She grinned over her shoulder at me. She was right too. Mom was a sensible woman, though she'd never taken any nonsense, and I seriously thought that if they ever got the chance to meet they'd like each other instantly. If it wasn't for the Leah situation that it. As it was, my mom was so hung up on the idea of having Leah in the family that I genuinely thought I could bring home Miss Native American USA, with a degree in medicine and another in Native American history and she'd still not be happy with me.

Finally Bella had things in the kitchen far enough along that we could go start on the movies and we went into the living room and sat on my huge, comfy couch. As the film started, I pulled her over to sit on my lap. She looked up, startled at the sudden move and I gave her a warm smile.

"This ok?" I asked. She nodded, and I got yet another waft of her arousal as she wriggled a little on my lap, trying to get a little friction where she most needed it. Of course this caused her ass to brush firmly against the hard-on I was once again sporting and I gave a small moan. She quickly froze her movements.

"Sorry." We both spoke at the same time and I gave a little chuckle.

"Maybe I shouldn't have done that; it's gonna be kind of hard to concentrate on the movie now." She snorted in amusement even as she blushed.

"I'm sure we can handle it." She answered with a raised brow. It was my turn to give a snort.

"If you insist." I said, and determined to win this little game she had just started, I leant back against the back of the couch and made my face pleasantly blank, turning my face towards the TV screen and pretending to be completely unaffected by her presence on my lap. "We'll see." I added. A little disgruntled, she went to slide off my lap but I firmed my arms around her, a gentle but iron tough cage round her waist keeping her from leaving my lap.

Clearing her own face of expression, she stopped trying to leave my lap, instead wriggling more firmly back into my hard on, deliberately teasing me against her ass. _"Fuck. I might've miscalculate here." _I thought. _"I'm not sure I can win this game." _Her arousal spiked again, which combined with the feel of her ass grinding into my hard cock, dragged a quite groan from between my clenched teeth. She looked up with fake innocence.

"You ok?" She fluttered her eyelashes a bit.

"Just fine, thanks." I ground out through my clenched jaw, and she turned back to the screen and somehow managed to successfully combine watching the movie unconcernedly with an occasional, well timed wriggle of her ass whenever she felt my hard-on soften a little. After about the fifth time she'd pulled this little trick, I couldn't take it anymore. My hands dropped to her hips and when she tried it next, my hands suddenly firmed, holding her lower body completely still against me. What I had thought was a clever move turned out to be a big mistake as once again my forceful dominant action caused another rush of her arousal. Her tiny moan was echoed by mine as I rapidly sped to a loss of control. She was going to win. Losing concentration for a moment, my grip lessened for a fraction of a second and she quickly shifted her hips, rubbing against me and providing herself with a little friction the same time without her expression or her attention on the screen wavering for a second. I threw my head back against the couch cushions and muttered.

"For fuck's sake, you've got to be kidding me." She finally turned to face me.

"Shhhh. I can't hear what they're saying." She said, gesturing at the TV and pretending to be disgruntled. I let out a low growl, giving up on the game and leaned towards her for a kiss. I could've strangled her at that moment, because instead of graciously accepting my defeat, she pulled back, and struggled out of my lap to stand up in front of me. I looked up in confusion, frustration and concern.

"Time to build the lasagne." She said with a cheeky grin, and when I flopped back against the cushions in frustration she gave an all-out laugh and headed for the kitchen. After a few minutes of trying to talk my erection down, I headed off to the bathroom to give my dick a cold water bath treatment. It worked, eventually, but it didn't do anything to ease my frustration. _"Who knew that she could be such a tease?" _I thought to myself. _"I bet she's really amazing in bed." _I quickly cut that thought off before it could develop into an all-out fantasy that would have me running the cold tap again, and joined her in the kitchen.

"Better now?" She asked cheekily. I shook his head ruefully.

"You, woman, are a health hazard, you know that?" Her grin widened.

"Well thank you, I'm taking that as a compliment." She said

"Oh it was." I assured her. I hopped up onto the counter next to her. "Can we call a truce for now? Much as I'm enjoying myself, it'd be nice to calm down and relax a little." I asked. "Well at least for a while, anyway." I gave her an evil little smile and she gulped. I was going to step up my game in the next round, and see how she handled that. I wasn't sure if I was going to take it to the ultimate conclusion and sleep with her that night, it was a little too soon perhaps, but if she offered I certainly wasn't going to turn her down.

"Ok, a truce it is." She answered and when she was done with what she was doing in the kitchen again, we wandered back into the sitting room to watch more of the movie. This time I didn't pull her into my lap, I wasn't stupid enough to make the same mistake twice, but instead I wrapped my arm around her waist and let her settle into my side, her head resting on my chest.

When dinner was ready, we ate together on the couch, watching the next movie and when we'd finished eating, I was too full, comfortable and relaxed to move from the couch so I just took our plates and put them on the floor, swinging my legs round, then lifting her up easily, and arranged us both on the couch in a sort of spoons position, my back pressed against the cushions of the huge comfy couch and her pressed against the front of my body, her head resting on one of my upper arms. She was clearly as comfortable and relaxed as me and before the movie finished she had drifted off to sleep. I was feeling pretty drowsy myself, but before I drifted off to sleep I figure I'd better let Charlie know that Bella had fallen asleep and ask what he wanted me to do. I didn't relish the thought of waking her and taking her home, but if it was what Charlie wanted me to do then I would, rather than get on the wrong side of Bella's father. Picking up my cell, I sent his a quick text, telling him Bella was asleep on the couch and asking if I should wake her. After less than a minute I got a reply from him saying he was going to stay at Billy's for the night so I should just let her sleep if that was ok with me. He did warn me though that I shouldn't take advantage of his little girl. I was almost insulted at the suggestion that I would behave that badly, but then I figured it was his job as her dad to say it, and I couldn't really fault him on that. Having let him know where Bella was sending the night, I settled down behind her, my face buried in her hair, and fell asleep myself.

I don't know what time it was when we woke, but she suddenly sat upright, seeming to be panicking about something.

"Charlie!" She gasped, pulling me further from my own sleep.

"Wassa matter?" I slurred sleepily.

"I didn't let my dad know when I'd be back, and I'm…" She looked at the time on her cell, "nearly two hours later than I'd said I'd probably be."

"It's ok." I told her, sitting up and putting my hand over her on her cell. "When you drifted off I texted him and told him you'd fallen asleep on the couch. He said not to wake you as he was planning on staying at Billy's for the night anyway to get an early start fishing tomorrow." I rubbed her shoulders reassuringly. "You can take my bed if you want, and I'll sleep out here." Pulling her up from the couch, I led her to my room. She sleepily toed off her shoes and flopped straight down on top of the covers. Chuckling at her, I lifted her legs and pulled the covers back, tucking her legs beneath them and pulling them up to her chin. I leaned down and kissed her gently, squeezing one of her hands.

"Night, Bella." I said, and, much as I didn't want to leave her, looking so beautiful and dishevelled in _my bed_, I turned to leave the room. She didn't let go of my hand though. As I reached the full stretch of her arm, when I expected her to let go and let her arm drop, she instead tugged me back gently.

"Stay with me?" she asked me. "I was so warm and comfortable wrapped up in you on the couch. Will you come hold me like that now too?" I was torn for a second; I'd told Charlie that I wouldn't take advantage of her, and somehow this felt like a violation of that, but on the other hand, I wasn't going to do anything but sleep next to her, and it had been her that asked, not me. I made my decision. Walking back to the bed, I sat down on the edge and crawled under the covers with her, turning her onto her side and tucking her back up against my front in much the same position as we'd been in on the couch.

"None of your funny business now, Miss Swan." I teased. "It seems we could both use some sleep as we drifted off before the second movie even finished." She gave a sleepy giggle and agreed.

"Promise." She said, clearly already drifting off. I watched her falling asleep in my arms, warmed and comforted by her presence and as she lay there with a peaceful smile on her sleeping face, I couldn't help but follow her into slumber myself, happy and completely at peace for the first time in forever.


	28. Chapter 27: Dreaming and Screaming

**Sorry about the long wait on this chapter everyone; I wrote and re-wrote it three times before I was happy enough with it to post it, and I'm still anxiously hiding behind the furniture as I click on "Submit Document". This is because it's the first of the long awaited, and much avoided by me, lemons. The first I've ever written and seriously, who knew it could be so tricky to get it right?**

**So please be warned; this chapter contains naughtiness of the girl and boy variety. If you're offended by such things, or if you're too young to read them, please skip it, rather than reading it and then complaining. But then again if you're either of the above, goodness only knows why you're reading my story at all as it's clearly rated MA and I put warnings in the summary to keep just such people out! :0D**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 27: Dreaming and Screaming

Bella POV

I was standing in the clearing again. _Our _clearing, the flowers all still died back from the winter and a chill in the air. I was all alone, the silence that seemed to echo around me was complete, not even the tiniest bird noise to cut through it. I slowly spun on the spot, looking all around me, curious as to why I was here, but not feeling the pain I might've expected to feel upon being in that place without _Him. _A twig breaking somewhere in the forest behind me made me jump, spinning in the air to see what had broken he almost deafening silence. I could see nothing, yet something inside me told me to stay completely still and wait. One, two, three minutes went past and nothing appeared. I went to move, but from my right, the suddenly present Taha Aki spoke.

"Wait." He said, placing his finer against my lips to keep me from speaking. "The time approaches, the beginning of the new." He'd always seemed serious before, but now there was an added gravity to his words that couldn't be ignored. I couldn't doubt that this time he was showing me or telling me something terribly, terribly important.

Another me appeared in the clearing and I was once again shown the dream scenes of me/not me with the faceless vampire. In each different version not me was killed, until me/not me once again appeared confident and relaxed, talking with the vampire. I watched as the vampire froze and looked back over his shoulder, surprised and fearful, just like the last time I'd been shown this scene, and then the scene faded out once again, to be replaced by another familiar location which I would've thought would bring me pain, and yet just filled me with memories. The baseball field where I'd first seen Victoria and James. I was alone again, but suddenly out of the silence, a badly injured wolf appeared off to my right, as if thrown there by something incredibly strong. It thrashed and whined in agony, tearing at the ground with teeth and claws and as I stood there watching in horror, a second and then third wolf appeared in the same way. One was clearly already dead, its throat torn out and eyes staring unseeing into the abyss, the other was barely breathing, bloody snotty bubbles frothing from its nose as its last few breaths rattled in its huge chest. As I stood there in terror, wolf after wolf in various stages of dying were thrown into view, one crushed inwards like a discarded coke can, one with limbs missing. Around my feet were all five of the wolves I'd seen before, their fur matted with mud and blood and all of them dying. Around me I could hear the sounds of several more crashing to the ground, and I could see their blood spilling onto the dirt, but I couldn't see the wolves themselves, despite the fact that they sounded close enough to trip over. As the whining and gurgling breaths finally silenced, I could hear a small panicked voice crying over and over.  
"No no no no no no no no no no no." It took me a few moments to realise the voice was coming from me. My head snapped round to stare at Taha Aki, who was mournfully surveying the scene.

"This is what's destined? What will happen if I find the wolves and ask for help?" I asked in horror. "I can't do this to them. I can't have them all wiped out just to protect me."

"No, Young one. This is not destiny." He answered in a gentle tone. "This is just one possibility if you choose the wrong path. Somehow that didn't make me feel much better. A wrong choice by me could lead to _this._

"So how do I keep this from happening?" I asked desperately, "How do I know when I'm making the _right _choices?" His face became expectant, waiting, it seemed for me to make my own conclusion. My phrasing hit me a split second later. "The _right_ choices" I whispered to myself, realising what I'd inadvertently revealed to myself. "But I can't always take an hour or so to put myself into a meditative trance so I can think things through." I pointed out. He nodded.  
"That is why you need to stop just _knowing _and start a_ccepting, _Young one." He told me firmly. "Until you do, you will always need a dream or meditation to think the _right_ thoughts. But after you _accept_, you will find yourself able to make great leaps of knowing in any state of being." He turned and looked at all of the dead wolves with a terrible sadness. "The time has come for you to learn this before it is too late." He gestured at the scene before us. The scene faded again and this time we were standing in the forest, watching the middle aged man I'd dreamed of before clutching at his chest and dropping to the ground. "Some knowledge will affect a few lives" he told me as the scene re-set and me/not me accompanied the man into the forest as I had the last time I'd dreamed this. "And some knowledge will affect a whole nation." The scene faded once more and I was suddenly in the middle of modern day La Push, surrounded by screaming Quileutes young and old as one after another were killed violently by unseen hands. In complete horror I turned to stare at Taha Aki, his face filled with ancient grief.

"Is _this _another possibility if I make the wrong choice?" I asked him

"It is, Young One. But the possibilities if you make the _right _choices are so very beautiful and wonderful. The world isn't only filled with blood and pain. You can have so much more if you can learn acceptance." The scene thankfully faded away once more and we were on First Beach, near to the tide pools. Right at the end of the pools were three small children and their parents. The youngest child was sitting in one of the pools, crying until the father picked her up and threw her high above his head, causing her to squeal and shriek with laughter as the older two children clamoured around their father, begging for their turn and the mother stood by laughing. I was too far away to see the faces of any of the family, but I could almost _feel _the happiness and love pouring from the small group, making me smile, remembering the times when I'd visited the pools with Charlie when I was a little kid myself. It was a simple little scene but no less stirring for being short and sweet, and as the scene faded again, I carried the warm feeling it had given with me.

We were back in the darkened room again, the now familiar sounds of panting and groaning in the background. I was instantly reminded of the kiss Sam and I had shared in the parking lot on our date, and my mind was busily filling in the sensations that me/not me would be feeling as naked sweaty Sam kissed her, ran his hands over her skin, and grabbed a handful of her hair. I almost forgot Taha Aki's presence completely as I became absorbed in watching sweaty naked me/not me and sweaty naked Sam writhing together. He touched my arm to get my attention,

"Yeah, yeah, Taha Aki, I know; '_Watch'!"_ I said distractedly, vaguely aware of his snort of amusement. I ignored him once again, knowing already that he wasn't also watching; he'd always made a point of turning his attention away from the couple once I'd made it clear that him watching made me uncomfortable. The scene grew more and more intense, the usual writhing, groaning and screaming finally culminating in the bite and the roar of "MINE!" from Sam. I was dripping wet myself, panting and moaning slightly, almost on the verge of orgasm just from watching the couple and I wondered if sex with Sam would be as intense as the sex that me/not me had with her Sam. As I came back to myself a little, I was relieved to note that Taha Aki was over by the window, looking out on the group of wolves outside, rather than paying any attention to either the naked couple or me. I walked over to join him at the window and he turned to smile at me.

"Wake now, Young One." Taha Aki told me. "You have work that needs to be done." He rested his hand on the top of my head as if blessing me, and then he himself faded away, leaving me alone in the darkness. My eyes shot open and I sat up in bed, my eyes searching around the room wildly for a few seconds until I realised where I was. _"Sam's bed. It's ok, I'm still at Sam's." _I told myself, lying back down for a moment as I caught my breath.

Suddenly realising that Sam wasn't asleep next to me, I got up and shambled off to look for him, trying to tame my wild and unruly hair as I went. The sound of almost frantically banging pans from the kitchen, along with the smell of burning gave me a good hint as to where I might find him. I wandered in to find him in his usual pair of cut-offs without a shirt, his short hair all tousled and damp from the shower. There were beads of water still dripping off his head and onto his broad shoulders and muscular, smooth chest, making me want to trace the lines they made down his skin with my tongue. As I walked in, he was throwing a smoking frying pan into the sink, muttering under his breath and then grabbing a cup of coffee off the kitchen counter and spinning around to offer it to me wild eyed and looking slightly panicked.

"Oh…. Umm…. Morning, Bella. Sleep ok?" He stammered as I accepted the coffee cup and took a big sip.

"Great, thanks." I replied with a smile and a blush. "How about you?" to my surprise he blushed himself and started back up with the stammering.

"Y-yeah, just f-fine thanks." He cleared his throat. "I erm, tried to get a decent breakfast together for you, but seeing as how I can burn water, it didn't go so well." He gestured sheepishly towards the sink where the smoking pan was by this point sizzling slightly under the flow of the cold water and gave a little chuckle. I couldn't help but giggle along with him. "But I do a rocking line in cereal if you want some." He grabbed a box of Cheerio's from a cupboard and I nodded.

"That'd be fine, really, but I appreciate the attempt." He grinned at me and I returned it as he took a sip of his own coffee. "Do you mind if I take a shower first though? You're so hot, you had me dripping all night." He choked a little, coffee coming out of his nose and I suddenly burst into flames as I realised just exactly what I'd just said. "NO! I mean… I didn't….. I meant….. Oh Fuck it." I put both my hands in my face and stood there shaking my head as he combined choking on his coffee and laughing his ass off. "Ok well once again I've managed to embarrass the hell out of myself, so with that I'm going to go shower and see if I can wash my shame away in the process." I stated with as much dignity as I could muster, making him laugh even harder, throwing his head back and really howling in mirth. I was once again struck by how beautiful he was when he really let go and gave into the moment, his face worry-line free and his straight white teeth gleaming in contrast to his russet skin. With a steadying breath I mustered all my strength and dignity and turned to walk off to the bathroom, leaving Sam still laughing behind me in the kitchen.

Closing the bathroom door behind me, I leant back against it, breathing deep and still trying to pull myself together. It seemed that the slightest thing made me more and more attracted to him and I was beginning to wonder just how much longer my virginity was going to last. It wasn't that I was _trying _to hold onto especially; in fact a part of me had already decided that not only was I willing to part with it, but that Sam was the ideal candidate for assisting in the endeavour. It was more a nervousness about actually doing it, and a lingering fear of rejection left over from when _He _left. I rolled my eyes to myself as I undressed for the shower, recalling the times I all but threw myself and my virginity at _Him _only to be turned down. I understood _why _I was turned down, but that really didn't do much to ease the feeling of rejection I'd experienced and a big part of me was paranoid that the same thing would happen with Sam; that I'd throw myself at him only to be politely yet firmly turned down, and even though I was now able to think of the past rejections by _Him _with only a twinge of the old echoing chest pain, I was still fearful that a repeat of the same from Sam would send me plummeting back into the pit once more. I tied up my hair to keep it out of the water, studiously ignoring the niggling worry in the back of my mind. _"You know, if you're worrying that Sam turning you down would send you back into the pit, it's a pretty good sign that you feel a lot more for him than you should." _My mind was trying to tell me. I refused to listen; we had set out clear guidelines for our relationship, each of us for our own reasons, and I wasn't going to allow myself to be in danger of falling for someone who I couldn't possibly allow myself to get in too deep with for his own good, and especially not when that same person had made it very clear that they weren't interested in that sort of relationship themselves. That way could only lead to total emotional breakdown. I stepped into the shower and turned on the water.

I screamed.

The water was like ice. Each drop cut through me like a needle made of ice, making my skin feel like it was burning. I fumbled at the controls, unsure whether my unthinking hands were attempting to turn the hot water up, or turn the shower off completely, and a few seconds later, the question became completely irrelevant to my confused mind, as the door burst inwards with a loud crack and a flurry of splinters, and a naked Sam shot into the room shoulder first, shaking and growling lowly under his breath and casting wild eyes about the room in his urgency to find the danger I guessed. _"Holy FUCK!" _was the first thing that went through my head, as independently of me, my eyes raked over his naked form, taking in his shaking, semi-aroused nakedness from head to toe. On the second pass, my eyes stalled at his huge cock, which when he'd burst in had been half hard, but was rapidly growing harder and longer under my scrutiny. Obviously as a healthy, heterosexual teenaged girl, I'd seen pictures of naked men during my bouts of curiosity, but I'd never seen the real thing, and I could only guess that what Sam was packing was _way _beyond the average equipment. A slight groan from his direction caused my eyes to lift, dragging over his deliciously cut abs, his wide muscular chest, his strong broad shoulders and finally stopping at his face which was sporting a curious mix of shock, embarrassment and pure lust as he stared back at me, his eyes doing the same boy-raking manoeuvres over my own body that my eyes had been doing over his. Finally his eye met mine and he breathed in sharply through his nose, the lust I could see in his face increasing and hardening his expression. On auto pilot, my hand reached out and shut off the shower with a simple twist which had been completely beyond me a few moments before, and as if my movement had freed up his own, he took a step forward, then another and a graceful, predatory stalking glide. My brain was shutting down, leaving only my basic animal urges behind, but as it made its exit, a strange mundane thought flittered through. _"I wonder what he was doing after I left him in the kitchen that left him naked and hard when he burst in here?" _The thought was gone before I could give it any notice whatsoever, to be replaced with image after image of my sex dream scenes, increasing my own arousal and causing heat and moisture to gather at my core. He gave another sharp inhale through his nose, followed by a low rumbling growl that shot straight to my clit, setting it throbbing and I couldn't help but take the last few steps between us myself, clashing our bodies together in a frenzy of sucking, licking and biting mouths and grasping, clawing hands.

After the frigid water, the scorching heat of his naked body pressed tightly against mine was almost painful on my skin, but still I pressed myself more firmly to him, my pebbled nipples brushing against him and sending electric signals straight to my clit, causing me to moan and rock against his thigh which had worked its way between mine. His answering moan as his erection pressed into my belly sent shivers down my spine and I clawed against his back, trying to pull him ever closer to me. One of his hands ran up my spine to tangle roughly into my hair and pull my head back, exposing my neck to him and he dragged his mouth away from mine and began to suck and nibble his way from my collar bone up to my jaw as I groaned in approval.

"Oh God!" I moaned huskily and his mouth grew rougher against my skin, sucking what was sure to become a dark bruise into my neck where it joined my shoulder. He turned us and backed me forcefully against the wall, the cold tiles hard against my shoulders and ass and I arched my back to press myself harder into him. Leaving my neck now, he began kissing his way downwards, pausing to nip at my collarbones again and finally the scorching heat enveloped my left nipple, his right hand finding the other and pinching it hard, almost too hard, yet at the same time bringing nothing but electric pleasure. As if my nipples were hard wired to my pussy, I felt myself get impossibly hotter and wetter and it seemed that he was somehow able to tell as our groans of approval came simultaneously. His teeth grazed against the hardened bud, sharpening the pleasure until it teetered on the edge of pain, and then his hands and mouth switched, my right nipple now the one engulfed in hot wetness and my left now being pinched and rolled between his fingers. Incoherent sounds left my mouth as I tried simultaneously to tell him how much I loved what he was doing and beg for more, but he seemed to understand what I meant and continued what he was doing.

"Mmm. Ahhh. Fuck. Oh FUCK! Sam!" I babbled, with no control whatsoever over the noises I was making. The growling and groaning coming from him only served to make me hotter still, and finally, when it seemed my entire body had lost all co-ordination and my brain was ready to dribble out of my ears, his mouth left my breast and travelled downwards once more, leaving a hot wet trail down my body as he zeroed in on his target. I was vaguely aware of my weak protests, not at first understanding what he was intending, and then my protests stopped as his mouth finally made contact with my painfully throbbing clit, sucking and licking and lightly nibbling until I lost all control and came with a loud scream.

"AHHHHHH! OHHHH SHIT! FUUUCK!" My voice echoed off the bathroom walls and my knees gave out as I sank to the floor, dragging him down to eventually lie on top of me. I lay gasping and shaking, completely out of touch with my own mind as I attempted to recover from this first ever orgasm from someone else's hands, or mouth as the case was, trying to collect myself. However it seemed he was not even close to done. One large, strong, hot hand ran up my thigh, and then I felt hot fingers parting my nether lips as his tongue one again began to circle my over-sensitive clit, dragging more, almost painful sensation from my body. I spasmed and shuddered, unable to make any sound but grunts I might later be embarrassed over making as one long finger pressed inside me, only to withdraw and be replaced by two pressing back in again. _"Oh fuck. Am I ready for this?"_ I briefly found the awareness to wonder as sudden realisation hit me; he wasn't planning on stopping, although I was sure he would if I asked, he was meaning to fuck me, and I had, in all honesty and fairness, been sending signals that I was ready to do just that, albeit unintentionally. Realising I had just seconds left to call this to a halt, I suddenly achieved a crystal clarity of thought. _"If I call this off right now, he'll either feel like he was pressuring me too hard, which he wasn't; I'm just as responsible for this as he is, or he'll think I'm nothing but a prick tease and now I've got mine, I'm leaving him high and dry. Either way he'll feel just as rejected as I did all those times with Edward." _I knew that really this was no basis on which to go ahead with having sex, especially for the first time, and had those been my only reasons, I believed I would've stopped him, but it was undeniable that I wanted him too, it was really just my own fear of rejection and my adolescent fantasies of my first time being a canopied bed, candle-lit, idealised perfection rather than this frenzied, desperate, bathroom floor experience that was holding me back. I made my decision. _"I'm ready. It doesn't matter where we are, or how this started, my body is crying out for this, and I can't deny that it's crying out for _Sam _in particular, so why shouldn't we both have this?" _His fingers curled upwards and rubbed against something that made me sit up and scream in pleasure, coming again, harder than I ever had before, as his mouth sucked almost painfully hard on my clit. I felt a rush of hot wetness from between my thighs and for a second I thought that I'd lost all control of myself and peed on him, but before I could make my mouth work properly to make a mortified apology, I heard him moan loudly in pleasure.

"Oh fuck yes, baby, that's right, cum for me. Soak me. Fuck that's so fucking hot! I'm covered in your cum." Realising with relief that I hadn't in fact lost control of my bladder, and that he apparently like the fact that I'd cum hard enough to quirt over him, I allowed myself to get lost in the sensations he'd created and I was so close to blacking out completely that I almost missed his swift slide up my body and didn't have time to get nervous at the realisation that he was about to enter me. My hair was completely covering my face, plastered down across my cheeks with sweat so I it seems I was able to hide my wince as he plunged deep into me in one thrust, my hymen breaking and giving way instantly to his onslaught, and I found myself biting into his shoulder to muffle my scream of pain. Apparently he liked that too, and he growled loudly, both of his hands coming up, one to rest on the floor beside my shoulder and the other to drag my hair out of my face and into his fist. Hiding my pain, I looked up into his face and saw him clenching his jaw so tightly I wouldn't have been surprised to hear his teeth cracking and he stilled for a few moments, muttering through his teeth.

"OhfuckmeBellayou'resofucking_tight_!" he garbled, his fist gripping my hair tighter a he seemed to be fighting for control, fighting to hold still for a moment to allow me to adjust to his length buried deep inside me. I forced myself to relax, to allow my inner walls to become accustomed to the stretched feeling and gradually it felt less painful and invasive and more welcome. I shifted my hips a little, experimenting to see if I could get a bit of friction both inside my pussy and against my clit. My movement dragged a long, desperate groan from him.

"Fuck, Bella. You need to keep still or I'm going to lose it too quick. You're so fucking tight, shit I've never felt anything this good in my life." He moaned and I felt a little smile turn up one side of my mouth. Feeling mischievous suddenly, I clenched my walls a little, causing his jaw to clench even tighter and his eyes to slam shut. "PLEASE, Bella. _Please. _You've got to stop that or I'm not gonna last more than a minute here. Baby, please. Oh fuckfuckfuck!" he cautioned and begged and I clenched once again. His control broke. With an animalistic roar, he pulled my head to one side by my hair and roughly sucked and nipped once more at the place where I thought he'd already bruised me with his mouth.

"So you're going to be naughty then? He asked in a lust roughened voice, his harsh authoritarian tone combined with his fisting of my hair had my own lust rising at light speed. Plunging into me hard and fast, driving me into the floor tiles, he grunted and groaned, pulling similar noises from me as we both rushed headlong towards the edge of our control. My hips rose to meet his every thrust and one of my legs lifted to give him yet deeper access and to hock around his lower back, pulling him back after ever retreat. Our rough movements caused us to travel across the floor, our sweat slick bodies making the movement impossible to resist if we'd tried and before long, my head was knocking against the base of the toilet. Had I been anywhere near my right mind at that point, I probably would've objected to the lack of dignity involved in losing my virginity while banging my head repeatedly against a toilet, but as it was I was too far gone in my own pleasure to even notice, much less object.

"Oh God. Oh Shit. Oh FUCK….. SAAAAM!" I screamed as I fell headlong over the edge, my vision darkening and my mind and body soaring away in waves of pure pleasure. His own roar of

"BELLAAAA!" joined my echoing screams as he joined me, his hips and my hips hammering against each other as both out bodies struggled to eke the last few scraps of pleasure before collapsing together on the tiled floor in a steaming, sweaty, sticky, panting, moaning mess.

It was several minutes before either of us moved. I was exhausted, physically, mentally and emotionally and I simply couldn't do anything other than lie there with the back of my head lifted against the base of the toilet and my arms and legs tangled together with Sam's. Eventually though, the weight of his huge body on top of mine was restricting my breathing so much that I had to shift a little to gain some breathing space and my movement caused him to come back to himself a bit and he rolled off me to one side. He raised his head from the crook of my shoulder where it had been resting and kissed me on the mouth surprisingly softly. Then laid his forehead on my shoulder. Still panting, he asked.

"So what was the screaming about?" I couldn't help it. I started to giggle, my laughter getting louder and louder as he joined in, both of us shaking with mirth, and it was several minutes before I was able to get enough control to reply.

"The shower." He looked at me confused. "It was fucking _freezing!_" I explained and he gave me a sheepish, apologetic smile.

"Oh. I thought someone had sneaked in and was attacking you or something." I snorted.

"Yeah I figured as much." He pushed himself up until he was sitting, reaching out to grab my hand and pull me up with him.

"I hadn't planned to do this with you this soon, and certainly not on the bathroom floor, but I'm not even going to pretend to be sorry." He said, looking me seriously in the eye. I smiled at him.

"I'm not sorry either." I said simply, "But if you could fix the water temperature for me, I'd _really _like that shower now." He grinned at me, completely relaxed.

"Sure sure." He said, reminding me for a moment of Jake, "You mind if I join you?" For a second I was embarrassed by the idea and a blush came to my cheeks. I figured though that shyness was ridiculous at that point so I willed the flaming cheeks away ad shrugged nonchalantly.

"Sure, that'd be nice."

"I love that you can still blush so innocently, even straight after that." He told me, running one finger over my reddened cheek, bringing the blush straight back again, and narrowing my eyes, I gave him a mock glare, sticking out my tongue at him playfully. He gave a snort of laughter and pushed himself up to his feet.

"I'm going to need a hand up, please." I told him. "I'm not sure my knees have come back online yet." He laughed again and help out a hand to help me up. I took it and he hauled me to my feet, holding me steady when, as predicted, my knees were still too jellied to keep me upright. With one arm around my waist he led me back over to the shower, and reached out to fiddle with the temperature before turning on the water and lifting me in to stand under the now deliciously warm fall of water. I gave an appreciative little groan and he stepped in himself, crowding up against me and reaching for the shampoo. Despite our intimate position, neither of us had it in us to make the shower another sexual episode, settling instead for relaxed and sensual, washing each other's bodies gently and him washing my hair for me. I was too short to be able to reach his hair to wash it, and when I suggested he kneel do I could reach he shook his head with a little smile.

"As exhausted as I am, I don't think I could kneel in front of you ad not dive in face first for a second round." He explained, making me blush once again, which in turn made him chuckle. As the water began to cool, we both stepped out and we towelled each other dry before I wrapped a towel around myself and one around my hair, and he tucked one around his hips.

"Is that cereal still up for grabs?" I asked as we left the bathroom.

"Yeah, of course." He replied. "How about you go get dressed and I'll go sort out some breakfast for us?" I grinned up at him.

"Thanks, Sam. I'm starving though and I'm not sure cereal is going to cut it just be itself." I thought for a moment. "If you pour us some cereal while I dress, I'll cook us up some bacon, eggs and pancakes too follow while you dress." I offered. His eyes lit up for a second before his face fell.

"That'd be perfect except I already burned all the food I had in the place." I snickered a little at his cooking disaster, then cut off my laugh before I hurt his feelings.

"Ok. Then you pour us some cereal, I'll dress, and then we'll head to the diner for a proper breakfast once we've taken the edge off our hunger with some cheerio's. How's that?" I asked and his grin came back full force.

"A woman after my own heart." He said and snatching a quick kiss, he gently pushed me in the direction of the bedroom to dress while he headed to the kitchen to pour us some cereal.

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**So. Can I come out from behind the furniture yet? What do we think?**

**Yes I know she said/thought the 'E word' in there without flinching, I'll reference it in the next chapter, but I couldn't do it in this one without breaking the flow.**

**Hope you enjoyed it. ;0p**


	29. Chapter 28: Reconciliations and Reunions

**Despite Hurricane force winds (how crap is it that we get hurricane conditions but can't refer to it as a hurricane just because it came from the Atlantic and not the Pacific?) damage to my roof, and a lack of power, I still heroically stride ever onwards with writing my story for you all, I hope the time it took to get my power and internet up and running again after storm St Jude is made up for by the absolute epic length chapter I've got for you. And also by the action-packed nature of that chapter. Hold on tight, guys; this one should be exciting :0)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 28: Reconciliations and Reunions

Sam went off to the kitchen, still dressed in just his towel, to pour us each a bowl of cereal and I went to get dressed in his room. As I passed by the full length mirror by his closet door, my reflection caught my eye and I stopped in my tracks, peering at my face to try and trace a sign of my new non-virgin status in my features, knowing of course that there was nothing there to see. I dropped my towel, wondering if the signs that weren't there on my face might be present on my body. I wasn't disappointed in my search. Although it wasn't the sort of thing I'd been looking for – I'd been thinking more along the lines of a more mature, filled out body shape – there were clear signs of my and Sam's recent activities all over my body. There were distinct, finger shaped bruises forming on my hips and thighs and I could feel a very sore spot on my lower back. Twisting in front of the mirror, trying to see exactly what it was that was causing the pain, I winced. The movement exacerbated whatever it was back there that was bothering me and I moved again a little more carefully. In the small of my back was the beginnings of a large ugly bruise and a single large but shallow scratch. My twisting had opened it back up and a few beads of blood had risen to the surface of my skin. Picking up the towel to dab at the scratch, I noticed a few drops of blood already on the white cotton and I turned slowly, watching my reflection to find where the blood might have come from. I could only see a few more bruises, no cuts or scratches, but then a little line of red on my inner thigh caught my attention. I quickly counted the dates in my mind, for a moment assuming that my period had started. _"Can't be." _I realised after a moment. _"My period's not due for another two weeks and I'm always as regular as clockwork." _In actual fact, I couldn't be completely sure on that; I had no real memory of how regular my cycle had been while I'd been deep in my pit playing the role of auto-pilot Bella, but with the exception of that time, I couldn't think of a single occurrence of my period ever being even a day early or late. I could set my calendar by it. _"I guess it was from my hymen breaking." _I thought, recalling the sharp pain I'd felt as Sam thrust in for the first time. _"I'm going to have to take care how I walk and sit down for a bit, I'm so sore." _ I dabbed at the blood on my inner thigh too before pulling my jeans. Not having any clean underwear, I just went without, tucking the previous day's panties into my pocket. My shirt, sadly, was in no shape to be put back on. There were a few spots of lasagne sauce from the night before on the front, and it was wrinkled almost beyond recognition.

"Sam. Do you mind if I borrow a shirt?" I called out of the door towards the kitchen. "Mine's in serious need of retirement." Sam's chuckle echoed back up the hallway to me.

"No problem." He answered. "I think there are a few old t-shirts from two or three years ago, before my growth spurt in the back of my closet. Help yourself." I opened his closet door and search through to find something that wouldn't make me look like a toddler dressing up in her father's clothes. Finally, right at the back I found a couple of very worn band t-shirts and an old hoodie. I threw on the Birds t-shirt which must've been older than me by a couple of years, relieved at the fact that the soft worn cotton wasn't annoying my scratched and bruises. It was only a couple of sizes too big for me and I was amazed at the massive growth spurt Sam must've had in only two or maybe three years. _"Jeeze. He must have shot up like a weed." _I thought. _"Like Jake and the others. Yep, the Quileutes definitely have a pretty decent gene pool!" _

Once I was dressed, I wandered out to the kitchen to get my cereal. Sam looked up from his seat as I walked in and froze for a second, staring at me. Before I could ask what he problem was, he'd looked back down at his bowl and was calmly eating his last few bites. He gestured to me to sit next to him at the massive but beat up old table where he'd set my bowl of cheerio's for me. I sat down and grabbed my spoon.

"This table is huge. Where did it come from?" I asked him before taking my first bite. "Oh it used to be over in the drop-in centre, but it was getting a bit the worse for wear and they decided to replace it, so I took it off their hands." He explained. "Most of my place was furnished that way – that's why none of it matches." He gave a wry chuckle and I looked around the table, noticing for the first time the variety of chairs dotted around it.

"I like it." I told him. "It's got character and it makes the place look more lived in." he snorted loudly and stood up, taking his bowl over to the sink and washing it out.

"It makes the place look more like a yard sale, is what it does, but it's all sturdy furniture, though old and worn, and I'm planning on slowly replacing each piece as I have the money until I have a whole house-full of matching sets." He looked around at me a he dried his hands on one corner of the towel he still wore around his hips. "It should only take seventy to eighty years." I couldn't help joining in as he laughed. "Well I'm going to quickly get changed so we can head out for a real breakfast as soon as you're done there." Sam said, walking towards the door. "That cereal barely put even a suggestion of a shadow of a dent in my hunger this morning." He gave me a dirty little grin. "Somehow I've managed to work up a real appetite even though it's still early." He said with a waggle of his eyebrows. I blushed, somewhat predictably, and he walked out to get dressed, chuckling under his breath as he went.

I always hated sitting up at the counter in diners; it made me feel as if I was on display for the entertainment of all the other customers. We had no choice on that morning though – the place was completely packed and so we took the only two remaining seats up at the counter and waited to be served. It might've just bee my imagination, but it seemed like everyone went a little quiet as we walked in, and then the buzz of conversation intensified as we sat down. I couldn't help feeling that Sam and I were the topic of conversation at most, if not all of the tables and booths in the place. The feeling only grew stronger still as we were finally approached by our waitress. It was just my luck that the waitress handling the counter customers just happened to be Leah. She walked past me as if I was invisible (although the faint sneer on her face hinted that even if she couldn't _see _me, she could certainly at least _smell _me, or something else that she found equally offensive) and stood in front of Sam, a flirtatious smile on her face.

"Well hello, you." She simpered at him. "Don't you look great? I haven't seen you in here for breakfast on a weekend in forever. I guess you just remembered I would be here and wanted to catch up a little, huh?" I rolled my eyes mentally, while keeping a pleasantly blank expression on the outside. It was clear se was trying to get a rise out of me, probably knowing that Sam didn't like dramatic scenes, but I had no intention of giving her the satisfaction. _"Seriously? That's the best you could come up with, bitch?" _I sneered inside my head. _"I've spent the last few months dealing with the likes of Lauren Mallory and her clones. I'm pretty sure I can deal with the Leah Clearwater amateur hour." _Sam on the other hand looked distinctly uncomfortable, It seemed he'd completely forgotten Leah worked in the diner on the weekends and I was betting that if I could read his mind he'd be cursing his forgetfulness and wishing he'd not burned his first attempt at breakfast that morning so we'd be safely back at his place right now, away from potential drama.

"Oh, erm….. Hi, Leah. Erm. Yeah, it's nice to see you and everything but we just came in for breakfast really, that's all." The smile on her face faltered for a split second, but almost before I noticed it slip, it was back in full force.

"Well what do you fancy this morning then, Sammy?" she asked in a weird breathy voice that really didn't suit her at all. "See anything you like?" she asked, and when Sam raised a surprised eyebrow she playfully flicked the menu card. "On the menu of course, silly" she simpered, and this time I barely managed to keep the eye rolling to myself. _"Jeeze. I'm a complete novice at this stuff, but even I could've done better than _that!" I thought, and, carefully keeping my action out of sight of the other customers behind us, and of Leah on the other side of the counter, I slowly reached over and gently squeezed Sam's knee, giving some moral support during what was clearly a very uncomfortable experience for him. He put his hand down and covered my own on his knee. He seemed to take a bit of comfort and confidence from my gesture as he squared his broad shoulders a little and sat up a bit straighter in his seat.

"_Bella and I_ would both like a cup of coffee to start us off, thanks Leah." He said carefully, clearly not wanting to hurt her, but also (I was pleased to see) not willing to allow her to dismiss me completely. "Then she'll have…" he trailed off, looking at me with a clear invitation to make my order.

"A stack of blueberry pancakes and a side of bacon, extra crispy please, Leah" I asked politely, deliberately ignoring her tense, clenched jaw as a she wrote down my order.

"And I'll take the same, only a double order of both for me, and an extra side of sausage, also double, thanks." Sam added in an equally polite voice. Leah looked like she was trying to gouge the pencil right through her pad as she wrote and I briefly wondered just how likely it would be that I at least got a spit-free meal. Unfortunately, as it turned out, pancakes a la slobber was the least of my worries. When she came back to pour our coffees, Leah "accidentally" slipped with my cup, and I wasn't able to move quick enough to escape a nasty scald on my hand. I leapt up with a painful yelp and cradled my hand to my chest protectively.

"Ow owowowowowow." I whimpered, blowing on my hand. Sam jumped up and grabbed a pitcher of chilled orange juice from the counter, then turned and gently but firmly took hold of my wrist, plunging my injured hand into the ice cold liquid.

"Shh. Shh. It's ok, you're ok." He soothed me, pulling me and my orange juice jug hand into an awkward embrace. "Keep your hand in there for a few minutes while I sort you something better." He made to pull away, but I whimpered again and grasped at the back of his shorts, not letting him move away from me. Somehow I felt better in his arms, although it also might've been down to the orange juice ice bath my hand was sitting in. I just wasn't willing just then to test the theory of which one was doing me the most good. He bent and pressed a kiss to the top of my head and turned, trembling in anger to a pale faced Leah.

"I don't believe for a second that you did that by accident, Leah, but we can deal with that in a few minutes. Right now you're going to get a pitcher of ice water for Bella to put her hand in, and you're going to do it so fast that I barely see you move. You understand me?" he growled at her and I saw her begin to tremble herself. I couldn't blame her; if _I'd_ had Sam's rage directed at me like that, I'd be trembling too. Despite her trembling, she still managed to look angry, and she opened her mouth to say something but she was distracted as, quick as a flash, one of the customers jumped up from her table with a pitcher of ice water and copied Sam's firm but gentle wrist grab and hand plunge manoeuvre, so I barely had time to register the air temperature on my scalded skin as I went from one liquid to the other. Still warm in Sam's comforting, strong arms, I looked around to see who it was that had stepped in to help. It was my new friend, the nice lady from the Rez grocery store that I often chatted with. She looked even more shaken than I felt, and I was just about to thank her when Sam's surprisingly shaky voice cut in before I could speak.

"Thanks Mom." He said and I whipped my head around and up to look him in the face so hard that I nearly gave myself whiplash. _"Mom?!" _I thought, stunned. _"_That's _his Mom? But he told me she hadn't spoken to him or even acknowledged his existence in about two years." _The shaken, hopeful look on his face confirmed both the fact that this w_as_ in fact his Mom, and that my memory of what he'd told me was accurate. He looked as amazed as I was at the identity of my extra helper. I turned back to her once again to thank her myself.

"Thank you so much, erm Mrs Uley" I said gratefully with a tight, pained smile. "It feels much less painful in the water." She nodded slightly.

"It's Alison, Sweetie, Mrs Uley is the battle axe of an ex-mother in law." She gave a wry little smile and I couldn't help but smile back. "Sam Honey, you get yours and Bella's breakfasts to go, and I'll take Bella outside for some fresh air and a bit of space away from gawking eyes." She said the last two words a little louder and with pointed emphasis and I suddenly realised that we were providing quite the floor show for the other customers who had all, without exception, stopped what they were doing and saying in order to stare and listen to what was happening with Sam, Leah, Alison and I. As usual my embarrassment showed all too clearly on my bright red face and I quickly cast my eyes down. _"Oh shit. Poor Sam. He really hates big dramatic scenes, and I've managed to land him right in the middle of an epic one, and in front of half the tribe too." _I fretted. _"And poor Alison too. Everyone watching her and Sam interact when they must know this is the first time she's as much as admitted his existence in all this time." _Whilst I couldn't condone her shunning of Sam, I could understand from the little Sam had told me that she'd been shattered by his break-up with Leah. Much more so than Sam or even Leah had been by the sound of things, and I knew from experience how hard it could be to deal with family disappointment. I didn't like the way she'd handled it, but I could understand the level of upset she'd been going through that led to her behaviour. Alison began to lead me outside, having to tug quite firmly on my arm to get me to release my hold on Sam. Just before we reached the door, she turned and fixed a still trembling, furious looking Leah with a piercing glare.

"As for you, _Leah Clearwater._" She ground out with an eerily calm, voice, made all the more terrifying by its softness, "I have loved you like a daughter, backed you whenever you needed it, stood up for you and what I believed to be your rights, even to the detriment of my own son and my relationship with him. And here, now, I am finally shown just _what_ I've been standing up for….. A vicious, spiteful, vindictive, spoilt little bitch, who would deliberately injure someone simply because they have what you want but can't have. I'm ashamed of you. I'm ashamed of myself for being so _stupid _as to destroy the wonderful close relationship with my only child over someone like _you. _It seems he _did _know better than me the whole time." Alison didn't give Leah a chance to respond, she simply raised her chin and turned back to the door, pulling me along with her, my chin dragging across the floor as I walked. Out of the corner of my eye, I noted that my expression was an almost exact match for Sam's as he stood staring at his Mom in disbelief. As the door closed behind us, I heard Sam launch into a growling rant of his own at Leah, and I was glad to be out of the way so that I didn't have to hear any of what was said. Right at that point, with my hand still shiny and red like a boiled lobster, and throbbing away in my portable ice water bath, I couldn't quite find it in myself to forgive Leah for what she'd done, but there was a tiny part of me at the back of my head that reminded me that when love is torn away, we all behave in different ways; Some of us turn the anger inward and sink into depression, and some of us turn it outwards and take it out on other people. I dragged my mind back to the woman who was kindly and carefully sitting me down on a bench outside the diner, overlooking the beach.

"Thank you, Mrs…. Erm, Alison. Not just for the ice water, but also for getting me out of there away from all the unwanted attention." She snorted in wry amusement.

"Bella Honey, I just did what any sensible person would've done. Well that is if the prospect of juicy gossip hadn't temporarily caused their brains to dribble out of the back of their heads anyway." She rolled her eyes at the customers still inside the diner who appeared to be listening and staring avidly at the continuing floor show inside as Sam spoke his mind to Leah. "It's the least I could do for Sam, especially after the way I've treated him for so long. He didn't deserve it from anyone, east of all his own mother, and if I can make up for it in the tiniest way by helping out his new woman in her time of need then I'm happy to have the opportunity." I was a little uncomfortable by her phrasing there. 'New Woman' seemed to me to hint at something a lot more serious and permanent than the arrangement Sam and I had. I tried to explain it without making either Sam or I look bad in her eyes, especially important as she'd only just begun to reconcile with her only son.

"Well I don't know if I could call myself his 'New Woman'." I hedged carefully, "We've only been out on one proper date and spent some time hanging out together at his place." I didn't think it would be at all appropriate to mention just how intense our 'hanging out' had been, or what exactly it had entailed – some things were just not meant for a mother's ears when it came to her son. She gave me a knowing look.

"Mmhmm." She said, eyeing my neck and collar bone, which had come into view as the collar of my borrowed shirt dropped down. "I'm guessing that's my son's handiwork right there on your neck. Looks like a bit more than 'hanging out' to me." My blush, which had been fading since we left the diner, came back full force. "Yep. I thought so." Alison crowed triumphantly, taking my blush for the confirmation it was. "And I may not have been spending any time with him lately, but I still know my boy; he's never been one to fool around if he wasn't serious, and I saw how he was looking at you when you weren't looking – I know serious when I see it." She stated confidently. "I'm glad to see it too. You're a good girl, a strong woman, and just what my Sam needs." I didn't have the heart to correct her, but I made a mental note to give Sam the heads up so that he could let her down gently. Just then, Sam came striding out of the diner, a couple of Styrofoam boxes and two plastic cups of orange juice balanced on top in one hand, and his cell phone in the other, his thumb furiously stabbing out a text message at lightning speed. He rushed right over to Alison and me and crouched down to look at my hand shaped lobster in its icy aquarium.

"Bella, are you ok? How's it feeling, Baby? Should I take you to the clinic?" Alison smirked at me in an obvious 'told you so' way at his endearment and I tried not to let the warm fuzzy feeling that flowed over me upon hearing it take me over. _"He didn't really mean to say it – it just popped out of his mouth cos he's distracted and worried. I mustn't let myself get carried away. We both know what this is, and I can't let myself start wishing and hoping for something more which would be no good for either of us, even if he _did_ want more, which he doesn't and even if _I_ did want more which I don't." _I told myself firmly and I reached out my good hand to cup Sam's cheek gently.

"Sam Honey, I'm ok." I told him quietly, realising that despite the firm talk I'd just given myself, like a nanosecond before, I'd just used a very 'relationshippy' endearment myself. "See? It's already less red and angry looking. Another little while in its fish-tank and my lobster hand will be good as new." Both Sam and Alison burst out laughing, their laughter weirdly similar considering their difference in size and looks. I guessed that Sam took after his dad in looks, but that laugh, and from what I could see, a lot of his personality were clearly hand-me-downs from Alison. His cell phone beeped just then, announcing a reply to his text I guessed. He glanced down at it and looked grim.

"Oh for fuck's sake. Why can't they handle it themselves? They know I'm busy." He grumbled under his breath. He looked up at me and his Mom with a guilty, pleading expression. "Bella, Mom, I'm really sorry, but Jared and Paul are insisting there's something only I can deal with, and they're not taking 'hell, fuck no' for an answer. I'm going to have to go handle it and I don't know how long it's going to take." Alison reached out almost gingerly and when he didn't flinch away from her touch she squeezed his shoulder with a bit more confidence.

"It's ok, Son." She said proudly, "I know you work hard with that contracting business of yours, and if there's some emergency on one of your site, then you should go deal with it." Sam looked almost guilty at this, which I couldn't understand, but mixed in there too was a fair amount of gratitude, relief and pride, which I could understand completely. "I'll take Bella back to my house and take a proper look at the lobster hand." They both snorted in synch with amusement. "And we can visit together until I have to head to work." She looked at me for confirmation and I felt I had to nod my agreement. "Oh, what happened with Leah by the way?" she asked as she and Sam both helped me, my lobster hand and the fish-tank/ice bath/water pitcher up to my feet.

"I gave her a piece of my mind over her behaviour, Mrs Redfern, today's duty manager did the same, and seeing as Leah was so angry at being yelled at, I told her she should go home and work off her tantrum. Mrs Redfern agreed, and Leah went storming out the back." He shrugged. Somehow I got a weird feeling that he was managing to tell the absolute truth whilst still managing not to tell us what really happened, but as my hand was beginning to really throb as it warmed up the water to the point of it being useless to cool the burning, I let it go for the time being, fully intending on picking it over in my mind the next time I was meditating. I pulled Sam closer to me with my good hand and raised up on my tip-toes to give him quick kiss. I felt too awkward in front of his mom to do more than that. Alison snorted and pointedly turned to stare at the sea, chuckling under her breath.

"I'll talk to you later?" I half told, half asked him.

"Sure sure." He said, obviously feeling uncomfortable himself. "Hopefully this won't take me _too _long to sort out, and I'll call when I get back." He gave me one last kiss and turned to his mom. Handing her the keys to his truck he said. "Here, Mom. I'll catch a ride with Jared. You drive Bella and I'll fetch the truck from yours later. We can have a proper talk then." He hesitated, a little unsure. "I mean, if that's ok with you?" Alison's eyes welled up.

"Of course it's ok, Honey. I'm so sorry. About everything. We'll sit down and talk when you're back." She sniffed a little and gave him a wobbly smile. "I love you, you know that, right, Sam?"

"I know, Mom." He replied, a tiny tremor in his voice. "I love you too." He wrapped her up in his huge arms and gave her a gentle squeeze. Setting her down he gave us both a little wave and strode off down the beach.

It took Alison a while to get herself together enough to drive, but once we set off, it only took a few minutes before we were at her place, a little two story house which looked old, but well maintained.

"It's a nice house." I told her as we walked to the door. "You've really looked after the place."

"Thanks, Sweetie, but it's not me that did all the work on it. Sam's been sneaking by whenever he knew I was at work and doing all the odd jobs that were needed." She offered me a watery smile. "He even chops wood for me whenever he thinks my supply's getting low." I returned her smile.

"He's a good guy. Always doing stuff for other people." I said and she nodded, gesturing for me to go on in ahead of her.

"He's always been that way, ever since he was tiny." I couldn't help but laugh and she looked at me quizzically.

"_Sam_ was once tiny?" I asked in mock disbelief and she laughed along with me.

"Believe it or not, yes he was." She told me, sitting me down at the kitchen table. "He just had this sudden growth spurt when he was coming up to eighteen. I remember it was about the same time as he got some fever. Worried the hell out of me – you could've fried an egg on his head. But he can't have been too sick, as he grew like a corn stalk plated in cow shit." I burst out laughing at her simile she really did have a refreshingly frank way of talking. "Now." She said, changing the subject completely. "Let's have a proper look at this hand of yours." She gently pulled the lobster from its tank and we both peered at it curiously. The skin was still fairly red and tight and shiny, but Sam had obviously reacted fast enough, putting it into the ice cold orange juice, that it hadn't blistered. It would be sore for a few days, but no serious damage had been done. We both sighed in relief.

"Looks like I got away without too much damage." I said, although it's getting pretty sore now it's out of the water again. I went to put it back it he water again, but Alison stopped me.

"You can't walk around with your hand permanently in there." She joked. "Give it a few minutes, I know its sore just in the normal room temperature, but you need to ease the hand back to normal or you'll damage it from the cold." She told me. I've got some good moisturising cream upstairs." She said, getting to her feet. "Now there's no heat left in the burn, we can smear some of that on and it might help the skin feel less tight and sore." She was right. The moisturiser did help and before long, the two of us chatting about inconsequential stuff the whole time, I was barely feeling more than a little throbbing from the hand formerly known as lobster, unless I knocked or brushed it against something, which I decided I would definitely avoid doing gain after the first time I caught it on the edge of the table and set the pain off once more as if the boiling coffee was right there, pouring over my skin once again. When Alison had to go to work, she dropped me back at Sam's place so I could collect my own truck and waved as she drove off.

I was very careful how I opened my truck door and climbed in, and I drove one handed as much as I could do safely. As I drove along the beach road, I glanced out at the waves and then slowly rolled to a stop. _"I wonder if I could make this throbbing go away while I meditate." _The thought just popped into my head all on its own. _"I normally end up almost completely unaware of my body once I get going, so I could at least give myself a little break from the soreness if nothing else." _I reasoned, and I turned down the track that led to Billy's house. _"I hope Jake's feeling better soon." _I mused as I climbed out of the truck. _"It's just my luck that he got sick just after we had that fight. We've not had the chance to get all of that shit sorted yet, and I'm missing my best friend." _

I walked down the beach to my little hollow and ducked under the hanging roots as I entered the relaxing quiet spot. Rather than my usual flop down onto the pile of fine dry sand, I lowered myself very carefully, not wanting to risk banging my hand again. Just the thought of it made my spine tingle, and not in a good way. Now that I understood just exactly what I was doing when I did my deep breathing, floating thing, I found it easier somehow to get myself to that state of complete relaxation, matching my breathing to the rhythm of the waves no longer took any concentration at all, it just happened sort of automatically and my mind seemed lighter somehow; easier to shake free of any conscious thought and allow to float free. The relief from the burning in my hand was almost immediate once I was deep into my meditation, and the tiny aware part of my mind was grateful for the reprieve. Although I hadn't started this session of meditation in order to pick through my thoughts as I often did, but to escape the pain in my scalded hand, my mind still emptied of conscious thought and the little snippets from the previous few days began queuing up for my attention. Knowing that trying to deliberately pull any of them to the forefront would just jog me out of my trance, I let them drift as they wanted and instead focused on my breathing.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

The first thought to make itself known was part of the dream scene I'd had while sleeping in Sam's bed. The middle aged man who'd collapsed in the forest. I knew there was something familiar about his mannerisms the first time I'd dreamed of him, so I allowed the memory of that first dream to fill my mind. I watched as he walked along and rubbed his left hand with his right. My mind skipped forward to show him doing the action again, and then skipped forward once more to show him rubbing at his left arm, and finally a last skip to see him grabbing at his chest before he collapsed to the ground. I knew I'd seen something similar somewhere and I let my mind float, allowing the memories to wash around me until at last the right one came forward. Harry Clearwater. I'd seen that same hand rubbing I'd noticed in the middle aged man in my dream with Harry. The awareness at the back of my mind froze for a second, nearly jarring me out of my trance. Harry was why I'd had the dream scene. Harry was in danger of having a heart attack, and judging from the feeling of urgency I'd gotten from Taha Aki, it wasn't likely to be far off in the future either. The _right _feeling wasn't at all welcome this time. The prospect of one of Charlie's closest friends being dangerously ill was a terrible one, and I knew I'd now have to add watching Harry closely whenever possible for signs of a heart attack to the list of things I was already responsible for. Adding the probability of more encounters with Leah if I was keeping tabs on Harry was also something I really didn't relish, but if it would give Harry a chance to survive, I'd just have to take my chances with his slightly disturbed daughter. That line of thought now settled, my mind allowed the memories to flit away again and I was free of thought once more.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

The next thought to come to the front was more disturbing than my realisation about Harry. Into my empty drifting mind flowed the images of torn up dead and dying wolves flying out of the nothingness to lie at my feet. The knowledge that this was a possible future for the Quileute Shape shifters was a horrifying thought and had I not been deep in my trance, it would've brought me to the edge of panic. As it was, my grasp on my trance trembled a little and I had to focus carefully to prevent the trance form shattering around me completely. I'd consciously made a selfish choice for the first time that I could remember when I decided to stall going out to find Victoria, and I couldn't escape the conclusion that I could no longer justify that decision. My justification for it had been shaky in the first place, if I was honest with myself, and now that I knew what might happen to the wolves if I made a poor decision in the future, I knew that I had to make my move sooner rather than later. The sooner I found Victoria and therefore hopefully the wolves too, the longer the shifters would have to make plans for whatever might be coming, hopefully enabling them to save themselves and, I also hoped, me. Another little memory of my dream the night before trickled through, spurring me on in my decision to make my move as soon as possible. I recalled the first thing Taha Aki had said to me before the dream scenes started; "The time approaches, the beginning of the new." He had told me, and I accepted in my trance state that he meant it was time for me to act. The _right _feeling washed through me once again, just as I'd expected it to, and the aware part of me at the back of my mind snorted in amusement. _"I know it's you doing that now, you know, so you could just say it rather than trying to be all mystical and shit." _My awareness told Taha Aki, and I wasn't at all surprised when I heard his amused voice answer inside my head.

"Ah. The young one accepts my presence at last." It was more than a little weird to be sharing head space with an old Quileute mystical being, but somehow I found it reassuring rather than disturbing, and I knew without being able to say _how _I knew that he wasn't there all the time, intruding on my mental privacy, but was only present when I reached this level of meditation, ready to confirm or refute my conclusions as I made them, just as he apparently had been doing all this time by giving me that feeling of _right_ every so often.

_"I'm pretty sure I've understood that you were there for a little while now." _I replied inside my head.

"Yes, Young One. I'm sure you have. But as I've told you before, understanding and accepting are different things. When you only _understood _there was still a barrier between us, making it hard to communicate, now you _accept _the barrier is lifted and now we can even talk together if needed when you're deep enough into your meditation." I had to admit that it would be useful to be able to communicate more easily with him, although it did raise the mind boggling issue of _who _or _what _he was, and also the issue of where did I stop and he begin. Those were issues for another time though, I had more than enough to be mulling over with the fact that I had to bite the bullet and head out into the forest to find the wolves, preferably before I also found the vengeful psycho vampire. Along the edges of my tiny bit of awareness I could feel the fear trying to creep its way in. I couldn't allow my meditation to end like that, a large part of the trace states was the wonderful peace and calm and balance I felt during and after, and dropping out of the meditative state while there was even a hint of _any _emotion, let alone fear, was a sure way to leave myself feeling unbalanced for the rest of the day at least. I focused once more on my breathing, willing my muscles to relax further, allowing the thoughts I'd been picking through to drift away once more, leaving me empty and sinking deeper and deeper into my meditation as I breathed.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

I sank deeper than I'd ever been before, my body not feeling anything and my mind a complete void, ready for any thought that might fly in, but not chasing any down. Once I'd allowed myself to soak up all the calm I could, and careful not to disturb the balance I'd found, I allowed myself to edge closer to awareness, inching back into myself bit by bit, still keeping my mind free as I did so. I was only a few moments away from coming back to myself when a little errant thought flitted into and out of my mind so fast that I almost missed it. It was a simple, tiny little thing and yet the implications of it were so profound to me personally that it jogged me the last step out of my trance. I opened my eyes and stared out through the hanging roots at the ocean, still consciously matching my breaths to the waves to help me maintain my calm peaceful balance in the face of this tiny yet huge revelation. _"I didn't even notice it at the time – I was far too caught up in the heat of things, but when I was comparing how rejected Sam would feel if I called things off with how rejected I'd always felt when it happened to me, I thought Edward's name, instead of referring to him as _Him. _And not only did it not cause me any pain, just like it didn't just then either, but I didn't even notice I'd done it."_

It was a massive step forward for me. A step towards fond memories and away from tortured regrets. A step towards healing and away from that howling, hungry pit. In my mind's eye I fitted another, much stronger door to the room where the pit could be found and set a large guard dog in front of the door. I was momentarily startled to see that the dog I'd posted as sentry looked a hell of a lot like the big black wolf from my dreams, but then I reasoned with myself that after having dreamed about the wolf for so long, every night, almost without pause, it was hardly a surprise if my imagination cast the image from my dreams in the role.

As I came back to full awareness, I was suddenly aware of something else. My hand. Whilst the break from the pain had been a real relief, suddenly being able to feel the scald without warning was almost as bad as the initial injury had been. I bit my lip to distract myself from the pain and slowly rose to my feet. I was still filled with the peace and clam from my meditating and I knew I needed to act right then, while I was in the best possible state to do so. Falling back on my tried and tested method for remaining calm when I had absolutely no reason to be so, I broke my mission down into simple, easy steps. _"Step one: Go home and leave that note for Charlie again." _Whilst I was hoping for the best, I wasn't going to take the chance of leaving my dad sad and alone without even a hint as to why, and so I drove, one handed, home to leave the note under his pillow like I had tried to on the Wednesday night. I figured I should get changed too. Just as I hadn't wanted to bring Charlie's scent with me if there was a chance I'd run into Victoria, I had no intention of bringing Sam's either so going out into the forest wearing his shirt and my own jeans which had been rubbed all over him the night before was a bad plan. I grabbed a pair of skinny jeans and a tank top and sweater from my closet and pulled them on, then went to get the note I'd written for Charlie the last time I'd decided to go on this mission. _"Ok, it's in the pocket of my black skinny jeans, and I haven't washed them yet." _I emptied my laundry basket out and all over the rug fell… nothing. The basket was empty. There should've been a week's worth of laundry in there and yet I appeared to have no dirty clothes at all.

"Oh fuck!" I muttered, running down to the washing machine. There inside was a load of dark clothes. I yanked the door open and pulled out a sodden tangled mess of clean but still wet clothes. It took me a few minutes to untangle my jeans from the mess one handed, but once I had I feverishly shoved my hands in each pocket, hoping my fingers to be met with a mushy paper mache ex-note to Charlie. Again nothing. I had a horrible churning feeling attempting to build in my stomach. On any other occasion I'd be thrilled that Charlie had learned not only to separate colours in the laundry, but also to check the pockets before he put the clothes in the machine. But right at that moment I was cursing the fact that he'd remembered to do any laundry at all, let alone remembered to look in the pockets. Angrily shoving the wet clothes ball back into the machine, I slammed the door shut and out of the corner of my eye saw something white drop to the floor from on top of the washer. I snatched it up, hoping against hope I'd dodged the bullet and sure enough it was my note. _"Thank fuck for that, it looks like he didn't read it!" _I let out a loud gushing sigh of relief and leaned against the machine for a moment, struggling to claw back my peaceful calm state. A few deep breaths later I was at least calm enough to head back upstairs to place the note under Charlie's pillow and once I'd done that I felt the peace dropping over me like a veil. It seemed that my acceptance of what needed to be done was helping me in my quest for calm and with each step down the stairs I felt fractionally calmer and more peaceful. By the time I reached my truck I was almost completely at ease, while still able to keep completely aware of my surroundings. I wondered if this was how soldiers felt the night before a battle, or death row inmates as they walked to the electric chair. The drive to the place where _He…._ where _Edward _and I had parked when we went to our meadow seemed much shorter than I remembered and it seemed like only a matter of minutes before I was walking alone through the forest, heading for the clearing. I was struck by the familiarity of walking alone through the forest. Not because of the time when Edward had left me there, but due to the repeated nightly 'Alone in the Forest' dreams I'd had for months afterwards. I did feel very exposed and lonely, and I quickly fought down the fear that was trying to rise at the memory of those dreams. I made no attempt to tread lightly and carefully; the point was to attract Victoria's attention if I could, then trust to the hope that the shape shifters would be patrolling and wouldn't let her pass through the forest so close to their land without chasing her off. I tripped a number of times over fallen logs, surface roots, broken branches, my own feet, and each time I scraped my good hand (I was still cradling my scalded hand to my chest most of the time, which of course was contributing to the slip 'n' fall festival' as it put me off balance to be using only one hand) I rubbed the traces of blood onto a tree trunk I walked past, wanting to make sure I was leaving a good strong scent trail for her to follow.

It was nearly dark by the time I finally reached the meadow and I had been prepared for a sudden burst of the old familiar echoing chest pain, ready to hold my chest as I struggled to keep the hole in my chest from swallowing me.

Nothing.

Or no. Not nothing.

Just a gentle, sad feeling, regrets for earlier times but no howling emptiness. No struggle for breath, not headlong decent into my pit. After walking right across the centre of the meadow, I sat on the very edge of the clearing, thinking over what I was feeling and what my lack of pain meant. _"I guess the lack of pain means that the damage done when _He.. _When _Edward_ ripped his soul away from mine has completely healed. And also that my heart has finally healed too." _I took a few minutes to deliberately run through some of the memories I had carefully avoided up til this point. Again, instead of the pain I felt a warm, slightly sad nostalgia ad regret. It seemed that finally, after months of struggling, mentally, physically and emotionally, and after all the trauma I'd put my dad through, I was over _H.. Edward._ I'd moved on.

I was about to turn to some more memories, sort of looking forward to allowing myself to think about the Cullens, when a twig snapping caught my ear and I was suddenly hyper alert, looking around at the rapidly darkening forest around me and trying to isolate the direction the noise had come from. _"Keep calm, keep calm, keep calm, keep calm" _I recited the mantra in my head and while my mind was obeying, every muscle in my body was thrumming, willing me to break and make a run for it, fully aware of the danger I was in. I sternly forced my body into lock-down, keeping my breaths measured and slow and trying to touch the very edge of my trance state so could keep my heart-rate as regular as possible. I didn't want to betray any sign to Victoria that I knew she was there, if indeed the noise had come from her.

It hadn't.

Suddenly and noiselessly a figure appeared on the edge of the meadow, exactly where I had broken through the tree line myself a while earlier. It wasn't Victoria. It wasn't even a female, but from the way he moved I could tell immediately that he _was_ a vampire. The grace and fluidity of his movement betrayed him to one in the know instantly. I raised my head slowly and calmly to try to make out through the gloom if it was someone I knew. He was too far away, but just as I thought that, he began to walk towards me, each step bringing him into clearer focus. I rose to my feet carefully, not making any sudden movements, and finally, when he was only a few yards away I recognised him.

"Laurent?" I asked, though it was unnecessary; his face wasn't one I was ever likely to forget.

"You remember me." He said delightedly, his tone reminding me strangely of a kindergarten teacher, pleased and proud when one of her pupils made her a macaroni necklace. I rolled my eyes internally at his patronising attitude and wondered if he was friend or foe; on the one hand, he'd left Victoria and James before James started hunting me in order to go and join the Cullens' cousins and try the 'vegetarian' lifestyle. On the other hand, he _had _been close with Victoria, probably for a large number of years, and him turning up like this when Victoria had been in the area killing random people in her mission to get to me seemed to stretch co-incidence a mite too far.

"Of course." I said. "How are you? I'm surprised to see you here." He looked around cautiously, raising his chin and breathing deeply through his nose. I guessed he was scenting to see if any of the Cullens were around. As his eyes caught the moonlight my wondering about whether he was friend or foe was answered.

Red.

Blood red eyes. I was definitely in danger and it might end up being danger I couldn't get out of because as far as I knew the wolves wouldn't be out looking for _this _vampire and I didn't know just how good their noses were when it came to an unfamiliar scent. Would they even know there was another vampire in the area before it was far too late for me? Remembering the dream scene I'd had where Taha Aki showed me over and over a meeting between me and an unknown male vampire, I tried to keep my hopes up – surely this was what that dream had been about and so as long as I came across as confident and didn't show any fear, I'd hopefully be able to keep him talking long enough for the wolves to appear. Drawing all the calm I had around me I kept my face carefully blank, not letting the fact that I'd seen his eyes show.

"I'm well, Bella, thank you." Laurent replied with an almost formal politeness, taking another couple of steps forward. "I'm surprised to see you too. I went to the Cullens' house but couldn't find any trace of them there, they've clearly been gone for quite some time. I would've thought they'd taken you with them, weren't you Edward's little pet?" He seemed genuinely unaware of just how offensive he was being, his voice remaining completely friendly, although having spent so long around vampires myself I could recognise the signs of one of them sizing up the distance between us before pouncing. I had to step things up before he made his move and attacked. _"Confidence is the key." _I reminded myself and forced a natural sounding laugh from my lips.

"Well that's not how I thought of it, but I guess from a vampire's perspective, that might be how it looked." I said with as convincing a chuckle as I could manage. "What was it you needed the Cullens for? I could pass on a message for you if you want. I talk to them most days on the phone and I'm seeing a few of them next weekend in Port Angeles." I was lying my ass off, but trying to think of it as making a bluff in a poker game; he'd bet, I'd called and raised and I couldn't let anything about me show that I had the worst hand imaginable. I must've succeeded with my tactic as he faltered a little. Obviously I didn't seem quite such a tasty treat if there was a chance the Cullens would find out just who had killed me _"what a fucking coward." _I thought.

"Oh it wasn't anything in particular, I was just passing through the area and wanted to have a little visit with them, that's all." He took another step forward. "So you talk to them a lot then? I hope they're all doing well. What prompted them to move away and leave you behind, Bella?" He tilted his head slightly at me as I answered.

"Oh you know, the usual." I answered with what I hoped sounded like a breezy tone. "People were beginning to take note of the ever youthful Dr Cullen, and whenever that happens, they make a move as soon as they can without raising suspicion." He gave a toothy grin at my answer and the sight of all those strong white teeth made my body break rank for a split second. My knees trembled ever so slightly and my heart sped for a couple of beats before I was able to regain my control, but it was too late. I realised as his grin widened even further that he'd tilted his head to listen more closely to my heart-rate. He'd spotted my lie and his body language shifted, his movements becoming more graceful, more liquid, like a lion stalking a gazelle. I forced myself to keep still, my dreams had shown me what showing fear would get me and I had to trust that Taha Aki knew his stuff.

"Yes I can see how that would be a problem with their lifestyle." Laurent answered, edging closer still

"I thought you were living with the Denali's now?" I ventured. "How are you finding the diet? Is it a hard change to make?" He grinned again, tilting his head deliberately into the moonlight to show me his eyes which he'd assumed I'd not yet noticed.

"Ah well as you can see, the new lifestyle hasn't really taken for me." He said with a careless shrug. "I take a little 'business trip' now and then and I'm afraid that when I'm on these trips I cheat a little on my diet." He gave a little chuckle and took another step. He was now only about five paces from me. "On this latest trip I ran into an old friend, a mutual acquaintance." He went on. "Victoria. She's really not very happy with you, Bella. She asked me to swing by and see if you were still protected, and I think we both know the answer to that, don't we?" I forced myself not to react. "She's going to be quite angry with me I think. She wanted to kill you herself; she's become quite boring with her petty vengeance, but you really do smell quite delicious and I really am quite thirsty." He licked his lips and began to tense his body, I knew I had only a few seconds left before he pounced but I also knew I still couldn't show him any fear. I forced myself to hold my ground, keeping my body language confident and assured and I made one last desperate attempt to stall him long enough for the arrival of the wolves as Taha Aki had shown me in my dream.

"Well I guess I can understand that." I said calmly, eliciting a surprised eyebrow raise form the vampire. "But I'm afraid there's something you haven't taken into account. Something that Victoria failed to inform you of." He stood a fraction straighter, obviously surprised and curious.

"And what could that be, my dear? You're not going to try to convince me that one of the Cullens is around again are you? We both know that's a lie, and something as obvious as that isn't going to protect you." _Finally, _over Laurent's shoulder I spotted a bit of movement in the edge of the treeline. _"I hope to hell that that's the wolves or I've had it!" _I thought, and then I made out a flash of light grey fur in the moonlight. _"Thank fuck for that!"_ I smiled, a big, beaming smile at Laurent, no trace of anxiousness in it whatsoever.

"No Laurent, I wouldn't insult either of us by trying that lie again. But you know you really should've asked Victoria why she couldn't look in on me herself. It probably would've saved your life." He looked shocked and a tiny thread of doubt edged into his expression. Behind him, the wolves were edging silently across the clearing, their paws not making a sound in the damp grass of the meadow. They were only a few yards behind him and still stalking closer as I continued "See she's been _trying _to get to me for months, but they've chased her off again and again. She's managed to evade them so far, but I'm sure they'll get her eventually." I leaned forward in a confiding way and managed not to shudder back away from him as he automatically leant forward too, to hear what I was going to say. "Of course," I said in a stage whisper, "I don't think she was ever stupid enough to let them get _this _close before making her escape. She may have managed to keep out of their grasp but I'm afraid that you, Laurent…." I gestured over his shoulder. "Are _fucked" _

His head spun around faster than my eyes could track to see what I was gesturing at and his entire body froze for a second.

"No. I don't believe it." He whispered under his breath.

"You _should_ believe it." I told him, not able to keep the smug little smirk off my face. "Like I said, Laurent." My voice firmed with my final words and I virtually spat them out. "You. Are. Fucked."

Quicker than my senses could follow, Laurent made a break for it, running past me so close that his clothes brushed against me as he ran. A split second later the wolves followed and as they ran past me I was finally able to note their appearance. It seemed that my dreams had been very accurate indeed. At the front of the pack a huge black wolf was flanked by a similar sized russet animal and a very slightly smaller silvery grey, just like some of the wolves I'd seen in my dreams. As they tore across the clearing after the fleeing vampire, they blurred out of sight, my eyes weren't able to track them at the speed they were moving, but I _was _able to note the streaks of brown, another, darker grey, and a pair of much smaller streaks one a sandy colour and another which also looked grey in the moonlight, which came at Laurent from three directions just as he hit the tree line. He never stood the smallest chance. Trapped between the pack, he barely had a second to come to a halt when he was hit by three of the seven wolves; the black, the russet and the darker grey, which I could now tell had a few black spots, and the three shifters dragged him out of my sight and into the tree-line. Seconds later I could hear the all too familiar metallic screeching which I knew heralded the destruction of a vampire and I resisted the urge to cover my ears and cower on the ground. One of the smaller wolves, the grey one, and the larger, silvery grey wolf looked over to where I was standing and I got the distinct impression they were not at all happy to see me, a feeling that was quickly confirmed by the larger wolf's upper lip raising in a wolfy sneer and the smaller wolf raising it's hackles and outright _growling_ at me. The large Brown wolf snarled at the pair and the smaller grey pinned itself to the ground in response, looking every inch the submissive pack member, while the larger grey continued to sneer, but turned it's head away after a moment in disdain. The action looked bizarrely familiar for a second, but before I could analyse that thought, the three that had dragged Laurent off returned. The pack grouped together at their side of the meadow and stood there in silence, communicating in some way I couldn't' fathom. I was suddenly more afraid than I'd been the whole time I'd been out in the forest _"Oh shit. Are they getting ready to leave? I haven't told them I need their help yet. They _can't _go until I spoken with them." _I raised my voice and called over to them and their heads turned to look at me almost as one.

"Thank you. Thank you so much. I really can't tell you how grateful I am for your help. I don't know how much you can understand when you're in that form," That elicited several flinches and one surprised yelp from the small sandy coloured wolf, "but I really do need to talk to you. Please, if you can understand me, _please _can I talk to you? There are things you need to know." The pack turned back to stand and stare amongst themselves again, an occasional growl and snarl punctuating their meeting this time. At one point the black wolf towered over the two greys that had appeared a bit hostile and the two of them dropped to their bellies, the smaller one looking like it was about to roll onto it's back in the ultimate canine sign of submission as the huge black wolf snarled and growled at the two of them, it's hackle raising, making it look even bigger still. I still had no way of telling if they'd understood my plea, and when all but the three who had taken Laurent down turned to melt back into the trees without a further sound, I felt my stomach begin to sink to my knees, until I saw that the other three were heading slowly towards me, clearly trying not to spook me by moving too fast. Wanting them to see that I was far from being afraid of them, I sat myself down cross-legged on the ground (_"Indian fashion, how ironic." _I couldn't help but note with internal amusement) something that no-one who was nervous of the colossal wolves would do, and both the russet ad dark grey wolves gave a little snort which I could only interpret as amusement at my action. The black rolled his eyes at the other two, and they began to move towards me a little quicker; their bodies looking more relaxed and natural. When they were about five yards away, the three of them sat too, looking at me expectantly.

"I'm guessing that means you _can _understand us regular humans when you're in wolf form then?" I asked, and as I mentioned their form for the second time, all three of them gave a start of what I assumed was surprise. After a moment, the black wolf lowered and raised his head in an approximation of a human nod and I felt myself relax fully for the first time since I left my hollow on the beach. "Well thank fuck for that, or this would be a really awkward conversation to try." I muttered as quietly as I could under my breath. This time all three of them snorted with that amused sounding noise and it was my turn to give a start of surprise. "Crap. You guys can _hear _that?" I asked, and all three of them gave their wolfy nods. "Note to self then. No more muttering under my breath." I muttered under my breath, causing a series of choking barking noises from the three in front of me which I guessed must be wolfy laughter. Despite the redness on my face, I joined in the laughter. After a moment I settled back down and made a start on my explanation.

"There's a female vampire, a red-head who's been taking out campers and hikers around here for a few months now." I began, and the three of them stilled and zeroed their attention on m. It was a little unnerving, but I'd already dealt with much worse that day, so I pressed on regardless. "I know what she's after." I told them, and the three of them shuffled closer, giving me the image of a group of kids being told a particularly exciting story, and edging closer as the action picked up. Stifling my inappropriate amusement at the errant thought, I continued with my explanation.

"She's after me."


	30. Chapter 29: Revelations & Revelations

**I want to take a quick moment to that everyone who has left such kind review for this story. I really does make my day to read any feedback on my writing, but the wonderful review I've been getting?... Well let's just say that I might have to get the door widened around here so I can get my head through. Lol This evening also saw me hit 200 followers and 100 favourites, so thank you to all of you for your support while I write this (let's face it, epic length) story, and here, in gratitude for your kind words, is another extra-long chapter. Enjoy. :0)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 29: Revelations and more Revelations 

Everything froze for a few seconds.

All three wolves became giant hairy statues, not even breathing and I wondered for a split second if they'd heard another threat approaching and were preparing to leap into action. It turned out I was partially correct; they were about to spring into action, but not against another threat. The huge black wolf began a low grumbling growl, his hackles rising, making him look even larger than ever and then the russet wolf joined in with his own low growl. The sound was so deep and loud that I could feel it inside my lungs, making it difficult to catch my breath. Then I did catch my breath. In a loud gasp as the black wolf exploded into movement. It spun around on his back legs, snarling and biting at the air, seeming to be looking for something to rip apart. Had he been in human form I would have said that the growls and snarls that were coming from his snapping jaws were a string of curses, but as he was in wolf form I couldn't be sure just exactly _what _was going on. The russet wolf too was snarling and growling at nothing, which then became snarling and growling at the black wolf, who snarled back, and the two of them were soon taking swipes at each other with their front paws. The situation was fast deteriorating into a brawl, it seemed only a matter of time before they started biting chunks out of each other, and I had no idea what had started them off or what I could do to stop it. The dark grey wolf moved, placing his body between mine and the two scrapping wolves and I was grateful for the barrier. For the first time I was afraid of the shifters. I had always thought of them only as protectors of the tribe, never really taking into account the animalistic side of their nature. Were they always this volatile? I jumped to my feet, ready to make a run for it if it looked like the fight was going to make it past the furry grey barrier. The dark grey wolf let out a single loud choking bark, trailing off into a menacing growl of his own and I began to worry that he too would join in the fight, but instead his bark and growl had the opposite effect. The black and russet wolves broke off and stood apart panting with exertion.

"What the fuck was _that _about?" I murmured to myself, a slight tremor in my voice. The wolves of course heard me and their heads all snapped round to face me once again. Moving very slowly, clearly aware that the fight had scared me, the black wolf walked closer to me and when he was about three feet away, sank down to lie on his belly, his head now just a little lower than mine. Taking that as an attempt to calm me and to reassure me that he was no threat, I relaxed a little and slowly lowered myself back down into my previous seated position. Letting out a huge gusty sigh, the other two wolves also settled down to the ground and we looked at one another, them waiting for me to speak again, and me not knowing where to begin, and worried that whatever I said might spark off another round of hostilities.

"Well this is awkward." I said with a shaky laugh, and the black wolf let out an amused snort while the russet and grey wolves dropped their jaws, their tongues lolling to one side in unmistakable wolfy grins. I looked down at my scalded hand in my lap, suddenly fascinated by the way the tightened, swollen skin picked up the moonlight. "I don't suppose you guys could change into your human forms for this? It would certainly be much easier to talk if the conversation was going two ways." I asked "I mean I know you're not linked to the Luna cycle like true werewolves, so I'm sure you _can _go back and forth between forms, but obviously I don't know the way it actually works, if there has to be a danger to make you shift from human to wolf, or if there's a timing issue, like you can only turn back once it's light or something, and then on top of that there might be some tribal law or something that you'd be breaking if you shifted in front to of me and will you listen to me ramble? It's like I've got no filter or control system at all so I'm going to just stop my mouth moving now." I finally managed to bring my verbal diarrhoea to a halt and looked up from my hands to see all three wolves frozen in what could only be described as shock. The three of them were all sporting the same expression – wide eyed, slacked jawed surprise. It was amusing to see such a human expression on a wolf's face, but I reeled in my desire to giggle, realizing I'd not actually given them either a gap in my talking to respond, or even a question they could respond to. I took a deep breath and asked. "So can you shift back for this chat?" In unison, the three of them shook their heads. "Ok. Well that's going to make this whole thing a little trickier, but I'll try to stick to yes or no questions and if I say something that you need more explanation on, just give me a sign and I'll try to make it clearer. That work for you?" This time just the black wolf nodded. "Alright then. So where to start." I mused. "I figure you know who I am?" again a nod from all three of them and I wondered if I knew who they were too, but I was fairly sure that asking them that question would simply get me three blank stares and I could live without knowing, as long as I could ensure some protection for Charlie, and probably for Sam now too as I'd selfishly dragged him into my life. I'd made a point of trying to keep time spent with him isolated to on the Rez, but I was kidding myself and I knew it. After all, she'd left that note on my bike on the Rez, on the outskirts, sure, but still on the Rez itself. No Sam needed to be watched carefully too. I wasn't going to let anything happen to him because of me. Shaking off these thoughts I went back to my one sided conversation. "Right. Well if you know who I am, then you'll know who my dad is too?" again I got more nods. "The red-head is after me, but she's threatening Charlie too, she basically told me that if I don't give myself up to her then she'll get me anyway, but she'll kill him first. The loud growl coming from the black wolf made me lean as far back as I could in alarm, worried he was about to go back into a snarling, growling fit. At my movement he swallowed back the growls with an obvious effort and gave me a strangely apologetic look. I nodded, slowly sitting forward again. The grey wolf gave a little whine, tilting his head to one side in a questioning way.

"You need me to explain something?" I asked and he nodded. I ran back through what I'd said, looking for something that might need clarifying and the only thing I could think of was he wanted to know _how _I'd spoken with Victoria. I checked to see if I was right.

"You want to know how she spoke to me, is that it?" I asked and he nodded quickly. _"Hey I'm pretty good at this Dr Dolittle shit." _I thought to myself with a mental snort, then focused once more on the conversation. "I was out on my motorcycle and had a little accident so after a little concussion, a lot of self-humiliation due to said concussion," at this there were a pair of amused snorts, but I couldn't make out which wolves they had come from, "and a short stay at the Rez clinic, I went to collect my bike, only to find a letter addressed to me from the vampire. Her name is Victoria by the way. I'm sure you don't really care, but just in case you do….." all three of them were emitting a low growl, but I refused to let myself react in fear again. If they kept this up and I kept cowering away every time, the conversation would drag on forever. I gave them a stern look and the growling petered out, the grey and russet wolves looking amused again.

"So anyway, that's how I know what she's planning. And the vampire you just kept from turning me into a human sippy cup was Laurent, an old friend of hers." Three snorts of amusement met my flip expression and I gave a little wry grin before continuing. "She asked him to come see if the Cullens were still around and didn't warn him about you guys, so as she obviously knows the Cullens aren't here anymore, I'm guessing that she really wanted to see if another Vampire would be able to get past you and get to me. You should probably be ready for her to try that again; if she can't _find _another friend to make the next attempt, she'll probably _make _one." We sat in silence for a moment, digesting that thought. I hadn't actually given it conscious thought, the facts had just tripped off my tongue, but it sounded more than plausible to me. That _right _feeling floated over me and I couldn't help the sarcastic tone in my mind _"Gee thanks, Taha Aki. You can confirm stuff I already know, but you couldn't give me a few extra details on how the shifting thing works so I didn't have that little rambling rant a few minutes ago?" _

"Back to my story then." I continued, marshalling my thoughts. "I'm sure you're aware of who I was dating before they all left, but what you're probably not aware of was what happened about a year ago. I went to watch the Cullens playing baseball one evening and we were interrupted by three nomad vampires, human drinkers." I shuddered a little at the memory. "They were Laurent, Victoria, and Victoria's mate, James. James was a really sick fuck, he was obsessed with the hunt, and the greater the challenge, the more he enjoyed it, he was into making his _prey _suffer too, so when he got a whiff of me in the baseball clearing, his hunting instincts were put on high alert – hunting a human who was protected by a whole family of vampires, what could be a greater challenge than that?" I could understand the constant background sound of growling coming from all three wolves this time, so I said nothing and continued on as if I hadn't noticed. "Edward got me out of there, but James had already begun the hunt and I was worried Charlie wold get caught in the crossfire, so I picked a fight with him while I knew James was listening, and Alice, Jasper and I drove off to Phoenix while the rest of the family tried to lead James off on a wild goose chase elsewhere and kill him. He took the bait for a while, but then worked out the ruse and came for me. He managed to convince me that he had my mom hostage and would kill her unless I gave myself up to him. So of course I went. Turned out it was a trick and he nearly killed me, but Edward and the other Cullens got there in time and killed him instead. Now Victoria's on a mad bid for revenge and she's not going to stop until she gets what she wants; me dead. And probably in as painful a way as she can manage." I came to a halt in my story, breathing fast as I tried to get control over my fear once again. It was strangely cathartic to be able to finally tell someone all about it, but still I kept a few things back, for some reason not wanting to share with the shape-shifters the details of how James had bitten me and how Edward had prevented me from turning. The wolves were staring silently at each other, I came to the conclusion that they must be able to communicate telepathically. It made sense – there was no point in having a whole pack to protect the tribe unless the pack could work together, and how else would they be able to communicate to work as a united pack unless they could hear each other in their heads? While the wolves had their mental chat, I focused on my breathing again, slowly and carefully placing myself just on the edge of my trance state, still aware of my surroundings and what was happening, but as close to the calm and peace I needed to get through my mission. I felt my heart-rate reduce and settle into a regular, steady pattern, slightly slower than normal, helping the calm spread through my body. It seemed to help a little with the pain in my burnt hand too, which was a welcome bonus. The black wolf looked up suddenly as my heart rate shifted, tilting his head to listen and regarding me with a kind of thoughtful expression. I nodded calmly at him and continued talking now that the wolves had apparently finished their silent side-bar.

"Vampires mate for… well I was going to say life, but I guess eternity would be the better word to use. Killing one mate creates a rabid, vengeance obsessed monster in the form of the other mate, and to be honest, I'm not sure that Victoria was entirely sane even when James was alive, so you guys should be aware of the fact that she will do anything, _anything_ to get to me, and she won't care if she dies in the process, as long as I die too." I took a deep breath pulling the calm around me a little tighter as I prepared to make my final statement. It was something I'd long ago accepted, but I'd never said it out loud and I knew that doing so would make it a lot more real. My voice when I spoke remained calm and quiet and I was secretly impressed with myself for sounding so matter-of-fact when what I was saying was so deadly serious and important.

"I accepted a while ago that she'd probably kill me. I don't want to die. But if it wouldn't destroy my dad to lose me, then I'd hand myself over with a smile on my face and a song in my heart to keep him safe. As it is, it might come to that anyway, my life for his and if that's the price I'll pay it, but I've put him through so much already, if it can be avoided, I don't want him to have to suffer through losing me too, especially as I'm pretty sure that after Victoria's through with me, there's no way anyone should be allowed to find my body. I came out here today hoping to lure Victoria out and hoping even more that you wolves would track her in time to keep her from killing me, although if you'd only got here in time to kill her after she killed me, that would've been enough to keep Charlie safe so I wouldn't have blamed you for not saving me." Again the growling started up and there was no mistaking the fact that they didn't like the idea of me being killed it was nice to know that they cared, despite not knowing me all that well.

"So here's the thing then. Will you please keep Charlie safe? Will you keep the vindictive bitch away from him?" They all nodded solemnly and I let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you. I know that you're there to protect your tribe, but I was hoping you'd be able to help him too. I know it's selfish of me to ask. I don't want you to risk your own lives, or to neglect other duties in the process, but for Charlie's sake I have to at least put it out there; will you keep Victoria away from me too?" I looked down at my sore hand again, not wanting to see if they shook their heads, no, and feeling terrible for even asking them to put themselves at risk for my sake. "I know I have no right to ask, I know that I'm the one that brought this on myself, that by associating with your natural enemy I probably negated any right I might've had to ask, and if it wasn't for Charlie, I wouldn't be asking, but for Charlie's sake I _will _ask. Please. Can you keep me alive?" I finally dragged my eyes up from my hand to see three wolves nodding their heads repeatedly and enthusiastically. I was momentarily reminded of tacky little nodding dog toys I'd seen now and again in the rear windows of cars and struggled to keep the giggle inside. I only had one more thing to ask them and it was the easiest of them all as Sam was a member of their tribe and therefore within their remit for protection anyway, but they needed to know that he was a possible target so that he could be safe.

"There's one more thing too." I added. "I've been very selfish and I've managed to drag someone else into my shit storm. He's a good man and doesn't deserve to get hurt because of me." I shrugged my shoulders. "I've done what I can to make sure he's not hurt emotionally if something happens to me – for as long as I've known Victoria was after me I've known I can't afford to let anyone else get too close to me; it would be bad enough to have my dad destroyed by my death without adding more people in, so I made it clear I wasn't looking for anything long-term or serious, not that he's interested in that with me anyway, so we're all ok there, but even though I've only really spent time with him on the Rez, where it would be harder for Victoria to pick up on any connection between us, I'm still worried that he'll end up as collateral damage so I wanted to make sure that you'd keep him safe just like Charlie." I got it all out in a rush, ashamed to admit that in my selfishness I'd put someone else at risk. "It's Sam Uley, the guy I'm seeing, so he comes under your protection anyway, he's not just part of your tribe, but the new chief, isn't he? But it's better if you know that he might be a target thanks to me." The russet and grey wolves were back to doing their tongue lolling wolfy grins and the black wolf looked a little confused, but all three nodded when I raised a brow, hinting that I needed an answer. I let out a relieved sigh and leaned back with my hands behind me, signalling that I was finished. The second my injured hand touched the ground I snatched it back and put it in my lap, leaning back on just my good hand this time. In an all human situation, this might've been a question and answer period, but I couldn't see how that would work seeing as they couldn't exactly as me anything. They went back to another silent conversation between themselves, and I thought over what to do next. With their duty to protect the tribe probably uppermost in their list of priorities, I figured that I should continue to spend as much time as possible on the Rez, and encourage Charlie to do the same. There was no point making the pack split up and cover more territory than they needed to. There was strength in numbers. _"I should probably suggest that; they can't ask me for themselves. Oh and I'll bet they're wondering just how I knew about them in the first place. It's not exactly something they've advertised in town." _I thought and I waited until the three of them had finished their little debate before I spoke again

The black wolf turned to me and huffed with what I interpreted as frustration.

"Pissed because you can't ask me the questions you need to?" I asked with a little smirk, and he snorted and nodded. "Well I thought of a couple of things you might've wanted to ask, and if there's anything else, I'll just have to start making guesses until I hit on the right question." I told him, sitting back upright again. "I guessed you'd want to know how I knew about you shape-shifters?" I asked and they grew very still all of a sudden, the tension pouring off them before the black wolf nodded slowly. "Well I'd heard Carlisle Cullen talk about an extinct clan of wolf shape-shifters in the Quileute tribe, which was my starting out point. A friend of mine told me a few of your old stories, not believing them to be anything more than spooky stories to scare the kids with, and certainly not realising that he'd basically just outed the Cullens as vampires, bearing in mind my weird ability to notice and connect little details. After the Cullens left I spent a lot of time wishing there were still wolves around so that I could ask for help with the Victoria stuff, and then after the bear sightings started, and then I got the letter from Victoria, telling me that hiding behind the guard dogs wouldn't protect me, they all growled again at that, but I ignored it and continued, I connected the dots and realised that the extinct clan of wolf shape-shifters weren't so extinct after all. That's when I came up with my plan to find you and ask for help." I said. I gave a little shrug and blushed. "I _was _going to come on Wednesday, but _something _tempted me to risk at least one more day," I smiled a little remembering how hot Sam had looked leaning against his truck in that tight ass shirt and tight ass jeans and his tight ass ass. "and then I was weak and managed to justify another day after that, and then another, but then I had a dream that freaked me out and reminded me just how selfish I was being, and how many people might be put at risk if I kept stalling, so I bit the bullet and got it over with. So anyway that's pretty much how I know." I finished, avoiding completely any mention of my meditation or Taha Aki. I had no idea how that news might go down and things were going fairly well; no need to complicate matters.

"I'm also guessing you wanted to ask me to stay on the Rez as much as I can, and to encourage Charlie to do the same thing so you guys don't have to spread yourselves too thin. Was that one of the things you needed to say?" The black wolf nodded again. "Ok, I can do that and so can Charlie, although I'll have to find some way to encourage him to do it without telling him about you guys I'm guessing." For some reason that brought on a round ok the choking barks I'd concluded were wolf laughs, I couldn't see why keeping Charlie in the dark was funny. "_Probably just some weird in joke between the wolves. I'll let it slide." _I decided.

"So was there anything else?" I asked, then I froze. "Oh fuck, do you want me to stop seeing Sam so he can be safer?" I asked in a slightly panicked voice, my eyes beginning to prickle with unshed and entirely unexpected tears. "I mean if it's best for his safety then of course I'd do it, but otherwise, I'd really like to keep seeing him as long as I can. I've already got the emotional worries covered, even if I _was _the sort of girl he could be interested in long-term, which I'm not, we've both agreed that we're not to let things get too serious, so if I have to stop seeing him because of Victoria, or if she does manage to get me, I've kept him far enough away emotionally speaking that he'd not be too hurt." I realised I was gabbling again, and was really relieved by the emphatic head shaking the black wolf was doing. He was telling me in no uncertain terms that I wouldn't have to stop seeing Sam yet. Behind him, the other two wolves were wolf laughing away like I'd said something hilarious, but rather than letting it bother me I wrote it off as a stupid in joke again. I couldn't believe that after all I'd been through that day, it wasn't until this point that I'd nearly lost my hold on myself, but I'd actually been taken aback by how much it would upset me to have to give up Sam so soon. _"Shit I really need to watch that. I _can't _let myself fall for him, I just _can't" I reminded myself again, and I took a few deep breaths focusing on them once again to bring myself back to that point on the edge of my trance where I could feel calm but alert. My heart-rate instantly slowed once more and again the black wolf cocked his head and narrowed his eyes, listening to the change in my heart beat and probably wondering how I did it. I met his eyes and just shrugged. I had no intention of explaining it. He had his secrets and I was entitled to mine as they had no bearing on him or anyone's safety.

"So unless there's anything else, I need to head home. I left a note for Charlie giving a very, _very _vague explanation of why I'd gone just in case things went badly, and I want to get back before he does so that he never gets a chance to read it." The black wolf look like he had things he wished he could say, but as he either couldn't or wouldn't shift back into his human form, I guessed it was just too bad. I was beginning to get edgy about beating Charlie back, who knew when he was likely to finish up with Billy and Harry.

I stood and dusted off my damp clothes, looking about in the dark to try to work out which direction I'd come from. It was a hopeless endeavour. With everything that had happened in the meadow I'd gotten completely turned around. I turned back to the wolves.

"I don't suppose that your wolf bodies come equipped with night vision do they?" I asked. "I could use a point in the right direction." The three grinning wolves looked at me for a moment and then exchanged glances with each other. After a brief pause, the russet and grey wolves gave me a quick nod and melted into the forest behind us, leaving me alone with the black wolf. He jerked his head over to his left, inviting me to follow and we slowly walked across the meadow together.

"So I'm gonna guess that you're in charge of the pack?" I asked and he turned his head to look at me, tilting his head quizzically. "Well you're a lot bigger than any of the others, except for that russet coloured guy, you're only a couple of inches bigger than him." I explained. "Also it's the way you hold yourself around them and the way they hold themselves around you." I shrugged a little when he looked at me again. "I've always been good at reading how people interact with each other." I stated simply.

We walked in silence through the forest, the wolf stopping to give me something to lean on whenever I tripped, which of course in the dark was twice as often as I had on the way to the meadow. By the fifth trip, the wolf was shaking slightly at the shoulder, turning his head away to hide the grin I knew was on his face, by the tenth trip he'd given up and was letting out loud choking barks of wolfish laughter. I couldn't help joining in, his laughter was infectious.

"Ok I know. I'm a clumsy person. I can't help it, I always have been and no doubt I always will be. Next time I'll talk you into letting me ride you." His laughter suddenly cut off and I walked a couple more paces before I noticed he'd stopped in his tracks, a faraway expression on his wolfy face. I stopped and waited for him to come back to himself. "You ok?" I asked as he shook his head and looked around for me. I'd never seen an animal look sheepish before (well except for a sheep of course, which didn't count) but the expression on his face at that moment couldn't be called anything else. He caught up and then walked a little ahead of me for the rest of the journey to my truck. He sat and watched me as I fished the keys out of my pocket, unlocked the door and climbed in. Before I closed the door I asked him.

"Am I right in guessing that you're going to follow me home to make sure I get there safely?" He nodded at me. "Well I would say that I'll go slowly so you can keep up, but judging by how fast you guys moved when you took out Laurent, I guess it would be pointless." He gave me another wolfy grin in answer and I closed the door. "See you there then." I said, knowing he'd hear me even through the door, and I started the engine with a loud roar and headed home.

Sure enough, when I pulled up at my house, I saw a vast black shape slip around the side of the building into the garden and I smiled a little to myself as I walked to my front door.

I had done it.

I'd found the wolves and secured protection, not just for Charlie, but for Sam and for myself too. I felt bad that I didn't feel worse about Laurent's sticky end, but He'd had every chance to not attack me, and he'd failed to take any of them, in the end he had no-one to blame for his death but himself. Oh and Victoria of course. I opened my front door and walked straight through to the back. Opening the door there and walking out a few steps, I saw the black wolf, almost completely out of sight in the shadows at the edge of my garden.

"Thank you. For seeing me home safely, for agreeing to protect Charlie, Sam and for me too, and thank you so much for not letting that dread locked dick kill me this evening. An amused snort came out of the shadows and I smiled. "Well I'm going to go in and grab that letter before Charlie gets home, so Goodnight. I'll be seeing you soon, no doubt. And thanks again." I went back inside and closed the door behind me. As I did, I heard Charlie's cruiser coming down the road and I sprint-tripped up the stairs as quickly as I could to grab the note from under his pillow. I was just in time. I had just made it into my room, stuffing the note roughly into my back pocket as he opened the front door. I debated throwing myself down onto my bed with a book and acting like I'd been there for a while, but that came far too close to lying to him for my liking, and I wasn't going to do that. Instead, I came out of my room just as he passed the bottom of the stairs and called down.

"Hey Dad. You have a good day's fishing?" He looked up at me, seeming a little distracted.

"Hi, Bella. Yes thanks, it was a pretty good day. I've already stashed my catch in the freezer at Billy's. We thought we'd have another cook out over at his tomorrow." I was immediately on edge. _"Bella? Did he just call me Bella?" _I thought. _"He never calls me that unless something's up. It's always Bells, or Kid, or Kiddo. Never Bella." _I walked down the stairs and followed the sound of his voice into the laundry room.

"Something wrong, Dad?" I asked tentatively. "You seem a little distracted." He looked up at me, and I realised I was wrong; distracted was _not _what he was. The word I was looking for was _angry. _

"I think you and I need to have a little talk, Bella." He said firmly. "In the kitchen I think." I followed him through to the kitchen, wondering what on earth could've made him mad. I didn't have to wonder for long. "I see you've moved it." He began, confusing me even more for a second before he clarified. "The note. I left it on top of the washer." My heart plummeted to my knees, which in turn became more than a little jellified. I pulled out a chair, wincing as I accidently banged my poor scalded hand against it and sat down with my hand resting on the table, blowing on it to try to relieve the pain a tiny bit. I really needed to take some painkillers as soon as possible. I continued to focus on my hand for a moment, desperately stalling for even a few brief seconds to work out what to say. He sat across from me at the table, fixing me with a firm expression. "Well?" he demanded.

"Ok. Yes, I moved it. I didn't ever want you to have to read it, and I hoped that as it was still folded, you hadn't." I told him honestly. _"Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuckity fuck fuckingtons. What am I going to tell him? It's either going to have to be a lie, or I'm going to have to tell him things I've promised not to tell anyone. Shit, shit, SHIT!"_

"Well unfortunately for you, I did read it, this morning, when I dropped back home to throw in a load of washing before heading out to fish with Billy and Harry." He thumped his hand down on the table, the bang sounding ridiculously loud in the silence surrounding us. "How do you think it felt to read that letter, Bella? Did you read it back after you wrote it? Do you know how it sounds? Can you imagine reading a letter like that from someone you care about? From your mom? From _me_?" I swallowed back the lump in my throat, fighting back the threatening tears. "You are going to tell me _exactly _what's going on here, and then we'll discuss whatever stupid, clearly dangerous plan you had set up to solve the problem."

"Dad, I'm sorry you read it, that you had to feel that way, but I couldn't _not _write it, not with the things that are happening." I took a deep breath and blew it out, completely unable to concentrate on bringing myself back to the calmness right at that moment. Realising that I had no other options, it was either lie, or tell him things he really shouldn't know, I tried for a very narrow middle ground. "Dad. There are promises I've made to people, secrets that I just _can't _tell, but I don't want to lie to you, so is there any way that I can tell you just enough without breaking those promises, and have you accept that I'm telling you all I can do?" I looked up at him hopefully. He let out a huge sigh.

"Look, Bells. I know about making promises to keep people's secrets, but the thing is, that from a couple of the things you said in your note, I actually think we each might know at least a little about the promises the other one of us has made." I wrinkled my brow at him in confusion. _"What's he talking about? What can I have said in the note that makes him think he knows anything at all about this whole thing?" _I wondered to myself. _"I need to tread carefully here, because whatever he thinks he knows, it's definitely _not _got anything to do with the supernatural. Still, at least we're back to 'Bells' again." _I chose my words carefully, not wanting to reveal anything I didn't need to.

"I'm not sure I'm following you here, Dad. What did I say in my note that give you a hint?" He wasn't fooled by my tactics. Rolling his eyes at me, he put out his hand.

"Give me the note." He said. "I'm pretty sure you've got it on one of your pockets right now, haven't you?" I reluctantly pulled the note out of my back pocket.

"How do you do that?" I muttered as I handed it over. He just gave me a little smirk and unfolded the paper. Scanning down the lines, he found what he was looking for.

"Here it is, 'If you really need to know a little of it, talk to Billy. He knows some of it, and tried in his own way to keep me safe.' Now I've made promises of my own, Bells, so I can't tell you certain things, but I do know there's only one thing that Billy might know about that would put either of us in danger, and if _that's _what you think you need to be sticking your nose back into again, then you're just out of luck, kid. I know a few people who can put a stop to any of that and not break a sweat." I tried to puzzle my way through what he was saying. _"What does he mean, he knows a few people?" _I couldn't figure that part out, unless he either knew about the wolves, and on top of that knew who they were, or he thought I was getting involved in drugs and was hinting he had 'connections' who could stop me. _"Well if it's to do with the wolves then he certainly hit on the right line of the letter, but I still can't assume anything… I'm going to have to tackle this side-on" _I decided.

"Dad, before I tell you anything, can I please ask you a couple of questions that'll probably sound really weird and nothing to do with the subject?" I braced myself for an angry retort, but his answer was almost enthusiastic, making me more suspicious about what he might know. Taking a deep breath, I launched in with question one. "Do you think there are things out there in the world that most people don't know about, or if they do, think they're just myths and legends?" I was walking pretty close to the edge; if he knew something about the supernatural, he'd hopefully be pleased that my question was heading us in the right direction. If he didn't, well I was about to be in a huge pile of trouble for trying to trivialise a serious matter. Judging by my face though, I was on the right track. He met my gaze with a serious look and simply stated.

"I know there are." I sighed. Despite all my hard work at keeping Charlie safe from knowing about the supernatural, it seemed he's got the knowledge elsewhere. All my hard work, al the lying and putting us both through hell had been for nothing. I needed to know just how much he knew.

"Ok. Well that clears a few things up. So who told you about these things?" If I knew _who _had told him, I could maybe work out just _what _he knew.

"Some of it I worked out for myself and then tricked Billy into confirming it for me, the rest was told to me by someone else, and I know I'm working a double standard here, Bells, but I can't tell you who that was. I've made promises of my own." As indignant as I felt about getting raked over the coals for keeping secrets from Charlie, when he was doing exactly the same thing, I could also understand why he was refusing to break his promises. We were both cut from the same cloth. Like father, like daughter.

"I guess I can accept that." I told him. "I don't like it, and I think it's grossly unfair that I'm in trouble for doing the same thing, but a promise is a promise so I guess I'll just have to suck it up." I groused. "So I figure we can cut out the double talk here. You know who Edward and the Cullens are, right?" he nodded solemnly.

"I know _what _they are, yes." I winced a little at the emphasis on the word _what. _I guessed that having got his knowledge from Billy, I could only expect that he'd gotten the Quileute's slant on the whole thing.

"And you understand why I couldn't tell you?" He gave another, more reluctant nod. "Then I'm betting you also know about the Quileute's own secrets." Again a nod. I threw myself back in my chair, frustrated beyond measure. "Well I wish I'd known that you knew, so I didn't have to go through what I did this evening." I snapped, forgetting for a second that Charlie hadn't known what I'd been up to. Hearing my own words reverberating around my head I squeezed my eyes together, wishing I could take that sentence back but it was too late, the damage was done.

"Go through what exactly?" Charlie ground out through his teeth. It was no good. I'd have to spill it all. I explained what had happened when I'd gone to watch the Cullens play baseball, what had really happened when I took off to Phoenix, and then I explained about Victoria being after me and the letter she'd left me. At each new fact, his face grew paler and paler, and when I finally revealed the truth about Victoria, the letter, and what I'd been up to that evening, he became as white as a sheet. When I finally stopped talking, silence rang through the kitchen for several minutes. Charlie opened his mouth several times to begin speaking, but each time thought better of what he was going to say and slammed his mouth closed again. Eventually I got up and went to the liquor cabinet, grabbing a bottle of scotch and two glasses. Sitting back at the table, I poured us each a healthy measure and slid hi glass across to him as I downed my own shot. Charlie raised a brow at me, then drank down his own in two swallows, then reaching across to the bottle, he poured another for himself and pointedly tucked the bottle between his knees without pouring me another.

"They thought she was after me, not you." He began, and when I raised a curious brow, he explained. "The red-head. The wolves thought that maybe she'd caught a whiff of me ad decided I'd make a good meal and so was gunning for me. I _knew _that something about it felt off; I couldn't work out why she'd insist that _I _was something she was owed." I was confused again.

"Dad, I think maybe you should tell me everything you know, except of course the bits you can't tell me, and then we can both ask any questions that might come up at the end. Otherwise we'll be here for days." He snorted in wry amusement at that and began to tell me everything he knew. He told me how he'd gone to Billy and one of the wolves in human form (though he said he couldn't tell me who the wolves were.) with his suspicions and tricked them into confirming them and I was proud of my dad's intuitiveness and interrogative skills. He told me how he'd been told about the Cullens, and he told me about being informed that Victoria was probably after him, and his decision to stick close to the Rez and to encourage me to do the same. When he'd finished, I was amazed at how close the wolves had come to working out what Victoria wanted, yet still missing the mark. I bet they were irritated as all hell now that I'd told them the real target was me. I couldn't find it in myself to feel bad for them. For weeks Charlie had known exactly who the people were that I desperately needed to find, while I had been unaware that they even existed for most of that time, and_ still_ didn't know who they were when they were wearing clothes. If he'd been able to share the secret with me, I would've been saved weeks of panic and depression, and I wouldn't have come within a breath of dying this evening at Laurent's hands. I took a deep breath, trying to shove down the indignation, and answered Charlie's questions.

"Bells, you said that this James came close to killing you in Phoenix." I nodded. "Well just what do you class as close?" I rolled back my sleeve and held out my arm, luckily not the one with the burnt hand, turning my wrist so that the shimmering scar caught the light. Charlie gasped and grabbed my hand, looking closer at the line of teeth marks. "Fuck!" he swore, obviously forgetting for a second who he was talking to. "That's more than close. How did you not turn into a vampire? I was told that all it took was a single bite."

"Ordinarily yes." I told him, taking back my arm and rolling the sleeve back down. I didn't like looking at the scar. "But vampires turn humans by injecting them with venom. Edward sucked the venom out before I could begin the change. It took a lot of will power for him to do it, and I was very close to not making it. If it hadn't have been for Edward and Carlisle, I wold either be dead or a vampire by now." I told Charlie honestly. He looked shaken again, and he reached down for the bottle and poured himself another small shot which he drank immediately.

"Well I guess I owe them some thanks for that, although it would've been unnecessary if they'd not dragged you into their world in the first place." He sounded a little bitter and I refused to allow him to be prejudiced by the Quileute's skewed perspective on the whole vampires versus werewolves debate. Charlie was in the know. Fine. I couldn't do anything about that now, as much as I wished he was still blissfully unaware of it all. But I'd be damned if he would pick a side, either teem vamp or tem wolf. He could be in the middle with me, not for or against either side, but supportive and accepting of both. Team Swan all the way.

"You should know, dad that they didn't drag me in. I bulldozed my way in, using the same weird intuition thing that you have, I worked out their secret and I marched up and told Edward I knew what he was, despite the number of times he tried to warn me off, told me he wasn't a good friend to have, that if I was smart I'd keep away. I still insisted on being a part of his life, of their lives, and barring the way they all left in the end, they were never anything but caring and considerate of me and my safety the whole time I knew them." I spoke quickly, not wanting to give him a chance to argue. "Also. It should be noted that without Edward, I would've been killed outright by Tyler's van when he lost control in the parking lot that day. Edward sped over at vampire speed, risking exposure, and then shoved the van away so it didn't crush me." Charlie looked surprised and went to reply, but I held up my hand to say my last point before he could speak. "Edward also saved me from at the very least being raped and most probably being killed one evening in Port Angeles." I finished, "So that's three occasions when knowing the Cullens in general, and Edward in particular saved my life. Without them, you'd have lost me for good over a year ago." I sat back, waiting for Charlie's response.

"Well it seems that I have a lot to thank them for after all." He said finally. "I will never forgive _Edward _for leaving you alone in the forest the way he did, but I can't deny that he also did a lot of good in saving your life. I guess Billy and the others have a naturally slanted viewpoint on the whole vampire issue." I smiled at him. _"I knew he'd see this from the right perspective." _I celebrated mentally. _"He's always been able to see to the heart of matters clearly once he has all the facts." _Charlie smiled back at me and reached across to take my good hand and squeeze it gently.

"Kiddo, I've got one more question, and then we'll wrap this up." I nodded at him in encouragement. It had been the longest, most eventful day I could remember having and I was completely exhausted, sore, and mentally spinning from the day. "You've been using _His_, I mean _Edward's_ name again, and it doesn't seem to be giving you any distress like it used to. Are you past it? Is all that trauma you went through over?" I smiled at the hope in his voice and on his face. We'd both of us suffered terribly during my stay in my pit, and I was as happy as I knew he would be that that period of my life was done with.

"Yes, dad. It's finished." I told him, squeezing his hand back. "I still feel a little sadness, some regret about how things ended. But it's just a quiet, healthy sort of sadness, not the destructive agony I felt before. He nodded in understanding, tears welling in his eyes, and clearly not able to speak. We sat there in silence again for another few minutes before Charlie spoke again.

"So now we both know most of what the other does, there will be no reason whatsoever for either of us to go pulling deluded heroic acts." He fixed me with a warning glare. "If there's trouble looming, we tell each other, and anyone we can think of who might be able to help, ok?" I grinned.

"Ok, dad. I promise. First I'll tell you, then anyone else who can help keep us safe. But you have to promise the same thing. I don't get my heroic tendencies from mom, you know." With a laugh, Charlie shook my hand, making me wince as his touch flared the pain from the burn.

"I promise too, Bells." He said and pulled me into a slightly awkward hug. After a moment we broke apart and I rinsed out the glasses while Charlie put the bottle away, calling over his shoulder

"No more of this for you, young lady. You're still underage and I'm still a cop you know." I laughed and agreed.

"No problems, Chief. I can't stand the stuff anyway."

We both trudged slowly up the stairs and after a quick "goodnight" opened our respective bedroom doors. Just as I was about to close mine, Charlie called out to me.

"Oh, Bells. I forgot to ask." He said, poking his head back around his bedroom door. "What happened to your hand?"


	31. Chapter 30: Burnt Breakfasts & Bathrooms

**So I know a few of you don't like to get the repeated scenes in Sam's POV, but until all misunderstandings and secrets are out, it's the only way I can make sure everyone understands exactly what each character is thinking. There is a plus side for you though - You get another lemon, this time from Sam's perspective and I don't know about you, but personally I think it's much hotter from his side of the fence! lol**

**I tried to get the whole of the last few Bella chapters covered in Sam's POV into one chapter, but as it's currently running at over 16000 words, I figured I'd best split it up, so here's part 1 for you, the rest will follow either tonight or early tomorrow, depending on how tired my poor fingers get.**

**Be warned - graphic lemony naughtiness of the boy/girl variety, so if you're too young, or easily offended, stop reading now! :0)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 30: Burnt Breakfasts and Bathroom Floors

Sam POV

"No no no no no no no no no no no." Dawn was just breaking when I was nudged out of my sleep by Bella mumbling in hers, her feet kicking against the covers and her hand tugging at her own hair. By the sounds of it she was having a pretty unpleasant dream and I wondered if I should wake her, or let her work through it herself. I tucked her more firmly against my front and buried my nose in her hair, taking a deep breath of her scent as I pondered what to do. _"I guess I'll just wait and see if it gets worse, and if it does, I'll wake her then." _I decided, closing my eyes and soaking in the amazing feeling of Bella in my arms. _"I'm going to find it difficult to keep my emotional distance with this woman." _I realised. It was a worrying thought. Quite aside from the fact that if I let myself feel too deeply for her, I'd only wind up hurting myself, or worse – her, if I ever imprinted on someone, there was the sobering truth that she herself was not interested in getting into something serious with me. _"One day in the not too distant future, this amazing woman is going to leave for college and I'll be stuck here, busily taping Band-Aids to my broken heart unless I'm more careful and hold my emotions in check"_ I reminded myself firmly. I was distracted by another series of distress murmurings from Bella, but even with my enhanced hearing, I couldn't make out any words. I let her sleep on. Just as I was beginning to doze back off myself, she spoke again, this time with crystal clarity, as if she were wide awake, and I froze in shock and confusion.

"Yeah, yeah, Taha Aki, I know…" her petulant tone sloped off into incoherent mumbles again, but there was no mistaking what she'd said, _who _she was speaking to. _"Ok, that's twice now. Where the fuck did she hear that name? And why is she talking to him in her dreams? Does she even know who the name belongs to, what he is to the tribe, or is it just a funny name to her that she heard from somewhere and her unconscious trots the name out when she's sleepy?"_ I was incredibly frustrated by the mystery, and also desperate to know who could've broken the taboo and spoken to someone outside the tribe about Taha Aki. Less than ten seconds later my frustration and annoyance flew out of the window as I was faced with a much more disturbing issue.

Bella's dreams had obviously taken a shift in direction and although she was no longer talking, she _was _moaning and beginning to grind her ass back into my groin. The already delicious scent coming from her shifted into the intoxicating smell of her arousal and there was nothing I could do to keep my dick from hardening in response. My hips began to grind back into her as she ground against me, I wasn't me doing it deliberately, they simply moved of their own volition and I had a real job to get them back under control. _"You promised Charlie, You promised Charlie." _I reminded myself over and over again, and tried to pull my hips back away from her completely so we were no longer in contact below the waist, but even in her sleep she was persistent and relentless in her mission to turn me on beyond all human restraint. _"Yes, well luckily for everyone concerned, you're not completely human!" _I pointed out to myself firmly and gently, but deliberately I peeled myself away from Bella and slid out of the bed.

Standing alongside the bed as she squirmed and moaned in desire along with whatever was happening in her dream, I'd never felt more torn in my life; The morally upright part of me was fighting a valiant but losing battle against the combined forces of my baser human side and my instinct driven wolf side, Both of which were begging, threatening, pleading, with me to climb back into that bed, wake Bella up and give her more of what she'd been dreaming about, or maybe even better that what she was dreaming about. The morally bankrupt side was winning, and with a quiet growl, I made one last desperate move to do the right thing and spun around, throwing myself out of the room. In the clearer air in the hallway, still hearing her moans but away from the heady scent of Bella and her arousal, it was a little easier to keep my head. _"Holy shit, I can't believe I nearly lost control like that. I promise Charlie I wouldn't take advantage of her, and waking her from a dream like that and using it for my own gratification would've been pretty much the dictionary definition of taking advantage!" _I shook my head angrily at myself and looked down. My still rock hard and throbbing dick stared back up at me, poking past the waist band of my cut-offs.

"Well who asked you for your opinion?" I snapped at it. "If you think I'm going to reward you for your part in that appalling behaviour, you've got another think coming!" I said, and stormed off towards the bathroom and a very, _very _cold shower.

Even with the water as cold as I could get it, it took me nearly half an hour in the shower to get my dick to give up and go down. Not even my old freshman trick of imagining gross things was helping, and I really tried;

_"Maggots on road kill, women with hairy arm pits, dog shit McFlurries, oh come on, for fuck's sake. These should be working…. Erm…. Erm… OH! Old Quil in a bikini, giving Billy a lap-dance."_ That last one did it, but I stood there under the flow of water for another ten minutes just to make sure the effect really soaked in.

Daylight was really taking hold by the time I left the shower, throwing on a pair of cut-offs and towelling off my hair roughly, and as there was no way in hell I was going to go back into my room while Bella was still asleep in there, I figured I might as well do something nice for her and cook a really nice breakfast, in part because I just wanted to, and in part to ease my guilty conscience after nearly breaking and taking advantage of her like that. Like all brilliant plans, the actual execution wasn't as straight forward as the initial idea had been, and before long I was the not so proud creator of a trash bag full of solid black disks which had been intended to be pancakes, a pan of something grey with rusty brown flecks, which had started out as a perfectly acceptable batch of scrambled eggs before the lining of the pan decided to lift off and get mixed in, and a newly warped and blackened frying pan with a melted plastic pair of tongs welded to the bottom along with the last of the bacon. Hearing Bella stirring in my room, I quickly opened the kitchen window to let out the smell of burning plastic, metal, pancakes and bacon, and began frantically throwing the evidence of the burnt and ruined cookware into the sink to dispose of later on. She wandered in, trying to tame her hair which looked all sexy and tousled just as I was ditching the frying pan, swearing under my breath about how easy she'd made cooking look the night before and I quickly grabbed a cup of coffee off the kitchen counter – the only thing I hadn't manage to completely cock up - and spun around to offer it to her, feeling a little panicked about what she might say about the state of the kitchen, and with no idea what I could offer her for breakfast now my brilliant plan had turned out a lot less brilliant that I'd thought.

"Oh…. Umm…. Morning, Bella. Sleep ok?" I stammered as she accepted the coffee cup and took a big sip.

"Great, thanks." She replied with a smile and a blush. I guessed the blush came from remembering that dream. "How about you?" To my horror her question brought a blush on my own face and I started back up with the stammering.

"Y-yeah, just f-fine thanks." I cleared my throat. Deciding it was best to just be up front about my breakfast disaster – there was no way she hadn't noticed anyway and trying to hide it would make me look even more ridiculous - I just spat it out. "I erm, tried to get a decent breakfast together for you, but seeing as how I can burn water, it didn't go so well." I gestured sheepishly towards the sink where the smoking pan was by this point sizzling slightly under the flow of the cold water and gave a little chuckle. Thankfully she saw the funny side too and joined in with her own giggle. "But I do a rocking line in cereal if you want some." I grabbed a box of Cheerio's from a cupboard and she nodded.

"That'd be fine, really, but I appreciate the attempt." She really was great – trying to make me feel better about the whole thing. I grinned at her and she returned it as I took a sip of my coffee. "Do you mind if I take a shower first though? You're so hot, you had me dripping all night."

!

!

!

I instantly started choking on my coffee at this statement, all too aware of how wet she probably really had gotten during that dream – hell I'd been able to smell it a little even in the bathroom, which hadn't helped me get my dick back down. The coffee came out of my nose which, while painful, was a welcome distraction and prevented me from getting another badly timed hard-on, and Bella suddenly burst into flames as she realised just exactly what she'd just said. "NO! I mean… I didn't….. I meant….. Oh Fuck it." She put both my hands in my face and stood there shaking her head and I began to mix hysterical laughter in with my choking. She really was hilarious when she was embarrassed, _"Especially when she then talks about how embarrassing something is and tried to be all dignified about it." _I reminded myself, thinking briefly of how she'd handled the condom incident outside the Forks grocery store.

"Ok well once again I've managed to embarrass the hell out of myself, so with that I'm going to go shower and see if I can wash my shame away in the process." She stated with as much dignity as she could muster, proving the point I'd just made to myself and sparking off an even louder round of laughter from me. She took a deep breath and turned to walk off to the bathroom, while I leaned against the kitchen counter, desperately trying to catch my breath and tone down the howling laughter before I broke a rib.

Once I'd finally got myself back under control, I figured now was a good time to quickly phase and check in with the pack to make sure nothing unusual had happened the night before so I headed towards the door, trying hard not to picture Bella stripping off in the bathroom as I passed by. I was partially successful – at least I wasn't fully hard as I walked outside and pulled off my shorts, preparing to phase.

Then she screamed.

A hideous, bloodcurdling sound and I was moving before the tiniest thought could enter my head, rushing back inside and towards the bathroom door to save her from whatever was attacking her. I burst through the locked door with a loud crack and a flurry of splinters, and shot into the room shoulder first, shaking as I tried to hold off my phasing and growling lowly under my breath as I cast wild eyes about the room, urgently trying to find the danger.

I couldn't find anything. She was completely alone in the room until I'd burst in, and when I finally looked at her, she was completely, gloriously naked, the water from the shower running down her perfect, porcelain skin in little trails that my tongue was itching to follow. As I stared at her, taking in her clear, milky skin, her firm breasts, her tiny waist, her rounded hips, and her beautiful pussy, waxed almost completely apart from a tiny little strip, I noticed that she was staring right back at me, her eyes raking over my naked form, and then stalling as she stared at my half hard cock, which was rapidly growing harder and longer under her scrutiny. Just having her standing there, naked and wet from the shower, and staring at me like that was so _fucking hot_, that I couldn't contain the slight groan that escaped me, causing her eyes to lift, dragging over my body on the way up to look at my face. Not even my embarrassment or shock at bursting in to the room after that scream only to find her fine, but naked could cut through the lust that was building inside me, fully encouraged by my wolf, who'd been extremely frustrated and angry with me when I ran out of the bedroom earlier, and I let my eyes drag themselves over her body one last time before finally meeting her gaze. Without considering the consequences, I breathed in sharply through my nose, searching out her scent which would be heightened as she was wet from the shower, and I instantly felt my grip on my self-control begin to slide, like soap covered fingers across a mirror. I could feel my expression hardening along with my cock. Finally she moved, her hand raising to turn off the shower and her movement freed up my own, as unthinking, I took a step forward, then another stalking my prey like the predator I was. My brain was shutting down, the wolf beginning to take over completely, and I tried desperately to drag my human side forward once more. The question of whether or not we were going to have sex was, as far as I was concerned, now a moot one; from the smell and look of it, she was just as aroused as I was, I wasn't taking advantage this time. But I didn't want to be too rough with her, and with my wolf so close to the surface, that was a real possibility. A sudden increase in the scent of arousal drifting off her made all my efforts redundant and my control flew out of the window, I was vaguely aware of my low growl before she stepped forward, clashing our bodies together in a frenzy of sucking, licking and biting mouths and grasping, clawing hands.

Her body was cool against mine and her tightly pebbled nipples brushing against me sent my lust a little higher, as did her moan a moment later as she began to rock against my thigh which I'd unconsciously worked in between hers. As my hard and throbbing cock pressed into her belly, I let go an answering groan and she clawed against my back, pulling me even closer to her, and causing my wolf to silently howl his approval. A vague memory of her liking it when we were in the parking lot, made me run one hand up her spine to tangle roughly into her hair and pull her head back, exposing her neck to me, and I dragged my mouth away from hers and began to suck and nibble my way from her collar bone up to her jaw as she groaned in approval. It was just as well that she liked my dominant side; I had no control over it at all by this point, and with my wolf spurring me on, and more than half taking the lead, I was only going to get more dominant as things heated up.

"Oh God!" She moaned huskily and with this evidence that she was enjoying the slightly rough treatment, my control slipped another few millimetres and my mouth grew rougher against her skin, marking her deliberately by sucking what was sure to become a dark bruise into her neck where it joined her shoulder. I turned us and backed her forcefully against the wall, using the shreds of control to make sure I didn't actually hurt her with the move. She obviously didn't mind, as she arched her back to press herself harder into me.

Leaving her neck now, I began kissing my way downwards, pausing to nip at her collarbones again. Through my frayed control, my wolf was demanding to sample the source of that wonderful, heady, intoxicating scent, and, the spirits help me, I couldn't find even the tiniest part of me that objected to _that _idea. When I reached her breasts I paused to play a little, now that the wolf and I were in agreement, neither of us needed to rush forward to win the struggle for control, so we were both content to enjoy the landmarks on the route to our eventual destination. I took her hard left nipple into my mouth, my right hand finding the other and pinching it hard, and I could smell her get even more excited as I did so, bringing forth another groan of approval from me which coincided with one of her own. I let my teeth graze against the hardened bud, sharpening the pleasure with a tiny edge of pain, and then I switched my mouth and hand to give her the same treatment on the other side. Incoherent sounds came from her, but I took them as approval for what I was doing and a plea for more and continued what I was doing.

"Mmm. Ahhh. Fuck. Oh FUCK! Sam!" She babbled, and both the man in me and the wolf in me rejoiced in the knowledge that she was a talker in bed; Leah hadn't been, and it had inhibited my own desire to be vocal, making me feel awkward whenever I made any sound, let alone spoke. With that inhibition removed, I gave in to my need to vocalise myself, and with the wolf so close to the surface, my moaning was equally mixed with growls which seemed to excite her even more, and the call of her arousal scent finally broke the last of my control. I dragged my mouth away from her breast and down her body, leaving a hot wet trail down her body as I zeroed in on my target. I was vaguely aware of her weak protests, not at first understanding what I was intending, and then her protests stopped as my mouth finally made contact with her clit, sucking and licking and lightly nibbling while my wolf and I lost ourselves in our task, til she lost all control and came with a loud scream.

"AHHHHHH! OHHHH SHIT! FUUUCK!" Her voice echoed off the bathroom walls and she sank to the floor, dragging me down with her to eventually lie on top of her. She lay gasping and shaking, not realising I was not even close to done. I ran one hand up her thigh, and then parted her glorious pussy with my fingers as I circled her sensitive clit once again with my tongue. She spasmed and shuddered, making beautiful grunts and groans that I would play over and over again in my head for years to come as I pressed one finger inside her. _"Holy fuck is she tight! She must do Kegel exercises for hours to keep that up!" _the brief lucid thought flew through my mind and was lost in the swirling lust and I withdrew my finger, only to replace it with two pressing back in again. I curled my fingers upwards, searching for her G spot and knew that I'd found it when she sat up and screamed in pleasure, coming again, harder than before, as I sucked hard on her clit. As she came, I felt a rush of hot wetness on my face from her pussy and for a second I thought that I'd lose all control of myself and howl in approval. _"Just when I thought she couldn't get any more perfect, she turns out to be a gusher! Fuck that's awesome!" _ I managed to turn my howl into a loud moan of pleasure.

"Oh fuck yes, baby, that's right, cum for me. Soak me. Fuck that's so fucking hot! I'm covered in your cum." I couldn't stop myself from talking now I knew it wouldn't bother her and as she rode out the last of her huge orgasm, I swiftly slid up her body and plunged deep into her in one thrust. Her hair was plastered over her face so I couldn't see her eyes, but she clearly enjoyed the sudden move to fill her as she bit into my shoulder to muffle her scream of pleasure. Such an animalistic display went right to my cock, and my wolf was beside himself. The loud growl that I let loose with came from both of us and as I moved my hands up, one to rest on the floor beside her shoulder and the other to drag her hair out of her face and into my fist, I had to clench my teeth to keep from cumming right there and then. With our difference in body temperature, I'd expected to feel her cool around my cock, but the truth was that somehow, the tight, wet velvet grip around me was even hotter than I was and I muttered a few curse words through my teeth as I tried to claw back the tiny bit of control I had left to me.

"OhfuckmeBellayou'resofuckingtight!" I garbled, my fist gripping her hair tighter as I fought for control, trying to hold still for a moment to allow her tight pussy to adjust to my, admittedly larger than average, and probably larger than anything she'd encountered before, length buried deep inside her. Gradually there came a very slight change in the tight grip she had on my cock, but I held still for myself this time, knowing that the slightest movement would have me either shooting instantly like a kid whacking off for the first time, or losing my last fingernail's grip on control and hammering into her like a wild animal.

She shifted her hips a little, clearly wanting me to get on with it, and her movement dragged a long, desperate groan from me.

"Fuck, Bella. You need to keep still or I'm going to lose it too quick. You're so fucking tight, shit I've never felt anything this good in my life." I moaned and damn if the little minx didn't get a mischievous little smile on her face. I felt a moment of dread as I realised what she was about to do, and sure enough, she clenched her pussy walls a little, causing my jaw to clench even tighter and my eyes to slam shut. "PLEASE, Bella. Please. You've got to stop that or I'm not gonna last more than a minute here. Baby, please. Oh fuckfuckfuck!" I warned and begged but she paid me no heed and clenched once again.

I lost it.

My last thread of control broke and my wolf was now running the show.

With an animalistic roar, I pulled her head to one side by her hair and roughly sucked and nipped once more at the place where I'd already marked her a little.

"So you're going to be naughty then?" I asked her, my voice rough and harsh, my dominant side completely exposed. If I'd been aware of my surroundings enough to worry about whether she'd object to my sudden authoritative tone and my roughness, my fears would've been put quickly to rest, as the already strong scent of arousal suddenly spiked. Not only did she not object; she _liked it._ Plunging into her hard and fast, driving her into the floor tiles, I grunted and groaned, Bella making similar noises herself as we both rushed headlong towards our orgasms. As rough as I was being, she was giving as good as she got, her rising to meet my every thrust and one of her legs lifting to give me yet deeper access and to hook around my lower back, pulling me back after ever retreat. Our rough movements caused us to travel across the floor, our sweat slick bodies making the movement impossible to resist if we'd tried and before long, her head was knocking against the base of the toilet. I was far too far gone to care, and thankfully so was she.

"Oh God. Oh Shit. Oh FUCK….. SAAAAM!" She screamed as I finally drove her headlong over the edge.

My own roar of "BELLAAAA!" joined her echoing screams as I too came, my hips and hers hammering against each other as both our bodies struggled to eke the last few scraps of pleasure before collapsing together on the tiled floor in a steaming, sweaty, sticky, panting, moaning mess.

It was several minutes before either of us moved.

Obviously I couldn't speak for Bella, but for my part, I was, for the moment anyway, completely drained, and on top of that, as my wolf retreated and I began to think more as my human self, I was suddenly very concerned about how rough I'd been with her. Until then, all my experiences with sex had been slow, loving and romantic. This rough, animalistic fucking was nothing I'd ever experienced before and I didn't know how I felt about it from my own perspective, much less what she'd have to say about it. It had been the single most amazing sexual experience of my life, and I hoped that she had enjoyed even half as much as I had, and that she'd want to repeat it over and over, but I was worried that I'd ruined it when I lost my grip on my wolf side.

Eventually she shifted a little under me, and her movement reminded me that I was compounding my mistake by squashing her, though the fact that she hadn't complained about it gave me hope that I hadn't completely blown it. I rolled off her to one side and raised my head from the crook of her shoulder where it had been resting to kiss her softly on the mouth. Still no complaint and she didn't pull away from me, so my hopes rose a little more and I reminded myself that she'd been giving back as good as she got. Remembering how I'd upset her when I apologised for the kiss in the parking lot, before I'd explained why I was apologising, I decided to avoid doing the same this time and instead thought I'd keep things as light as I could. I laid my forehead on her shoulder and still panting, I asked.

"So what was the screaming about?" I mentally braced myself for a blistering set down, and instead was delighted to hear her start to giggle, her laughter getting louder and louder as I joined in in relief, both of us shaking with mirth, and it was several minutes before she was able to get enough control to reply.

"The shower." I looked at her confused. "It was fucking freezing!" She explained and I realised I'd not changed the controls back after my icy shower after leaving her in bed. I gave her a sheepish, apologetic smile.

"Oh. I thought someone had sneaked in and was attacking you or something." She snorted.

"Yeah I figured as much." I pushed myself up until I was sitting, reaching out to grab her hand and pull her up with me. _"Looks like she's not even slightly pissed at me over this. She really is completely amazing." _I thought, but I needed to make it clear to her nonetheless that this wasn't what I'd planned for our first time together. Making extra sure to not make the same mistake I had in the parking lot I looked her seriously in the eye.

"I hadn't planned to do this with you this soon, and certainly not on the bathroom floor, but I'm not even going to pretend to be sorry." I said and she smiled at me.

"I'm not sorry either." She said simply, "But if you could fix the water temperature for me, I'd really like that shower now." She had completely set my mind at ease without even trying. I grinned at her, completely relaxed.

"Sure sure." I said. "You mind if I join you?" Amazingly she blushed. _"Wow. How does she manage to keep that innocence thing going, when it's clear she's totally not?" _I wondered admiringly loving that she could manage it. It was so endearing to see the red creeping over her cheeks at the suggestion of a joint shower, when only a few minutes before she'd been moaning and screaming and thrusting back at me almost as hard as I was plunging into her. A second later she managed to fight the redness down a little and she shrugged nonchalantly.

"Sure, that'd be nice."

"I love that you can still blush so innocently, even straight after that." I told her, running one finger over her still reddened cheek, bringing the blush straight back again to my delight. Narrowing her eyes, she gave me a mock glare, sticking out her tongue at him playfully. _"Innocence mixed with a touch of minx" _I thought approvingly, and I gave a snort of laughter and pushed myself up to my feet.

"I'm going to need a hand up, please." She told me. "I'm not sure my knees have come back online yet." I laughed again and held out a hand to help her up. Hauling her to her feet, I had to hold her steady when, as predicted, her knees were still too jellied to keep her upright. With one arm around her waist I led her back over to the shower, and remembered to change the controls before turning on the water and lifting her in to stand under the now deliciously warm fall of water. She gave an appreciative little groan which at any other time would've had me growing hard, but I shook off the desire to start thing up again – she was clearly exhausted, and I stepped in myself, crowding up against her and reaching for the shampoo. Despite our intimate position, and the fact that with my wolfy stamina I was definitely able to go again if I wanted, I fought back the urge to make anything sexual of it, settling instead for relaxed and sensual, washing each other's bodies gently and washing her hair for her. She was too short to be able to reach my hair to wash it, and when she suggested I kneel down so she could reach I shook my head with a little smile.

"As exhausted as I am, I don't think I could kneel in front of you and not dive in face first for a second round." I explained, wincing internally at the little white lie about being exhausted. She blushed once again, which in turn made me chuckle. As the water began to cool, we both stepped out and we towelled each other dry before she wrapped a towel around herself and one around her hair, and I tucked one around my hips.

"Is that cereal still up for grabs?" She asked as we left the bathroom.

"Yeah, of course." I replied, wishing I'd not burned all the other food in the house. I was sure she could do with something more substantial than just cereal, and I could've eaten a horse. With saddle and bridle attached. "How about you go get dressed and I'll go sort out some breakfast for us?" She grinned up at me.

"Thanks, Sam. I'm starving though and I'm not sure cereal is going to cut it just be itself." She thought for a moment. "If you pour us some cereal while I dress, I'll cook us up some bacon, eggs and pancakes too follow while you dress." She offered and my eyes lit up for a second at the thought before I remembered gain that I'd killed all the food and my face fell.

"That'd be perfect except I already burned all the food I had in the place." She snickered a little at my cooking disaster, and I was glad she saw the funny side.

"Ok. Then you pour us some cereal, I'll dress, and then we'll head to the diner for a proper breakfast once we've taken the edge off our hunger with some cheerio's. How's that?" She asked and my grin came back full force.

"A woman after my own heart." I said and snatching a quick kiss, I gently pushed her in the direction of the bedroom to dress while I headed to the kitchen to pour us some cereal.

I quickly set out a couple of bowls of Cheerio's for us and then ran out the back to complete the phase I'd had to abort when I heard Bella scream. If I didn't take the opportunity right then, I'd have to make an excuse to do so later and I didn't want to lie to her. Even that little white lie about being completely exhausted so that she didn't realise I had supernatural stamina had pinched at my conscience and I wanted to avoid any more lies if possible.

As soon as I phased in I was aware of Paul and Jared's minds.

_"Hey, Boss. How did the quiet, movie at home date go?" _Jared asked cheerily. Though I tried to snatch the thought back again, I was too late and Jared and Paul were treated to a few blurred scenes of the previous evening and mine and Bella's flirting, teasing games, and then, hot on the heels of that, a few steamy snippets of what we'd just been doing on the bathroom floor before I could put a lid on my thoughts. Jared let out a loud mental whistle and called

_"Hell, Boss. Way to go! Did you leave a hole in the floor?" _I rolled my eyes and declined to answer, making the two of them howl with laughter.

_"See. I told you she must've got around before." _Paul sneered. _"Nice girls don't put out like that. Not so soon, and certainly not on the bathroom floor!" _I growled loudly at him.

_"Careful, Paul. I've warned you before about watching how you talk about her." _I told him sternly.

"Yeah, well I can't wait to show that image to Jake." Paul said, still not bothering to hide the sneer in his tone. _"He's firmly convinced that Bella's an untouched angel, and he makes me sick when he tries to make me admit I'm wrong. We'll see who has to admit who's wrong once he sees _that!_" _I didn't hesitate for a second. Layering the Alpha tone over my voice, I immediately issued an order.

**_"Neither of you, Paul, or Jared, is to think of those memories when either Jacob or Embry is phased with you." _**I told them. _"Sorry to have to include you in that, Jared, but we both know that Paul would try to goad you into thinking about it and get around the order that way if I hadn't."_ I explained and Paul grumbled and muttered in the background.

_"No problem, Boss. You're right, he would've done, and I like Bella – I wouldn't want to accidently support one of Paul's theories at her expense."_ Jared answered cheerfully_. "Jake and Embry handed over the patrol about half an hour ago, said there was nothing to report." _He returned to business, sensing that I was in a hurry and in no mood to put up with any horsing around just then.

_"Thanks, Jared." _I replied gratefully. _"Billy and Harry are going out fishing with Charlie today, so one of you needs to be shadowing them at all times while the other patrols today. You can trade off or stick to one task each, whichever you prefer." _I told them. _"I'll take over with Embry at four thirty."_

_"Ok, Boss." _Jared answered with his usual cheery tone.

"_Fine." _Paul replied, still surly after having been given an Alpha order and most probably due to having his 'entertainment' at Bella's and Jake's expense. I phased out without dignifying Paul's attitude with a response and quickly went back inside, re-wrapping the towel around me and just coming in in time to hear Bella call out.

"Sam. Do you mind if I borrow a shirt?" She called down the hall towards the kitchen. "Mine's in serious need of retirement." I chuckled and called back.

"No problem. I think there are a few old t-shirts from two or three years ago, before my growth spurt in the back of my closet. Help yourself."

I sat down at the table and began shovelling the slightly soggy cereal into my mouth. I really was starving. A few minutes later, Bella came in. I looked up as she walked in and instantly froze for a second. _"Fuck me. That's so hot, seeing her in my clothes. I can't imagine how much hotter she'd look in _just _one of my shirts." _I struggled against my dick's desire to get hard again at the sight of her. Before she could catch me staring and ask what the problem was, I looked back down at my bowl and ate my last few bites as calmly as I could manage. I gestured for her to sit next to me at the table where I'd set her bowl of cheerio's for her and she sat down and grabbed her spoon.

"This table is huge. Where did it come from?" She asked me before taking her first bite.

"Oh it used to be over in the drop-in centre, but it was getting a bit the worse for wear and they decided to replace it, so I took it off their hands." I explained. "Most of my place was furnished that way – that's why none of it matches." I gave a wry chuckle, a little ashamed at the shabbiness of my place, and she looked around the table, noting no doubt the variety of chairs dotted around it.

"I like it." She told me. "It's got character and it makes the place look more lived in." I snorted loudly and stood up, taking my bowl over to the sink and washing it out.

"It makes the place look more like a yard sale, is what it does, but it's all sturdy furniture, though old and worn, and I'm planning on slowly replacing each piece as I have the money until I have a whole house-full of matching sets." I explained. For some reason feeling that I needed to excuse myself for my lack of money. I looked around at her as he dried his hands on one corner of the towel I still wore around my hips. "It should only take seventy to eighty years." I laughed and she joined in, no trace of derision in her laughter, which made me feel relieved. Leah wouldn't have taken the squalid appearance of the house quite so well, although she'd be as polite as she could manage, there would've been no disguising her dismay at the place.

"Well I'm going to quickly get changed so we can head out for a real breakfast as soon as you're done there." I said, walking towards the door. "That cereal barely put even a suggestion of a shadow of a dent in my hunger this morning." I gave her a dirty little grin. "Somehow I've managed to work up a real appetite even though it's still early." I said, waggling my eyebrows. As I'd hoped, she blushed again, and I walked out to get dressed, chuckling under my breath as I went.


	32. Chapter 31: Insults and Injuries

**Please don't be too upset with me... I wanted to get this updated earlier today, but I suddenly had a brilliant little twist to add that became a brilliant big twist as my characters grabbed hold and ran with it, making the part 2 of Sam's POV which was almost completed except for proof reading last night, twice as long as it had been, meaning I had to split it a third time. I'm just completeing part 3 now, but figured you'd all much rather have one chapter tonight and another tomorrow, rather than wait and get 2 tomorrow once I've finished tinkering with part 3. So here's tonight's chapter and I promise I'll have the last part up tomorrow.**

**Still, 4 humongous chapters in 4 days is a pretty good treat eh? ;0P**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit.**

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Chapter 31: Insults and Injuries

Walking into my room to get dressed, I thought once again about how good Bella had looked in my shirt. I'd not realised just how extreme my growth spurt had been until I saw her walk out in my t-shirt, only a size or two too big for her. If she'd put on a shirt that fit me these days, it'd look like a dress on her and it'd drop off one shoulder. Sternly fighting back that sexy image in my mind, I grabbed a pair of cut-off jeans from my closet, dropped my towel and pulled them on. I grabbed my towel off the floor and looked around for the towels Bella had been using so I could throw the lot into the washer. She'd left hers neatly folded and draped over the back of the wooden chair in the corner. As I picked hers up, a familiar and unmistakable smell caught my nose.

Blood.

I froze in my tracks, wet towels dropping from my numb fingers. _"Did I hurt her?" _I ran my mind back through the order of events, wincing to myself as I noted several occasions where it was almost certain that I'd caused her some discomfort or pain. The slam against the wall, the relentless pounding into the floor, the banging of her head against the toilet. Any of these could easily have caused some damage. I recalled the deep scratches and the bite that Bella had given me and for a split second I considered that maybe the smell was my own blood. I had to quickly dismiss that thought though; I healed so quickly that I doubted there'd even been as much as a pink line left behind by the time we'd showered. That had been why I'd made sure we'd stayed face to face in the shower. I didn't want her to notice the absence of scratches and ask awkward questions.

I thought for a moment of how she'd looked in the shower, running my mind's eye down the front of her body. Apart from the dark hickey I'd left by her collarbone, which hadn't broken the skin, there were no injuries to be seen, and I'd felt no lumps or bumps on her head when I washed her hair, so whatever damage I'd done had to be on her back. Probably as a result of the wall slam or the floor pounding. She hadn't said anything, so I hoped it wasn't much more than a few scratches, but I wouldn't be at ease until I knew.

Picking up the towels again, I took them out to the washer and threw them in with some washing powder and set the load to washing, then went back to the kitchen to find Bella tackling the debris left behind after my cooking disaster in the sink. She turned and gave me a cheery smile as I walked in and I wondered how I should broach the subject. _"Bella, why didn't you tell me I'd hurt you? I'm so sorry." _It sounded ok in my head, but I suspected that it would spoil the happy relaxed atmosphere between the two of us, and as she hadn't said anything herself, I also figured that she was intending to keep whatever damage I'd done to herself. I decided not to ask her outright, but to go the sneaky route instead. Walking slowly to stand behind her at the sink, I quietly sniffed at her, trying to narrow down the search by scent. It wasn't something I'd tried before and I was surprised at how well it worked. I could smell the blood pooled under her skin by her collarbone where I'd left that hickey, but it was a fainter, muffled scent as the skin hadn't actually been broken. "Huh. So that's what a bruise smells like." I made a mental note in case I ever needed it in the future. The same scent, along with a tiny trace of blood was coming from a spot near the centre of her lower back. Hoping that tiny trace, which couldn't have been more than a scratch was the worst of it, but not willing to assume and miss something, I took a second sniff. All I detected was more of the bruise scent, only fainter coming from lower on her body and I recalled the way I'd gripped her hips and thighs. _"Yeah. That will've left a few bruises." _I thought. I would've felt guilty about it, but again I recalled the gouges she'd dug into me with her nails, and that bite she'd given me and I figured that had I been completely even, I probably would've come out the worst, so I didn't see the point in angsting over it now. _"I'll be more careful next time though!" _I promised myself.

Stepping forward, I ran my hands up her hips and to her waist, "accidentally" lifting the hem of her shirt as I did so. There it was. That other bruise I'd scented, with a large but shallow scratch running through it. It must've been from the relentless pounding I'd given her on the floor and I felt a flash of guilt. I should've been more careful. I again promised myself that the next time I would be and I again debated apologising to her for the injury, but she seemed so cheerful that I couldn't bring myself to ruin her mood. Deciding to keep it to myself, I simply slipped my hands around her waist under the t-shirt and looped them around her front, pulling her gently up against my front. I kissed the side of her neck gently and murmured.

"Leave it, Bella. I'm just going to throw them all out and get new ones so you can cook for me and save me from my own ineptitude." She giggled and turned in my arms to kiss me back.

"I was hoping you'd say something like that." She said. "Come on – let's go get some proper breakfast." And so we headed out.

It'd been so long since I went to the diner for breakfast on the weekend that I'd completely forgotten just how busy they got. We took the only two remaining seats up at the counter and waited to be served. I didn't think that Bella noticed, but as we walked in, the buzz of conversation died down and then intensified as we sat down. All around us the other customers had just one topic of conversation. Us. With my enhanced hearing I could hear every version of the debate about the new chief and his new woman, and I determinedly blocked it all out of my hearing, refusing to let the local gossips ruin this day that had started out so incredibly. I wasn't going to let anyone or anything put a dampener on my post-sex high. As our waitress approached, I suddenly remembered just _why _I hadn't been in the diner on the weekend for long enough to forget how busy it got. Leah. _"Oh shit. This isn't going to be pleasant. We should've gone somewhere else. FUCK! Why did I have to burn all the food?" _I thought, but I kept my expression open and polite, hoping that there was some way of escaping a scene. Leah walked past Bella as if she was invisible, but the sneer on Leah's face clearly showed that she's noticed her. She stopped and stood in front of me with what I recognised as her flirty smile plastered across her face. _"Shit. Here we go." _I thought.

"Well hello, you." She simpered at me. "Don't you look great? I haven't seen you in here for breakfast on a weekend in forever. I guess you just remembered I would be here and wanted to catch up a little, huh?" As uncomfortable as I felt, I tried to keep my expression neutral, not wanting to antagonise Leah, but refusing to insult Bella by acknowledging Leah's smile and blatant flirting. Bella remained calm and cool beside me, though there was no way she had missed the deliberate snub and subsequent gushing at me. I was impressed at her coolness – if the situation had been reversed I wasn't sure I could've kept it together. _"Shit, does that mean she's not all that interested in me apart from the sex?"_ I panicked for a moment, before realising how ridiculous I was being. _"I'm such a dick. In the first place, it's not _meant _to be an emotionally based relationship. In the second place, Bella's just not the sort to cause a scene, and finally, when the fuck did I turn into a fifteen year old girl?" _

"Oh, erm….. Hi, Leah. Erm. Yeah, it's nice to see you and everything but we just came in for breakfast really, that's all." I said to Leah, and the smile on her face faltered for a split second, before coming back in full force.

"Well what do you fancy this morning then, Sammy?" she asked in a weird breathy voice that really didn't suit her at all. I'd always hated it when she'd call me Sammy, and had told her so several times, but she'd always ignored me, saying it was cute. Her using that name actually helped me get my balance and when she added "See anything you like?" I simply raised a surprised eyebrow. Unfortunately it didn't dissuade her in the slightest and the discomfort festival continued. She playfully flicked the menu card. "On the menu of course, silly" she simpered.

I was glad to feel Bella's hand gently squeezing my knee, offering silent support and making it clear she wasn't pissed at me over the impending scene. Her touch helped a lot and I straightened in my seat, squaring my shoulders.

"Bella and I would both like a cup of coffee to start us off, thanks Leah." I said carefully and politely, not wanting to hurt her, but also not willing to allow her to dismiss Bella completely. "Then she'll have…" I trailed off, looking at Bella, inviting her to make her order.

"A stack of blueberry pancakes and a side of bacon, extra crispy please, Leah" She asked politely, and either missing or deliberately ignoring Leah's tense, clenched jaw as a she wrote down Bella's order.

"And I'll take the same, only a double order of both for me, and an extra side of sausage, also double, thanks." I added in an equally polite voice. Leah pressed so hard with her pencil as she wrote that her hands shook a little and I felt any hope I had allowed to grow wither and die. She was definitely going to create a scene. Leah went to grab a coffee pot and as she came back, her hands were still shaking. In anger, I guessed and I briefly felt a little sorry for her; she can't have expected to have to deal with this when she went into work that morning. My sympathy disappeared a second later as she poured boiling hot coffee all over Bella's hand in the most obviously fake accident I'd ever seen. Bella leapt up with a pained yelp and cradled her hand to her chest protectively.

"Ow owowowowowow." She whimpered, blowing on her hand. Looking around for some water or ice, I spotted a pitcher of chilled orange juice on the counter and I quickly jumped up and grabbed it, then turned and gently but firmly took hold of Bella's wrist, plunging her injured hand into the ice cold liquid.

"Shh. Shh. It's ok, you're ok." I soothed her, pulling her into my arms a little awkwardly due to the attached pitcher. "Keep your hand in there for a few minutes while I sort you something better." I went to pull away so I could get her a bowl or pitcher of ice water, but Bella whimpered so piteously again and grasped at the back of my shorts, that I couldn't move away from her. I bent and pressed a kiss to the top of her head before turning, trembling as I fought the need to phase right there in the diner to glare angrily at a pale faced Leah.

"I don't believe for a second that you did that by accident, Leah, but we can deal with that in a few minutes. Right now you're going to get a pitcher of ice water for Bella to put her hand in, and you're going to do it so fast that I barely see you move. You understand me?" I growled at her and she began to tremble herself. She'd never been afraid of me before – I'd never given her any reason to be. But she certainly seemed to have a healthy fear of me at that moment. _"Good." _I thought. I knew I'd never lay a finger on her, I was brought up knowing how unacceptable that was, but I wouldn't hesitated to have a really good yell at her as soon as I had Bella's hand tended to. Dramatic scene be damned. Despite being afraid, Leah still had a bit of fight left in her and I was thankful when, just as she opened her mouth to say something that was bound to make me even madder, someone jumped up from their table with a pitcher of ice water and copied my firm but gentle wrist grab and hand plunge manoeuvre, settling Bella's hand into the cooler liquid. I turned away from Leah to see who had helped and was stunned to see my mom standing there.

"Thanks Mom." I said, my voice a little shaky with emotion, and Bella's head whipped around and up to look me in the face. She looked as stunned as I felt, but she stood there quietly taking in my expression, which I sure was shaken but hopeful – that's how I was feeling.

"Thank you so much, erm Mrs Uley" Bella said in a grateful voice, her smile tight and pained. "It feels much less painful in the water." Mom nodded slightly.

"It's Alison, Sweetie, Mrs Uley is the battle axe of an ex-mother in law." She gave a wry little smile which Bella returned, and I just soaked in the memory of having heard her say the same thing many times before. "Sam Honey, you get yours and Bella's breakfasts to go, and I'll take Bella outside for some fresh air and a bit of space away from gawking eyes." She said the last two words a little louder and with pointed emphasis and while I was glad that my mom hadn't changed much if she was still giving the local gossips as much grief as possible at every opportunity, I did wish a little that she'd not reminded Bella of all the people staring at her. She hated being the centre of attention. Sure enough, as Bella realised that all eyes were on us, she blushed bright red and cast her eyes down to the floor.

Mom began to lead Bella outside, having to tug quite firmly on her arm to get her to release her hold on me. I didn't for a second believe that Mom would manage to restrain herself from speaking her piece to Leah though, so I wasn't at all surprised when just before they reached the door, she turned and fixed a still trembling, furious looking Leah with a piercing glare.

"As for you, Leah Clearwater." She ground out with that eerily calm, voice, which when I was a child and had done something wrong, had filled me with dread, "I have loved you like a daughter, backed you whenever you needed it, stood up for you and what I believed to be your rights, even to the detriment of my own son and my relationship with him. And here, now, I am finally shown just what I've been standing up for….. A vicious, spiteful, vindictive, spoilt little bitch, who would deliberately injure someone simply because they have what you want but can't have. I'm ashamed of you. I'm ashamed of myself for being so stupid as to destroy the wonderful close relationship with my only child over someone like you. It seems he did know better than me the whole time." Mom didn't give Leah a chance to respond, she simply raised her chin and turned back to the door, pulling Bella along with her, Bella's chin dragging across the floor as she walked. I knew how Bella felt. I was completely floored by Mom's stirring rant at Leah, and I knew that it was also her way of announcing to all the gossips listening in that her loyalty now lay with me once again. Bella truly was amazing. Somehow she had managed to be the catalyst that brought my mom and I back together, and I would never be able to repay her for that. I stood there, staring at Mom in disbelief for a moment and then shook off the hock and turned to give Leah a piece of my mind.

"So just what the _fuck _do you think you're playing at, Leah?" I began in a growling voice, all set to give her a blistering set down. As I looked across at her though, I began to realise something. Something impossible. Something dreadful. Something that needed to be gotten out of there as fast as fucking possible.

Leah was about twenty seconds away from phasing, and would be doing it right there and then if I didn't get her calmed down. Striding over to her, I grasped her elbow firmly and speaking in a loud voice for the benefit of the still gawping customers I said

"I think we'll talk about this privately, shall we?" Leah's shaking intensified as I tugged her along the corridor that led to the back door, Mrs Redfern the manager shaking her finger at Leah as we strode by and saying something about poor customer service and the docking of wages, and I'd barely gotten her outside before she exploded into a light grey wolf. I stepped forward, catching her eye as she spun around, tripping and yelping much as we all did on our first phase, and speaking in as calm a voice as I could muster, I said.

"Leah, don't panic. I know it's weird and terrifying, but you're not going mad, you really are a wolf and if you listen you'll be able to hear Paul Lahote and Jared Cameron trying to talk to you inside your mind." Leah stopped her yelping and turned to look at me with a furious gaze, snarling, growling and spitting as she tried to speak human words through her wolf mouth.

"I can't understand you when I'm in human form and you're phased, Leah. I'd have to phase too to hear you and I can't do that – my mom and Bella are right around the corner for one, ad for two, you need to be calm, not angry to make the phase back, and my presence in your head is not going to help you get to that point." I took a deep breath, trying to keep my voice calm and even which was proving quite the task as Leah still hadn't let up on her snarling and snapping at me, refusing to accept that she couldn't speak in her wolf form. "You've got Paul and Jared right there to help you, Run through the back alleys and get into the forest, then run back til you get to your place. One of the guys will join you on the way, and your dad know all about this and will be able to help. Oh, and whatever you do, don't let anyone else see you." I stepped back a little, pointing out to her the way to go, and after a few more minutes of trying to yell at me with her wolf mouth, she finally gave in and, throwing one last hateful look at me, she ran off, surprisingly fast, through the alley towards the woods. With a huge sigh of relief, I leant against the wall for a moment, trying to regain my composure. _"What the fuck? Women don't phase. It's _always _just the men. Shit. This is going to be a fucking nightmare." _I scrubbed my hand across my face in frustration then quickly stepped back in through the back door of the diner to hunt out Mrs Redfern and cover for Leah.

After a brief chat with Mrs Redfern, I managed to convince her that it had been her own idea to send Leah home, and with the meals we'd ordered handed over, on the house, and a couple of cups of orange juice thrown in too for good measure, I quickly strode out of the front of the diner just as my cell beeped with a text. It was from Jared, who, obviously, had phased back to text me that the shit had just hit the fan at the Clearwater's and that I needed to get my ass over there. I texted back a quick "Hell, fuck no. I'll just make it worse – she's angrier with me than with anyone else, and right now I have to deal with the person that Leah injured." And rushed over to Bella and my mom who were sitting on a bench outside. As I approached I just caught the tail end of what my mom was saying to Bella.

"….You're a good girl, a strong woman, and just what my Sam needs." I heard her say and I realised that she was actually right, Bella _was _exactly what I needed. It hit me then that I'd done exactly what I'd told myself not to do – I'd fallen for her. It had happened so fast and so naturally that I'd not realised the danger I was in and now it was too late. I would eventually have to deal with the backlash which would come with either my imprinting, or her leaving. Either that or I'd have to break things off with her immediately. My wolf snarled in fury at that idea, and I couldn't help but agree with him. It was something I was going to have to give a lot of thought to, but just then wasn't the right moment. Bella was hurt and I needed to help her if I could. I crouched down next to her and peered at her hand through the glass of the pitcher. It was a very angry red colour and I could see a few places where it was bound to blister.

"Bella, are you ok? How's it feeling, Baby? Should I take you to the clinic?" Mom smirked at Bella after I spoke and I realised I'd slipped and called her "Baby" without thinking. Proof if proof were needed of the leap my feelings for her had taken. My mom had obviously been stirring the relationship pot herself, if I knew her at all, and that must've been why she was giving Bella the old 'I told you so' look.

Bella reached out her good hand and cupped my cheek gently.

"Sam Honey, I'm ok." She told me quietly, and I felt my chest warm as I hear the endearment coming from her. I wondered if she'd even noticed she'd said it. _"Probably not. She's distracted and under stress. It was probably just a slip." _I rationalised.

"See?" She went on. "It's already less red and angry looking. Another little while in its fish-tank and my lobster hand will be good as new." Both Mom and I burst out laughing at her turn of phrase, and as our laughter blended together I realised how much I'd missed hearing Mom laugh. My cell phone beeped just then, announcing a reply to my text. I glanced down at it.

"Seriously, Boss. We need you here. Now. Like yesterday even. Jared."

"Oh for fuck's sake. Why can't they handle it themselves? They know I'm busy." I grumbled under my breath. I looked up at Bella and Mom with a guilty, pleading expression. "Bella, Mom, I'm really sorry, but Jared and Paul are insisting there's something only I can deal with, and they're not taking 'hell, fuck no' for an answer. I'm going to have to go handle it and I don't know how long it's going to take." Mom reached out almost gingerly towards me, almost as if she expected me to flinch away from her, and then she squeezed my shoulder like she used to do to give me a little confidence boost.

"It's ok, Son." She said proudly, "I know you work hard with that contracting business of yours, and if there's some emergency on one of your site, then you should go deal with it." I felt like crap letting her believe the lie, but I had no choice. I was grateful and relieved though, that she'd look after Bella for me, and proud that the two of them clearly saw the good in each other and were enjoying each other's company. Mom continued. "I'll take Bella back to my house and take a proper look at the lobster hand." Both Mom and I snorted in synch with amusement. "And we can visit together until I have to head to work." She looked at Bella for confirmation and much as everyone else did when faced with the full force of my mom's charm offensive, Bella gave in and nodded in agreement. "Oh, what happened with Leah by the way?" Mom asked as she and I both helped Bella and her 'lobster hand and fish tank' as she'd called them up to her feet. I worded my reply very carefully. Not saying a single untrue word, but shaping the truth with precision.

"I gave her a piece of my mind over her behaviour, Mrs Redfern, today's duty manager did the same, and seeing as Leah was so angry at being yelled at, I told her she should go home and work off her tantrum. Mrs Redfern agreed, and Leah went storming out the back." I shrugged. Bella pulled me closer to her with her good hand and raised up on her tip-toes to give me a quick kiss. I got the impression she felt too awkward in front of my mom to do more than that. Mom snorted and pointedly turned to stare at the sea, chuckling under her breath.

"I'll talk to you later?" Bella asked me.

"Sure sure." I said, feeling a little uncomfortable myself, knowing there was no way that Mom wasn't listening in. "Hopefully this won't take me too long to sort out, and I'll call when I get back." I gave her one last kiss and turned to my mom. Handing her the keys to my truck I said. "Here, Mom. I'll catch a ride with Jared. You drive Bella and I'll fetch the truck from yours later. We can have a proper talk then." I hesitated, a little unsure. "I mean, if that's ok with you?" Mom's eyes welled up.

"Of course it's ok, Honey. I'm so sorry. About everything. We'll sit down and talk when you're back." She sniffed a little and gave me a wobbly smile. "I love you, you know that, right, Sam?"

"I know, Mom." I replied, a tiny tremor in my voice. I'd waited and hoped for so long for us to be reconciled and it had taken Bella to make it happen. I didn't care how childish it might've sounded. I'd missed my mom. "I love you too." I told her and I wrapped her up in my arms and gave her a gentle squeeze. Setting her down I gave them both a little wave and strode off down the beach to deal with whatever shit storm was going on at the Clearwater's house.

As it turned out, it wasn't one shit storm but two, one a fair bit shittier and stormier than the other. I'd phased as soon as I'd reached the tree line next to the beach, and was instantly aware of Jared's strung out, desperate relief as he felt me phase in. He gave me a flash of memory so I could get up to speed as fast as possible. Leah had, somewhat to my surprise, actually done as I'd told her and run for home through the forest, but I'd cocked up; I'd forgotten that Harry was out fishing with Billy and Charlie, and so wouldn't be home to help her. I'd also failed to tell her to wait outside her house, and the idiot had barged in through the back door, looking for her dad and had instead encountered Sue and Seth sitting at the kitchen table with their breakfasts. Seth had promptly phased himself in response to the danger, and the only thing that'd kept Sue from being ripped to shreds in the process of his phase was that she'd had the sense to drop to the floor and hide under the table when Leah had burst in. It was a total fucking disaster. Wedged into the Clearwater's kitchen were two newly phased wolves, neither able to move enough to get to a door, and I arrived just as Sue had crawled between their paws to get out of the kitchen herself. Jared was in wolf form outside the backdoor, away from prying eyes and using every ounce of his will to keep the two new wolves calm and still while Sue crawled free and Paul was patrolling around Billy, Harry and Charlie, his hysterical laughter echoing through the pack mind as each new image from Jared, and now me, sparked off a new wave of inane giggles. My first task was to get Paul to shut the fuck up. Every wave of laughter from him was driving Leah's temper higher and higher, and if he didn't quit it soon, we'd have a half destroyed house and a pair of injured wolves on our hands. Paws. Whatever.

_"Paul, are you going to shut the fuck up, or are you going to make me give you two Alpha orders in one day?" _I snapped at him, and was gratified to find that my tone had been harsh enough to actually make him clam up without the order. I really didn't like using the Alpha orders and avoided it when I could. "_Ok. Now dare I hope you had the sense to phase and tell Harry and the others what was going on?" _Paul snorted and replied.

_"Yes, Boss." I phased and told them as soon as I felt her phase in. They're on the way back and I'm running patrol loops around the car every few miles and just trailing them the rest of the time." _I was relieved – it seemed he _could _be sensible and responsible when it counted.

_"Let us know when you're about ten minutes away, would you?" _I asked him and with a simple

_"Will do"_ He closed himself off a little, leaving us in peace from his giggling.

Paul's sudden silence made everyone else relax a fraction, and I turned my attention to the two newbies. They were both still struggling and squirming against each other and in doing so were steadily tearing Sue's kitchen to pieces. Sizing up the situation, I found the solution.

_"Jared. Phase out and call Jake and Embry. Get them over here ASAFP."_

_"Ok, Boss. I'm sorry this turned into such a giant fuck up." _Jared answered, sounding completely frazzled. He might be the current Beta of the pack, but as we all knew that if Jake stepped up, I'd end up as the Beta, and if Jake refused to step up, Jake would be the Beta, Jared found it hard to exert his authority, especially over Paul as they were such close friends. It was an issue I'd have to tackle, but right at that moment I had much bigger issues to handle.

"_Ok, Jared." _I reassured. _"I know you did your best. You phase out now, and once you've gotten through to Jake, phase right back in. I think you'd be the best at handling Seth, he's a lot like you. As soon as I've gotten them both out of the kitchen, you and Seth take a run over to my place. Ok?"_ Jared gave me a mental nod and promptly phased back to human form, leaving me to handle the disaster area that was the Clearwater's kitchen. Leah's snarling and snapping at her brother was getting seriously old. Ok so she was scared and angry and frustrated and probably embarrassed, but so was Seth, and he was handling the whole situation a hell of a lot better than his _older _sister. I listened to Leah's mental bitching for another moment and considered the best method of handling her. I strongly suspected that most of her behaviour right then was coming from her embarrassment. When embarrassed, Leah had the tendency to react with indignant anger, lashing out at those around her to ease her own humiliation. I realised suddenly why I enjoyed Bella's reaction to embarrassment so much. Her dignity, honesty and humour every time she was embarrassed was such a refreshing change. I quickly clamped a lid down over that thought. Thinking even Bella's name right then would've been a very bad idea bearing in mind Leah's feelings on the matter. Finally sick of Leah's bitching, I attempted to put a stop to it.

_"Leah. You need to calm down. Neither of you is going to get out of there until you do, and there's no way in hell that you'll be able to phase back into your human form until you're completely calm either, so it's time to shut the fuck up and chill the fuck out. Even Seth is calmer than you and he's much younger and probably more scared." _On a normal day, that would've gained me Leah's compliance, albeit a scowling, glaring compliance that threatened retribution. Hearing that Seth was afraid would've normally done the trick; she wasn't a bad person, only bitter and angry, and she loved her brother very much. But this time I wasn't getting through. She barely slowed in her snarling and snapping and wriggling at all and I made one last attempt at reasoning with her before having to issue an order – both of us would hate it if I did. _"Last chance, Leah. If you don't still yourself and shut yourself up, I'll have to do both for you and I hate having to give orders just as much as I'm sure you'll hate having to obey them." _Leah went into an absolute frenzy of movement, crashing Seth into the wall and making his ribs creak. She was so far gone in her temper tantrum that she didn't even notice she was hurting him.

_"Order me? Order? Me? Just who the fuck do you think you are, Samuel Uley? If you think I'd ever even _think _of obeying any order from you, you're completely deluded! I don't know what you did to make this happen to me, but you'd better fucking undo it right the fuck now because if you don't I'm going to break out of this kitchen and rip out your fucking throat, you condescending, arrogant, back-stabbing CUN…." _

**_"Be quiet right this second, Leah!" _**I ordered and with a bewildered yelp, her tirade cut off mid-word. Both Seth and I breathed sigh of relief, and from deep in the forest on his patrol route Paul chipped in.

_"Thank you, Boss. If I'd had to listen to another second of that self-centred 'woe is me' shit, I would've had to abandon my patrol, run over there and hit her in the head with a hammer to shut her up for a bit." _I managed to restrain my amusement at this, but Seth didn't even try; he burst into a round of our choking, barking laughter and replied to Paul.

_"Well if you ever need it, there's a pretty big hammer in the shed." _Paul burst out laughing himself and even I couldn't keep a little snort from escaping me.

"_Thanks, dude. It's noted." _Paul replied and then went back to concentrating on his patrol run. Leah wasn't at all impressed by her brother's amusement and as she'd not for a second let up on her frantic wriggling and twisting as she attempted to get out, she deliberately gave a particularly big shove to Seth, banging him once again against the wall and probably at least bruising his ribs. At his yelp of pain, Leah at least had the grace to look a little ashamed, but as she met my eyes through the kitchen window her embarrassment once again made her react with anger and she jerked her muzzle up sharply and went back to twisting about in search of freedom. Enough was enough.

**_"Stop moving, Leah. NOW!" _**I ordered her again and with a bewildered expression on her face, Leah suddenly found herself unable to move so much as a muscle. _"I was going to do this the other way round, as I know Seth wouldn't give a shit _how _you both got out of there, as long as you both did. But after that little display of viciousness, hurting your brother just cos he had the nerve to laugh at your ridiculous behaviour, we're going to do it this way instead." _Her eyes snapped over to look at me through the window in confusion and maybe if she hadn't injured both Bella and Seth right on front of me in only the space of an hour I might not have enjoyed it so much, but as it was I didn't even try to keep the wolfy grin off my face or the amusement out of my mind as I fixed Leah's gaze and issued another order.

**_"Leah, lie down."_** I could feel the indignation pouring off her and the amusement pouring off Paul, Seth, and off Jared who had just phased back, as without a second's hesitation, her body obeyed the order and she dropped to her belly on the kitchen floor. Suddenly able to move a little, Seth took a few deep breaths and looked out of the window to grin at Jared and I. From the kitchen door, Sue clapped her hands.

"Brilliant, Sam. Well done." she said. "Now why didn't any of us think of that?" she was handling the situation very well for someone who suddenly had a pair of horse-sized wolves for children, but then she'd known Seth would likely phase ever since he began his growth spurt a month or so before, so at least she'd had that little bit of warning.

_"Right. Now Seth, you clamber over Leah and walk out of your poor mom's kitchen." _He did just that, slipping a few times as his lack of control over his new form made him stand right on various parts of his sister who still lay, unable to move, on the kitchen floor. As he passed by his mom, Seth paused and pressed his cold, wet nose to her cheek, earning himself a shocked indignant squeal and a light, playful slap to the shoulder.

"Quit that, Seth." Sue said. "Now you go on out there and do whatever Sam says. I'll see you back here in a while. He lolled his tongue out in a wolfy grin and padded outside where Jared and I were waiting.

_"Well done, Seth." _I told him. _"You're handing all this remarkably well. Now you and Jared head off to my place and once you've managed to phase back, you can use a pair of my cut-offs that I keep in a box under the back steps for emergencies."_

_"Ok, Boss." _He replied, falling instantly in with the annoying habit that Paul had started and which I'd given up complaining about as it did me no good. _"I know she's being a royal pain in the ass about all this, but please don't go too hard on Leah. She's completely freaked out." _He added, looking back over his shoulder towards the house where his sister was still lying on the kitchen floor.

_"I know, Seth. We all were when we first phased. Especially me, as I had no-one around to tell me that I wasn't going completely insane. But none of the rest of us took it out on the others or deliberately hurt someone else like she just did, so there's only so much sympathy I can muster right now." _I gave him a quick flash of the memory of Leah hurting Bella just before she phased. _"She also did that today, just before her phasing, so you can see why I'm struggling to muster up any sort of good feeling for her right now." _Seth gave a little whine as he saw the damage his sister had done.

_"I didn't know about that, Sam. I'm sorry she did it." _He apologised sincerely. I felt bad for making him feel bad.

_"I know. And I'm sure that Leah's sorry too, somewhere inside all that anger. She's never been a bad person, or the sort to deliberately hurt others. I'm sure that part of it was down to the anger most of us get all snarled up with just before we phase." _I was reminding myself as much as saying it for Seth's benefit. Leah probably hadn't been in control of herself when she burnt Bella, and I needed to keep that in the front of my mind when dealing with her. I was also saying it for Leah's benefit. She might not be able to say or think anything at us right at that moment, but she could certainly hear us, and being able to see the result of her actions against Bella, as well as hear that I understood she wasn't _completely _responsible for her action, would hopefully help her to see how unreasonable she was being without getting all defensive as she was prone to being when she knew she was in the wrong.

As Jared and Seth ran off to my house, Jake and Embry emerged from the trees behind us. Having phased in time to see the image I showed Seth of Bella's hand, neither were very impressed with Leah, but both had the good sense to keep their annoyance and anger to themselves.

_"Leah. In a minute I'm going to lift both orders so you can talk to us and you can get up and get out of there. But before I do, there's a few things you need to hear, and as you can't interrupt at the moment, it's probably best if you heat them now." _I could feel a spike of indignation and anger coming from her, but under that was a small thread of curiosity so I had some hope that he'd actually take what I had to say on board. _"Firstly, I should apologise." _Jake and Embry snapped their heads towards me in shock, wondering what on earth I was saying. _"I should've come with you when you phased, rather than sending you here to find Paul and Jared. But I was certain that my presence anywhere near you at a time when you needed to be concentrating on calming yourself so you could phase back would be a real hindrance, rather than a help, and Jared and then Paul have the most experience in all things wolfy after me, so I thought I was acting in your best interests." _I gave a wry snort. "_Clearly that didn't work out so well, so for that I'm sorry." _The anger pouring off Leah began to wane a little and I knew I was on the right track with her. _"I know that Jared and Paul tried to explain what's happening to you, but I don't know how much you took in. So the basic facts are that we are the wolf protectors that we were told about in the old stories. We are here to protect the tribe and our lands, and we have taken upon ourselves also the protection of the town of Forks, against our natural enemies, the cold ones. Yes I know it's hard to believe that vampires exist, but then just look at the situation here. There you are, a wolf nearly six foot at the shoulder, trapped in your mother's kitchen because another wolf is pulling some Jedi mind trick on you. Are vampires really such a stretch of the imagination?" _I could feel her reluctant amusement and I knew I was now winning. _"Now for the tougher stuff. It's a pain in the ass, this life, Leah. I'm not gonna lie to you. But it's also an honour. As much as I often wish that none of us were needed so we could have normal lives, I can't deny that being a protector, having a duty to our tribe, our friends, our families is something to be incredibly proud of. I know that you're angry and afraid, and probably full of hate and indignation and a million other emotions right now, but you need to realise that so were all of the rest of us. Your situation is no worse and actually a little better than some of us had it. I know you heard me tell Seth about my first phase." _At this I allowed her to see a full viewing of my first time as a wolf. I let her feel my terror and anxiety, my loneliness, my desperation, and I let her see just how long I went on like that, completely alone and not understanding what had happened to me. I felt the sorrow and regret for my situation coming from not just Leah, but also from Jake and Embry, and I cut off the memory before I could get too upset myself. _"So you see, it's a little difficult for us to really feel sympathetic when you go off on an hour long rant and rave, ignoring your terrified little brother and mother, and actually injuring your brother in the process, when not one of us, not even Embry, who had never even heard the old stories and must've been convinced he was mental, pulled the shit that you just did." _The sorrow and regret coming from Leah had intensified and a heavy dose of shame was creeping in to join it. It was time to release her from the orders.

**_"Leah, I'm releasing you from your orders now. You can get back up and you can talk with us if you want." _**I told her with the Alpha tone. Then I added in my normal tone. _"How about you come on out here and meet your new brothers? You'll never find a more loyal bunch, even if they can be some of the most annoying beings on the planet when they try." _Three amused snorts, two from beside me and one from inside the house met my joke, and then a light grey wolf came padding out of the house, Sue Clearwater following behind.

_"Ok. So Leah, I'm going to send you off with Embry here – he's the calmest and most sensible of the bunch and was the quickest to phase back into human form, so he's probably the best one to pair you with for now. There's a little clearing out in the forest that's quiet and peaceful and private, so that's probably a good place, as long as you don't mind walking back in human form?"_ Both Embry and Leah shook their heads, no, so I quickly flashed an image of the location to them. Then added. _"Oh. Before you go. Leah, you see that Embry, Jake and I all have our cut-offs tied around a leg?" _I asked, bending and touching my nose to the cord tied around my own leg, where my cut-offs were secured. She nodded. _"Well I'm sorry to say that we don't do it as a fashion statement. When you phase back you'll be naked – don't worry, Embry won't look. So if you've got a light dress you can slip on and off easily in an emergency, that's easy to fold down and tie to your leg, we should have your mom grab it quickly for you."_ Leah looked over at Sue, back to the cord on my leg, and the back at Sue again with a hopeful expression and Sue smiled.

"That yellow tea dress?" she asked and Leah nodded in relief. "I'll go grab it for you." Sue said and quickly darted off.

Once Leah's dress was firmly tied to her leg, she and Embry ran off towards the clearing I'd mentioned, leaving Jake and I alone with Sue.

"Jake I need you to go take over Jared's patrol. I know you've not long finished your own shift, but we've got to have someone doing it, and it looks like I' going to be stuck here doing repairs to the Clearwater's kitchen for a few hours." I scowled at the house.

_"Sure, sure, Boss. I'll head out now. Happy hammering!" _He added the last with a cheeky yelp and ran off before I could respond. Shaking my head, I walked off to phase behind a bush and then wandered in to the house to survey the damage. It was going to take several hours and I let out a large sigh, echoed by Sue.

"I'm sorry about how this all played out, Sue." I told her. I should've phased and come with her. I just thought my presence would make matters worse. She patted my arm soothingly. Its ok, Sam. You can't be everywhere all the time and the best of us makes the odd wrong call. Just chalk it up to experience and move past it." I smiled at her matter-of fact tone and grabbed a note pad from the kitchen counter.

"Well ok then, Sue. And the first thing to do is to make a note of what I need to pick up from the hardware store to get this all patched up."


	33. Chapter 32: Tracking and Talking

**And finally, the last giant part of my huge great massive Sam POV, which was originally supposed to be one single chapter. I'm sure you can all see why I needed to split it. Back to Bella in the next chapter.**

**Thank you all again for your wonderful and very kind reviews. We just passed the 300 mark, which considering I've only been writing the story for a smidge over 2 months is more than I'd hoped for, so thanks for your support. Keep it coming ;0p**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga. I own twitchy fingers that enjoy writing for no profit. **

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Chapter 32: Tracking and Talking

Once we'd cleared away the broken table and other debris, there actually wasn't a huge amount of damage left to repair. A couple of broken cupboard doors, a shattered light fitting and a few of the floor tiles needed replacing. The painting I'd leave to Sue and I was fairly sure she'd have Seth and Leah doing the job once they'd both managed to phase back. After a quick trip to the hardware store for supplies, I made a start on the work, stopping every half hour to head outside and phase so that I could keep on top of progress with our two new wolves. About two hours after I'd started in on Sue's kitchen I got some good news from Jared who was over at my place with Seth. Seth had calmed down fairly easily once he was away from his sister and although the two attempts he'd made to phase back hadn't been successful, Jared was firmly convinced that he'd get it on his next try. The news wasn't quite so positive from Embry and Leah. Although she'd finally managed to get herself calm and quiet enough to make a first attempt, Leah had completely lost her temper when she failed to phase back, and was giving Embry a hard time as he worked at calming her back down. Now that she was over her initial shock, Leah had begun bitching about me and how I'd treated her, from our initial break-up, right up to the events of the day, and Embry had attempted to calm her by explaining why I'd had to leave her, the concept of imprinting, and had even showed her the shared memories we all had of Jared's imprinting on Kim and Paul's imprinting on Rachel. This of course had been a terrible mistake. Had I imprinted myself, or had I still not been dating anyone, his methods might've proved effective, but of course, Leah simply latched on to the fact that I had broken up with her because I hadn't imprinted on her, but was now dating someone else that I hadn't imprinted on. To her mind this was a gross injustice and as Embry didn't fully understand the arrangement Bella and I had, he couldn't explain it her well enough to make her drop it. The other's chiming in every now and then to try to explain things was just pissing her off even more as it seemed to her that it was Bella and the pack against her, and even Paul's pithy anti-Bella comments weren't any help as he was just as pithy towards Leah herself. And Leah and Embry were going around in circles, Leah wanting nothing more than to phase back so she could get away from the pack mind, Embry wanting her to do so too as he had had more than enough of her for one day, but every time Leah got close to calm enough, she'd lose her concentration and end up having a screaming fit over her failure. Both of them were close to their breaking point and I wondered briefly if Leah was _ever _going to manage to phase back. If _Embry _of all people couldn't get her to calm the fuck down, then who could? Sighing in frustration after the latest update, I was just about to phase back when Paul spoke up.

_"We're about ten minutes away from the Clearwater's now, Boss. Harry is bouncing between pride and concern, Charlie is in a foul mood for some reason, especially with Billy, and has been all day, though he won't say why, and Billy is reaching breaking point trying to keep the two of them on an even keel." _He reported in an irritated tone. _"On the plus side, though, no sign of the red-head, so at least we should be vamp free while we try to sort our way through this mountain of shit we've landed in today." _

_"No sign of her on patrol either, Boss." _Jacob added. _"I've got one more loop to run, over behind the Cullen house and then I've covered everywhere." _I thanked the spirits for at least that mercy – having to chase that red-head around would've just about been the icing on the cake.

_"Good job guys." _I told them. _"Paul, once you get back, could you run over to my place and help Jared out? And Jake, I'm sorry to do this to you, but could you go spell Embry for a while after your last loop? I'll take the next patrol, but I'd be the worst possible person to try to help Leah, Paul coming in a close second." _Jake sighed.

_"Well ok, Boss. But if you end up with a three legged newbie, then I reserve the right to say I told you so." _I snorted. I couldn't blame him for not wanting to go help Leah. As Bella' best friend he was livid about what Leah had done to her, and the intermittent anti-Bella rants she'd been spouting off the last couple of hours hadn't warmed him to her in the slightest. I spoke to the whole pack, feeling a little uncomfortable with the suddenly large numbers – less than a week ago, it'd just been the four of us, yet here we now were, a booming pack of seven.

_"Look everyone. I know it's been a hell of a day, and that some of you have pulled double duty. I know that our nerves are strung tight and we're all just a few hairs from ripping into each other. But we can get through it if we back each other up. That's why we're all able to get into each other's heads like we do. So that we can understand each other and offer support where and when it's needed. So we all need to suck it up, quit sniping at each other and try our hardest to work through any issues. If we don't then a difficult lifestyle is going to rapidly become an impossible one and on top of that we'll start slipping in our duties to our tribe. If we're not functioning as a pack, we won't be able to protect ourselves, let alone anyone else." _There was quiet as everyone digested what I'd said, and I could the feel determination coming from each of the others as they all set themselves to their tasks with a new sense of purpose. I phased back and pulled on my cut-offs. _"I almost wish the red-headed bitch _did _show up this evening." _I thought to myself as I walked back to the house. _"At least we'd have something to work our frustrations out on." _ I was broken out of my thoughts just then as I heard Harry's truck coming down the road.

"Sue, Harry's back." I called out and I finished screwing in the light fitting, the last job on the list. We both went outside to meet the three men and I could see why Paul had sounded so irritated with the three of them. Harry was almost bouncing in his seat as he drove along, anxiety written across his features. Charlie was scowling out of the window, radiating a black mood that I could almost feel the edges of outside the truck, and billy was sat between the two of them, a look of resigned annoyance on his face. They'd obviously not had the best day, and I wondered what was eating Charlie.

Once they'd pulled up outside, Harry all but fell out of the truck in his urgency to hear all about what had happened. I filled him in as best I could, avoiding for the moment any mention of what Leah had done to Bella. There was no point on putting a match to the tinder keg that was the mood between the three men. Everyone now in the know about the day's events, I turned to Harry.

"Did you want me to drive Billy and Charlie back to Billy's house?" I offered. "I've got to go take over Patrol from Jake in a while, but I can drop your truck back off here in the morning, or one of the guys can." He nodded gratefully.

"Thanks, Sam. That'd be a real help." He said and raising his hand in farewell to his two friends, he walked inside with Sue. I climbed into the truck and looked across at a relieved and grateful Billy and a surly looking Charlie.

"Thanks, Sam. I don't think I could've taken another minute of Harry's anxiety." Billy said with a chuckle. "Don't get me wrong, I know how it feels when your kid phases for the first time, but being trapped in a truck cab with it for two hours is just not fun at all." I gave a chuckle of my own and pulled away, heading down the road to Billy's. When we pulled up at the Blacks' house, Charlie jumped right out and grabbed Billy's chair as usual, and helped his friend into it, but with none of their usual banter and mock sniping. I raised a querying brow at Billy and he shrugged back.

"Your guess is as good as mine at this point, Son." He told me. "He's been like this all day and I'm damned if I can work out what I've done o piss him off. Why don't you see if you can get it out of him?" He suggested, and as Charlie seemed to be waiting for a word with me, I nodded.

"I'll see what I can do" I said, pushing him the last few feet to his front door, and as Rachel opened the door to greet him I gave a little wave and trotted down the steps to talk to Charlie.

"Did Bella really stay at your place last night?" He demanded before I could so much as take a breath. _"What the fuck is all this about?" _I wondered.

"Yes. She came over straight from the drop-in centre and I was with her until I left her at the diner this morning. She was with my mom when I left." I told him and he looked surprised. "Yeah, Bella somehow managed to get my mom and me talking again." I said, again carefully avoiding the exact circumstances. Charlie's face softened a little.

"She does have a way about her." He said affectionately, then his face hardened again. "So she was definitely with you last night?" He confirmed. _"Ok this is officially the weirdest Father/daughter's date conversation ever. Isn't he supposed to _not _want his daughter staying overnight at a guy's house?" _I was completely baffled.

"She was definitely with me last night." I told him firmly.

"Well then at least she didn't do whatever she's planning last night." He muttered angrily. "She won't be doing whatever it is at all if I have anything to say about it." I was at a total loss.

"Charlie?" I said carefully "Is there some kind of problem that I can help with?" He looked up at me, distracted.

"No no. I'll deal with it myself." He said gruffly.

"Well I don't know what Billy did to upset you, but you might want to go talk to him." I suggested gently. "He's as confused as I am, and worried about you, I think." Charlie looked a little guilty.

"I guess I should go have a word with him." He said. "It's not like he's done anything wrong. I was just taking my bad mood out on him cos he was closest." I nodded in understanding and he slapped me on the back. "Thanks for the ride, Son. And for talking a bit of sense into me. You're a good man." I felt a surge of pride at being called 'Son' by this man that I admired so much, and at being called 'a good man'. The pride was soured with an edge of guilt however, as I remembered what this 'good man' had nearly done to his daughter the night before after promising not to take advantage, and I wondered just how 'good' a man he'd think I was if he found out what I _had _done with his daughter just that morning. I gave him a weak smile and waved as he walked up the steps to Billy's door, and then I walked around back to strip and phase.

The pack mind seemed a little more peaceful as I phased in this time, but I could feel the tension behind the façade. Seth had managed to phase back and through Paul's and Jared's eyes I could see he was sitting on my back steps in a pair of my cut-offs drinking one of my beers.

_"Sorry, Boss. But I figured he deserved something in celebration, and it's not like he can get drunk." _Jared reasoned.

_"It's ok, Jared. But just the one. I'm not getting busted for supplying alcohol to a minor, even if it _is _impossible for that minor to get drunk." _We both grinned mentally. _"Once he's done there, have him phase back, and then all three of you head over to the clearing where Leah and Embry are. I've got an idea." _Jared sent a dose of confusion, but I refused to let him in to see my plan. _"Embry? Leah? How's it going over there?" _I asked, already knowing the answer. Leah was still struggling and knowing that her younger brother had managed to phase back before she had was pissing her off to no end.

_"Erm… not _brilliantly_ boss." _Embry answered, sounding fried. _"We keep getting close but not quite there." _He was being very diplomatic, despite the hard time Leah had been giving him.

_"Take a break from it for a bit. Run up to the old treaty line and back a few times or something." _I told them. _"I've had an idea that might actually work. And we'll be at the clearing before long. We'll meet you there." _I turned my attention to Jake next. _"How's it going with you, Jake?" _I asked.

_"Just getting close to the Cullen house." _He answered. _"I'll be round the back of their territory in about ten minutes." _

_"Ok. Finish your loop and then meet us over at the clearing." _I told him. _"I'm just heading there now."_

I'd been running for a few minutes, thinking through my idea as I ran, but without letting any of the others into my head to see it. Tensions were running high and while having the red-headed leech make an appearance just then probably would be the worst thing for us, fragmented as we were, a little sparring might actually help us all work off some aggression and come together as a pack. Suddenly the last thing I'd wanted to hear came bursting through the pack mind.

_"LEECH!" _It was Jake. Through his eyes I could see him closing in on the scent, around the back of the Cullen house. I skidded to a halt, and in the pack mind I saw all the others do the same.

_"Is it the red-head?"_

_"Is it the Cullens?"_

_"Are you sure? Maybe you're confused."_

_"Is it that red-headed bitch?"_

The questions all came on top of each other, a milling mess of sound and feelings.

**_"SILENCE" _**I roared out in the Alpha tone. And everyone went still. **_"No-one is to speak until I say so."_**

_"Jake."_ I said calmly. _"You, and just you can speak. Can you tell if it's the Cullens back again?"_ There was a brief pause as he considered it.

_"I don't think it's them." _He said after a moment._ "I can smell a very faint trace of them from the house and this smells different. Wilder, Stronger somehow." _

_"Ok. That probably means human drinker." _I told him, still holding my calm. _"Paul. You head towards Jake and sniff it out. See if it's the red-head. Jared. You take Seth and meet up with Embry and Leah wherever they are. Embry and Leah. Stay still and wait for Jared and Seth to join you. You can speak if you need to, but no fucking about, only business calls, ok?" _I waited for everyone to voice their agreement, and then started running towards the Cullen house myself. If two noses were better than one, then three were better than two.

As I approached Jakes position, Paul closed in on one side and we ran on together, pressing forward as fast as we could. Jake was pacing up and down behind the house, nervously waiting for us to arrive and as we ran up I could feel the relief pouring off him.

_"The trail's strongest over there." _He said, pointing with his muzzle, and we all walked over to the spot. We could smell it immediately. Definitely not a Cullen and definitely not the red-head.

_"A new one on me." _Paul said and looked up at me. _"How about you, Boss? Smelled it before?" _Had I not been thinking about my first phase earlier that day, I might not have recognised it, but the scent tickled at a memory and as I focused on it I realised I _had _smelled it before. During my time alone in the forest after I first phased, I'd picked up this scent along with a couple of others, faint and nearly washed out, but definitely this scent. As I thought about it, I suddenly realised that one of the other scents had been that red-headed bitch. I couldn't believe I'd missed it before. If she, this other leech I was smelling now, and another had been in the area when I phased, maybe I'd been wrong to blame just the Cullens for my change. I didn't have the time to muse on that right then though. I lifted my nose from the ground and looked up at Paul and Jake, who were looking at me expectantly.

_"I've scented this one before." _I told them. _"A long time ago – when I first phased. This scent was with the red-head's and one other."_

_"If the owner of this scent was with the red-head, then whoever it is is fair game." _Paul said and I had to agree.

_"Then let's track them down." _I said and Jake bounced on his paws in nervous excitement. _"Calmly, Jake. We mustn't make a mistake. We need to follow the scent's strongest direction and find the leech that left it." _Jake nodded and the three of us set to following the scent along the ground. The leech, whoever it was, had approached the house from the back, which was why Jake had caught the trail. That didn't hint at someone who would've been a welcome guest, anyone the Cullens would've been happy to see would've come from the front. It was only good manners. The scent circled the house a few times and had then headed off up the drive and the three of us followed as quickly as we could without losing the trail. Down the road a little way, the scent veered off down a little track, a fresh set of tyre marks showing that it had been in use in the last few hours. At the end of the track, Jake and I stopped cold.

_"OH FUCK!" _we both said in synch and started forward again at a faster pace.

_"Does that truck belong to who I think it belongs to?" _Paul asked, carefully not riling either of us up in our current mood.

_"Well that depends." _Jake snapped back. _"If you think it belongs to a certain brunette with tendencies toward the clumsy, then yes. It does." _Paul wisely kept quiet, although I could feel a slight hint of irritation coming off him. I didn't waste my time asking him what his problem was. The leech scent was now following a slightly older Bella-trail, step for step, never wavering off course, and we sped up ourselves, finding it easier now there were two scents to follow, but Jake and I were getting more and more anxious by the minute.

After a few more tense minutes, Jake spoke up.

_"Boss, Is it just me, or is this trail heading almost straight towards the clearing you had Embry and Leah at earlier? _He was right. About three miles ahead lay a small clearing in the forest. The same clearing I'd had Embry and Leah at.

_"He's right everyone. Jared, Embry. Lead Leah and Seth back towards the clearing. Bella will probably be there. Station yourselves under cover behind her position, split up a little, but not by more than twenty paces between each of you. Embry right behind her, Jared left flank, Leah and Seth right flank. Stay out of sight, keep silent and as there's no breeze tonight, hopefully you'll not be scented. Move." _I told them, and was glad when they did so without comment, although I could feel both Leah and Paul's irritation at the orders. This time Paul did speak.

_"Have you thought what we'll do if it's one of the leech lover's little friends?" _he snarked_. "I know it's not a Cullen, but maybe she's got other bloodsucking BFFs we don't know about." _As much as I wanted to tear a chunk out of him, he had a point.

_"So we wait and see if the leech is a threat or not." _I answered, and before Paul could protest, I added. _"If they're not a threat, we escort them out of the area and tell them not to come back. If they _are _a threat." _I growled a little under my breath. _"Then we tear the thing to pieces." _The quiet answering growls to this statement made it clear that Paul and Jake were in agreement, and we pressed forward, careful now to keep our movements silent as we followed the twin trails towards the clearing. We were about a mile out when Jared spoke.

_"Boss. We're in position now. It's a black male leech with dreadlocks. He's chatting with Bella, and she doesn't seem at all fazed, even though he's definitely a human drinker." _Paul swore under his breath.

_"Fucking Leech lover! She's living in a deluded world where all the bloodsuckers are her little friends and everyone skips happily through the meadows. Stupid little bitch!" _ I glared at him, baring my teeth and knew that from the other side of me, Jake was doing the same.

_"Enough, Paul. We all know your opinion of Bella, but now isn't the time to be arguing about it. Just you concentrate on your job. That's all you need to be doing right now." _Thankfully he listened and kept any further comments to himself.

"_Jared. Try to listen in on their conversation if you can without being noticed." _I told him. _"All the time they're just talking, hold your position. But if he makes a move to attack, you guys bring him down, ok?" _

_"Got it, Boss." _Jared replied. _"Wait and see, then jump and rip." _Even in my tense state I had to fight back a grin at Jared's turn of phrase. Jake and Paul didn't bother to hide their amusement, giving mental snorts of laughter. We all fell quiet, trying to listen through Jared's ears to the conversation in the clearing. But it wasn't Jared we found we could hear best. Even though he was much further away, Seth was able to pick out every word of the conversation between Bella and the leech with perfect clarity, while the other three could only pick out one word in five or so.

_"Whoa, check out the sonar on Seth" _Jared said with amazement and I could feel Seth's pride flowing off him. We all trained our minds on Seth's hearing as Paul Jake and I edged forward, much closer to the tree line now, and the others held their positions.

"Oh it wasn't anything in particular, I was just passing through the area and wanted to have a little visit with them, that's all." We heard the leech say through Seth's ears and through Jared's eyes I saw the leech take a step forwards towards Bella. She held her ground, apparently completely unconcerned about his intentions and I wondered if all this stealth and stress had been for nothing, and that this leech was a friend of hers.

"So you talk to them a lot then?" The leech went on and I guessed he was talking about the Cullens. "I hope they're all doing well. What prompted them to move away and leave you behind, Bella?" The leech tilted his head slightly at Bella as she answered. A move I recognised as listening intently. She'd been lying to him I realised. I knew with certainty that she'd not had any contact with the Cullens at all since they left, much less been 'talking to them a lot'. She must know she was on shaky ground with him at the very least.

_"She's faking the confidence." _I said to the pack. _"She knows she's not completely safe with this leech."_

_"You're right." _Jake replied. _"She's doing a fucking good job though. He's not sure he's safe either. If she can convince him the Cullens still check in with her regularly, he might leave Bella alone and then we can pick him off when he's safely out of her sight." _Jake's idea was a good one.

_"Yeah that'd be good. It'll depend on how good a liar she is though. I'm not willing to have her remain in danger any longer than absolutely necessary, so if he works out she's lying, we'll probably have to go in." _I looked over at Jake. _"How good is she at lying?" _I asked.

_"Fucking dreadful, unless she's playing poker." _He answered with a mental grimace. _"To be honest, I'm amazed she's held him off this long. She must be playing a poker hand in her head if she's got him this convinced. Normally she blushes and stammers her ass off when she tries to lie."_ I could feel Paul's reluctant admiration for Bella's cool and confident act, and I didn't blame him. She was doing well with the leech and all I could do was hope that she could keep it up.

She couldn't.

"Oh you know, the usual." We heard her answer in a breezy tone. "People were beginning to take note of the ever youthful Dr Cullen, and whenever that happens, they make a move as soon as they can without raising suspicion." I watched as he leech gave a toothy grin at her answer and the sight of his gross, overly white teeth made her falter a little. It wouldn't have been noticed by a human, but the leech had been listening out for it, and through Seth's ears we heard it too. Her heart sped for a couple of beats before she somehow regulated it again.

_"How the fuck did she do that - Regulate her own heart beat?"_ I wondered through the pack mind, my question echoed by a few of the others, but it was too late. The leech's grin widened even further as he registered the tell-tale sign she was lying and I began to edge forward right to the very edge of the trees and carefully picked my way through the undergrowth around the edge of the clearing, working along to get myself placed right behind the leech who was standing with Bella on the other side of the clearing. Any minute now he'd attack. He knew he was safe. Somehow, Bella managed to hold herself still, maintaining her impressive fake calm.

"Yes I can see how that would be a problem with their lifestyle." The leech answered, edging closer still.

"I thought you were living with the Denali's now?" Bella asked him, maybe not realising that her ploy had failed. "How are you finding the diet? Is it a hard change to make?" The leech grinned again, tilting his head deliberately into the moonlight to show her his eyes which I knew would be blood red.

"Ah well as you can see, the new lifestyle hasn't really taken for me." He said with a careless shrug. "I take a little 'business trip' now and then and I'm afraid that when I'm on these trips I cheat a little on my diet." The whole pack snarled silently through the pack mind at his casual reference to wholesale murder. The leech gave a little chuckle and took another step towards Bella. He was now only about five paces from her. "On this latest trip I ran into an old friend, a mutual acquaintance." He went on. "Victoria. She's really not very happy with you, Bella. She asked me to swing by and see if you were still protected, and I think we both know the answer to that, don't we?"

_"Who the fuck is Victoria?" _I asked, not getting any reply from the pack. _"I hope whoever it is takes the hint when her friend doesn't come back and stays well way from the area." _Mumbles of agreement came from the others. Bella didn't react to old dreadlocks' taunt, so I guessed that whoever this Victoria woman was, she wasn't much of a threat.

"She's going to be quite angry with me I think." The leech went on. "She wanted to kill you herself; she's become quite boring with her petty vengeance, but you really do smell quite delicious and I really am quite thirsty."

_"Ok, strike that. I hope this Vitoria bitch _does _pop by for a visit, so I can rip the bitch apart," _I amended to the smirks of the others_. "But this dreadlocked asshole first!" _The leech licked his lips and began to tense his body, he was just seconds from attacking and so I gave the word.

_"That's it. His time's up. He's going to attack any second." _I told the others and sped up my movement through the edge of the tree line, wanting to centre our attack directly behind him. I was worried though that we were too far away to get to him before he got to her. What we needed was a way to sneak up on him but we had no time. Bella must've noticed him tensing and known what it meant, but amazingly, she _still _held her ground and continued chatting confidently.

"Well I guess I can understand that." She said calmly, which must've confused the fuck out of the leech, I knew that it had confused the fuck out of me. I pressed on, nearly in position.

"But I'm afraid there's something you haven't taken into account." Bella continued, and I wondered what she could be talking about. "Something that Victoria failed to inform you of." The bloodsucker stood a fraction straighter, obviously surprised and curious. Bella was unconsciously giving us a better and better chance to take him out and I just hoped that if she caught sight of us she wouldn't scream or run, or better yet that she wouldn't notice us at all until it was too late for the leech to escape, as he'd certainly notice her noticing us.

"And what could that be, my dear? You're not going to try to convince me that one of the Cullens is around again are you? We both know that's a lie, and something as obvious as that isn't going to protect you." I was finally in position and the few seconds it took Paul and Jake to join me felt like an eternity. Miraculously, Bella was still managing to play the cool and confident card and had given us the time we needed to get into position. I wished we'd have time to sneak up on the bloodsucker at least a little, but that was a wish I knew wouldn't come true. A shifting cloud allowed the moon to shine on Paul's coat for a second and I hoped to hell that Bella hadn't seen it, or she'd accidentally give our position away to the dreadlocked asshole. Even from all the way across the clearing, I could make out Bella's expression. Suddenly a big, beaming smile crossed her face, directed at the leech, no trace of anxiousness in it whatsoever. She really was doing an amazing job at playing her confidence ruse, even though she must've realised by now that it wasn't working any longer.

_"Say what you will, Paul. You have to admit that she's the bravest person you've ever seen." _I told Paul, a hint of the massive pride I felt in my tone. I took the opportunity she'd unknowingly given us though, and began to creep forward silently. The other two flanking me followed my lead and we slunk forward in the shadows, silent death on twelve legs

"No Laurent, I wouldn't insult either of us by trying that lie again. But you know you really should've asked Victoria why she couldn't look in on me herself. It probably would've saved your life." Again I wondered what she was talking about. It was almost as if she knew us wolves were there and were going to protect her, impossible though that was. The leech looked shocked and a tiny thread of doubt edged into his expression. Behind him, we were still edging silently across the clearing, our paws not making a sound in the damp grass of the meadow. We were only a few yards behind him and still stalking closer, so close now that she _must _have spotted us, and yet she gave no hint at all, she was even keeping her heart-rate completely steady, though I couldn't work out how. She continued talking as we closed in.

"See she's been trying to get to me for months, but they've chased her off again and again. She's managed to evade them so far, but I'm sure they'll get her eventually."

_"Holy FUCK! She _does _know about us!" _I almost yelled through the pack mind, exclamations of stunned agreement coming from all around.

_"She probably thinks we're some kind of wild animal." _Leah sneered. I ignored her comment, concentrating on moving silently and felt myself almost shudder as Bella found the nerve to actually lean _closer _to the bloodsucker, making him lean in too to hear her.

"Of course," She said in a stage whisper, "I don't think she was ever stupid enough to let them get this close before making her escape. She may have managed to keep out of their grasp but I'm afraid that you, Laurent…." She gestured over his shoulder towards us. We stopped dead in our tracks and tensed to leap at the leech. "Are fucked"

His head spun around to see what she was gesturing at and his entire body froze for a second.

"No. I don't believe it." He whispered under his breath.

"You should believe it." She told him, a smug little smile on her face. "Like I said, Laurent." Her voice firmed with her final words and I was filled with pride for her courage as she virtually spat them out. "You. Are. Fucked."

The leech suddenly made a break for it, running past Bella so close that his clothes brushed against her as he ran. We were on his tail in an instant, driving him towards the others who were still holding their positions out of sight.

_"Don't break cover yet guys. _I told them firmly. _"Wait until he's almost on top of you so there's no escape." _A few seconds later the bloodsucker hit the treeline_. "NOW!" _I yelled and suddenly, four wolves blurred out of their hiding places, just as planned, trapping the leech in the middle of the pack. He tried to skid to a halt, but Jake and I slammed into him from behind, and Embry grabbed him from his side, and together we dragged him off into the trees, away from Bella. Without having to even think about it, the three of us tore into the bloodsucker, ripping off each limb with relish and leaving his head til last. When he was nothing more than a load of spare parts, wriggling and writhing on the forest floor. We finally stopped, our flanks heaving, and turned to grin at each other.

_"That was fun." _Jake said. _"What shall we do _next _Saturday evening?" _I couldn't help myself ad collapsed with laughter, Embry and Jake joining me.

Over our laughter I could hear Leah begin her sniping again.

_"Oh sure. You boys play in the woods while we all baby-sit for your whore." _I was about to tear into her verbally when Jared shocked the shit out of me.

**_"Leah, Paul. You will both mind your fucking manners. No more growling, no more snarling, and for fuck's sake no more sniping. I'm bored witless of it." _**He'd never tried out his nominal Beta authority like that before, and while I wasn't surprised that the commanding tone didn't take with Paul, I was amazed to find that it worked perfectly on Leah, and was proud that he'd taken a stand as my second in command finally.

_"Nicely done, Jared." _I congratulated him and I padded back out of the trees and into the clearing, Jake and Embry following close behind. The pack grouped together at the side of the clearing and I spoke to them all.

_"Well done everyone. We all worked together as a team." _I fixed Leah and Paul with a stern look. _"And _mostly _without and sniping or fucking about. Now all we have to do is work out what the fuck to do about Bella." _We all stood there trying to come up with a plan. She clearly knew we existed before she saw us, and had probably reasoned somehow that we'd been chasing of vampires, but whilst I didn't appreciate Leah's tone when she said it, her point about Bella not knowing we were human sometimes too was a good one. Maybe the best option was to just slink off and leave her there (with one of us shadowing her home of course, to keep her safe. My thoughts were interrupted by Bella speaking to us. Her voices made us all spin our heads round as one.

"Thank you. Thank you so much. I really can't tell you how grateful I am for your help. I don't know how much you can understand when you're in that form,"

_"Well that closes the question of whether or not she knows that we're human sometimes too." _Jared said matter-of-factly, and several of as flinched, Seth forgetting himself enough to yelp in surprise. "But I really do need to talk to you." Bella continued. "Please, if you can understand me, please can I talk to you? There are things you need to know." We all turned to each other again.

_"I don't know what she can have to say that's important for us to hear, but at least maybe we can work out how much she knows and then decide what to do from there." _Embry suggested and I had to agree that his thought held merit.

_"Fuck that." _Paul snarled. _"That leech loving bitch hasn't got anything to say that I want to hear."_

_"I'm with Paul." _Leah said, to absolutely no-one's surprise_. "Anything she does say is bound to be a lie anyway. We all saw just how good a liar she is, no matter what little Jakey might think." _Before Jake could respond, Paul cut in again.

_"Do me a favour, Leah, and stop being on my side. You're making me look bad." _He said in derision and I had to bite my tongue to hold back my laughter.

_"Both of you shut up, would you?" _Jared snapped at them. _"I've already told you once this evening and I don't want to have to do it again." _Before the sniping could start up again I spoke.

_"__**Ok. Enough. Paul and Leah, You will both stop this bitching at Bella and everyone else." **_The Alpha tone was so strong that both of them dropped to their bellies, Leah looking like she was about to roll onto her back in the ultimate canine sign of submission. I towered over them, my hackles raised in anger. "_I didn't want to have to do that; I _hate _having to do that. But you two _will _keep pushing me too far. Now get up, the pair of you." _I looked over at Jared. _"I'm sorry to do this to you, Jared, but will you please head back to La push and take these three with you." _I looked at Seth. _"You're not in trouble, Seth. You did an amazing job, and we're all in awe of your hearing. It helped us immensely. But I'd be happier if you went with the others back to the Rez. Embry and Jake are Bella's friends, and so they're the best choice to stay, more than three might be a little too intimidating for her." _I told him, and he stood a little straighter, proud of himself. _"Ok then, off you lot go and I'll check in on you when I get back. Jared, can you and Seth please try to help Leah phase back? Paul, for the most part you did a good job this evening, but for your little outburst a moment ago, you just won yourself patrol." _Ignoring his muttered curses I told them all to head out and they did, melting into the tree line in silence. Jake, Embry and I all turned and walked slowly towards Bella, trying not to spook her by moving too fast.

_"You know, this is silly. She's totally not scared of us." _Jake said, and almost as if she'd heard him, Bella sat down cross-legged on the ground, not looking at all worried that we were approaching her. Jake and Embry snorted a little in amusement and I rolled my eyes at them, but we moved a little quicker over to her and at about five yards away from her we sat down and looked at her.

_"So what now?" _Embry asked. _"We all just sit here and stare at each other?"_

_"I had to tell the Elders that we wouldn't tell anyone about us without their approval after Paul imprinted and just blurted the secret to Rachel without checking if it was ok." _I told them both. _"So until we know just how much she does know, or until the Elders give permission, we can't phase back in front of her." _I could feel both of them fill with indignation and honestly I was completely I agreement. But I'd agreed to it with the Council of Elders and I wasn't going to break my word just a couple of days later.

_"So we _do _just sit here and stare at each other then?" _Jake asked. _"Awkward!" _Bella chose that moment to begin speaking

"I'm guessing that means you can understand us regular humans when you're in wolf form then?" She asked, surprising us all. So she definitely did know we had two forms, and didn't seem to find it at all unusual. This girl was very good with weird. With no other way to respond, I gave a slow and exaggerated nod. And she seemed to relax completely.

"Well thank fuck for that, or this would be a really awkward conversation to try." She muttered quietly and all three of us gave amused snorts. She gave a start of surprise.

"Crap. You guys can hear that?" She asked, and all three of us nodded. "Note to self then. No more muttering under my breath." She muttered under her breath making the three of us burst out laughing. Despite her blushing, she joined in the laughter, once again showing me that wonderful attitude she had towards embarrassment. After a moment she settled back down and made a start on whatever it was she felt we needed to hear.

"There's a female vampire, a red-head who's been taking out campers and hikers around here for a few months now." She began, and the three of us stilled and zeroed their attention on her.

_"She knows about the re-head?" _I said, echoed by the other two. _"How the fuck?"_ I was cut off by Bella continuing. "I know what she's after." She told us, and I was amazed that she'd managed to work out for herself that the leech was after Charlie.

_"We're going to have to find some way of telling her we won't let the leech get to Charlie." _I said to the others.

_"If we can't get the message across this evening, we could always leave her a note or something?" _Embry suggested.

_"Shhh. She's still talking." _Jake told us, and we all edged forward a little to show that we were listening. She continued.

"She's after me."

Everything froze for a few seconds.

The three of us were suddenly paralysed by shock and fear for her, not even breathing, until suddenly my anger at Bella being threatened by a _fucking leech_ completely overwhelmed me and I lost my grip on my wolf for the second time that day. I burst into action, a low rumbling growl being torn from my throat, my hackles rising in response to the threat and my wolf took over completely, spinning around, looking for the source of danger, but finding nothing to tear into.  
_"How the fuck dare she threaten her? She's MINE. She's fucking MINE! MINE, MINE, MINE!" _The voice was coming from me, but it was my wolf speaking, not my human side. I was astonished at the level of attachment my wolf had to Bella. I'd know he liked her, and that he was obsessed by her scent, but I'd not realised he considered her as _his. _

_"That fucking bitch, that shit breathed bloodsucker, that undead fucking whore." _My rant continued, both mentally and apparently I was even trying to spit the words out of my wolf mouth too, I had lost it totally. Jake wasn't impressed with my wolf's display and he joined in with his own growl.

_"Yours?" _He snarled. _"What the fuck do you mean, yours? She not fucking property, you asshole. She's a fucking person. And she's not even your imprint, so where the fuck do you get off claiming her as yours?"_

It was completely the wrong thing to say to my wolf, despite the fact that I could see his point. My wolf, still acting without my control snarled back at him and took a swipe with my front paw, Jake returned the action and the whole thing began to deteriorated into a three way brawl; Jake versus my wolf, and my wolf versus me as I struggled to rein him back under my control again. Embry thankfully had the good sense to move and stand in front of Bella so that we wouldn't accidentally hurt her and behind him Bella jumped up to her feet, ready to make a run for it if it looked like the fight was going to make it past her furry grey barrier.

"STOP!" Embry yelled in our heads, and accentuated his yell with a single loud choking bark, trailing off into a menacing growl of his own. In surprise, Jake and I backed off and in the ensuing pause, I finally managed to get control over my wolf and shove it into the background where it belonged. Panting with exertion I spoke to Jake.

_I'm sorry, Jake. My wolf totally got away from me for a moment, and you telling him that Bella wasn't his sent his temper into orbit." _I looked over at him. _"You have to know that none of that little rant was me – I don't think of Bella as a possession, and really neither does my wolf. He's got a bit of a Bella obsession and I didn't realise just how strong it was until just then when he went mental at the thought of someone threatening her." _Jake seemed mollified and said.

_"I didn't know our wolves could take over like that."_

_"Neither did I. I don't know why it happened, but maybe it's an Alpha thing. Being in charge means I have to be that much more dominant, and maybe that means my wolf is closer to the surface than yours." _He gave a mental shrug.

_"That actually makes sense." _He replied and I sighed silently. It seemed the fight was over

"What the fuck was that about?" Bella murmured to herself, a slight tremor in her voice. Our head snapped round and I realised we'd really scared her. I felt like shit.

_"Fuck. The woman's as brave as a lion, standing up to a human drinking vampire, knowing she was in danger and not even breaking a sweat or letting her heart-rate change – did you notice that by the way?" _They both sent me mental nods to confirm they had. _"And after all that, her amazing bravery when she must've know she could die at any moment, and I have to go and fucking terrify her."_

_"Boss. Dude. It wasn't your fault your wolf slipped loose. He took you by surprise." _Embry consoled me. _"If we all act very quiet and docile, I'm sure she'll be fine again in no time. Like you said. She's a fucking brave woman, this one." _He added with pride for his friend. Following his suggestion, moving very slowly so as not to frighten her again I walked closer to her and when I was about three feet away, sank down to lie on my belly, my head now just a little lower than hers. It worked. She relaxed a little and slowly lowered herself back down into her previous seated position. Letting out a huge gusty sigh of relief, Jake and Embry also settled down to the ground and we looked at one another, waiting for her to speak again. The silence dragged out for a while, until finally she spoke.

"Well this is awkward." She said with a shaky laugh, and I let out an amused snort while Jake and Embry gave tongue lolling grins. Bella looked down at her scalded hand in her lap, seeming to be suddenly fascinated by the way the tightened, swollen skin picked up the moonlight. "I don't suppose you guys could change into your human forms for this? It would certainly be much easier to talk if the conversation was going two ways." She asked "I mean I know you're not linked to the Luna cycle like true werewolves, so I'm sure you can go back and forth between forms, but obviously I don't know the way it actually works, if there has to be a danger to make you shift from human to wolf, or if there's a timing issue, like you can only turn back once it's light or something, and then on top of that there might be some tribal law or something that you'd be breaking if you shifted in front to of me and will you listen to me ramble? It's like I've got no filter or control system at all so I'm going to just stop my mouth moving now."

As she finally came to a halt in her little ramble, Jake spoke up.

_"What the fuck? Are we not werewolves? Are there other werewolves that _are_ werewolves? How does she know so much about all this supernatural shit?" _He asked. Embry gave a mental shrug.

_"How the fuck should I know?" _I asked in frustration. _"I only know what the Elders choose to share with us, in their weird need to feel like that have some kind of control. But I can tell you something." _I said, my tone firming. _"That shit is going to stop. I mean it's just not _right _that someone else, not a wolf, or even a member of the tribe, knows more about us than _we _do!" _They both gave mental nods of agreement. Bella looked up at us and I realised that we were all sitting there like slack jawed idiots, displaying our shock quite clearly. She took a deep breath and asked.

"So can you shift back for this chat?" In unison, we all regretfully shook our heads. "Ok. Well that's going to make this whole thing a little trickier, but I'll try to stick to yes or no questions and if I say something that you need more explanation on, just give me a sign and I'll try to make it clearer. That work for you?" This time just I nodded. "Alright then. So where to start." she mused. "I figure you know who I am?" We all nodded and I wondered if she had even the slightest inkling that she might know us too. I was glad she didn't ask. "Right. Well if you know who I am, then you'll know who my dad is too?" Again, we nodded. "The red-head is after me, but she's threatening Charlie too, she basically told me that if I don't give myself up to her then she'll get me anyway, but she'll kill him first. My wolf made another attempt to snatch control, but this time I was ready for it and all that came out was one loud growl, which made her lean as far back as she could in alarm, before I managed to swallow it back with a great deal of effort. I looked at her, hoping she could read the apology in my face and Embry said  
_"How does she know what the red-head wants? She said 'she basically told me', that means the leech is communicating with her somehow. Fuck! How the fuck am I supposed to ask her a fucking question?" _He ground out frustrated, and let out a little whine, tilting his head to one side in a questioning way.

"You need me to explain something?" She asked and he nodded.

_"Clever girl, Bella!" _He said, happily. _"Maybe this won't be quite so hard after all, if she's this quick off the mark." _ Bella sat thoughtfully for a moment, obviously trying to work out what she'd said that led to a question. After a moment she asked.

"You want to know how she spoke to me, is that it?" Embry nodded quickly.

"_She's pretty good at this Dr Dolittle shit." _Jake chuckled and I had to smile mentally at the thought. Bella began to explain

"I was out on my motorcycle and had a little accident. So after a little concussion, a lot of self-humiliation due to said concussion," Jake and I snorted in amusement at the memory. "and a short stay at the Rez clinic, I went to collect my bike, only to find a letter addressed to me from the vampire. Her name is Victoria by the way. I'm sure you don't really care, but just in case you do….." At hearing that the leech had dared to leave a threatening letter for Bella, all three of us were emitting a low growl, but she didn't react with fear this time. Instead she gave us a stern look and I almost yelped.

_"Fuck. My mom uses that look." _I said on reflex and regretted it a little when Jake and Embry grinned. Bella continued once again.

"So anyway, that's how I know what she's planning. And the vampire you just kept from turning me into a human sippy cup was Laurent, an old friend of hers." The phrase 'human sippy cup' had us all snorting in amusement again and she gave a wry grin before continuing. "She asked him to come see if the Cullens were still around and didn't warn him about you guys, so as she obviously knows the Cullens aren't here anymore, I'm guessing that she really wanted to see if another Vampire would be able to get past you and get to me. You should probably be ready for her to try that again; if she can't find another friend to make the next attempt, she'll probably make one." We sat in silence for a moment, digesting that thought.

_"Shit. She's right. We're going to have to start in on some real training, and get our patrols doubled up to make sure we're completely covered._" I said, proud that Bella had come to such an intelligent conclusion.

"Back to my story then." Bella continued, marshalling her thoughts. "I'm sure you're aware of who I was dating before they all left, but what you're probably not aware of was what happened about a year ago. I went to watch the Cullens playing baseball one evening and we were interrupted by three nomad vampires, human drinkers." She shuddered a little at the memory and I realised that these must've been the three scents that I'd picked up on when I first phased. By the looks of it, the three of them must've passed through our area quite a lot before us wolves had made our reappearance. "They were Laurent, Victoria, and Victoria's mate, James." She went on. "James was a really sick fuck, he was obsessed with the hunt, and the greater the challenge, the more he enjoyed it, he was into making his prey suffer too, so when he got a whiff of me in the baseball clearing, his hunting instincts were put on high alert – hunting a human who was protected by a whole family of vampires, what could be a greater challenge than that?" Her story was now being told with a constant background sound of growling coming from all three of us this time, but she ignore it and went on as if she hadn't noticed, which was just as well as I wasn't sure any of us would've been able to knock it off just then. Her next sentence made Jake almost yelp in surprise, and I made a mental note to ask him why later on, but I didn't want to miss any of what Bella was saying, so I let it go for the moment. "Edward got me out of there, but James had already begun the hunt and I was worried Charlie wold get caught in the crossfire, so I picked a fight with him while I knew James was listening, and Alice, Jasper and I drove off to Phoenix while the rest of the family tried to lead James off on a wild goose chase elsewhere and kill him. He took the bait for a while, but then worked out the ruse and came for me. He managed to convince me that he had my mom hostage and would kill her unless I gave myself up to him. So of course I went. Turned out it was a trick and he nearly killed me, but Edward and the other Cullens got there in time and killed him instead. Now Victoria's on a mad bid for revenge and she's not going to stop until she gets what she wants; me dead. And probably in as painful a way as she can manage." She came to a halt in her story, breathing fast and I guessed that she was trying to get a hold on her fear again. I wasn't surprised she was finding it hard to share all of this – She'd had no-one to tell about it all since the Cullens left and it must've been eating at her insides all this time. It must've felt good to finally let it all out though, to have no more secrets and not to need to hold anything back., and I was glad we were able to do that for her.

_"Proof if proof were needed that she is the single bravest person on the planet." _I breathed to the other two and they nodded in awed agreement.

_"She's been through some serious shit, and then not been able to share a word of it with anyone. It must've been almost harder to keep all that inside and be forced to lie to her dad and her friends, than it was to actually live through it." _Embry added thoughtfully, echoing my own thoughts. _"I mean, yeah we can't tell certain people about us, and for Sam and me it's tough to not have our moms know, but at least we've got each other to talk to, and the Elders if need be. Imagine not being able to tell a single soul. No wonder she was so fucked up when the Cullens left."_

_"Jake, before I forget, what had you so surprise a few minutes ago, when Bella was talking about her ex getting her away from the mad sadist leech?" _I asked, and Jake looked stunned again.

_"Yeah well to be honest, 'surprised' doesn't really cover it. Shocked senseless would be closer." _He gave a mental head shake and continued. _Ever since the Cullens left she has _never once _said any of the Cullens names. Not even the family name. If anyone else said it, or even hinted it, she'd fold over double, grabbing her chest like someone was ripping into it with a rusty chainsaw, and sometimes she'd go into a huge panic attack." _I remembered the strange turn she'd taken when I first ran into her and Charlie on the beach and Charlie had accidentally mentioned me finding her that night in the forest. Watching the memory as it played in my head, Jake nodded. _"Yeah. Just like that. Now as she started to get better, the panic attacks lessened, and she was gradually able to talk about things that skirted around the memories of the Cullens, but one thing she would never, ever do was use Edward's name. It was always 'Him', emphasis on the capital H. I honestly think that if any of us would've said 'His' name in the beginning, she would've just fallen right back into her depression again and maybe never come back out." _He looked at me thoughtfully for a moment and then continued. _"Maybe something, or _someone _has gotten her past it finally." _I couldn't help the mental smirk that crept over me at the thought, but a part of me was still reeling in horror at finally understanding just how much the Cullens, and _Edward _in particular, had fucked her up when they left her all alone to deal with this epic shit storm. On the edge of my awareness, I noticed that Bella's heart-rate had suddenly dropped and my head snapped up to look at her. She wasn't asleep, and didn't seem to be meditating, like the only time I could recall her heart-rate being so slow (apart from this particular evening).

_"She's doing it again." _I said, drawing Jake and Embry's attention to her heart. _"How the fuck is she doing that? It's bizarre. Like she can switch it back and forth at will."_

_"I really have no clue." _Embry said, _"but look at how much calmer she is now. She must do it to calm herself when she's stressed."_

_"Cool." _Jake murmured, and I just continued listening to her heart and watching her thoughtfully. Noticing me watching, she nodded calmly at me and continued talking now that she had our attention once more.

"Vampires mate for… well I was going to say life, but I guess eternity would be the better word to use. Killing one mate creates a rabid, vengeance obsessed monster in the form of the other mate, and to be honest, I'm not sure that Victoria was entirely sane even when James was alive, so you guys should be aware of the fact that she will do anything, anything to get to me, and she won't care if she dies in the process, as long as I die too." She a breath before continuing, and when she went on I saw why she'd needed to make herself so calm.

"I accepted a while ago that she'd probably kill me. I don't want to die. But if it wouldn't destroy my dad to lose me, then I'd hand myself over with a smile on my face and a song in my heart to keep him safe. As it is, it might come to that anyway, my life for his and if that's the price I'll pay it, but I've put him through so much already, if it can be avoided, I don't want him to have to suffer through losing me too, especially as I'm pretty sure that after Victoria's through with me, there's no way anyone should be allowed to find my body. I came out here today hoping to lure Victoria out and hoping even more that you wolves would track her in time to keep her from killing me, although if you'd only got here in time to kill her after she killed me, that would've been enough to keep Charlie safe so I wouldn't have blamed you for not saving me." None of us could keep from growling as the idea of her being killed was brought up. I myself might've been impressed with the cool, calm way she discussed it, as if she was talking about adding something to a shopping list – emotion free. But I was filled with anger that she'd found herself in a position where she'd felt that her only options involved putting herself in such danger. She might not have blamed us if we'd not saved her, But none of us would've ever forgive ourselves. I honestly believed that even Paul, and probably Leah too would've taken her death due to our failure very badly, and Jake, Embry and I, and probably Jared would've been devastated by her loss.

"So here's the thing then." She went on. "Will you please keep Charlie safe? Will you keep the vindictive bitch away from him?" There was no decision to make – we were already committed to keeping Charlie safe and be happy to continue to do so. We all nodded solemnly and she let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you. I know that you're there to protect your tribe," Again I was surprised; she apparently also knew that we were Quileute and knew what our duty was, "but I was hoping you'd be able to help him too. I know it's selfish of me to ask. I don't want you to risk your own lives, or to neglect other duties in the process, but for Charlie's sake I have to at least put it out there; will you keep Victoria away from me too?" She was looking down at her hand again and so was missing our eager, almost frantic nodding as we all confirmed that we'd keep her safe from this Victoria leech. She went on, still not looking up, and the three of us just kept our nodding up, looking like retarded nodding dogs in our eagerness to assure her. "I know I have no right to ask, I know that I'm the one that brought this on myself, that by associating with your natural enemy I probably negated any right I might've had to ask, and if it wasn't for Charlie, I wouldn't be asking, but for Charlie's sake I will ask. Please. Can you keep me alive?" Paul would've completely agreed with her on that point, but luckily he didn't have a say here, and I was firmly convinced that even he wouldn't have let her die just because of who her ex was. She finally looked up to find us all nodding enthusiastically and repeatedly and I saw her shoulders relax a little – she really hadn't been at all sure we'd help her, and yet had still had the guts to come out here and risk everything to try to keep her dad safe. Amazing.

"There's one more thing too." She added, and I wondered what that could be – we'd agreed to keep her and Charlie safe, what on earth else was there? "I've been very selfish and I've managed to drag someone else into my shit storm. He's a good man and doesn't deserve to get hurt because of me." She shrugged her shoulders, and I suddenly had an inkling where she was going with this, I was torn. On the one hand she might say something very embarrassing for me, on the other, I was getting a rare opportunity to maybe hear exactly how she felt about me. I hesitated. On a third hand, did I _want _to hear exactly how she felt about me? "I've done what I can to make sure he's not hurt emotionally if something happens to me – for as long as I've known Victoria was after me I've known I can't afford to let anyone else get too close to me; it would be bad enough to have my dad destroyed by my death without adding more people in, so I made it clear I wasn't looking for anything long-term or serious, not that he's interested in that with me anyway, so we're all ok there, but even though I've only really spent time with him on the Rez, where it would be harder for Victoria to pick up on any connection between us, I'm still worried that he'll end up as collateral damage so I wanted to make sure that you'd keep him safe just like Charlie." Yep it was definitely about me, and I was amazed to discover that the real reason that she hadn't wanted to commit to anything serious or long term had nothing to do with going away to college, but everything to do with protecting me in case she would up vampire fodder. I was struck yet again by how brave and selfless she was. There was just one thing that confused me; how could she be so insightful, so sharp, so quick to notice the slightest thing and intelligent enough to put all of this together, and yet so dense that she hadn't realised that I _was _interested in more with her, even though I knew I really, really shouldn't be?

"It's Sam Uley, the guy I'm seeing, so he comes under your protection anyway, he's not just part of your tribe, but the new chief, isn't he? But it's better if you know that he might be a target thanks to me." Jake and Embry were finding this whole thing hilarious and were grinning widely at the situation, though they had thankfully restrained themselves so far from commenting. When Bella raised a brow at us, we realised we'd not responded and, feeling a little ridiculous, we nodded, just for her peace of mind. She let out a relieved sigh and leaned back with her hands behind me, signalling that she was finished. She'd obviously forgotten her sore hand though, and the second it touched the ground she snatched it back and put it in her lap, leaning back on just her good hand this time.

The silence that began to draw out was a little awkward.

_"Aaaand we're back to sitting and staring at each other again." _Jake said sarcastically, Embry and I turning to look at him as he spoke. _"How are we supposed to ask the questions we need to ask? Like, oh I don't know, _how the fuck she knows about us?" He had a good point. We really couldn't let this all wrap up without knowing where she'd got her information from. Charlie had promised not to tell her, and I didn't think he was the sort to break that promise, but the question would be raised by the Elders (or more specifically by Old Quil) if I didn't have an answer ready to give them.

_"You're right, Jake. We do need to know how she knows, but I just thought; we also need to get her to hang around the Rez as much as possible. With three new wolves to train, and yes I do include you in that – you may be taking to the life incredibly well, but you're still green and inexperienced and we need to train you properly just like the others, we don't need to be spreading ourselves too thin if we don't need to. If we have Charlie and Bella on the Rez as much as possible, we don't need to be so concerned. But how do we tell her that? Morse fucking code?" _I nearly growled again in frustration as I turned back to Bella.

"Pissed because you can't ask me the questions you need to?" She asked with a little smirk, and I snorted and nodded, not at all surprised that once again she'd seen to the heart of the problem. "Well I thought of a couple of things you might've wanted to ask, and if there's anything else, I'll just have to start making guesses until I hit on the right question." She told me, sitting back upright again. "I guessed you'd want to know how I knew about you shape-shifters?" She asked and we grew very still all of a sudden, the tension pouring from us.

_"Clever, clever Bella. Right on the money with her first shot again." _I said, nodding slowly.

"Well I'd heard Carlisle Cullen talk about an extinct clan of wolf shape-shifters in the Quileute tribe, which was my starting out point." She began, and I guessed I could understand why Dr Vamp had thought we were extinct, but I was still a little pissed that he'd talked about us with a human. Bella went on. "A friend of mine told me a few of your old stories, not believing them to be anything more than spooky stories to scare the kids with, and certainly not realising that he'd basically just outed the Cullens as vampires, bearing in mind my weird ability to notice and connect little details"

_"Oh SHIT!" _Jake burst out. _"That was me. Fuck. I really didn't believe any of it back then, obviously, but technically I broke the treaty. If they'd known, the Cullens could've attacked us. I'm so sorry, Sam" _the shame washing off him was almost stifling, and we needed to concentrate on Bella so I just told him

_"We'll handle it later, Jake." _And gave my full attention back to Bella.

"After the Cullens left I spent a lot of time wishing there were still wolves around so that I could ask for help with the Victoria stuff, and then after the bear sightings started, and then I got the letter from Victoria, telling me that hiding behind the guard dogs wouldn't protect me," We all growled again at that, but she ignored it and continued, "I connected the dots and realised that the extinct clan of wolf shape-shifters weren't so extinct after all. That's when I came up with my plan to find you and ask for help." She said. She gave a little shrug and blushed. "I was going to come on Wednesday, but something tempted me to risk at least one more day," She smiled a little, and I suddenly realised what she'd meant when she'd muttered 'worth risking an extra day for' just before we'd left on our date. I felt a little smug that she'd been attracted enough to me that she'd put such an important matter on hold to go out with me. She continued.

"and then I was weak and managed to justify another day after that, and then another, but then I had a dream that freaked me out and reminded me just how selfish I was being, and how many people might be put at risk if I kept stalling, so I bit the bullet and got it over with. So anyway that's pretty much how I know." I wondered if the dream she was talking about was the nightmare I'd overheard that morning. It'd certainly sounded bad enough to freak her out. I noticed she hadn't made any mention of Taha Aki, who I knew for a fact ha featured in at least one of her dreams and the desire to know how she knew about him burned in me. So far my only possibility was that Jake had told her – the Dr Leech couldn't have done, and that was the other place she'd gotten her information on us. I'd have to have a serious conversation with Jake. And soon.

Apparently finished with telling us how she'd worked out we existed, Bella moved on to another subject. Once again hitting the nail on the head in terms of knowing what we'd need to ask her.

"I'm also guessing you wanted to ask me to stay on the Rez as much as I can, and to encourage Charlie to do the same thing so you guys don't have to spread yourselves too thin. Was that one of the things you needed to say?" I nodded again. "Ok, I can do that and so can Charlie, although I'll have to find some way to encourage him to do it without telling him about you guys I'm guessing." We all burst into barking laughter. Charlie was always searching for ways to encourage Bella to spend more time on the Rez. If she began returning the favour, they'd pretty much never leave. Which was actually fine with me.

"So was there anything else?" She asked, then she froze suddenly. "Oh fuck, do you want me to stop seeing Sam so he can be safer?" She asked in a slightly panicked voice, her eyes filling with tears. "I mean if it's best for his safety then of course I'd do it, but otherwise, I'd really like to keep seeing him as long as I can." I was thrilled that she hated the idea of not seeing me anymore upsetting, but I didn't want her to be unnecessarily upset so I immediately shook my head, o. In her distress though, she wasn't noticing, and continued rambling. "I've already got the emotional worries covered, even if I was the sort of girl he could be interested in long-term, which I'm not, we've both agreed that we're not to let things get too serious, so if I have to stop seeing him because of Victoria, or if she does manage to get me, I've kept him far enough away emotionally speaking that he'd not be too hurt." I continued my emphatic head shaking as she spoke, but I was astounded at her opinion that she wasn't the sort of girl I could be interested in long-term.

_"So intelligent and insightful in everything else, so dense when it comes to her own worth." _ I thought as I still shook my head at her. Behind me, Jake and Embry were almost pissing themselves laughing but I ignored them and focused on calming Bella down. After everything she'd been through that evening, she'd never looked closer to losing her grip than she did at that moment. It was very gratifying to know how important I was becoming to her. Just about as important as she was becoming to me, however unwise that might be. Still, once the Elders gave permission to tell her our identities, I'd be able to explain about imprinting and let her decide for herself if she wanted to run the risk. I knew what my vote would be. She finally seemed to register my shaking head, and she took a few deep breaths in relief. Her heart-rate abruptly dropped once again and I cocked my head and narrowed my eyes, making it clear to her this time that I'd noticed what she was doing. As soon as I had the Elders permission to tell her who I was, I was going to get her to spill on how she did that.

"So unless there's anything else," She suddenly said, "I need to head home. I left a note for Charlie giving a very, very vague explanation of why I'd gone just in case things went badly, and I want to get back before him so that he never gets a chance to read it." I had a sudden bad feeling that maybe that note had something to do with Charlie's black mood earlier. It certainly fitted some of the things he'd said. I wished I was able to warn her of what she might be walking into when she got back, but there was no way to do it. She stood and dusted off her damp clothes, looking about in the dark to try to work out which direction she'd come from. She turned back to us.

"I don't suppose that your wolf bodies come equipped with night vision do they?" She asked. "I could use a point in the right direction." We all grinned, amused, at her for a moment before turning to each other.

_"You guys head back to the Rez and I'll lead her back. Phase back as soon as you're home – I don't want certain people knowing exactly what was said here tonight until I can be there to head off the inevitable shit fits." _I told them

_"Got it, Boss." _They replied in unison and I rolled my eyes at them. They gave Bella a quick nod to say goodbye and melted into the forest behind us, leaving Bella and I alone. I jerked my head over to my left, inviting her to follow and we slowly walked across the clearing together.

"So I'm gonna guess that you're in charge of the pack?" She asked and I turned to look at her, tilting my head quizzically. "Well you're a lot bigger than any of the others, except for that russet coloured guy, you're only a couple of inches bigger than him." She explained. "Also it's the way you hold yourself around them and the way they hold themselves around you." She shrugged a little when I looked at her again. "I've always been good at reading how people interact with each other." She stated simply.

_"Yeah. Except when you're involved in the equation." _I mentally snorted. But I was impressed once again by her perception and how quickly she'd worked out the pack order. She really was her father's daughter. Her and Charlie working together could probably solve any mystery with their eyes closed. I'd have to watch myself around the pair of them.

We walked in silence through the forest, with me stopping to give her something to lean on whenever she tripped, which was very, very often. I was struggling not to laugh at her endearing clumsiness and by the fifth trip, my shoulders were shaking with repressed laughter and I had to turn my head to hide my grins. By the tenth trip I'd given up and was letting out loud choking barks of laughter. True to form, she couldn't help joining in, despite her embarrassment.

"Ok I know. I'm a clumsy person. I can't help it, I always have been and no doubt I always will be. Next time I'll talk you into letting me ride you. "She said through her laughter and my own suddenly cut off and I stopped dead in my tracks as the graphic image she'd managed to put in my head played out. Me on my back, my hands firmly on Bella's hips, pulling her up and down on my cock as she rode me naked, her glorious hair flying as she threw her head back in her ecstasy. Bella had walked on a few more paces alone before I was able to fight back the image and come back to my senses.

"You ok?" She asked as I shook my head clear of my fantasy and looked around for her. I gave her a sheepish look, embarrassed that I'd zoned out like that, then caught up and walked a little ahead of her, not wanting the temptation of staring at her ass as we walked and falling back into another little fantasy. Once we got back to her truck, I sat and watched her as she fished the keys out of her pocket, unlocked the door and climbed in. Before she closed the door she asked me.

"Am I right in guessing that you're going to follow me home to make sure I get there safely?" I nodded. "Well I would say that I'll go slowly so you can keep up, but judging by how fast you guys moved when you took out Laurent, I guess it would be pointless." I gave her another grin in answer and she closed the door. "See you there then." she said and started the engine with a loud roar and headed to her house.

I trailed her back and as she parked, I slipped around the back of her place to get out of sight of the neighbours and to check for any vampire scents. Now we knew that Bella was the target, I was taking no chances. One of us was going to be patrolling in the area of the Swan's house every night from now on.

Bella let herself in her front door and then immediately walked right through the house and opened the back door, stepping outside and looking around for me.

"Thank you." She said. "For seeing me home safely, for agreeing to protect Charlie, Sam and for me too, and thank you so much for not letting that dreadlocked dick kill me this evening." I snorted with amusement at her description of the leech, and she smiled. "Well I'm going to go in and grab that letter before Charlie gets home, so goodnight. I'll be seeing you soon, no doubt. And thanks again."

She went back in and closed the door.


End file.
